Email for the Isolationists

[Fritz]

As many of you know, I am a supporter of agressive foreign policy and real politic diplomacy. That said, e-mails like the one I received below make my skin crawl.

Does anyone here subscribe to the thoughts below?

*please note, if this thread devolves into a Bush-Kerry thing I will delete it.

Regardless of your political persuasion, WOULDN'T IT
BE GREAT TO TURN ON THE TV AND HEAR GEORGE
W. BUSH OR JOHN KERRY GIVE THE FOLLOWING
SPEECH?

My Fellow Americans:
As you all know, the defeat of the Iraq regime has
been completed. Since congress does not want to
spend any more money on this war, our mission in
Iraq is complete.

This morning I gave the order for a complete removal
of all American forces from Iraq. This action will be
complete within 30 days. It is now time to begin the
reckoning.

Before me, I have two lists. One list contains the
names of countries which have stood by our side
during the Iraq conflict. This list is short. The United
Kingdom, Spain, Bulgaria, Australia, and Poland are
some of the countries listed there.

The other list contains everyone not on the first list.
Most of the worlds nations are on that list. My press
secretary will be distributing copies of both lists later
this evening.

Let me start by saying that effective immediately,
foreign aid to those nations on List 2 ceases
immediately and indefinitely. The money saved during
the first year alone will pretty much pay for the costs
of the Iraqi war.

The American people are no longer going to pour
money into third world Hell-holes and watch those
government leaders grow fat on corruption.

Need help with a famine? Wrestling with an epidemic?
Call France. In the future, together with Congress, I
will work to redirect this money toward solving the
vexing social problems we still have at home. On that
note, a word to terrorist organizations. Screw with us
and we will hunt you down and eliminate you and all
your friends from the face of the earth. Thirsting for a
gutsy country to terrorize? Try France, or maybe
China.

To Israel and the Palestinian Authority. Yo, boys. Work
out a peace deal NOW. Just note that Camp David is
closed. Maybe all of you can go to Russia for
negotiations. They have some great palaces there. Big
tables, too. I am ordering the immediate severing of
diplomatic relations with France, Germany, and
Russia. Thanks for all your help, comrades. We are
retiring from NATO as well. Bon chance, mes amis. I
have instructed the Mayor of New York City to begin
towing the many UN diplomatic vehicles located in
Manhattan with more than two unpaid
parking tickets to sites where those vehicles will be
stripped, shredded and crushed. I don't care about
whatever treaty pertains to this. You creeps have tens
of thousands of unpaid tickets. Pay those tickets
tomorrow or watch your precious Benzes, Beamers,
and limos be turned over to some of the finest chop
shops in the world. I love New York.

A special note to our neighbors. Canada is on List 2.
Since we are likely to be seeing a lot more of each
other, you folks might want to try not pissing us off
for a change. Mexico is also on List 2. President Fox
and his entire corrupt government really need an
attitude adjustment. I will have a couple extra tank
and infantry divisions sitting around. Guess where I
am going to put em? Yep, border security. So start
doing something with your oil. Oh, by the way, the
United States is abrogating the NAFTA treaty ---
starting now.

We are tired of the one-way highway. It is time for
America to focus on its own welfare and its own
citizens. Some will accuse us of isolationism. I answer
them be saying, "darn tootin."

Nearly a century of trying to help folks live a decent
life around the world has only earned us the undying
enmity of just about everyone on the planet. It is time
to eliminate hunger in America. It is time to eliminate
homelessness in America. It is also time to eliminate
World Cup Soccer from America.

To the nations on List 1, a final thought. Thanks guys.
We owe you and we won't forget. To the nations on
List 2, a final thought. Drop dead.

God bless America. Thank you and good night.


If you can read this, thank a teacher.

If you are reading it in English, thank a soldier !

[WSUCougar]

Good for a chuckle.

[stevew]

um http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/for...mplete+removal

[Fritz]

well, I didn't read that thread and its not on the front page.

[Ksyrup]

Originally Posted by Fritz

well, I didn't read that thread and its not on the front page.

Then I guess it doesn't exist.

[Crapshoot]

Fritz- there were a couple of idiots who thought it was a good idea..

[Schmidty]

Bush!!!!

[Schmidty]

No Kerry, you fuck-ass!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[WSUCougar]

Originally Posted by Schmidty

I'll be voting for Michael Dukakis