What Would Jesus Pay?

thesloppy · 07-14-2003, 09:24 AM

http://espn.go.com/nfl/news/2003/0714/1580339.html

Former Cowboy sued over auto repair bill

DALLAS -- Former Dallas Cowboys cornerback Deion Sanders is battling an automotive shop over what he says Jesus told him to pay for a repair bill.

The owner of the repair shop says Sanders wanted to pay only $1,500 of the $4,265.57 bill, saying that Jesus had informed him that was all he needed to pay.

"It's the 'Praise Jesus' discount,'' attorney Ed Edson told The Dallas Morning News in Monday's editions.

Edson said he has been trying to collect the bill from Sanders since 2001 on behalf of Phil Compton, the owner of the car repair business.

Through court filings, the player says the accusations are untrue. Sanders' attorney, Edmund Gomez, did not return a telephone call early Monday from The Associated Press.

The lawsuit was scheduled to go to trial later Monday before state District Judge Joe Cox in Dallas County civil court.

Anthony Montoya, a representative for Sanders, had contacted Compton and told him a 1961 Lincoln Continental convertible needed to be towed to his shop for repairs. The car had been repaired before by Compton.

Papers filed in his lawsuit stated that he and his mechanics installed a new radiator and thermostat, flushed the engine, repaired the car's electrical system and gauges, replaced the starter motor, removed contaminated fuel and rebuilt the carburetor. Mechanics for Magrathea Inc., Compton's company, had replaced gaskets and hoses.

Sanders had approved and Montoya had approved all the repairs, according to the lawsuit. But when the car was returned to the CBS sportscaster's home in Plano on Nov. 5, 2001, Compton said Pilar Sanders, the former Cowboy's wife, "answered the door, took the keys and invoices, started the car to make sure it was working and went back into the locked house, refusing to return the keys or invoices.''

Sanders' bodyguards and housekeepers then moved their cars in front of and behind the Lincoln so that it couldn't be towed back to the garage, the lawsuit stated.

When Sanders drove up, he refused to pay the invoice amount, handing Compton a $1,500 check and saying, "Praise Jesus ... I follow what in my heart I'm told to pay.''

JPhillips · 07-14-2003, 09:34 AM

Jesus told me to buy a pirated copy of CM4 from Thailand for $4.59. Sorry Marc, but I gotta follow the Lord.

Ksyrup · 07-14-2003, 09:35 AM

Jesus Rebuilt My Hotrod.

Subby · 07-14-2003, 09:42 AM

He's too blessed to be stressed!

thesloppy · 07-14-2003, 10:02 AM

And the Lord did look down upon the vehicle, and He examined the scratch. After some moments, and consultation with Jeb the Angel of Repair and Restoration, the Lord did turn to Deion, and He said "You can buff that shit out."

Critch · 07-14-2003, 10:07 AM

Maybe Jesus should have a word with Deion about all that money he took from the Redskins?

Fritz · 07-14-2003, 10:58 AM

I don't know about that Jesus guy. We were out a bar having a few drinks as we used to do from time to to time. sometime during the evening I bumped into this girl I hadn't seen in several years and invited her over. The three of us spend the evening sipping Mai Tais and telling dirty jokes. By closing time I could tell the woman was interested in me and suggested that two us go back to my place - an offer she seemed receptive to. Well, the Mai Tais caught up with my bladder, so I excused myself for a quick trip to the bathroom. When I returned, Jesus was there but the woman was gone. He told me she got a page and had to leave. Crappy luck!

A few weeks later I was in the Wal-Mart shopping for roach motels when I bumped into this woman. I told her how good it was to see her and invited her to dinner. She declined my invitation, so I started to press a little. Finally she broke down and told me that Jesus said that I was destined for eternal damnation and that I broke wind in my sleep. So much for getting a date.

In short, Jesus cock-blocked me.

tucker342 · 07-14-2003, 11:10 AM

hahahaha

This is why I hate Deion Sanders.

Also, when people do this type of shit, it makes me want to pimp slap their ass!

44Niners · 07-14-2003, 11:15 AM

Proper way to invoke religion in sports:

“My faith helped me find the internal strength to fight through the adversity and I feel truly blessed for abilities god gave me.”

Wrong way:

“Well God was with us today and he helped us get that first down on 4th and 23 so we kicked their ass!”

Umm – I sure hope God is pretty impartial when it comes to sporting events.

tucker342 · 07-14-2003, 12:04 PM

Something tells me that god doesn't really care about Deion's car repair bill.

ice4277 · 07-14-2003, 12:27 PM

Well at least the formula is still correct:

Deion Sanders = Massively huge sack of shit

Anrhydeddu · 07-14-2003, 12:30 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by 44Niners
Proper way to invoke religion in sports:

“My faith helped me find the internal strength to fight through the adversity and I feel truly blessed for abilities god gave me.”

Wrong way:

“Well God was with us today and he helped us get that first down on 4th and 23 so we kicked their ass!”

Umm – I sure hope God is pretty impartial when it comes to sporting events.

Yep.

JeeberD · 07-14-2003, 01:20 PM

Deion is such a dick.

Oh, and why is it "Former Cowboy Deion Sanders"? He spent the most years playing for the Falcons. He also played for the Niners and the ForeSkins. Haven't the Cowboys had enough bad press in the past? Does Deion now have to forever be considered a Cowboy?!?!?!

MylesKnight · 07-14-2003, 01:22 PM

In a word Jeebs..... YES!

Franklinnoble · 07-14-2003, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by JeeberD
Deion is such a dick... Does Deion now have to forever be considered a Cowboy?!?!?!

Sounds fair to me.

EagleFan · 07-14-2003, 03:29 PM

I like it even better when you hear boxers thanking God. Thanks you for allowing me to beat the hell out of my opponent. Like God had a dime on the fight and wanted to make sure you won.

B & B · 07-14-2003, 03:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ksyrup
Jesus Rebuilt My Hotrod.

That was choice. Nice one.

sabotai · 07-14-2003, 04:06 PM

" I like it even better when you hear boxers thanking God. Thanks you for allowing me to beat the hell out of my opponent. Like God had a dime on the fight and wanted to make sure you won."

Yeah, i like this too. It's kind of funny seeing all these God-crazed boxers when if you think about it, if Jesus was around today, I'd think the sport he'd most likely not agree with is boxing. I just don't see Jesus as a big boxing fan.

44Niners · 07-14-2003, 04:53 PM

I'm not sure Jesus would get NASCAR either, then again I don't get NASCAR so...

tucker342 · 07-14-2003, 05:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by JeeberD
Deion is such a dick.

Oh, and why is it "Former Cowboy Deion Sanders"? He spent the most years playing for the Falcons. He also played for the Niners and the ForeSkins. Haven't the Cowboys had enough bad press in the past? Does Deion now have to forever be considered a Cowboy?!?!?!

see not only does your team smoke crack, and get arrested, now they're cheap to!

Mac Howard · 07-14-2003, 09:30 PM

Perhaps the repair shop owner should change his name to Caesar

Travis · 07-14-2003, 11:06 PM

And yet the judge rules in favor of Deion. Apparently now it wasn't just what God told him to pay, but what he had told the mechanic his ceiling was for the repair cost.

Wee bit of a turnaround on his reasoning behind not paying a penny over $1,500.

Ruling

sabotai · 07-14-2003, 11:21 PM

"During the one-day trial, a representative for Sanders testified that he told Compton there was a $1,500 ceiling on the cost of repairs. "

What...a representative for Sanders...you mean Sanders didn't even bother to show up?

Axxon · 07-14-2003, 11:24 PM

I read it like the representative is the one who informed the shop owner of the ceiling so he had to testify about that. Seems likely that Sanders would leave such a detail to somebody else.

sabotai · 07-15-2003, 12:00 AM

Hmm, maybe you're right. It's a shame when you become so rich and have so many hobbies, that you actually have to hire represenatives to do your hobbies for you.

Axxon · 07-15-2003, 12:12 AM

I'd like to check that out first hand before commenting further sabotai.

JonInMiddleGA · 07-15-2003, 12:16 AM

Which is about how I figured this would turn out, another crook trying to rip off somebody with some cash they figured wouldn't bother to tell 'em no.

mckerney · 07-15-2003, 01:46 AM

Wait, did the Jesus Jesus tell him that, or Jesus from The Big Lebowski? Cause the second guy was a sex offender.

"Nobody fucks with the Jesus."

Butter · 07-15-2003, 10:51 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Ksyrup
Jesus Rebuilt My Hotrod.

Satan is My Motor.

Swaggs · 07-15-2003, 11:56 AM

The judge was probably afraid of eternal damnation.

07-14-2003, 09:34 AM	#2
JPhillips Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Newburgh, NY	Jesus told me to buy a pirated copy of CM4 from Thailand for $4.59. Sorry Marc, but I gotta follow the Lord. __________________ To love someone is to strive to accept that person exactly the way he or she is, right here and now.. - Mr. Rogers

07-14-2003, 09:35 AM	#3
Ksyrup This guy has posted so much, his fingers are about to fall off. Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: In Absentia	Jesus Rebuilt My Hotrod. __________________ M's pitcher Miguel Batista: "Now, I feel like I've had everything. I've talked pitching with Sandy Koufax, had Kenny G play for me. Maybe if I could have an interview with God, then I'd be served. I'd be complete."

07-14-2003, 09:42 AM	#4
Subby lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: sans pants	He's too blessed to be stressed! __________________ Superman was flying around and saw Wonder Woman getting a tan in the nude on her balcony. Superman said I going to hit that real fast. So he flys down toward Wonder Woman to hit it and their is a loud scream. The Invincible Man scream what just hit me in the ass!!!!! I do shit, I take pictures, I write about it: chrisshue.com

07-14-2003, 10:02 AM	#5
thesloppy Pro Starter Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: PDX	And the Lord did look down upon the vehicle, and He examined the scratch. After some moments, and consultation with Jeb the Angel of Repair and Restoration, the Lord did turn to Deion, and He said "You can buff that shit out." __________________ Last edited by thesloppy : Today at 05:35 PM.

07-14-2003, 10:58 AM	#7
Fritz Lethargic Hooligan Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: hello kitty found my wallet at a big tent revival and returned it with all the cash missing	I don't know about that Jesus guy. We were out a bar having a few drinks as we used to do from time to to time. sometime during the evening I bumped into this girl I hadn't seen in several years and invited her over. The three of us spend the evening sipping Mai Tais and telling dirty jokes. By closing time I could tell the woman was interested in me and suggested that two us go back to my place - an offer she seemed receptive to. Well, the Mai Tais caught up with my bladder, so I excused myself for a quick trip to the bathroom. When I returned, Jesus was there but the woman was gone. He told me she got a page and had to leave. Crappy luck! A few weeks later I was in the Wal-Mart shopping for roach motels when I bumped into this woman. I told her how good it was to see her and invited her to dinner. She declined my invitation, so I started to press a little. Finally she broke down and told me that Jesus said that I was destined for eternal damnation and that I broke wind in my sleep. So much for getting a date. In short, Jesus cock-blocked me. __________________ donkey, donkey, walk a little faster

07-14-2003, 10:07 AM	#6
Critch lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Herndon, VA	Maybe Jesus should have a word with Deion about all that money he took from the Redskins?

07-14-2003, 11:10 AM	#8
tucker342 Pro Starter Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Iowa City, IA	hahahaha This is why I hate Deion Sanders. Also, when people do this type of shit, it makes me want to pimp slap their ass!

07-14-2003, 11:15 AM	#9
44Niners In The Penalty Box Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Brentwood, CA	Proper way to invoke religion in sports: “My faith helped me find the internal strength to fight through the adversity and I feel truly blessed for abilities god gave me.” Wrong way: “Well God was with us today and he helped us get that first down on 4th and 23 so we kicked their ass!” Umm – I sure hope God is pretty impartial when it comes to sporting events.

07-14-2003, 12:04 PM	#10
tucker342 Pro Starter Join Date: Mar 2002 Location: Iowa City, IA	Something tells me that god doesn't really care about Deion's car repair bill.

07-14-2003, 12:27 PM	#11
ice4277 Pro Rookie Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Berkley, MI: The Hotbed of FOFC!	Well at least the formula is still correct: Deion Sanders = Massively huge sack of shit Last edited by ice4277 : 07-14-2003 at 12:27 PM.

07-14-2003, 01:20 PM	#13
JeeberD General Manager Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The Town of Flower Mound	Deion is such a dick. Oh, and why is it "Former Cowboy Deion Sanders"? He spent the most years playing for the Falcons. He also played for the Niners and the ForeSkins. Haven't the Cowboys had enough bad press in the past? Does Deion now have to forever be considered a Cowboy?!?!?! __________________ UTEP Miners!!! I solemnly swear to never cheer for TO

07-14-2003, 01:22 PM	#14
MylesKnight College Benchwarmer Join Date: Feb 2002 Location: Neptune Beach, Florida	In a word Jeebs..... YES! __________________ IT'S ALL ABOUT THE BLACK & GOLD!!

07-14-2003, 03:29 PM	#16
EagleFan Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Mays Landing, NJ USA	I like it even better when you hear boxers thanking God. Thanks you for allowing me to beat the hell out of my opponent. Like God had a dime on the fight and wanted to make sure you won. __________________ The EagleFan YouTube Channel - Reactions Soarin' & Scratchin' YouTube Channel - We react to music, videos, TV, we talk, we are planning some field trips Soarin' & Soothin' - Meditation, Relaxation, and Sleep Aid; mental health is important

07-14-2003, 04:06 PM	#18
sabotai General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Satellite of Love	" I like it even better when you hear boxers thanking God. Thanks you for allowing me to beat the hell out of my opponent. Like God had a dime on the fight and wanted to make sure you won." Yeah, i like this too. It's kind of funny seeing all these God-crazed boxers when if you think about it, if Jesus was around today, I'd think the sport he'd most likely not agree with is boxing. I just don't see Jesus as a big boxing fan.

07-14-2003, 04:53 PM	#19
44Niners In The Penalty Box Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Brentwood, CA	I'm not sure Jesus would get NASCAR either, then again I don't get NASCAR so...

07-14-2003, 09:30 PM	#21
Mac Howard Sick as a Parrot Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Surfers Paradise, Australia	Perhaps the repair shop owner should change his name to Caesar __________________ Mac Howard - a Pom in Paradise

07-14-2003, 11:06 PM	#22
Travis Pro Rookie Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Canada eh	And yet the judge rules in favor of Deion. Apparently now it wasn't just what God told him to pay, but what he had told the mechanic his ceiling was for the repair cost. Wee bit of a turnaround on his reasoning behind not paying a penny over $1,500. Ruling __________________ "I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it." - Rogers Hornsby

07-14-2003, 11:21 PM	#23
sabotai General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Satellite of Love	"During the one-day trial, a representative for Sanders testified that he told Compton there was a $1,500 ceiling on the cost of repairs. " What...a representative for Sanders...you mean Sanders didn't even bother to show up?

07-14-2003, 11:24 PM	#24
Axxon Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Phoenix, AZ	I read it like the representative is the one who informed the shop owner of the ceiling so he had to testify about that. Seems likely that Sanders would leave such a detail to somebody else. __________________ There are no houris, alas, in our heaven.

07-15-2003, 12:00 AM	#25
sabotai General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Satellite of Love	Hmm, maybe you're right. It's a shame when you become so rich and have so many hobbies, that you actually have to hire represenatives to do your hobbies for you.

07-15-2003, 12:12 AM	#26
Axxon Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Phoenix, AZ	I'd like to check that out first hand before commenting further sabotai. __________________ There are no houris, alas, in our heaven.

07-15-2003, 12:16 AM	#27
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	Which is about how I figured this would turn out, another crook trying to rip off somebody with some cash they figured wouldn't bother to tell 'em no. __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

07-15-2003, 01:46 AM	#28
mckerney Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	Wait, did the Jesus Jesus tell him that, or Jesus from The Big Lebowski? Cause the second guy was a sex offender. "Nobody fucks with the Jesus."

07-15-2003, 11:56 AM	#30
Swaggs Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	The judge was probably afraid of eternal damnation. __________________ DOWN WITH HATTRICK!!! The RWBL Are you reading In The Bleachers?

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