Advice

SunDancer · 08-26-2003, 10:26 PM

Being 19 year old college sophmoore, I kinda been starting to express a deeper interest in a girl that I work with outside of college. The thing is, she is around 23/24 girl who just begain med school last week. Bad news is she just kinda got a new b/f. Just curious, is this too old? What's the "age range" for a good relationship?

Easy Mac · 08-26-2003, 10:32 PM

She must be older than 12. And she probably won't date a younger man.

The_herd · 08-26-2003, 10:37 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Easy Mac
She must be older than 12. And she probably won't date a younger man.

Good ol' southern advice on women.

kcchief19 · 08-26-2003, 10:50 PM

I always heard the phrase, "If there's grass on the field, play ball," but then again I'm from the sticks.

Just my 2 cents based on past history, I don't think the age different is a big problem, but I see two other danger flags in your situation: med school and the b/f. Med school to college really puts you in different worlds, and that can cause real problems.

I was always chasing older women (the woman I've been with for the the last 8 years was 33 and I was 24 when we started dating), so that's not a big age difference. That being said. Until you hit 22, my general rule is to double the difference in ago for a "true" reading. So in your case, going out with her would be like her dating a 32 year old. Not a huge difference, but it can be difficult.

Of course, this doesn't apply if your name is Ashton or her name is Demi.

Swaggs · 08-26-2003, 10:51 PM

Definitely within the age range. Although, if she just started dating someone, your odds do not sound so hot.

Eaglesfan27 · 08-26-2003, 11:16 PM

From personal experience: Medical school is a very rough time for dating. During medical school, my girlfriend and I almost broke up multiple times. We are now happily married (for over 4 years), but it is an incredibly stressful time with a very high time demand. Also, I discovered most medical students date other medical students due to the huge amount of time they spend together and because of the understanding of the other person's hectic time schedule and emotional rollercoaster of medical school.

Either way, good luck

SunDancer · 08-26-2003, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Eaglesfan27
From personal experience: Medical school is a very rough time for dating. During medical school, my girlfriend and I almost broke up multiple times. We are now happily married (for over 4 years), but it is an incredibly stressful time with a very high time demand. Also, I discovered most medical students date other medical students due to the huge amount of time they spend together and because of the understanding of the other person's hectic time schedule and emotional rollercoaster of medical school.

Either way, good luck

Thanks...That what I been thinking. I don't feel anything for her, but am somewhat interested.

mckerney · 08-26-2003, 11:42 PM

Old enough to buy you booze if you're 19, young enough to still be classified as a 'nubile young coed' by Coffee. Best way to determine this would be by posting a picture.

Godzilla Blitz · 08-27-2003, 12:03 AM

A woman once told me when I was really drunk that the age difference that has the best marriage success percentage is when the man is six years older than the woman.

I have no idea if this is true or not, or whether I even remember the story right, or to be honest, if the story actually happened or not, but there's got to be an age difference out there that is best, eh?

I'd say five years ain't nothing. Well, five years younger might get you in a bit of trouble, but five years older? No problem. Go for it. But the boyfriend is a rather large obstacle, no? Can you kill him in a way where she won't find out you did it?

Travis · 08-27-2003, 12:19 AM

Your age divide by 2, add 8 for the youngest.

Your bank account times 10 for anybody older (and preferably a bad cough).

Problem solved.

And don't forget, first marriage is for money, the second's for love, the third, well, things just come in threes.

Calzone · 08-27-2003, 12:22 AM

Has anyone noticed that all of mckerney's 'advice' ends with him asking for a pic posted of the persons significant other?

mckerney · 08-27-2003, 12:25 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Calzone
Has anyone noticed that all of mckerney's 'advice' ends with him asking for a pic posted of the persons significant other?

Shut up

JeeberD · 08-27-2003, 12:28 AM

MC's just a lonely, lonely boy...

mrsimperless · 08-27-2003, 07:28 AM

I'd say if you were both 4-5 years older it wouldn't matter. But at the ages you are right now.... hmmmm. Think of it this way, wht if you were both 5 years younger? She would be your age and you would be 14. No way that would work. As you age, the differences mean less and less. I'd say it is borderline right now. It all depends if she is comfortable with it. Perhaps you are merely on the friend ladder? Jumping ladders is a dangerous proposition, regardless of any age differences.

Samdari · 08-27-2003, 07:46 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by JeeberD
MC's just a lonely, lonely boy...

Im not lonely. In fact, being married, I'd kill for 5 minutes alone. I still want the picture.

Fritz · 08-27-2003, 07:50 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz
A woman once told me when I was really drunk that the age difference that has the best marriage success percentage is when the man is six years older than the woman.

Evidently 7 1/2 years older may be too much....

Bee · 08-27-2003, 07:56 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Godzilla Blitz
A woman once told me when I was really drunk that the age difference that has the best marriage success percentage is when the man is six years older than the woman.

So Shorty should be scouting the talent at the local Pre-school?

KevinNU7 · 08-27-2003, 08:10 AM

Do you have a fake ID? Most 22-25 year old like to go bars and stuff and won't date someone who can't go with them because they are too young.

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 09:00 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fritz
Evidently 7 1/2 years older may be too much....

Yourself and (the estranged?) Mrs. Fritz?

SunDancer - As others have said, you being on one side of 21 and her on the other might be a bit of a hindrance on the dating scene.

I myself am 3 years younger than my wife, but we started dating when I was 22 and she was 25.

Fritz · 08-27-2003, 09:44 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by cuervo72
Yourself and (the estranged?) Mrs. Fritz?

yea.

---

honestly, I don't think age matters a bit unless you are looking for a life long mate. Even then the age delta is not so important as finding someone who has already developed their personality (as opposed to their persona) and is growing along the same path as you at about the same rate.

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 09:55 AM

Agreed, the age itself doesn't matter much (my brother was seeing a 30 year old when he was 22, IIRC). But there is a BIG difference between a college sophomore and a med student (as Eaglesfan27 has already pointed out). Now, if they're just looking to both have a little fun, no problem.

In my case the age difference did set up an interesting juxtaposition with myself and my wife's sister's husband. He's 13 years my senior, and now a retired Lt. Col. from the Marines. We're also both in computer fields, but different areas of expertise (web development vs. networking).

Eaglesfan27 · 08-27-2003, 10:31 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by cuervo72
But there is a BIG difference between a college sophomore and a med student (as Eaglesfan27 has already pointed out). Now, if they're just looking to both have a little fun, no problem.

I agree. If you and she are both looking just to have fun, it could work fine. However, the BF would still be an obstacle to that path. But if she was free of BF and you just wanted to "have fun" it could work if you didn't get emotionally involved or too clingy. One of my classmates used to like to "have fun" with younger college boys in town because they both knew that was all it was and she didn't feel a huge time committment to them and she could still focus on her work.

mckerney · 08-27-2003, 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Samdari
Im not lonely. In fact, being married, I'd kill for 5 minutes alone. I still want the picture.

Hey, you're not me

korme · 08-27-2003, 12:59 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mckerney
Old enough to buy you booze if you're 19, young enough to still be classified as a 'nubile young coed' by Coffee. Best way to determine this would be by posting a picture.

mckerney, hook it up liquor man store guy minnesotian

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 01:00 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Samdari
In fact, being married, I'd kill for 5 minutes alone with the picture.

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:02 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by mckerney
Shut up

oh and mckerney, that was a classic way of getting pointed out

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:04 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fritz
yea.

---

honestly, I don't think age matters a bit unless you are looking for a life long mate. Even then the age delta is not so important as finding someone who has already developed their personality (as opposed to their persona) and is growing along the same path as you at about the same rate.

Fritz when do you think the age is when people really start to find out alot about themselves and develop a personality as you say?

mckerney · 08-27-2003, 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shorty3281
oh and mckerney, that was a classic way of getting pointed out

I know, by someone who's only posted here 5 times in two years, but apparently reads all my posts.

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:11 PM

agreed stinkyfeet

Franklinnoble · 08-27-2003, 01:13 PM

We don't have enough information.

We know this chick is smart (med school). We don't know what her personality is like. We don't know if she's hot.

If she's a total babe and has a tendency to be superficial and materialistic, you're screwed. Although a lot depends on this other boyfriend... how old is he? What kind of money does he make? What kind of car does he drive?

You gotta punch your weight, dude. Do the math - if the odds are in your favor, take a shot. Otherwise, cut your losses. You're in college - there's tons of available honies to chase there... don't waste your time on the unattainable.

Fritz · 08-27-2003, 01:18 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shorty3281
Fritz when do you think the age is when people really start to find out alot about themselves and develop a personality as you say?

I think that happens at different ages. Despite what they think, most younger people have no idea who they are, but there are certainly exceptions.

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:18 PM

what the fuck?

an unsarcastic, nicely mannered post by franky?

whats going on here?

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:19 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fritz
I think that happens at different ages. Despite what they think, most younger people have no idea who they are, but there are certainly exceptions.

agreed, although i feel over the past year or so i've really came into my own i guess. but who knows.

mckerney · 08-27-2003, 01:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shorty3281
what the fuck?

an unsarcastic, nicely mannered post by franky?

whats going on here?

Alright, I'll do it for you:

Shorty, whenevery you want to know the answer to this question, just ask yourself how old you are, and then it will be two years older than that.

Happy?

Fritz · 08-27-2003, 01:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Shorty3281
what the fuck?

an unsarcastic, nicely mannered post by franky?

whats going on here?

summer is almost over and all the hardbodies are going home.

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 01:25 PM

I believe the "life long mate" him/herself has a big influence on that personality.

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:29 PM

nobody said it was easy
it's such a shame for us to part

lurker · 08-27-2003, 01:45 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Franklinnoble
Although a lot depends on this other boyfriend... how old is he? What kind of money does he make? What kind of car does he drive?

Do you really think that would matter to a girl in med school? Unless she is really materialistic, which you mentioned as a separate issue.

One of my really good friends dated the cable guy when she was in med school. Who knows? A college sophomore wouldn't necessarily be so bad. Except for the fact that she already has a boyfriend, I would say give it a shot.

korme · 08-27-2003, 01:48 PM

lurker to the rescue

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 01:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by lurker
Do you really think that would matter to a girl in med school? Unless she is really materialistic, which you mentioned as a separate issue.

Having gone to Johns Hopkins, where there were a goodly number of pre-meds....yes, it would matter to some of them.

lurker · 08-27-2003, 02:01 PM

Yeah, it would matter to some, the materialistic ones, which he mentioned as a separate group. But it probably wouldn't matter to most.

And come on, what kind of car he drives? I can honestly say I don't know a single girl that this would matter to.

Fritz · 08-27-2003, 02:01 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by lurker
Regardless of the fact that she already has a boyfriend, I would say poke her.

women are so dirty

Marmel · 08-27-2003, 02:08 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fritz
women are so dirty

Only if you find the right one.

The Afoci · 08-27-2003, 02:10 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Marmel
Only if you find the right one.

People who don't bathe are dirty.

KWhit · 08-27-2003, 02:17 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Samdari
Im not lonely. In fact, being married, I'd kill for 5 minutes alone. I still want the picture.

You just want to have 5 minutes alone with the picture.

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 02:42 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by The Afoci
People who don't bathe are dirty.

Can't we go for one day around here without bashing the French?

The Afoci · 08-27-2003, 02:44 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cuervo72
Can't we go for one day around here without bashing the French?

I give up.

I guess we can't.

SunDancer · 08-27-2003, 03:17 PM

Well, I volunteer at a local hospital insitute, along with her...Is she hot? Yeah, maybe "borderline hot". I kinda find the "car" alittle out of date.

cuervo72 · 08-27-2003, 08:14 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Fritz
summer is almost over and all the hardbodies are going home.

Is that Hardbodies or Hardbodies 2?

Craptacular · 08-27-2003, 09:04 PM

I was 25 and my wife 21 when we started dating. I wouldn't worry about the age difference.

08-26-2003, 10:51 PM	#5
Swaggs Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	Definitely within the age range. Although, if she just started dating someone, your odds do not sound so hot. __________________ DOWN WITH HATTRICK!!! The RWBL Are you reading In The Bleachers?

08-26-2003, 11:16 PM	#6
Eaglesfan27 Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: New Jersey	From personal experience: Medical school is a very rough time for dating. During medical school, my girlfriend and I almost broke up multiple times. We are now happily married (for over 4 years), but it is an incredibly stressful time with a very high time demand. Also, I discovered most medical students date other medical students due to the huge amount of time they spend together and because of the understanding of the other person's hectic time schedule and emotional rollercoaster of medical school. Either way, good luck __________________ Retired GM of the eNFL 2007 Super Bowl Champion Philadelphia Eagles (19-0 record.) GM of the WOOF 2006 Doggie Bowl Champion Atlantic City Gamblers. GM of the IHOF 2019 and 2022 IHOF Bowl Champion Asheville Axemen.

08-27-2003, 12:03 AM	#9
Godzilla Blitz College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000	A woman once told me when I was really drunk that the age difference that has the best marriage success percentage is when the man is six years older than the woman. I have no idea if this is true or not, or whether I even remember the story right, or to be honest, if the story actually happened or not, but there's got to be an age difference out there that is best, eh? I'd say five years ain't nothing. Well, five years younger might get you in a bit of trouble, but five years older? No problem. Go for it. But the boyfriend is a rather large obstacle, no? Can you kill him in a way where she won't find out you did it? __________________ Current Blog Projects: Final Fantasy: Lost in Japanese Kaboom Review

08-27-2003, 12:19 AM	#10
Travis Pro Rookie Join Date: Aug 2001 Location: Canada eh	Your age divide by 2, add 8 for the youngest. Your bank account times 10 for anybody older (and preferably a bad cough). Problem solved. And don't forget, first marriage is for money, the second's for love, the third, well, things just come in threes. __________________ "I don't want to play golf. When I hit a ball, I want someone else to go chase it." - Rogers Hornsby

08-27-2003, 12:28 AM	#13
JeeberD General Manager Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: The Town of Flower Mound	MC's just a lonely, lonely boy... __________________ UTEP Miners!!! I solemnly swear to never cheer for TO

08-26-2003, 10:32 PM	#2
Easy Mac Registered User Join Date: Nov 2001 Location: Here	She must be older than 12. And she probably won't date a younger man.

08-26-2003, 10:50 PM	#4
kcchief19 Pro Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Kansas City, MO	I always heard the phrase, "If there's grass on the field, play ball," but then again I'm from the sticks. Just my 2 cents based on past history, I don't think the age different is a big problem, but I see two other danger flags in your situation: med school and the b/f. Med school to college really puts you in different worlds, and that can cause real problems. I was always chasing older women (the woman I've been with for the the last 8 years was 33 and I was 24 when we started dating), so that's not a big age difference. That being said. Until you hit 22, my general rule is to double the difference in ago for a "true" reading. So in your case, going out with her would be like her dating a 32 year old. Not a huge difference, but it can be difficult. Of course, this doesn't apply if your name is Ashton or her name is Demi.

08-26-2003, 11:42 PM	#8
mckerney Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000	Old enough to buy you booze if you're 19, young enough to still be classified as a 'nubile young coed' by Coffee. Best way to determine this would be by posting a picture.

08-27-2003, 12:22 AM	#11
Calzone n00b Join Date: Mar 2001	Has anyone noticed that all of mckerney's 'advice' ends with him asking for a pic posted of the persons significant other?

08-27-2003, 07:28 AM	#14
mrsimperless College Prospect Join Date: Apr 2003	I'd say if you were both 4-5 years older it wouldn't matter. But at the ages you are right now.... hmmmm. Think of it this way, wht if you were both 5 years younger? She would be your age and you would be 14. No way that would work. As you age, the differences mean less and less. I'd say it is borderline right now. It all depends if she is comfortable with it. Perhaps you are merely on the friend ladder? Jumping ladders is a dangerous proposition, regardless of any age differences. __________________ "All I know is that smart women are hot. Susan Polgar beat me in 24 moves in a simultaneous exhbition. I slept with the scoresheet under my pillow." Off some dude's web site. Last edited by mrsimperless : 08-27-2003 at 07:30 AM.

08-27-2003, 08:10 AM	#18
KevinNU7 College Starter Join Date: May 2003 Location: Beantown	Do you have a fake ID? Most 22-25 year old like to go bars and stuff and won't date someone who can't go with them because they are too young. __________________ Boston Bashers - III.14 - (8347)

08-27-2003, 09:55 AM	#21
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Agreed, the age itself doesn't matter much (my brother was seeing a 30 year old when he was 22, IIRC). But there is a BIG difference between a college sophomore and a med student (as Eaglesfan27 has already pointed out). Now, if they're just looking to both have a little fun, no problem. In my case the age difference did set up an interesting juxtaposition with myself and my wife's sister's husband. He's 13 years my senior, and now a retired Lt. Col. from the Marines. We're also both in computer fields, but different areas of expertise (web development vs. networking). __________________ null

08-27-2003, 01:11 PM	#29
korme Go Reds Join Date: May 2001 Location: Bloodbuzz Ohio	agreed stinkyfeet

08-27-2003, 01:13 PM	#30
Franklinnoble Banned Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Placerville, CA	We don't have enough information. We know this chick is smart (med school). We don't know what her personality is like. We don't know if she's hot. If she's a total babe and has a tendency to be superficial and materialistic, you're screwed. Although a lot depends on this other boyfriend... how old is he? What kind of money does he make? What kind of car does he drive? You gotta punch your weight, dude. Do the math - if the odds are in your favor, take a shot. Otherwise, cut your losses. You're in college - there's tons of available honies to chase there... don't waste your time on the unattainable.

08-27-2003, 01:18 PM	#32
korme Go Reds Join Date: May 2001 Location: Bloodbuzz Ohio	what the fuck? an unsarcastic, nicely mannered post by franky? whats going on here?

08-27-2003, 01:25 PM	#36
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	I believe the "life long mate" him/herself has a big influence on that personality. __________________ null

08-27-2003, 01:29 PM	#37
korme Go Reds Join Date: May 2001 Location: Bloodbuzz Ohio	nobody said it was easy it's such a shame for us to part

08-27-2003, 01:48 PM	#39
korme Go Reds Join Date: May 2001 Location: Bloodbuzz Ohio	lurker to the rescue

08-27-2003, 02:01 PM	#41
lurker High School JV Join Date: May 2001	Yeah, it would matter to some, the materialistic ones, which he mentioned as a separate group. But it probably wouldn't matter to most. And come on, what kind of car he drives? I can honestly say I don't know a single girl that this would matter to. Last edited by lurker : 08-27-2003 at 02:02 PM.

08-27-2003, 03:17 PM	#48
SunDancer College Benchwarmer Join Date: Sep 2002	Well, I volunteer at a local hospital insitute, along with her...Is she hot? Yeah, maybe "borderline hot". I kinda find the "car" alittle out of date.

08-27-2003, 09:04 PM	#50
Craptacular College Starter Join Date: Oct 2001 Location: The Mad City, WI	I was 25 and my wife 21 when we started dating. I wouldn't worry about the age difference.

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