TCFA Dynasty - French University of New York

[fantastic flying froggies]

Poughkeepsie Journal, July 3rd

In a surprising move, the French University of New York (FUNY) announced yesterday in a press conference the launch of their new football program.

Mr. Jeff Lamour, Director of the Sports Department for the school, said during the conference : "It's something we had been thinking about for a while now and with this new Solecismic Conference being set up, it was too good an opportunity to pass up. This will help up put FUNY, and Poughkeepsie, back on the map."

Mr. Fantastic was introduced as Head Coach. Mr Fantastic, whose football references include winning a pair of Super Bowls with his fantasy football teams, is currently General Manager of a soccer team in the south of France. Asked to comment on the state of his team, Mr Fantastic replied : "Well, what you have to keep in mind is that people who come here do so to learn the French language, the French culture. While this includes such great things as gourmet cooking, fine love making, and running around waving a little white flag, it unfortunately does NOT include football. I have a dozen guys on the team who know what a football looks like. I have a coupla guys on the team who've ever seen a football. And I have maybe one guy who's ever touched a football. That being said, I'll be happy with a couple of wins this season."

Our reporter was lucky enough to find that one person who's ever touched a football. Sammy Grado, a 6'6" 215 lbs senior projected as the starting tight end for the Flying Froggies. "I played in high school with the Spackenville Spartans, and we lost nearly every game, so I'm used to loosing. I'm very happy that FUNY starts a football team. Just too sad the fu@*ers do it when I'm in my senior year !"

The next news in the story of FUNY football will be the announcement of the conference schedule. There are also rumours of a scrimmage game against another university before the official start of the season.