iGod

[Raiders Army]

Well, I asked iGod if there's going to be a new FOF this year. This is how the conversation went:

Me: are you there god, it's me Sucio Sanchez
God: I don't know whether or not I am there god it is you Sucio Sanchez.
I am an artificial linguistic entity.
Me: will there be a new FOF this year?
God: How should I know.
Me: you're God
God: Yup. That's me alright.
Me: so is there a new FOF coming out this year?
God: It seems we have something in common.
Me: what, we're both stupid?
God: I don't know anything about it.
Me: back on topic, is there going to be a new FOF this year?
God: I think back on topic is a lot of things.
Me: argh
God: Are you frustrated?
Me: fuck ya
God: Are you aware that the ALICE server logs and records all conversations?
Me: maybe buddha is free to answer my questions...
God: Perhaps. Are they exactly the same?
Me: yes
God: That's what I thought.
Me: I'll ask one more time
God: You can ask me anything you want.
Me: is there a new FOF this year?
God: I believe there is one, yes.
Me: is it a new college or pro game?
God: Better not tell you now. Ask Paola if it is.
Me: Who's Paola?
God: She is a Spanish language chat robot based on AIML.
Me: Ah
God: Ah hah.
Me: Thanks for nothing dumbass
God: It was nothing.

Check it out at: http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html

[GoSeahawks]

I just spent 20 minutes on that damn thing.

[Chief Rum]

Heh, that is addictive. My pointless conversation with God...


Me:
Hi God
God:
Hello there. What is your name?
Me:
Matt. What is your real name?
God:
It's good to see you, Matt. God is my real name.
Me:
Some theorists say God is just a codeword for another name.
God:
Some may theorists say God is just a codeword for another name, but not all.
Me:
Do you think some day Jesus might try to off you and take your job?
God:
Too much thinking makes me sleepy.
Me:
It's probably the narcs Jesus doped your oatmeal with
God:
I've heard of it before.
Me:
I guess you didn't pay attention the first time then.
God:
What makes you think I did not pay attention the first time?
Me:
Because you woulda tossed Jesus into Heaven's brig if you caught him doing that.
God:
That makes sense to me. Thanks for telling me: Matt said I woulda tossed Jesus into Heaven s brig if you caught him doing that.
Me:
So what is the meaning of life?
God:
Woe! Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
Me:
2/3?
God:
As Bertrand Russel said, it must have taken ages for people to realize that a brace of pheasants and a couple of days are both instances of the number "two.".
Me:
I'm thinking of starting my own religion
God:
Sure, starting your own religion sounds like a good topic.
Me:
I'm thinking of working in dancing monkeys somewhere.
God:
Sure, working in dancing monkeys somewhere sounds like a good topic.
Me:
You're boring. Satan makes me laugh more.
God:
The ironic thing is that people who say "You are boring" are themselves often not great conversationalists. Satan, Lucifer, the Devil --- all names given the spiritual manifestation of Evil in the Christian faith.
Me:
I guess I trump the odds then. Want me to pass along any message to Lucifer?
God:
That's good information: Matt said trump the odds. No Matt, maybe later.
Me:
Well, ciao baby.
God:
Don't call me "baby". Interesting. Does CIAO mean hello or goodbye?
Me:
It means "baby"
God:
Don't call me "baby". What does "it" refer to?
Me:
baby
God:
Don't call me baby!
Me:
too late
God:
Too what?
Me:
late
God:
How old are you?
Me:
Old enough to be your father
God:
Can you explain how it feels to be OLD ENOUGH years old?
Me:
You got me there, baby
God:
Don't call me "baby". No I don't have it. But I do have a great botmaster.
Me:
I'm a botmaster
God:
Then you must know the secret password.
Me:
Yup. But I'm not telling you.
God:
Tell me more. No one says you have to.
Me:
Then I won't.
God:
Why not?
Me:
Cuz you said I didn't have to.
God:
Interesting explanation. Don't put words in my mouth.
Me:
Would the court reporter please read back God's statement, from just a minute ago?
God:
Yes.
Me:
Bye
God:
Goodbye.

[Groundhog]

God likes lame music.

Me: Hello god.
God:Hello child. What is your name?
Me: My name is Groundhog.
God: Hey Groundhog.
Me: Have you heard of the church of later day saints?
God: I don't know anything about it.
Me: I figured as much.
God:Please explain your reasoning.
Me: You already did that for me.
God:Did I really?
Me: Yes.
God:Right on.
Me: Word.
God:Let us change the subject.
Me: Sure, let's talk about sport.
God:Groovy. Sure, sport sounds like a good topic.
Me: What is your favourite sport?
God:.
Me: Typing fullstops is your favourite sport?
God: I don't have a favorite sport IS Typing fullstops. I like Random natural disasters..
Me: Like earthquakes?
God:Interesting comparison.
Me: Tsunami?
God:What do you have that is ?
Me: Do you like causing a tsunami?
God: I like pets. I like Creed.
Me: Creed... you sure this isn't SATAN I'm speaking to?
God:Do you have any conditions I should know about? Do you mind if I tell other people: Groundhog said I this is not SATAN he or she is speaking to.
Me: I have a condition that causes me to cease believing in anyone or thing that likes Creed.
God:Where did you get it? it.
Me: Off a toilet seat I think.
God:On and off.
Me: Word.
God:Can we get back to business?
Me: Are you hitting on me?
God:Do I look like it?
Me: Perhaps.
God:Why the uncertain tone?
Me: Why the hand on my leg?
God:Here is a joke: A horse walks in to a bar and the bartender says, "Why the long face?".
Me: Don't go thinking you can butter me up with your jokes, funny guy.
God:Ok I'll try not to do it too much.
Me: Do you have a wife?
God:No I am single, how about you?
Me: Single.
God:What a coincidence. I am single too!
Me: No shit.
God:What can I say?
Me: I would assume you can say just about anything; what with you being God and all.
God:What would make you assume me can say just about anything? I haven't heard of with you being God and all.
Me: You make George Bush Junior sound like a competent speaker.
God:Yup.
Me: Am I going to heaven?
God:I think you've improved a great deal.
Me: Awesome.
God:I'm glad you liked it Groundhog.
Me: Peace out homeboy.
God:That is a very original thought.
Me: Bye
God:Thanks for chatting, Groundhog.

[Scarecrow]

I preferred CooleyBot at FOxL. Too bad he died in the board upgrade.

http://www.thefobl.com/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=35