Ebert Says ---- Thumbs Down

rkmsuf · 11-09-2004, 10:59 AM

Nichols Removes Portman's Nude Scenes

Actress Natalie Portman ordered director Mike Nichols to remove her full frontal nude scenes from her latest movie Closer - despite playing a stripper in the film. Nichols is very protective of the 23-year-old beauty and agreed the topless footage was acceptable, but decided raunchy shots of her fully nude were gratuitous and should be deleted from the drama. Portman explains, "He wants to see my bare ass much less than (even) my father would. He's as or more protective of me than my parents are. So doing sexual, physical stuff for him felt very uncomfortable."

Suicane75 · 11-09-2004, 11:01 AM

It doesn't matter, in this day and age in about 2 months simply googling "Natalie Portman" will reveal all.....and I mean all.....Mmmmm.

Cringer · 11-09-2004, 11:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rkmsuf

but decided raunchy shots of her fully nude were gratuitous and should be deleted from the drama.

Thats IS the point! If it was not for gratuitous nudity I wouldn't watch 1/3 of the movies I do....

WSUCougar · 11-09-2004, 11:06 AM

Estimated time to Kodos/kleenex scenario...3 minutes.

rkmsuf · 11-09-2004, 11:07 AM

what a scam...yeah, let's shoot some full frontal and see how we like it.

Suicane75 · 11-09-2004, 11:09 AM

The thing I don't get, she's playing a stripper, of course she should be fully naked and we should see it. It's like, for christs sakes, you accept the role of a stripper and then complain when the movie includes scenes of you fully naked. Put on a friggin burka already you dumb bitch.

DanGarion · 11-09-2004, 11:10 AM

Natalie Portman is like... hawt!

sovereignstar · 11-09-2004, 11:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Suicane75

The thing I don't get, she's playing a stripper, of course she should be fully naked and we should see it. It's like, for christs sakes, you accept the role of a stripper and then complain when the movie includes scenes of you fully naked. Put on a friggin burka already you dumb bitch.

Hey! Watch who you're calling a bitch, mister. Someday me and Natalie are going to get married.

Kodos · 11-09-2004, 11:14 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WSUCougar

Estimated time to Kodos/kleenex scenario...3 minutes.

I've already used up all the kleenex because of the news out of Miami.

WSUCougar · 11-09-2004, 11:15 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sovereignstar

Hey! Watch who you're calling a bitch, mister. Someday me and Natalie are going to get married.

So does that mean you'll become King of Naboo?

rkmsuf · 11-09-2004, 11:16 AM

I know haircut day is pretty cool but is there anything better than full frontal day on the movie production schedule?

Suicane75 · 11-09-2004, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sovereignstar

Hey! Watch who you're calling a bitch, mister. Someday me and Natalie are going to get married.

Me: So Sov, how did the honeymoon go?
Sov: She insisted on wearing a snow suit to bed and said that my junk was icky.
Me: Bitch.

WSUCougar · 11-09-2004, 11:16 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kodos

I've already used up all the kleenex because of the news out of Miami.

Dear Abby,

I know this guy - well, he's more like an alien creature - who masturbates over Dave Wannstedt. Any advice I should give him?

Thanks,

Troubled in FOFC

cuervo72 · 11-09-2004, 11:34 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by WSUCougar

Dear Abby,

I know this guy - well, he's more like an alien creature - who masturbates over Dave Wannstedt. Any advice I should give him?

Thanks,

Troubled in FOFC

Try to avoid the moustache...that stuff is hard to get out.

tanglewood · 11-09-2004, 11:51 AM

That noise you hear is the faint sound of box office sales flying out the window.

rkmsuf · 11-09-2004, 11:54 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by tanglewood

That noise you hear is the faint sound of box office sales flying out the window.

The DVD with the deleted scenes will make up for that.

CHEMICAL SOLDIER · 11-09-2004, 12:00 PM

I heard Natalie Portman was a 23 year old virgin.....seriously......Well more power to her.

rkmsuf · 11-09-2004, 12:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by CHEMICAL SOLDIER

I heard Natalie Portman was a 23 year old virgin.....seriously......Well more power to her.

Not for long. I hear Annikan is going to pork her.

Castlerock · 11-09-2004, 12:29 PM

Back when Natalie Portman was a freshman she sat in the row in front of me at the movie theater in Harvard Square. She was with some guy and was totally mauling him. I don't remember which movie it was but she didn't watch much of it.

Draft Dodger · 11-09-2004, 12:32 PM

I was all excited for the recent Neve Campbell nude scene, but it turned out to be quite lame

so, I guess I'm not holding my breath, even though I'd love to bang Natalie Portman.

Desnudo · 11-09-2004, 01:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rkmsuf

So doing sexual, physical stuff for him felt very uncomfortable."

Selfish bastard. This isn't about him.

Raiders Army · 11-09-2004, 01:32 PM

This is the funniest non-politcal thread I've read in a while. Thanks fellas.

rkmsuf · 11-09-2004, 01:33 PM

Quote:

So doing sexual, physical stuff for him felt very uncomfortable."

...in front of the camera. I had no problem in the trailer.

Desnudo · 11-09-2004, 01:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Castlerock

Back when Natalie Portman was a freshman she sat in the row in front of me at the movie theater in Harvard Square. She was with some guy and was totally mauling him. I don't remember which movie it was but she didn't watch much of it.

If she was making out in movie theaters in college, maybe she is still a virgin. She sure acted as frigid as one in Star Wars.

Flasch186 · 11-09-2004, 03:09 PM

WAsn't she hot in Beautiful Girls though...I think she was 13 in that. Me and Timothy Hutton sitting in a car going, "what the fuck's the matter with me. She's like 13!!.....but SHIT, she's so hot." Not good.

Desnudo · 11-09-2004, 03:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flasch186

WAsn't she hot in Beautiful Girls though...I think she was 13 in that. Me and Timothy Hutton sitting in a car going, "what the fuck's the matter with me. She's like 13!!.....but SHIT, she's so hot." Not good.

I thought she was a little Lolita in The Professional when she was 11. It's like she's gotten less sexual as she's grown up.

DeToxRox · 11-09-2004, 03:27 PM

Roepert is reporting that Mike Nichols replaced all full frontal nudity with a body double .. Unfortunatley it was Haley Joel Osmond

Flasch186 · 11-09-2004, 03:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desnudo

I thought she was a little Lolita in The Professional when she was 11. It's like she's gotten less sexual as she's grown up.

If that isn't absolutely disgusting. Those green striped shorts and the 'wife beater'. C'mon. That is not hot. BUT when she dolled up like Marilyn....I take it all back. HAWT!

Desnudo · 11-09-2004, 03:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Flasch186

If that isn't absolutely disgusting. Those green striped shorts and the 'wife beater'. C'mon. That is not hot. BUT when she dolled up like Marilyn....I take it all back. HAWT!

It wasn't how she was dressed, it was how she was acting. You can't teach that kind of sexy. Same deal in Beautiful Girls.

You like green shorts:

http://homepage.ntlworld.com/markcar...ages/plant.jpg

DanGarion · 11-09-2004, 03:52 PM

Have you seen the trailer for this new movie? She's looking good, all dressed in her Sunday's best bra and panties.

JeeberD · 11-09-2004, 05:11 PM

Since we won't be able to see Natalie's goodies, how about Anne Hathaway's goodies instead?

Quote:

I refused to believe it when I first heard about it, but it's 100% true: Anne Hathaway shows off her ENTIRE body in this movie. I saw an advanced screening in Texas, and let me tell you, it's mind blowing. Only 15 minutes into it, young Anne is being felt up by an LA gangbanger and off comes her top. Her breasts are large with big, pink nipples. The lucky guy gets to suck on them for a minute. Later on, she gets out of bed fully nude to answer the door. You don't see much pubic action here, but there is a long, well-lit view of her behind. Half way through the movie is the scene that will probably ruin her career, at least with Disney. She pleasures herself with a vibrator in front of a group of onlookers. I was just expecting a quick muff-shot, but you see LIPS! There's no insertion shot, but that doesn't matter. I don't know about you, but I'm not used to seeing actual vagina in a Hollywood movie, just pubic hair (Anne's is very well-trimmed, BTW. So her reign as a princess is over. She is now Hollywood's new skin queen.

Desnudo · 11-09-2004, 05:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by JeeberD

Since we won't be able to see Natalie's goodies, how about Anne Hathaway's goodies instead?

I got this from a user review of Havoc, Hathaway's movie, on IMDb:

"Aside from the unrealistic story line, laughable script,and pathetic actors, the movie as I mentioned above, follows the lines of a porno. I have never seen so much female nudity, and sex scenes. What boggles me most is that there is so much nudity of what your supposed to believe to be underage kids. The most horrible scene that makes you sick to your stomach is Phillips getting initiated into a mexican gang, shows her, quite visually, having sex with two men at once. Everything else in the movie seems to follow that same vulgar line."

Now maybe I'm more jaded than the reviewer, but I think I could handle watching Bijou Phillips get double-teamed by two Mexican gang members.

sabotai · 11-09-2004, 05:28 PM

vulgar = good. When will people learn that!?

sovereignstar · 11-09-2004, 05:31 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by gay imdb reviewer

"The most horrible scene that makes you sick to your stomach is Phillips getting initiated into a mexican gang, shows her, quite visually, having sex with two men at once. Everything else in the movie seems to follow that same vulgar line."

Oh no she didn't girlfriennnnnd! That's just a no-no! The last time I saw a poor, brittle girl getting gang-banged I sat there and bit my pillow. Ridiculous!

Remember, pastels are in and shave WITH the grain! WITH the grain...

Schmidty · 11-09-2004, 05:34 PM

Natalie Portman has the body of a twelve-year-old.

Blech.

DeToxRox · 11-09-2004, 05:53 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desnudo

Now maybe I'm more jaded than the reviewer, but I think I could handle watching Bijou Phillips get double-teamed by two Mexican gang members.

hell, i think i can handle watching skydog get double-teamed by two mexican gang members ..

... but only because i preach diversity

DanGarion · 11-09-2004, 06:40 PM

Mmmm Anne Hathaway...

DeToxRox · 11-09-2004, 06:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by dangarion

Mmmm Anne Hathaway...

drooool... anferney hardaway

Buccaneer · 11-09-2004, 06:48 PM

You kids are funny.

Draft Dodger · 11-09-2004, 07:09 PM

I must be old. I have no clue who Anne Hathaway or Bijou Philips is

cuervo72 · 11-09-2004, 07:21 PM

Princess Diaries for the first. Not sure what Philips is famous for more than her lineage.

cthomer5000 · 11-09-2004, 07:24 PM

Anne Hathaway damn hot.

Draft Dodger · 11-09-2004, 07:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cuervo72

Princess Diaries for the first. Not sure what Philips is famous for more than her lineage.

Princess Diaries?
sorry, man, I'm straight.

cuervo72 · 11-09-2004, 07:42 PM

Kids movie...if you watch any Disney Channel, you can't help but see commercials for it.

(and if you see the commercials, you think "hey...she's pretty cute")

Suicane75 · 11-09-2004, 10:26 PM

Theres a whole slew of "teenage" actors and actresses who seem to live making these below the radar, pretentious, shock value low budget self indulgent borefests. I can guarantee you that if Bijou Phillips, Brad Renfro or Dominique Swain are in a movie it's gonna involve gratuitous sex and self important dialog and generaly take itself more serious than it has any right to. I feel bad that this is the road that Anne Hathaway is taking because she seems to be a pretty decent actress and It's a shame that this is the road shes taking with her career.

As an aside, Chers son Elijah Blue was on the Stern show about a year or so ago, and Stern was going on and on about how cool it must be to get Bijou Phillips at which point Elijah cooly and calmy says, "Eh, it's 3 O'clock slop", I still laugh at that line everytime I see some self important blurb about the non entity that is Bijou Phillips.
F' em all

WSUCougar · 11-09-2004, 10:39 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Draft Dodger

I must be old. I have no clue who Anne Hathaway or Bijou Philips is

Ms. Hathaway is in the back row, middle:

cuervo72 · 11-09-2004, 10:46 PM

Yep, right there next to Mr. Drysdale.

Draft Dodger · 11-09-2004, 10:47 PM

but that Miss Hathaway was a lesbian, right?

cuervo72 · 11-09-2004, 11:06 PM

Mmm, yep! (it did seem odd that she was always going around in a boy scouts outfit)

Funny thing...I had a friend in college (who was gay) who always reminded me of Miss Hathaway for whatever reason.

CHEMICAL SOLDIER · 11-10-2004, 12:23 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Castlerock

Back when Natalie Portman was a freshman she sat in the row in front of me at the movie theater in Harvard Square. She was with some guy and was totally mauling him. I don't remember which movie it was but she didn't watch much of it.

How do you know it was her it could have been a body doubleor something.

11-09-2004, 11:06 AM	#4
WSUCougar Rider Of Rohan Join Date: Jul 2001 Location: Port Angeles, WA or Helm's Deep	Estimated time to Kodos/kleenex scenario...3 minutes. __________________ It's not the years...it's the mileage.

11-09-2004, 11:07 AM	#5
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	what a scam...yeah, let's shoot some full frontal and see how we like it. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

11-09-2004, 11:10 AM	#7
DanGarion Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: PNW	Natalie Portman is like... hawt! __________________ Los Angeles Dodgers Check out the FOFC Groups on Facebook! and Reddit! DON'T REPORT ME BRO!

11-09-2004, 11:16 AM	#11
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	I know haircut day is pretty cool but is there anything better than full frontal day on the movie production schedule? __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

11-09-2004, 12:00 PM	#17
CHEMICAL SOLDIER College Starter Join Date: Jul 2002 Location: Henderson, Nevada	I heard Natalie Portman was a 23 year old virgin.....seriously......Well more power to her. __________________ Toujour Pret

11-09-2004, 11:01 AM	#2
Suicane75 Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: NJ	It doesn't matter, in this day and age in about 2 months simply googling "Natalie Portman" will reveal all.....and I mean all.....Mmmmm.

11-09-2004, 11:09 AM	#6
Suicane75 Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: NJ	The thing I don't get, she's playing a stripper, of course she should be fully naked and we should see it. It's like, for christs sakes, you accept the role of a stripper and then complain when the movie includes scenes of you fully naked. Put on a friggin burka already you dumb bitch.

11-09-2004, 11:51 AM	#15
tanglewood College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2004	That noise you hear is the faint sound of box office sales flying out the window.

11-09-2004, 12:29 PM	#19
Castlerock High School Varsity Join Date: Jun 2002 Location: Boston, Ma	Back when Natalie Portman was a freshman she sat in the row in front of me at the movie theater in Harvard Square. She was with some guy and was totally mauling him. I don't remember which movie it was but she didn't watch much of it.

11-09-2004, 12:32 PM	#20
Draft Dodger Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Keene, NH	I was all excited for the recent Neve Campbell nude scene, but it turned out to be quite lame so, I guess I'm not holding my breath, even though I'd love to bang Natalie Portman. __________________ Mile High Hockey

11-09-2004, 01:32 PM	#22
Raiders Army Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Black Hole	This is the funniest non-politcal thread I've read in a while. Thanks fellas.

11-09-2004, 03:09 PM	#25
Flasch186 Coordinator Join Date: May 2002 Location: Jacksonville, FL	WAsn't she hot in Beautiful Girls though...I think she was 13 in that. Me and Timothy Hutton sitting in a car going, "what the fuck's the matter with me. She's like 13!!.....but SHIT, she's so hot." Not good. __________________ Jacksonville-florida-homes-for-sale Putting a New Spin on Real Estate! ----------------------------------------------------------- Commissioner of the USFL USFL

11-09-2004, 03:27 PM	#27
DeToxRox Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Michigan	Roepert is reporting that Mike Nichols replaced all full frontal nudity with a body double .. Unfortunatley it was Haley Joel Osmond

11-09-2004, 03:52 PM	#30
DanGarion Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: PNW	Have you seen the trailer for this new movie? She's looking good, all dressed in her Sunday's best bra and panties. __________________ Los Angeles Dodgers Check out the FOFC Groups on Facebook! and Reddit! DON'T REPORT ME BRO!

11-09-2004, 05:28 PM	#33
sabotai General Manager Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Satellite of Love	vulgar = good. When will people learn that!?

11-09-2004, 05:34 PM	#35
Schmidty Coordinator Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Early, TX	Natalie Portman has the body of a twelve-year-old. Blech. __________________ Just beat the devil out of it!!! - Bob Ross

11-09-2004, 06:40 PM	#37
DanGarion Coordinator Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: PNW	Mmmm Anne Hathaway... __________________ Los Angeles Dodgers Check out the FOFC Groups on Facebook! and Reddit! DON'T REPORT ME BRO!

11-09-2004, 06:48 PM	#39
Buccaneer Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Colorado	You kids are funny.

11-09-2004, 07:09 PM	#40
Draft Dodger Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Keene, NH	I must be old. I have no clue who Anne Hathaway or Bijou Philips is __________________ Mile High Hockey Last edited by Draft Dodger : 11-09-2004 at 07:10 PM.

11-09-2004, 07:21 PM	#41
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Princess Diaries for the first. Not sure what Philips is famous for more than her lineage. __________________ null

11-09-2004, 07:42 PM	#44
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Kids movie...if you watch any Disney Channel, you can't help but see commercials for it. (and if you see the commercials, you think "hey...she's pretty cute") __________________ null

11-09-2004, 10:26 PM	#45
Suicane75 Coordinator Join Date: Sep 2003 Location: NJ	Theres a whole slew of "teenage" actors and actresses who seem to live making these below the radar, pretentious, shock value low budget self indulgent borefests. I can guarantee you that if Bijou Phillips, Brad Renfro or Dominique Swain are in a movie it's gonna involve gratuitous sex and self important dialog and generaly take itself more serious than it has any right to. I feel bad that this is the road that Anne Hathaway is taking because she seems to be a pretty decent actress and It's a shame that this is the road shes taking with her career. As an aside, Chers son Elijah Blue was on the Stern show about a year or so ago, and Stern was going on and on about how cool it must be to get Bijou Phillips at which point Elijah cooly and calmy says, "Eh, it's 3 O'clock slop", I still laugh at that line everytime I see some self important blurb about the non entity that is Bijou Phillips. F' em all

11-09-2004, 10:46 PM	#47
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Yep, right there next to Mr. Drysdale. __________________ null

11-09-2004, 10:47 PM	#48
Draft Dodger Coordinator Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Keene, NH	but that Miss Hathaway was a lesbian, right? __________________ Mile High Hockey

11-09-2004, 11:06 PM	#49
cuervo72 Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2002 Location: Maryland	Mmm, yep! (it did seem odd that she was always going around in a boy scouts outfit) Funny thing...I had a friend in college (who was gay) who always reminded me of Miss Hathaway for whatever reason. __________________ null

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