Iowa Barnstormers 2007: The Hitchhiker

[Grid Iron]

Dynasty Overview

The purpose of the Iowa City Barnstormers Dynasty is to tell a compelling and intriguing story using EA Sports Front Office Football (FOF2) as the backdrop. The stats are real, the story is not.

To catch up on the story so far, go to the following links:

Iowa Barnstormers Prologue
Iowa Barnstormers 2003: Thunder in the Sky
Iowa Barnstormers 2004: A New Threat
Iowa Barnstormers 2005: Compromised
Iowa Barnstormers 2006: Quality Control

House Rules (Updated 3/12/04!)

I employ a fairly rigorous set of "house rules" (no real NFL players, no franchise tag, must maintain a 53-man roster, no renegotiating, can't make trade proposals except during the draft, trades must pass "fairness test", auto-sign rookies). During the 20-step free agent period, I may negotiate with any player who was on my team the previous season without restriction. As for free agents who did not play on my team the previous season, I may sign up to three of them during the 20-step process, but only one in the first 10 rounds. After the 20-step free agency period, I can only sign undrafted rookie free agents and players who were on my roster the previous season. All contracts signed outside of the 20-step process must be for exactly what the player asks, or for one year. Last, all multi-year deals must include a signing bonus equal to the highest year of the contract, unless I accept the player’s initial offer.

[Grid Iron]

Space Station Implodes, Burns Up

Artificial gravity program director commits suicide

January 1, 2007

Johnson Space Center, TX (AP) - In what is now considered the worst disaster in NASA history, the International Space Station imploded yesterday during a test of the Artificial Micro Gravity Generator (AMGG). The station, ripped apart from the inside out, rapdily fell from orbit and burned up upon re-entry into earth's atmosphere. Everyone on board, 10 scientists and astronauts, are presumed dead.

"This is a tragedy," said NASA Director Alex Guerra. "There was an unforseen glitch in the AMGG software, which prevented the system from shutting down the gravity generator after exceeding safe levels." Guerra explained that the generator continued to increase the gravitational forces within the station beyond that which the hull could withstand.

Local police announced shortly after the disaster that the AMGG director, Tim Livingston of Cal Tech, committed suicide. Authorities believe Livingston set fire to his home and then killed himself with a single shot to the head with a .45 caliber pistol. All that remained of the body was the charred remains of his skull and torso.

A global e-mail was sent from Livingston to all NASA employees in which he accepted responsibility for the tragedy, and blamed himself for not carefully checking a last-minute software modification.

[Grid Iron]

Testaverde Joins Hall of Fame

January 10, 2007

Canton, OH (AP) – Yesterday, quarterback Vinny Testaverde was inducted into the Pro Football Hall of Fame. Testaverde played 16 seasons in the NFL after being selected first overall by the Tampa Bay Buccanneers in the 1997 amateur draft out of the University of Miami. “I can’t believe it,” said Testaverde, the only player enshrined in 2007. “My entire career from high school to college to pro has been a dream come true.”

The 1986 Heisman Trophy winner, Testaverde finished his pro career among the best quarterbacks in the game. In 16 seasons with Tampa Bay, Cleveland, Baltimore and the New York Jets, Vinny racked up 47,965 passing yards, 302 touchdowns and 251 interceptions. His best season was in 2000 when he threw for 4,176 yards, 32 touchdowns and only 10 interceptions. Selected by an 89% vote, Testaverde made the playoffs five times, but never made it to the Super Bowl.

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: January 12, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

Tom,

The local police in Texas want to close out the investigation of Tim Livingston's suicide. They normally wouldn't do this, but given the high profile nature of the case, and NASA complaining all the time, they want to cover their you-know-whats. That means they want FBI to review the reports and coroner's findings.

The local FBI field office is filled with newbies. So. . . I need you to fly out there, read through the reports, and given them the ol' stamp of approval. Sorry about this, but it shoudn't take more than a day.

You leave from Dulles on Wednesday.

[Grid Iron]

Cha-Ching!

Barnstormers post 13% profit increase

January 16, 2007

Iowa City, IA (Ticker) – The Barnstormers’ continued success on the field is translating into dollars for the team’s ownership as the team posted a $10.76 million profit, a 13% increase from last season. “We’re very pleased that the team is financially healthy,” said team owner and president Ben Cleveland. “That allows us to put the best product possible out on the field.”

Cleveland added, however, that ticket prices are being raised between 1.5% and 5%, with the exception of Upper Deck seats, which will remain at $35 per game as they have for the past four years. “Keeping Iowa City football affordable for fans of every income level is important to us,” said Cleveland. Despite the increase, new prices are still below the average of Iowa’s two closest geographic rivals, St. Louis and Chicago.

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: January 19, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

I met with the Chief of Police today and got the royal treatment.

I'm looking over the reports now and everything seems to be in order. The coroner's report says Livngston suffered a single gunshot wound to the head and massive post-mortem burns. The legs were basically totally burned up, but the torso is largely intact.

I'm meeting with the medical examiner tommorrow morning, and I should be on the plane by the afternoon.

[Grid Iron]

Show Me the Money!

Denver QB signs $53 million deal with St. Louis

January 20, 2007

St. Louis, MO (AP) – The St. Louis Rams announced today that the team has signed free agent quarterback Fernando Sharber to a four-year $53.92 contract. “I’m really excited about this new opportunity and bringing another NFL Championship to St. Louis,” said Sharber at a team press conference.

The announcement surprised many and sent shockwaves throughout the AFC West. Sharber was expected to re-sign with the Denver Broncos, the team that made him the third overall pick in the 2002 draft out of Oregon State. That changed, however, when the Rams jumped into the bidding war at the last minute and offered Sharber $1 million more per year than the Broncos’ offer.

Sharber’s departure from the AFC West is good news for the Barnstormers, as he is considered one of the best quarterbacks in the league. In five seasons, Sharber led Denver to the playoffs four times, including three division titles and two NFL Championships. Sharber has 14,836 careers passing yards, 96 touchdowns, 54 interceptions, and was named Super Bowl MVP in 2003.

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: January 20, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

Hey, I was planning on coming back this afternoon, but I found something I want to follow up on.

I'm sure it's nothing, but I want to be as thorough as possible.

I'll be back by the end of the week.

[Grid Iron]

Sweet Cedric!

Iowa lures All-League DT away from 49ers

January 22, 2007

Iowa City, IA (Ticker) – Iowa GM Jack “Grid” Iron announced today that the team has signed free agent defensive tackle Cedric Brown to a four-year $32.97 million contract that includes a $6.8 million bonus. “Cedric is one of the best run-stoppers in the game,” said Iron of Brown, who played the last five seasons for the 49ers. “I think he is the last piece to the puzzle on defense for us.”

A first round pick in 2002 (16th overall) out of Montana State, Brown had his best year last season when he recorded 71 tackles, 9.5 sacks and recovered two fumbles. He was named All-League Second Team each of the last two seasons. “I really like the direction the Barnstormers are going,” said Brown. “It was an easy decision for me.”

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: January 23, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

I know I was just supposed to give the local police a rubber stamp, but I've found something unusual about Livingston's suicide note.

I need to interview some techs at NASA and then go to Cal Tech to speak with his former colleagues. Something doesn't make sense.

I'll send you an update when I finish my investigation.

[Grid Iron]

Rite of Spring!

Barnstormers draft Valpo fullback with first pick

April 26, 2007

New York, NY (Ticker) – With the 25th overall pick in the 20007 NFL draft, Iowa GM Grid Iron selected Valparaiso fullback Wally Springer. Springer, who is expected to sign a six-year $19.9 million contract that includes a $6.24 million bonus, gives Iowa much-needed depth at the fullback position. “He’s a great run blocker and performs well on third down,” said Iron. “He’ll be a perfect complement to (running back) Friendship (Lofton).”

The 6'1" 243 pound Springer played running back his entire college career at Valparaiso but insists he is up to the challenge of a position change. “I pride myself on my blocking game, so I’m sure I’ll succeed in the NFL whether I play fullback or tailback,” he said. “I’m a team player, and I’ll do whatever is necessary to get a championship.”

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: April 30, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

Here's what I've found, and it's very interesting. Livingston wrote in his suicide note that he made several changes to the AMGG software shortly before the test which caused the disaster. Well, I spoke with some software engineers at NASA about it and they described the code as "extremely complex." They said someone would need to be "very well versed" in writing code to implement the changes Livingston did to the AMGG software.

Here's the catch: I can't find any record of Livingston having anywhere near the training necessary to make the changes that caused the AMGG to malfunction.

I spoke with over 20 of his colleagues from Cal Tech, and MIT where he got his PhD. I researched his background extensively and pulled up his transcripts all the way back to high school. I can't find any evidence that he would have known how to write such complex stuff, let alone any evidence he ever took a computer programming course.

Livingston was an engineer, not a computer programmer. He spent his time coming up with ideas, not writing code.

The bottom line is that it just seems very suspicious that a guy with no experience in writing complex software would be able to modify the code on the very complex AMGG.

What does it mean? I don't know. But it's worth looking into more.

I'm having our lab re-test the ballistics. They should have a report in a few months.

[Grid Iron]

20007 Season Preview

Is this finally the Barnstormers’ year?

August 15, 2007

Iowa City, IA (ESPN) – After making the playoffs three straight years and finishing the exhibition season with a 3-1 record, the expectations are high in the Iowa Barnstormers locker room. “It’s time we took our game to the next level,” said head coach Travis O’Donnell. “We’ve been so close to a division title every year, but we just can’t get over that hump.”

One thing the team will be counting on to get over the proverbial hump is one of the best defensive lines in the league. In the off-season, Iowa general manager Grid Iron signed All-League defensive tackle Cedric Brown to bolster the run defense and take the pressure off the team’s two outstanding defensive ends, Brock Darlington and Stephen Bonham.

On the offensive side of the ball, fifth-year quarterback Roman Roberts has established himself as one of the best in the league. Over the past two seasons, Roberts has thrown for 6,830 yards and scored 48 touchdowns (39 pass, 9 rush) against just 16 interceptions. Consequently, the pressure will now be on second-year wide receiver Jorge Ellison to take his game to the next level. Last year’s Offensive Rookie of the Year, Ellison caught 58 passes for 760 yards and two touchdowns. “I’m ready to step up,” said the team’s first-round pick (24th overall) in 2006 out of Bowling Green. “I want the ball on every play.”

The Barnstormers' schedule will be tough, as Iowa plays only seven of its 16 games against teams that finished last year with a losing record. However, two of Iowa’s games are against the reigning Super Bowl Champion Denver Broncos, who are expected to decline significantly after losing superstar quarterback Fernando Sharber to St. Louis via free agency in the off-season.

Here is the complete Barnstormers schedule:

Week 1 Denver Broncos
Week 2 Oakland Raiders
Week 3 MIAMI DOLPHINS
Week 4 Washington Redskins
Week 5 SEATTLE SEAHAWKS
Week 6 SAN DIEGO CHARGERS
Week 7 KANSAS CITY CHIEFS
Week 8 New England Patriots
Week 9 Philadelphia Eagles
Week 10 OPEN
Week 11 Seattle Seahawks
Week 12 OAKLAND RAIDERS
Week 13 Kansas City Chiefs
Week 14 DALLAS COWBOYS
Week 15 DENVER BRONCOS
Week 16 San Diego Chargers
Week 17 ARIZONA CARDINALS

[Grid Iron]

FBI BALLISTICS REPORT

To: Tom Coleman, Special Agent

From: Max Zither, Criminalist

Date: August 20, 2007

Re: Tim Livingston Suicide Investigation, Case #07-432

On May 1, 2007, I received Evidence Item #123, a SIG Sauer P220 .45 caliber pistol from the evidence room. I was instructed to examine the weapon and compare the barrel rifling to the slug retrieved from crime scene. Below are my findings:

1. The marks on the slug found at the scene match the rifling grooves from the barrel of the weapon. In my opinion, Item #123 was the weapon used to fire the lethal gunshot in this case.
   
   
2. A visual inspection reveals that the gun bears the serial number 1236765431. Computer database records show a firearm bearing that serial number was sold to a Tim Livingston at Big 5 in Pasadena, California, on January 1, 2006.
   
   
3. A microscopic examination has revealed, however, that the serial number on the gun has been altered using a sophisticated laser inscription system. In my opinion, the weapon that killed Tim Livingston was not the one purchased by him in 2006. Rather, a different firearm was altered to appear as if it was Livingston's own gun.
   

I am attempting to re-construct the real serial number on Item #123, but that process could take several weeks. I will forward my findings as soon as the examination is complete.

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to call.

[Grid Iron]

NFL Weeks 1-4

Week 1: Barnstormers (0-0) (-2) at Broncos (0-0)

Denver running back Antoine Kolodzik ran for 204 yards and two touchdowns as the Broncos edged the Barnstormers 24-20.

Week 2: Barnstormers (0-1) (-2) at Raiders (0-0)

Oakland kicker Ryan Longwell nailed a 22-yard field goal with :05 on the clock to lift the Raiders to a 29-28 victory over the Barnstormers. The loss ruined an otherwise great day for quarterback Roman Roberts, who was 15 of 26 for 273 yards, 4 TD and 1 INT.

Week 3: Barnstormers (0-2) (-5) vs. Dolphins (1-1)

Iowa kicker Jim Lane made field goals of 56, 55 and 39 yards in the Barnstormers’ 23-21 victory over the Dolphins.

Week 4: Barnstormers (1-2) at Redskins (1-2) (-1)

Roman Roberts threw for 220 yards and scored all of Iowa’s three touchdowns (2 rush, 1 pass), as the Barnstormers cruised to a 27-14 victory over the Redskins. Starting flanker Geoff Wynn suffered a bruised shoulder and will miss 3-5 weeks.

1/4 Season Review

At 2-2, the Barnstormers are two games back of division-leading Seattle. Defensive end Brock Darlington has been phenomenal so far, recording 4.0 sacks, three hurries and two blocked passes in just four games.

Here are the complete AFC West standings:

AFC West                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Seattle                 4   0   0   1.000 94    71    3-0-0   4-0-0     
Kansas City             3   1   0   .750  95    94    1-1-0   3-1-0     
Oakland                 2   1   0   .667  85    74    1-1-0   1-1-0     
Iowa City               2   2   0   .500  98    88    0-2-0   1-2-0     
San Diego               2   2   0   .500  71    77    0-1-0   0-2-0     
Denver                  1   3   0   .250  82    112   1-1-0   1-1-0

[Grid Iron]

FBI BALLISTICS REPORT

(Supplemental)

To: Tom Coleman, Special Agent

From: Max Zither, Criminalist

Date: September 20, 2007

Re: Tim Livingston Suicide Investigation, Case #07-432

I have successfully recovered the original serial number from Evidence Item #123, a SIG Sauer P220 .45 caliber pistol, used in the alleged suicide of Tim Livingston.

In making this determination, I used a combination of acid recovery, as well as laser analysis. Below are my findings:

1. The real serial number etched into the firearm is 14738700037.
   
   
2. There is no record of the sale of a firearm bearing that serial number in the United States.
   

I am currently attempting to trace the sale of this firearm outside of the U.S., but the process could take several weeks.

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to call.

[Grid Iron]

NFL Weeks 5-8

Week 5: Barnstormers (2-2) (E) vs. Seahawks (4-0)

Quarterback Roman Roberts was 23 of 33 for 266, 3 TD, and 0 INT, as the Barnstormers annihilated the division-leading Seahawks by a score of 31-10.

Week 6: Barnstormers (3-2) (-12) vs. Chargers (2-2)

Roman Roberts was the hero again, completing 25 of 38 for 281 yards, 3 TD and 0 INT in Iowa’s 28-21 victory over San Diego. The victory pulled the Barnstormers into a tie with the Seahawks (4-2), who lost 30-19 to the Baltimore Ravens (5-1).

Week 7: Barnstormers (4-2) (-7) vs. Chiefs (3-3)

Kansas City quarterback Ryan Leaf tied the game on a one-yard touchdown pass late in the fourth quarter, but Iowa kicker Jim Lane nailed a 38-yard field goal in overtime to lift the Barnstormers to a 20-17 victory over the Chiefs.

Week 8: Barnstormers (5-2) (-6) at Patriots (2-3-1)

Kicker Jim Lane was the hero for the second week in a row, hitting a 37-yard field goal with :05 on the clock to give Iowa a 23-20 road victory over New England. Second-year wide receiver Jorge Ellison, the team’s first round pick last season, had a career day with seven catches for 135 yards and a touchdown.

2/4 Season Review

At 6-2, the Barnstormers are tied with the Seahawks for first place in the AFC West. Quarterback Roman Roberts continues to improve, leading the league with 2,234 passing yards and 17 touchdowns scored (14 pass, 3 rush). He has thrown just six interceptions.

AFC West                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Iowa City               6   2   0   .750  200   156   3-2-0   5-2-0     
Seattle                 6   2   0   .750  203   183   5-1-0   6-2-0     
Oakland                 4   2   1   .643  178   165   2-2-0   2-2-1     
San Diego               3   4   0   .429  152   158   1-3-0   1-4-0     
Denver                  3   4   0   .429  176   170   2-2-0   3-2-0     
Kansas City             3   5   0   .375  150   202   1-4-0   3-4-0

[Grid Iron]

FBI BALLISTICS REPORT

(Supplemental)

To: Tom Coleman, Special Agent

From: Max Zither, Criminalist

Date: October 20, 2007

Re: Tim Livingston Suicide Investigation, Case #07-432

I have traced the point of sale of Evidence Item #123, a SIG Sauer P220 .45 caliber pistol, used in the alleged suicide of Tim Livingston.

I previously discovered that the serial number on the firearm was fraudulent. After acid treatment and laser analysis, I determined that the real serial number etched into the firearm is 14738700037.

SIG Arms, Inc. has advised me that the real serial number belongs to a shipment of .45 caliber P220 weapons sold to the Bolivian Army in 2000.

I contacted the Bolivia Army Armory, which advised me that the weapon was purchased by them in March 2000.

However, the Bolivian Army did not keep records as to whom the weapon was assigned.

Consequently, we cannot further trace the chain of custody of the firearm that killed Tim Livingston.

If you have any questions, please do not hesitate to call.

[Grid Iron]

NFL Weeks 9-13

Week 9: Barnstormers (6-2) (-3) at Eagles (4-3) (-)

Defensive end Stephen Bonham was brilliant, recording two sacks and recovering a fumble that led to an Iowa touchdown, as the Barnstormers destroyed the Eagles by a score of 41-10. The victory put Iowa alone in first by a half game over the Seahawks, who were idle.

Week 10: Bye

In addition to getting much-needed rest, the Barnstormers extended their divisional lead to a full game over Seattle (6-3) thanks to the Seahawks’ 37-10 loss to the Broncos.

Starting flanker Geoff Wynn has recovered from his bruised shoulder and will be back next week.

Week 11: Barnstormers (7-2) (-2) at Seahawks (6-3)

Seattle dominated Iowa on both sides of the ball and pulled into a tie for first place with a 31-6 victory over the Barnstormers. Iowa linebacker Donny Grier had a busy day, making 18 tackles (all solo) and an interception.

Week 12: Barnstormers (7-3) (-7) vs. Raiders (6-3-1) (-)

Defensive end Brock Darlington had 2.5 sacks and quarterback Roman Roberts threw two touchdown passes as the Barnstormers defeated the Raiders 38-7. The victory lifted Iowa into sole possession of first after Seattle (7-4) lost to Arizona, 25-17.

Week 13: Barnstormers (8-3) (-3) at Chiefs (6-5)

Iowa running back Friendship Lofton rushed for 168 yards and two touchdowns to lead the Barnstormers past the Chiefs by a score of 30-7.

3/4 Season Review

At 9-3, the Barnstormers have won nine of ten and have a one-game lead over the Seattle Seahawks (8-4) for the AFC West title.

Here are the complete AFC West standings:

AFC West                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Iowa City               9   3   0   .750  315   211   5-3-0   7-3-0     
Seattle                 8   4   0   .667  296   265   6-2-0   8-3-0     
Oakland                 7   4   1   .625  278   274   4-3-0   5-3-1     
Kansas City             6   6   0   .500  256   282   3-5-0   5-5-0     
San Diego               5   7   0   .417  239   273   1-5-0   3-6-0     
Denver                  5   7   0   .417  318   285   3-4-0   5-4-0

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: November 12, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

It just doesn't make sense that Livingston would shoot himself with a gun that was bought by the Bolivian army, but had the serial number from the gun he bought in Pasadena etched on it.

I'd like to have the body exhumed so a medical examiner at headquarters can
take a look at him. There's got to be something I'm missing. . .

[Grid Iron]

NFL Weeks 14-17

Week 14: Barnstormers (9-3) (-8) vs. Cowboys (7-5)

Roman Roberts was 20 of 29 for 235 yards, 5 TD and 2 INT, as the Barnstormers beat the Cowboys 41-10.

Week 15: Barnstormers (10-3) (-8) vs. Broncos (5-8)

The Iowa defense had five sacks, five interceptions and allowed only 108 passing yards as the Barnstormers beat the Broncos 24-14. With the victory, Iowa clinched a playoff berth and stayed one game ahead of Seattle (10-4) in the AFC West race.

Week 16: Barnstormers (11-3) (-2) at Chargers (5-9)

San Diego scored 14 points in the final 1:12, including a 68-yard interception return with 30 seconds on the clock, as the Chargers stunned the Barnstormers by a score of 21-14.

With the loss, Iowa fell into a tie for first with Seattle (11-4). However, the Seahawks’ superior divisional record (8-2 vs. 6-4), gives them the tie-breaker advantage. To win the division next week, Iowa needs a victory over Arizona, coupled with a Seattle loss.

Week 17: Barnstormers (11-4) (-5) vs. Arizona (11-4)

The listless Barnstormers were flagged 12 times for 87 yards and scored only one touchdown, losing to the Cardinals by a score of 14-9. The loss was irrelevant, however, since the Seahawks beat the Cowboys 16-10 to clinch the AFC West.

4/4 Season Review

At 11-5, Iowa finished a frustrating single game back of Seattle in the AFC West race. The Barnstormers did, however, end the season with the best record of the wild card teams and will host the first playoff game ever at John Deere stadium next week when the Colts come to town.

Here are the complete NFL standings, with playoff teams in bold:

AFC East                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
New Jersey              11  5   0   .688  391   303   6-2-0   8-4-0     
Indianapolis            11  5   0   .688  373   286   5-3-0   8-4-0     
Miami                   8   8   0   .500  281   329   5-3-0   5-7-0     
Buffalo                 3   13  0   .188  282   384   3-5-0   3-9-0     
New England             2   13  1   .156  308   443   1-7-0   1-10-1    
   
AFC Central             W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Baltimore               11  5   0   .688  364   274   5-5-0   8-5-0     
Jacksonville            10  6   0   .625  385   295   7-3-0   8-5-0     
Tennessee               9   7   0   .563  361   330   4-5-0   6-7-0     
Cincinnati              8   8   0   .500  316   320   5-5-0   6-6-0     
Pittsburgh              7   9   0   .438  289   386   5-5-0   5-7-0     
Cleveland               6   10  0   .375  329   333   3-7-0   5-8-0     
   
AFC West                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Seattle                 12  4   0   .750  382   320   8-2-0   10-3-0    
Iowa City               11  5   0   .688  403   270   6-4-0   8-4-0     
Oakland                 9   6   1   .594  369   364   5-5-0   7-5-1     
Kansas City             8   8   0   .500  336   349   5-5-0   7-6-0     
San Diego               7   9   0   .438  330   368   3-7-0   5-8-0     
Denver                  6   10  0   .375  399   378   3-7-0   5-7-0     
   
NFC East                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Arizona                 12  4   0   .750  351   236   6-2-0   10-2-0    
Dallas                  8   8   0   .500  353   335   4-4-0   7-5-0     
Washington              8   8   0   .500  353   320   4-4-0   6-6-0     
Philadelphia            7   9   0   .438  304   368   4-4-0   5-7-0     
New York                5   11  0   .313  276   342   2-6-0   3-9-0     
   
NFC Central             W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
Green Bay               10  6   0   .625  401   299   7-1-0   10-2-0    
Tampa Bay               9   7   0   .563  292   309   5-3-0   7-5-0     
Detroit                 8   8   0   .500  296   372   2-6-0   5-7-0     
Minnesota               7   9   0   .438  321   412   3-5-0   5-7-0     
Chicago                 6   10  0   .375  307   302   3-5-0   6-6-0     
   
NFC West                W   L   T   Pct   PF    PA    Div     Conf  
St. Louis               11  5   0   .688  401   309   6-2-0   9-3-0     
Atlanta                 9   7   0   .563  293   343   5-3-0   7-5-0     
Carolina                8   8   0   .500  368   361   5-3-0   5-7-0     
New Orleans             5   11  0   .313  361   413   3-5-0   4-8-0     
San Francisco           3   13  0   .188  332   454   1-7-0   1-11-0

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: November 7, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

Ok, you got the approval to exhume the body. I had to call in a lot of favors.

One thing: keep it quiet. If it turns out you don't find anything, I don't want to get burned.

[Grid Iron]

First Time’s a Charm!!

Barnstormers rally past Colts for 31-28 victory

	Colts (11-6)	28
	Barnstormers (12-5)	31

December 7, 2007

Iowa City, IA (Ticker) – Barnstormers quarterback Roman Roberts threw for 295 yards, three touchdowns and one interception, and kicker Jim Lane nailed a 25-yard field goal with :01 on the clock, as Iowa edged Indianapolis in the first playoff game ever at John Deere Field.

“This is so awesome,” said Roberts, who was named game MVP. “It was really special to win this in front of the home town fans.”

Victory seemed almost out of reach when the Colts took a 28-20 lead with just under 3:44 left in the game. Iowa, however, would not be denied. Roberts orchestrated a 65-yard touchdown drive that culminated in a 22-yard touchdown pass to wide receiver Jorge Ellison, pulling the Barnstormers within two at 28-26. Roberts hit Ellison again in the endzone moments later for a two-point conversion to tie the game at 28-28.

Indianapolis took possession at their own 20-yard line with 1:54 on the clock—plenty of time for a quick drive into field goal ranged—but cornerback Luther Shepherd intercepted Manning at the Iowa 49, turning the tide. On third-and-four from the Indianapolis 45, Friendship Lofton broke free for a 27-yard run putting Iowa well within Jim Lane’s field goal range. Then, after three more runs by Lofton for 10 yards, Lane stepped onto the field and into the history books with his game-winning kick.

Box Score: Indianapolis Colts at Iowa City Barnstormers.  
  
Attendance: 58,300 (66,700), No-Shows: 0.  
  
Weather: 30 degrees, fair.  
  
1Q: 09:59 IND - Mark Schulters 11 pass from Peyton Manning.  
1Q: 09:59 IND - Emmitt Clark extra point.  
1Q: 03:35 IAC - Jim Lane 39 field goal.  
1Q: 03:09 IAC - Tyrell Reese 13 pass from Roman Roberts.  
1Q: 03:09 IAC - Jim Lane extra point.  
2Q: 12:11 IND - Terrell Owens 9 pass from Peyton Manning.  
2Q: 12:11 IND - Emmitt Clark extra point.  
2Q: 08:13 IAC - Tyrell Reese 42 pass from Roman Roberts.  
2Q: 08:13 IAC - Jim Lane extra point.  
2Q: 00:21 IAC - Jim Lane 21 field goal.  
3Q: 06:05 IND - Terrell Owens 9 pass from Peyton Manning.  
3Q: 06:05 IND - Emmitt Clark extra point.  
4Q: 03:35 IND - Mark Schulters 2 pass from Peyton Manning.  
4Q: 03:35 IND - Emmitt Clark extra point.  
4Q: 01:54 IAC - Jorge Ellison 22 pass from Roman Roberts.  
4Q: 01:54 IAC - Roman Roberts pass to Jorge Ellison for conversion  
4Q: 00:01 IAC - Jim Lane 25 field goal.  
  
Game MVP: IAC 7 Roman Roberts  
  
Indianapolis      7      7      7      7      -      28  
Iowa City         10     10     0      11     -      31  
  
Team Statistics          IND           IAC  
  
First Downs              26            20  
  
Rushes                   29            30  
Rushing Yards            113           128  
Yards Per Carry          3.8           4.2  
  
Pass Attempts            38            36  
Completions              24            19  
Passing Yards            265           295  
Yards Per Attempt        6.9           8.1  
Sacked                   1             2  
Yards Lost               7             12  
Net Passing Yards        258           283  
  
Interceptions            1             1  
Fumbles/Lost             2/2           1/0  
  
Total Plays              68            68  
Total Yards              371           411  
Yards Per Play           5.4           6.0  
  
3rd Down Plays           7/12          9/17  
  
Penalties                5             9  
Penalty Yards            54            73  
  
Time Of Possession       30:16         29:44  
  
Indianapolis Colts Individual Statistics  
  
Rushing                  Att    Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
26 Patterson             21     83     3.9    15     0  
25 Williams              3      11     3.6    5      0  
27 Harbaugh              2      2      1.0    1      0  
89 Owens                 1      -3     -3.0   -3     0  
22 Way                   1      14     14.0   14     0  
18 Manning               1      6      6.0    6      0  
  
Passing                  Att    Comp   Yards  Yd/Att Long   TD     Int  
18 Manning               38     24     265    6.9    19     4      1  
  
Receiving                Catch  Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
89 Owens                 6      65     10.8   14     2  
88 Schulters             6      62     10.3   19     2  
85 Halama                4      54     13.5   19     0
84 Green                 3      33     11.0   15     0  
22 Way                   2      15     7.5    8      0  
26 Patterson             2      19     9.5    10     0  
83 Gibson                1      17     17.0   17     0  
  
Punt Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
83 Gibson                2      20     10.0   0  
  
Kick Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
44 Whiting               3      56     18.6   0  
83 Gibson                2      42     21.0   0  
  
Punting                  Punts  Yards  Avg    Long   In20  
17 Smith                 2      81     40.5   44     1  
  
Kicking                  FG     FGA    Long   PAT    Att  
1 Clark                  0      1      0      4      4  
  
Defense                  Tackle Assist Sack   Int    IntYds IntTD  
35 Bishop                8      2      0.0    0      0      0  
43 Klinghagen            7      1      0.0    0      0      0  
59 Kennicott             6      4      0.0    1      27     0  
50 Saffitz               5      4      1.0    0      0      0  
90 Neill                 5      0      0.0    0      0      0  
96 Hurst                 3      3      1.0    0      0      0  
58 Flannery              3      2      0.0    0      0      0  
48 Parker                3      0      0.0    0      0      0  
28 Harper                2      2      0.0    0      0      0  
32 Hollier               2      0      0.0    0      0      0  
44 Whiting               1      1      0.0    0      0      0  
56 Christy               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
84 Green                 1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
54 Bayne                 1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
26 Patterson             1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
21 Argentati             1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
97 Peter                 0      1      0.0    0      0      0  
  
Miscellaneous            Fumb   Recov  MiscTD KeyRBlk SckAlwd  
79 Cheney                0      0      0      2      0  
22 Way                   0      0      0      0      1  
56 Christy               0      0      0      3      0  
77 Schlereth             0      0      0      1      0  
25 Williams              1      0      0      0      0  
63 Hastings              0      0      0      1      0  
26 Patterson             1      0      0      0      0  
72 Stevenson             0      0      0      1      0  
  
Iowa City Barnstormers Individual Statistics  
  
Rushing                  Att    Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
22 Lofton                20     76     3.8    27     0  
7 Roberts                7      40     5.7    7      0  
36 Reese                 3      12     4.0    11     0  
  
Passing                  Att    Comp   Yards  Yd/Att Long   TD     Int  
7 Roberts                36     19     295    8.1    42     3      1  
  
Receiving                Catch  Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
88 Ellison               7      114    16.2   32     1  
82 Baxter                3      27     9.0    16     0  
36 Reese                 3      65     21.6   42     2  
80 Wynn                  2      47     23.5   31     0  
87 Morris                1      11     11.0   11     0  
89 Reynolds              1      11     11.0   11     0  
37 Webster               1      9      9.0    9      0  
84 Bennett               1      11     11.0   11     0  
  
Punt Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
43 Patton                1      4      4.0    0  
  
Kick Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
43 Patton                3      62     20.6   0  
42 Shepherd              1      15     15.0   0  
  
Punting                  Punts  Yards  Avg    Long   In20  
15 Levine                4      147    36.7   45     0  

Kicking                  FG     FGA    Long   PAT    Att  
16 Lane                  3      3      39     2      2  
  
Defense                  Tackle Assist Sack   Int    IntYds IntTD  
58 Lodish                9      4      0.0    0      0      0  
30 Murphy                7      3      0.0    0      0      0  
28 Stith                 6      2      0.0    0      0      0  
52 Nord                  5      3      0.0    0      0      0  
59 Grier                 5      0      0.0    0      0      0  
45 Kotter                4      1      0.0    0      0      0  
94 Brown                 3      0      0.5    0      0      0  
90 Weaver                3      0      0.5    0      0      0  
98 Darlington            3      1      0.0    0      0      0  
50 Bonham                3      0      0.0    0      0      0  
42 Shepherd              2      1      0.0    1      0      0  
95 Malone                2      1      0.0    0      0      0  
20 Bartoszewicz          2      0      0.0    0      0      0  
56 Owens                 1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
79 Barnhardt             1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
41 Fuller                1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
21 Coady                 1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
71 Duffy                 1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
43 Patton                1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
  
Miscellaneous            Fumb   Recov  MiscTD KeyRBlk SckAlwd  
70 Morton                0      0      0      2      0  
78 Stewart               0      0      0      0      1  
63 Ray                   0      0      0      2      0  
79 Barnhardt             0      0      0      0      1  
56 Owens                 0      0      0      1      0  
30 Murphy                0      1      0      0      0  
59 Grier                 0      1      0      0      0  
36 Reese                 1      0      0      0      0  
71 Duffy                 0      0      0      1      0  
88 Ellison               0      1      0      0      0

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: December 12, 2007
Subject: Dr. Livingston Suicide
From: [email protected]

What's left of the remains is now here at FBI Headquarters. The medical examiner says he should have his report done in a couple weeks.

[Grid Iron]

Another Year, Another Loss

Jets cruise to 38-13 victory over Barnstormers

	Barnstormers (12-6)	13
	Jets (12-5)	38

December 14, 2007

Meadowlands, NJ (AP) – For the third straight year, the Iowa City Barnstormers ended their season with a loss in the divisional playoff, this time at the hands of the AFC East Champion New York Jets. “We played them tough in the first half,” said Barnstormers head coach Travis O’Donnell. “But they clobbered us in the second half.”

Trailing just 14-13 at the intermission, the Barnstormers completely fell apart in the game’s final 30 minutes, allowing the Jets to score 24 unanswered points and advance to the AFC Championship. New York running back Darrell Kreklow was unstoppable, rushing for 198 yards and two touchdowns.

“My guys played their hearts out this year,” said Iowa GM Jack “Grid” Iron. “We just never got into a rhythm on offense or defense.”

Box Score: Iowa City Barnstormers at New Jersey Jets.  
  
Attendance: 77,600 (89,700), No-Shows: 0.   
  
Weather: 41 degrees, rain.  
  
1Q: 11:40 NJY - Wayne Chrebet 21 pass from Derek Sonntag.  
1Q: 11:40 NJY - Ian Myers extra point.  
1Q: 07:32 IAC - Geoff Wynn 10 pass from Roman Roberts.  
1Q: 07:32 IAC - Jim Lane extra point.  
1Q: 05:50 IAC - Jim Lane 31 field goal.  
1Q: 02:29 NJY - Darrell Kreklow 6 run.  
1Q: 02:29 NJY - Ian Myers extra point.  
2Q: 00:23 IAC - Jim Lane 41 field goal.  
3Q: 10:13 NJY - Kirk Haldar 10 pass from Derek Sonntag.  
3Q: 10:13 NJY - Ian Myers extra point.  
3Q: 03:32 NJY - Wayne Chrebet 18 pass from Derek Sonntag.  
3Q: 03:32 NJY - Ian Myers extra point.  
4Q: 05:16 NJY - Darrell Kreklow 12 run.  
4Q: 05:16 NJY - Ian Myers extra point.  
4Q: 02:09 NJY - Ian Myers 36 field goal.  
  
Game MVP: NJY 32 Darrell Kreklow  
  
Iowa City         10     3      0      0      -      13  
New Jersey        14     0      14     10     -      38  
  
Team Statistics          IAC           NJY  
  
First Downs              16            28  
  
Rushes                   26            35  
Rushing Yards            100           277  
Yards Per Carry          3.8           7.9  
  
Pass Attempts            26            27  
Completions              13            18  
Passing Yards            152           217  
Yards Per Attempt        5.8           8.0  
Sacked                   11            1  
Yards Lost               63            14  
Net Passing Yards        89            203  
  
Interceptions            0             0  
Fumbles/Lost             2/1           2/2  
  
Total Plays              63            63  
Total Yards              189           480  
Yards Per Play           3.0           7.6  
  
3rd Down Plays           4/14          5/10  
  
Penalties                10            8  
Penalty Yards            47            49  
  
Time Of Possession       31:06         28:54  
  
Iowa City Barnstormers Individual Statistics  
  
Rushing                  Att    Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
22 Lofton                17     63     3.7    15     0  
7 Roberts                4      21     5.2    6      0  
37 Webster               4      14     3.5    15     0  
36 Reese                 1      2      2.0    2      0  
  
Passing                  Att    Comp   Yards  Yd/Att Long   TD     Int  
7 Roberts                25     13     152    6.0    33     1      0  
12 Brandon               1      0      0      0.0    0      0      0  
  
Receiving                Catch  Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
82 Baxter                3      27     9.0    10     0  
88 Ellison               3      38     12.6   19     0  
80 Wynn                  2      14     7.0    10     1  
22 Lofton                2      11     5.5    8      0  
87 Morris                2      29     14.5   17     0  
89 Reynolds              1      33     33.0   33     0 

Punt Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
43 Patton                1      -1     -1.0   0  
  
Kick Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
43 Patton                5      119    23.8   0  
24 George                1      14     14.0   0  
  
Punting                  Punts  Yards  Avg    Long   In20  
15 Levine                7      256    36.5   42     1  
  
Kicking                  FG     FGA    Long   PAT    Att  
16 Lane                  2      2      41     1      1  
  
Defense                  Tackle Assist Sack   Int    IntYds IntTD  
58 Lodish                8      3      0.0    0      0      0  
50 Bonham                7      0      0.0    0      0      0  
21 Coady                 6      1      0.0    0      0      0  
59 Grier                 5      0      0.0    0      0      0  
99 Greene                4      0      0.0    0      0      0  
52 Nord                  3      3      0.0    0      0      0  
47 Legge                 3      0      0.0    0      0      0  
94 Brown                 2      0      1.0    0      0      0  
98 Darlington            2      1      0.0    0      0      0  
30 Murphy                2      1      0.0    0      0      0  
45 Kotter                2      1      0.0    0      0      0  
43 Patton                2      0      0.0    0      0      0  
28 Stith                 2      0      0.0    0      0      0  
42 Shepherd              1      2      0.0    0      0      0  
80 Wynn                  1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
56 Owens                 1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
37 Webster               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
88 Ellison               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
90 Weaver                0      1      0.0    0      0      0  
  
Miscellaneous            Fumb   Recov  MiscTD KeyRBlk SckAlwd  
71 Duffy                 0      0      0      1      3  
70 Morton                0      0      0      2      0  
36 Reese                 0      0      0      0      1  
78 Stewart               0      0      0      1      2  
63 Ray                   0      0      0      0      2  
7 Roberts                2      0      0      0      0  
72 Towne                 0      0      0      0      1  
79 Barnhardt             0      0      0      2      2  
82 Baxter                0      1      0      0      0  
89 Reynolds              0      1      0      0      0  
45 Kotter                0      1      0      0      0  
  
New Jersey Jets Individual Statistics  
  
Rushing                  Att    Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
32 Kreklow               25     198    7.9    37     2  
8 Sonntag                3      24     8.0    11     0  
34 Connell               3      20     6.6    14     0  
25 Haldar                2      12     6.0    11     0  
5 Washington             1      -2     -2.0   -2     0  
20 Pehrson               1      25     25.0   25     0  
  
Passing                  Att    Comp   Yards  Yd/Att Long   TD     Int  
8 Sonntag                27     18     217    8.0    21     3      0  
5 Washington             0      0      0      0.0    0      0      0  
  
Receiving                Catch  Yards  Avg    Long   TD  
80 Chrebet               5      66     13.2   21     2  
86 Hartl                 4      49     12.2   16     0  
85 Hanson                3      29     9.6    11     0  
87 Malecki               2      24     12.0   15     0  
82 Parker                2      31     15.5   18     0  
25 Haldar                1      10     10.0   10     1  
32 Kreklow               1      8      8.0    8      0  
  
Punt Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
35 DiCosomo              2      3      1.5    0  
30 Canty                 1      13     13.0   0  
  
Kick Returns             Att    Yards  Avg    TD  
31 Glenn                 3      56     18.6   0 

Punting                  Punts  Yards  Avg    Long   In20  
2 Conway                 2      100    50.0   59     2  
  
Kicking                  FG     FGA    Long   PAT    Att  
6 Myers                  1      2      36     5      5  
  
Defense                  Tackle Assist Sack   Int    IntYds IntTD  
93 Shabowski             6      0      3.0    0      0      0  
52 Isaia                 5      0      0.0    0      0      0  
58 Constant              4      3      0.0    0      0      0  
48 Swift                 4      2      0.0    0      0      0  
31 Glenn                 4      1      0.0    0      0      0  
49 Small                 3      3      0.0    0      0      0  
53 Insley                3      2      0.0    0      0      0  
90 Hutchins              2      0      4.0    0      0      0  
30 Canty                 2      3      0.0    0      0      0  
41 Woodson               2      0      0.0    0      0      0  
24 Sellers               2      0      0.0    0      0      0  
96 Clemons               1      1      2.0    0      0      0  
98 Connell               1      0      1.0    0      0      0  
72 Ferguson              1      1      0.0    0      0      0  
79 Loverne               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
87 Malecki               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
35 DiCosomo              1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
20 Pehrson               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
34 Connell               1      0      0.0    0      0      0  
94 Baker                 0      0      0.5    0      0      0  
91 Ellard                0      0      0.5    0      0      0  
  
Miscellaneous            Fumb   Recov  MiscTD KeyRBlk SckAlwd  
79 Loverne               0      0      0      5      0  
69 Fabini                0      0      0      4      0  
77 Thomas                0      0      0      3      0  
68 Mawae                 0      0      0      1      1  
63 Quinn                 0      0      0      2      0  
96 Clemons               0      1      0      0      0  
31 Glenn                 1      0      0      0      0  
75 Tucker                0      0      0      1      0  
8 Sonntag                1      0      0      0      0

[Grid Iron]

Super Sonic!

Jets take Rams for ride

	Rams (13-6)	25
	Jets (14-5)	41

December 27, 2007

Meadowlands, NJ (Reuters) – The New York Jets racked up 503 yards of offense and held the Rams to just 158 in a 41-25 Super Bowl victory. Quarterback Derek Sonntag led the Jets’ offense, completing 22 of 36 for 266 yards, four touchdowns and just one interception.

[fantastic flying froggies]

I feel for the Barnstormers... Could it be time for a change in head coach, one with a highter motivation rating ? ...

[Grid Iron]

Shock Jock Rips Iowa

Fantastic Flying Froggies criticizes head coach

December 27, 2007

Iowa City, IA (AP) – Iowa City “Shock Jock” Fantastic Flying Froggies ripped Barnstormers management today, calling head coach Travis O’Donnell a “complete idiot in need of a full frontal lobotomy.” “I mean, how does this guy function in society?” asked Froggies on his morning sports show, loved across Iowa. “The Barnstormers are so much better than this,” he said referring to the team’s three consecutive losses in the Divisional Playoff. “With all that talent, it’s gotta be the coach.”

Froggies’ sentiments are felt by many Iowa fans who are feeling the frustration of the team crumbling under the pressure of big games. “We never win the big one to clinch the division or get to the AFC Championship,” Froggies complained. “I am calling on all fans to write, call and e-mail the Iowa Barnstormers and ask that O’Donnell be given the boot!”

In response to the verbal attack, team general manager Jack “Grid” Iron said he stood by his coach, who turned an expansion team into a perennial playoff contender in just five seasons. “Travis has done an outstanding job and I have no intention of firing him,” Iron said. “Our success is directly attributable to Travis’ outstanding work ethic.”

[fantastic flying froggies]

I'm honored...

[sterlingice]

I completely missed the start of another Grid Iron dynasty so I have a lot of reading to do. At least this won't be like the Blizzards where I only caught on for the last season.

SI

[Grid Iron]

Originally Posted by sterlingice

I completely missed the start of another Grid Iron dynasty so I have a lot of reading to do. At least this won't be like the Blizzards where I only caught on for the last season.

Welcome aboard! The meat of the story is just starting to kick into gear!

[Grid Iron]

Originally Posted by fantastic flying froggies

I'm honored...

I think I'm going to give Travis another two seasons. If we don't make it to the Conf. Champ by then, I'll have to start looking around.

[Grid Iron]

A.J. Patton Named MVP!

Chicago running back wins award for second year in row

December 28, 2007

Chicago, IL (ESPN) – Today, Chicago Bears running back A.J. Patton was named NFL MVP for the second consecutive year, as well as All-League Second Team. “I’m honored to win this award,” said Patton, whose team finished the year a disappointing 6-10. “But I’d give up all of my awards and honors for a Super Bowl ring.” On the year, Patton had 1,310 rushing yards, 532 receiving yards, and 14 touchdowns (12 rush, 2 rec). In just six seasons, A.J. has amassed 11,821 total yards and 95 touchdowns.

[Grid Iron]

2007 Barnstormers Report Card

December 30, 2007

Here is a rundown of Iowa City’s performance in 2007:

QUARTERBACKS: A

Roman Roberts, the first overall selection in the 2003 draft, is now considered among the NFL’s elite quarterbacks. He ranked third with 3,847 passing yards and second with 26 touchdown passes, both career highs. He threw just 11 interceptions and rushed for 444 yards and four touchdowns.

RUNNING BACKS: B

Friendship Lofton continued his improbable career. The fourth-round draft pick out of Florida State in 2003 ran for 1,131 yards and 10 touchdowns on the year. It was the third consecutive season in which he broke 1,000 yards rushing.

RECEIVERS: B+

Second-year wide receiver Jorge Ellison had a breakout year in his first season as the team’s starting split end. In just 14 games, Ellison led the Barnstormers with 62 catches and 925 receiving yards. He also scored six touchdowns, which was second only to tight end Freddie Morris. Morris, a second-round pick out of Eastern Michigan in 2003, was named All-League Second Team after recording career highs in receptions (52), receiving yards (603) and touchdowns (8). In addition, Morris excelled at run blocking, making 8 key run blocks in 18 opportunities for a 44.4 blocking percentage.

OFFENSIVE LINE: D+

Center Shannon Owens was the star of this otherwise weak unit, making 37 key run blocks in 111 opportunities for a 33.3 blocking percentage. As a whole, the line allowed 38 sacks during the regular season, which was tied for 17th in the league. In the playoffs, the unit allowed 11.0 sacks to the Jets in the Divisional Playoff.

DEFENSIVE LINE: A

The defensive line was awesome, recording 39 sacks and six fumble recoveries on the year. Three of the team’s four starting linemen had 10.0 or more sacks. Defensive end Stephen Bonham led the team with 12.5 sacks and also had four hurries, three fumble recoveries, and one blocked pass. Defensive tackle Cedric Brown, who signed a four-year $32.97 million contract with Iowa in the off season, paid dividends immediately by recording 12.0 sacks.

LINEBACKERS: C+

The Barnstormers linebacker corps was significantly improved from the previous year, as the team allowed only 111.8 rushing yards per game (12th). Fifth-year linebacker Chris Lodish led the team with 131 tackles (110 solo) and also had an interception.

SECONDARY: B+

The Barnstormers had the eighth-best pass defense in the league (207.1 yds/game), due in large part to a great secondary. Anchored by 2005 Defensive Player of the Year Gilbert Coady at free safety, this unit ranked 8th in the NFL with 21 interceptions. Rookie cornerback Luther Shepherd led the team with four picks.

SPECIAL TEAMS: B+

Place kicker Jim Lane had a fantastic year, making 29 of 36 (81%) of his field goal attempts with a long of 56. Punter Junior Levine was one of the best, dropping 36 of his 87 punts (41%) inside the 20.

COACHING: B+

Coach Travis O’Donnell did another great job, making the playoffs for a fourth consecutive year. However, the team’s failure to win a division title or get to the AFC Championship in that time span may eventually put his job in jeopardy. In addition, the team ranked fifth in penalties (127) and penalty yards (911).

[Grid Iron]

Stay tuned for the season finale, coming up next!

[Grid Iron]

FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION

Medical Examiner's Report

To: Tom Coleman, Special Agent

From: Harvey Winthrop, M.E.

Date: December 31, 2007

Re: Tim Livingston Suicide Investigation, Case #07-432

I was instructed to conduct a medical examination of the subject, Tim Livingston. The body was recently exhumed and is in a decayed state. Only the torso and head are intact; both parts have been severely burned. Dental records dating back 20 years confirm that the body is that of Dr. Tim Livingston.

The death was originally ruled a suicide by a single gunshot wound to the head on December 31, 2006. While I agree as to the means of death, I believe the originally reported time of death is incorrect. In my opinion, this subject died of a single gunshot wound approximately three years ago in Peru.

Below are the findings that support my opinion:

1. The skull reveals a single gunshot wound to the right side of the skull at the temple.
   
   
2. The entry wound is consistent with the firearm being placed flush against the head when fired; caliber is probably .45.
   
   
3. Examination of the stomach was normal, except that I found a few microscopic particles of digested food.
   
   
4. An analysis of the food particles revealed that the particles had several clusters of bacteria growing on them. Essentially microscopic "hitchhikers."
   
   
5. This type of bacteria is commonly found in South America, and not in the United States.
   
   
6. Further, this strain of bacteria, spread via house flies, is found only in decaying corpses or on rotting meat, not live animals.
   
   
7. A photo-laser analysis of the bacteria growth reveals that the colony is approximately three years old.
   
   
8. Since the bacteria is approximately three years old, the subject must have been killed at least three years ago.
   
   
9. Records reveal that Dr. Livingston travelled to South America in the Fall of 2004 to teach at the University of Peru.
   
   
10. Records and interviews reveal that Dr. Livingston had never travelled to South America before that time, or returned subsequent to that trip.
    

Based on these findings, I believe the body recovered from Dr. Livingston's home on December 31, 2006, was already dead before that time. This raises a disturbing question.

Since the body found at the scene is most definitely Dr. Livingston, and Dr. Livingston died three years ago, who was it working for NASA over the last three years as the doctor?

Unfortunately, I do not have an answer.

If you would like any additional information, please do not hesitate to call.

[Grid Iron]

To: [email protected]
Date: December 31, 2007
Subject: I'm Back!!!
From: [email protected]

Well, the surgery went great and I've got my face back. Livingston was a good looking man, but nothing compared to me.

If anything, I'm glad to finally be rid of that damn body. It was taking up all the room in my freezer.

I got your message and I will meet you at the arranged time and place, per your instructions, for my next assignment. Sounds interesting . . .

[Ragone]

Man, you need to do something about your offensive line.. or else gonna have to start equipping trainers with spatula's to scrape roman off the turf

[Grid Iron]

Originally Posted by Ragone

Man, you need to do something about your offensive line.. or else gonna have to start equipping trainers with spatula's to scrape roman off the turf

Agreed. Roman gets sacked about 2.38 times per game during the regular season and 11.0 times during the Divisional Playoff!!! Sheesh, that's gotta be some kinda record.

O-line help is definitely a top priority going into the offseason.

[Grid Iron]

This is the end of the 2007 season. The 2008 season begins here!