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The JareBear's Blog
Cowards 
Posted on November 5, 2016 at 09:47 PM.
I have recently tried to reach out to a number of OSers with personal, heartfelt, personal messages typically with the intent to reconcile or just touch base. Most of those attempts were completely ignored. To me that is cowardly, especially since I know a lot of these guys probably chose to just laugh about it and make fun of me (behind my back, of course) in their private, elitist exclusive OS Popular Guy groupme chats that I was never cool enough to be invited to, that I have heard so much about and seen snippets from from time to time.

That's fine. If that makes them feel big, or superior, or powerful, just to be able to treat me like that, good for them, that's cool. Go for it.

I just want to thank you for the venom. I will thrive off it and use it to motivate myself to be a better person moving forward. Laugh at me, mock me, insult me, make memes of me, turn me into a running gag. It's cool. I'm a loser, I get it.

To the people who DID respond to me and acknowledge my communication, whether it was a positive or negative response, I appreciate you and thank you. That was The Man thing to do. That's how men act. Thank you. Even being told I am not someone you wan to game with anymore at least made me feel better that you read the message I sent and had enough balls and courtesy to respond to it. It's real easy to talk **** about people in GroupMe. It's not easy to have direct communication with someone especially when the subject is somewhat difficult or awkward.

It's real easy to judge people from afar. Whatever helps you sleep at night. To the people who ignored me, you know who you are. Maybe you won, because you did it to spite me and I am here acknowledging that it hut my feelings and bothered me, but at the same time I am glad that true character has been revealed. All I can say is that I hope you are never in as low of a place as I have been, and I hope that you never are at the mercy of people you met online to feel any sort of social validation, only to have that need for friendship and that desire to be accepted completely ignored and crapped on. I wouldn't wish that on my first ****ing enemy.

I hope you never find yourselves legitimately alone with no one to talk to. I hope you never find yourselves living in a basement sitting in front of a computer screen for the majority of your free time drenched in regret and loneliness contemplating things that you can't admit openly because people would use that admission to hurt you rather than help you.

I can accept that I am not a cool enough, or funny enough, or good enough gamer enough (all those things) type of guy to be part of your crew or your "online buddy" but I am a human being and honestly I just think it is the decent thing to do to at least acknowledge people when they attempt to reach out to you, but maybe thats just me.

Thanks to anyone who read this, and be good to one another.
Comments
# 1 kehlis @ Nov 7
Instead of condemning those who haven't responded to you can you please reach out to those that have? You've ignored many attempts from others trying to reach out to you.
 
# 2 MrDubya @ Nov 12
Sorry you are having such a rough time. I sincerely wish you happiness in whatever you choose to do. I feel the despair all the time, and this year has been terrible on me emotionally and mentally. Peace
 
# 3 33JAF @ Nov 13
I have no idea what this is about. I happened to stumble upon your blog from the front page. If you want to talk to someone who is understanding and non judgmental, feel free to PM me. I know I am a stranger, but sometimes it's good to chat with someone who can see things without an bias. I'm sorry you are going through a hard time, even if I don't know you, just remember that tough times never last, but tough people do.
 
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