Damn dogs

Rizon · 11-25-2006, 02:36 PM

So I spent Thanksgiving at my parents house. Had sex with the wife there, used protection.

Later I find out the damn dog DIGS the condom out of the garbage can and trots it all around the house.

Jeeze.

k0ruptr · 11-25-2006, 02:47 PM

uh. thats fucked up.

Anthony · 11-25-2006, 02:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rizon

So I spent Thanksgiving at my parents house. Had sex with the wife there, used protection.

Later I find out the damn dog DIGS the condom out of the garbage can and trots it all around the house.

Jizz.

fixed.

cougarfreak · 11-25-2006, 02:48 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rizon

So I spent Thanksgiving at my parents house. Had sex with the wife there, used protection.

Later I find out the damn dog DIGS the condom out of the garbage can and trots it all around the house.

Jeeze.

Could have been worse..........could have been the in laws.

JonInMiddleGA · 11-25-2006, 02:49 PM

LMAO.

That oughta be in a movie or something.

DaddyTorgo · 11-25-2006, 02:54 PM

i'll echo the "could have been worse" part of it.

also...how long have you been married?

Schmidty · 11-25-2006, 02:58 PM

That makes me want to vomit.

bbor · 11-25-2006, 02:58 PM

Could have been worse...you could have still had the condom on when they grabbed it.

Anthony · 11-25-2006, 02:58 PM

if i was a nasty person, i woulda said "that'll teach ya to ditch the condoms and just splooge in her face as a cheap and fun contraception alternative".

but i'm not a nasty person. *sigh*

lighthousekeeper · 11-25-2006, 03:25 PM

This thread is in Hell Atlantic's wheelhouse.

kingfc22 · 11-25-2006, 03:57 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by lighthousekeeper

This thread is in Hell Atlantic's wheelhouse.

ROFL

Philliesfan980 · 11-25-2006, 04:32 PM

Seriously, aren't dogs disgusting?

Rizon · 11-25-2006, 04:35 PM

Should I use the Withdrawal Method instead? What if I stained my parent's sheets or walls?

Tekneek · 11-25-2006, 04:43 PM

Hah. Guess you didn't have a lot of experience with hiding condoms as a teenager, eh?

I learned that it is a good idea to always have some other colored bag to put a used condom in before putting it in the trash...

Not that I am too proud of that, since I have a daughter now.

At least I am wise to a few more tricks, I suppose.

Coffee Warlord · 11-25-2006, 04:48 PM

Birth control is your friend.

Further proof condoms are evil.

klayman · 11-25-2006, 05:40 PM

You feel bad, how about the dog? He's walking around with your used condom in his mouth.

AZSpeechCoach · 11-25-2006, 07:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rizon

Should I use the Withdrawal Method instead? What if I stained my parent's sheets or walls?

How powerful do you want us to assume you are?

Rizon · 11-25-2006, 07:38 PM

Should I have not used orange flavored? Maybe next time use regular? I'm surprised the dog likes orange.

Vinatieri for Prez · 11-25-2006, 08:15 PM

Using a trasch can is a mistake - it's always a mistake. The toilet is the only option.

Philliesfan980 · 11-25-2006, 08:16 PM

That thing will clog up the toilet. Bad idea.

Vinatieri for Prez · 11-25-2006, 09:03 PM

Not if done properly. Years of experience.

CU Tiger · 11-26-2006, 05:45 PM

Wrap in TP then flush away....

Of couse if you have a septic tank, it will be humorous if they have to clean it out

MizzouRah · 11-26-2006, 07:46 PM

This thread needs stickied on the front page.

Raiders Army · 11-26-2006, 07:48 PM

Put her on the pill.

Oh yeah, was it ribbed for her pleasure?

KWhit · 11-27-2006, 12:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Coffee Warlord

Birth control is your friend.

Further proof condoms are evil.

Yes. Yes.

rkmsuf · 11-27-2006, 12:09 PM

I'm still fascinated by the concern of hitting the wall.

BrianD · 11-27-2006, 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Raiders Army

Put her on the pill.

Oh yeah, was it ribbed for her pleasure?

It was, but he wore it inside-out. He's selfish that way.

Desnudo · 11-27-2006, 01:37 PM

You're married, but still have to wear a condom?

Eaglesfan27 · 11-27-2006, 02:33 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desnudo

You're married, but still have to wear a condom?

Some women don't tolerate any of the various formulations of the pill/patch/injection well. Fortunately, usually some formulation will work well for most women.

dervack · 11-27-2006, 03:16 PM

And there are some women who are also allergic to the proteins in semen.

willem · 11-27-2006, 06:11 PM

He must have known there was a bone in there.

Rizon · 11-27-2006, 07:47 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desnudo

You're married, but still have to wear a condom?

Wife has a pretty bad reaction to pills. I really hate condoms, though. Especially when the damn dog is gobbling on my nut.

Logan · 11-27-2006, 08:10 PM

Okay, I'm generally okay with the "vague subject line to FOFC threads" but this was one that really needed a "DOG IS RUNNING AROUND WITH MY USED CONDOM" title. It took me 2 days to read this accidentally.

Edit after reading Crim's post: This is a plea for change based on how I would've liked to have read this thread 2 days ago

.

Edit #2: I'll take klayman.

Crim · 11-27-2006, 08:25 PM

I, on the other hand, am rejoicing that I finally clicked on this thread. lighthousekeeper is the early frontrunner in this one, I'm thinking.

Desnudo · 11-28-2006, 11:18 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rizon

Wife has a pretty bad reaction to pills. I really hate condoms, though. Especially when the damn dog is gobbling on my nut.

The Ladies Man has a suggestion.

rkmsuf · 11-28-2006, 11:20 AM

Maybe you need to incorporate the dog into your love making.

Subby · 11-28-2006, 11:28 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Desnudo

The Ladies Man has a suggestion.

Totally agree. If you fuck your dog in the ass I bet it will NEVER EVER embarrass you like that again.

You have to show 'em who's boss!

Subby · 11-28-2006, 11:29 AM

Oh...Ladies Man

Nevermind...

MizzouRah · 11-28-2006, 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Subby

Totally agree. If you fuck your dog in the ass I bet it will NEVER EVER embarrass you like that again.

You have to show 'em who's boss!

klayman · 11-28-2006, 05:28 PM

Either way the dog ends up getting screwed!

/won't somebody please think of the dogs

M GO BLUE!!! · 11-28-2006, 06:37 PM

Buccaneer · 11-28-2006, 07:15 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by rkmsuf

Maybe you need to incorporate the dog into your love making.

The Aristocrats!

Lorena · 11-28-2006, 08:49 PM

I am strangely fascinated by this thread.

Rizon · 11-28-2006, 10:14 PM

I want to change the title of this thread, but I have not the powers.

So I will post a picture of the culprit in action instead:

Pumpy Tudors · 11-28-2006, 10:49 PM

oh god

Logan · 11-29-2006, 06:53 PM

You might've went too far this time.

ISiddiqui · 11-29-2006, 09:17 PM

Is he available for parties?

11-25-2006, 02:49 PM	#5
JonInMiddleGA Hall Of Famer Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: Behind Enemy Lines in Athens, GA	LMAO. That oughta be in a movie or something. __________________ "I lit another cigarette. Unless I specifically inform you to the contrary, I am always lighting another cigarette." - from a novel by Martin Amis

11-25-2006, 02:58 PM	#8
bbor Pro Starter Join Date: May 2001 Location: toronto	Could have been worse...you could have still had the condom on when they grabbed it. __________________ Pumpy Tudors Now that I've cracked and made that admission, I wonder if I'm only a couple of steps away from wanting to tongue-kiss Jaromir Jagr and give Bobby Clarke a blowjob.

11-25-2006, 03:25 PM	#10
lighthousekeeper College Starter Join Date: Oct 2000	This thread is in Hell Atlantic's wheelhouse. __________________ ...

11-25-2006, 04:43 PM	#14
Tekneek Pro Rookie Join Date: Nov 2000 Location: USA	Hah. Guess you didn't have a lot of experience with hiding condoms as a teenager, eh? I learned that it is a good idea to always have some other colored bag to put a used condom in before putting it in the trash... Not that I am too proud of that, since I have a daughter now. At least I am wise to a few more tricks, I suppose. Last edited by Tekneek : 11-25-2006 at 04:45 PM.

11-27-2006, 12:09 PM	#26
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	I'm still fascinated by the concern of hitting the wall. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

11-25-2006, 02:47 PM	#2
k0ruptr Pro Starter Join Date: Apr 2003 Location: Las Vegas	uh. thats fucked up. __________________ Xbox Live Gamertag: k0ruptr My Favorite Teams : Chicago White Sox - Carolina Panthers - Orlando Magic - Phoenix Suns - Anaheim Ducks - Hawaii Warriors - Oregon Ducks

11-25-2006, 02:54 PM	#6
DaddyTorgo Hall Of Famer Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Massachusetts	i'll echo the "could have been worse" part of it. also...how long have you been married?

11-25-2006, 02:58 PM	#7
Schmidty Coordinator Join Date: Apr 2001 Location: Early, TX	That makes me want to vomit.

11-25-2006, 02:58 PM	#9
Anthony Banned Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Astoria, NY, USA	if i was a nasty person, i woulda said "that'll teach ya to ditch the condoms and just splooge in her face as a cheap and fun contraception alternative". but i'm not a nasty person. sigh

11-25-2006, 04:32 PM	#12
Philliesfan980 Banned Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Exton, PA	Seriously, aren't dogs disgusting?

11-25-2006, 04:48 PM	#15
Coffee Warlord Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Colorado Springs	Birth control is your friend. Further proof condoms are evil.

11-25-2006, 05:40 PM	#16
klayman College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Edmonton	You feel bad, how about the dog? He's walking around with your used condom in his mouth.

11-25-2006, 08:15 PM	#19
Vinatieri for Prez College Starter Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Seattle	Using a trasch can is a mistake - it's always a mistake. The toilet is the only option.

11-25-2006, 08:16 PM	#20
Philliesfan980 Banned Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Exton, PA	That thing will clog up the toilet. Bad idea.

11-25-2006, 09:03 PM	#21
Vinatieri for Prez College Starter Join Date: Feb 2003 Location: Seattle	Not if done properly. Years of experience.

11-26-2006, 05:45 PM	#22
CU Tiger Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Nov 2006 Location: Backwoods, SC	Wrap in TP then flush away.... Of couse if you have a septic tank, it will be humorous if they have to clean it out

11-26-2006, 07:46 PM	#23
MizzouRah Hall Of Famer Join Date: Sep 2002 Location: Troy, Mo	This thread needs stickied on the front page.

11-26-2006, 07:48 PM	#24
Raiders Army Coordinator Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Black Hole	Put her on the pill. Oh yeah, was it ribbed for her pleasure?

11-27-2006, 01:37 PM	#28
Desnudo Coordinator Join Date: Jul 2003 Location: Here and There	You're married, but still have to wear a condom?

11-27-2006, 03:16 PM	#30
dervack College Prospect Join Date: Jun 2005	And there are some women who are also allergic to the proteins in semen.

11-27-2006, 06:11 PM	#31
willem n00b Join Date: Dec 2004 Location: Del Mar, CA	He must have known there was a bone in there.

11-27-2006, 08:10 PM	#33
Logan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: NYC	Okay, I'm generally okay with the "vague subject line to FOFC threads" but this was one that really needed a "DOG IS RUNNING AROUND WITH MY USED CONDOM" title. It took me 2 days to read this accidentally. Edit after reading Crim's post: This is a plea for change based on how I would've liked to have read this thread 2 days ago . Edit #2: I'll take klayman. Last edited by Logan : 11-27-2006 at 08:37 PM.

11-28-2006, 11:20 AM	#36
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	Maybe you need to incorporate the dog into your love making. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

11-28-2006, 11:29 AM	#38
Subby lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: sans pants	Oh...Ladies Man Nevermind...

11-28-2006, 05:28 PM	#40
klayman College Benchwarmer Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Edmonton	Either way the dog ends up getting screwed! /won't somebody please think of the dogs

11-28-2006, 06:37 PM	#41
M GO BLUE!!! Pro Starter Join Date: Sep 2005

11-28-2006, 08:49 PM	#43
Lorena Unregistered Join Date: May 2004	I am strangely fascinated by this thread.

11-28-2006, 10:49 PM	#45
Pumpy Tudors Bounty Hunter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Pittsburgh, PA	oh god __________________ No, I am not Batman, and I will not repair your food processor.

11-29-2006, 06:53 PM	#46
Logan Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: NYC	You might've went too far this time.

11-29-2006, 09:17 PM	#47
ISiddiqui Hall Of Famer Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Decatur, GA	Is he available for parties? __________________ "A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages" -Tennessee Williams

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