stevew's Face The Board Answers

[Antmeister]

Yes, the #1 asswhite has come through, so sit back and enjoy this week's version of the FTB.

Originally Posted by JHandley

Just how the hell did you find Jon's phone number?

That episode is still talked about, at length, on #FOFC. The whole thing ranks easily as one of the top 3 stories we tell when we remember Calamari's begining.

Well, he had mentioned his last name at one point, I checked the logs and found it. Then it came down to my mad googling skills, and a random phone call. That was really an odd experience, but I think most all of us would have preferred a notification at that point. Considering how those crazy Euros are on an odd time schedule.

Originally Posted by st.cronin

My official question is:

Why am I so fond of you?

Because I'm loveable and huggable.

Originally Posted by Butter_of_69

what better, terry bradshaw or ben roethlisberger

what better, larry nance or brad daugherty

Bradshaw has the rings, but I'm really not old enough to remember him playing. I'll go with ben, even though he has a propensity to make bad decisions and likes to throw red zone interceptions.

Daugherty by far, but I was really more of a Harper fan. Bastards traded him for that White Stiff Danny Ferry, who now is probably one of the worst GM's out there. It's a testament to the greatness of LeBron that the team is still playing in the playoffs, considering the random collection of shit on the Cavs roster.

As far as the Nance/Daugherty era goes, I watched a few games a year live, but honestly for the most part I watched the Hawks play more than anyone, due to their accessiblity on TBS. And the Jordan shot over Ehlo still burns me up...I remember getting kicked out of youth group that night cause we stayed late in another part of the church and finished watching that game.

Originally Posted by bsak16

How can you root for every other Pittsburgh team and not the Pirates? Why the Phillies?

I grew up liking Mike Schmidt, and the Pirates were pretty bad in there in the mid 80s. I've more or less morphed over to the Yankees over the last year or two. I know it sounds all sappy and shit, but me and my dad don't have too much in common, but at least that is one thing we got.

Originally Posted by st.cronin

Imagine you're the pitcher, facing Barry Bonds in a game of neighborhood wiffle ball. What's your strategy?

Aim for the head.

Originally Posted by Groundhog

Drew Gooden: A keeper? Or time to look elsewhere this offseason?

Gooden is an enigma wrapped in a riddle. I think he's a keeper, but if they bring him back the "reverse hitler" thing he's got growing needs to go. I'm slowly growing fond of him, but he's so damned inconsistant. But I think they could upgrade the PG spot a bit, and he'd be okay. I'm sure he'll get traded though, as he's one of the few tradeable assets on the team.

Originally Posted by terpkristin

1. Put your music player on random shuffle. What are the next 5 songs that come up?

2. What song/album are you listening to most these days?

3. What are your top 5 movies (you don't need to rank them 1-5 unless you want to)?

4. It seems obvious from these other questions that you follow football. Any other sports you follow?

5. What is your current job? What is your dream job?

/tk

1. Hmm, let's see, I really don't buy too much music. I have a handful of CD's in the car, but primarily I just listen to XM. I used to have a pretty decent size music collection, but I've probably moved like 6-8 times over the past 10 years, and you lose some stuff along the way.

2. The last CD I bought was by the Artic Monkeys, but I stil probably listen to that recent Amy Winehouse CD more

3. Boogie Nights, Goodfellas, Pulp Fiction, Jerry Maguire, Star Wars Saga(I even like the new ones)

4. I follow baseball somewhat, Basketball a lot, and Nascar a little. Basically my dad likes nascar quite a bit, so I follow just enough so that he'll have someone to talk to it about, since my brother hates it.

5. Right now I work overnights for Sheetz, and I also work part time in sales for Sears. I'm pretty much Dante Hicks in a lot of ways, but I don't like donkey shows. Ideally I would have something a lot more normal, in a desk during the day. But right now, with a small child, that isn't going to happen.

Originally Posted by st.cronin

How tall are you?

Right at 6'4"

Originally Posted by Drake

Is your name really Steve? I'm desperate to know this.

No, actually my name is Stephen.

Originally Posted by Dodgerchick

Why the "kick the chicks" signature you had a while back? What do you have against baby chickens?

Bath or shower?

Shower, merely cause I'm too tall to adequately enjoy laying down completely in the tub.

Worst movies you've ever seen?

Best movies you've ever seen?

Most everything that comes out anymore is a turd to some degree. But I really don't get out to the movies all that much, I try to catch up to stuff on cable(on demand)

Gimme 1 movie that was so bad it was good.

Shit, I'm stumped right now, but I'll reanswer this one when I think about it some more.

How close are you to your family?

I probably visit my parents a couple times a month, they live like one town over. But maybe as far as day to day stuff goes, I really don't call or anything. I talk to my one younger brother quite a bit, although he's busy with work and school. We used to hang out quite a bit a few years ago, he's like 7 years younger than I am, I left home when he was 12 or 13, so at least we've sort of re-bonded. My other brother is 29, he lives in pittsburgh but we really don't talk too much. Not that there's any kind of fighting between us, but he's busy in his own circle, and it's just too damned far away to visit too often. I like his wife though, she's pretty cool. Although she has the same name as my daughter, so now we have Lauren the first, and Lauren the 2nd.

Extended family, not so much. Nothing really in common with hardly any of my relatives. I basically only talk to my one cousin who is a Pa State rep, other than that, I usually fall asleep downstairs during family functions. Honestly, once my grandma dies, I doubt that people will hang out any more. There's a ton of resentment building since she's in an expensive home. I think my dad feels like he's carrying too much of the burden....not so much financially, but they don't really go visit her much. And he's gotta keep all of her affairs in order. It's crazy how old people can have a fairly large amount of money, like she did, but live so thrifty. I have like 20 some cousins, but like I was saying, we weren't really raised with any of them, and I don't have much of a relationship with any.

What do you do to cool down when you're pissed off?

Sleep

So what exactly does a "freelance assasin" do?

Eh, that was just something silly I put there a long time ago, and forgot it was still there until you mentioned it.

Where were you born and raised?

Western PA, in a small town near the ohio border named Mercer. I moved away for like 10 plus years, but moved back like 2 years ago to a slightly larger town than the one I was raised in(hermitage).

Originally Posted by Maple Leafs

Does it bother you that some RWBL owners consider you to be a poor man's Hell Atlantic?

I dunno, I usually put together a winning team, so I'm not sure why I would be compared to someone who didnt.

Originally Posted by Antmeister

How did you and your wife meet?

College, freshman year. It's been a long time now.

Did you own any 45s back in the day?

Mainly just those book/record combos, not really recorded music though. My parents were pretty strict with what we bought

Did you have an extensive cassette tape collection and what type of music were/are you into?

I had quite a few alt-rock tapes, and quite a few casettes at one point. My daughter got into them, and most of them got ruined unfortunately.

What type of books, movies, and/or other forms of entertainment are you into?

I don't really read books. I watch movies when i get the chance, but for the most part I'm too busy to watch much more than Sports on TV

Since we are both in WOOF, is this your first multiplayer league or have you been in other ones?

I was in several different Jumpshot Basketball Leagues, the WigFL was one of the first FOF2k7 leagues. I've been in the RWBL for like 3-4 years now, I think it's been nearly that long.

What is something that you feel the most proudest about?

I dunno, that's a pretty hard question, I'm really not sure what to answer.

Mild mannered guy, quick tempered, or only violent if forced into the situation?

Usually pretty mild mannered, although I don't have as much patience as I used to.

Any event in the your life that you wish you could change?

I wish I would have done better in college, and finished. But for the most part, I wouldn't change too much.

Favorite part of the female anatomy?

I dunno, that's just such a hard question. Most women have at least one good feature, I mean, strippers with nice bodies will come into work quite a bit, but most all of them are butterfaced, so it's not like you could actually enjoy being with them. The prototypical "Coyote Ugly" if you will.

Does your wife know about your other life on the FOFC?

Yeah, I may have to go all Machiavelli around here at some point.

Are there any events in your life that you dreaded at the time, but in retrospect you are glad that you went through it?

I thought having a child would be a lot harder than it ended up being.

How attached have you gotten to your cat? Did you end up keeping any of the kittens?

I hate the babymomma, but the kids aren't so bad. She only had 2, so we decided to keep them both. The Boy kitten, named "Crash" is going to be huge. In retrospect I wish I would have named him "Casey" since he's a big bruiser like Casey Hampton.
"

What prompted jbmagic to call you an asswhite in the first place?

I think I made fun of his fake stupid english grammar. Cmon, at some point, when other people keep calling you out on it, you gotta read shit out loud, and see if it makes any sense.....what you type. I don't buy his reindeer games.

How many sports have you actually participated in your lifetime?

Basketball and Baseball. Soccer a bit, but it wasn't for as long as those others. I wish I would have played football though.

What is something that terrifies you the most?

Divorce

Why do you dislike most about John Mellencamp's music?

I hate how he tries to be all salt of the earth, and still lives in probably a multi-million dollar home. People want to sing along with his music all of the time, which is another annoying factor. His idea of "our country" and most normal peoples ideas are radically different.

If you could take a Poloroid of the most troubling moment of your life, how would you describe the image?

Dark road. Trapped between 2 menacing looking thugs. Nowhere to run to.

Have you successfully continued to stay away from Walmart or did you turn to the dark side?

I had to break down and get some groceries there a few months back. Trying to stay away, especially when you need the convenience/need to go shopping at specific times, is nearly impossible. I prefer Target, but it's so far away. And I primarily shop at Aldi's, but it has limited hours, and I don't usually have access to a car during the day..

One thing you do that embarrases your child(ren)?

The youngest one is obsessed with wiping off kisses after you give them to her. My oldest one hates it when I call her babe.

What is something that drives you absolutely crazy?

Probably modded cars. You can put all the plastic shit you want on it. The spoiler, the rims, the engine. The enhanced annoyingly loud rice boy sounding muffler. Glass pack whatever you want, and throw a big sticker on the windshield. Paint it with chameleon paint.

It's still a Ford Focus dude.

How many kids do you have?

I have 2 girls that are 8 and 3.

What is the size of the family that you grew up with?

I had 2 brothers, and my parents are still married.

Are you balding or do you have unnaturally superior hair?

Slightly thinning, I've always had quite a bit of a "high hairline" though. But yeah, definitely not balding. But I've been gray for at least 5 years now. I look like i'm 20 in the face, but I have the hair color of a 40 year old.

Who is your most favorite athlete in any sport?

Probably Troy Polamalu

Have you been married more than once?

Not yet, anyways.

Did/Do you have any friends or previous girlfriends that your family detested?

I went to school pretty far from home. My parents didn't really know my wife too well before we got married.

If you could choose a custom title for yourself, what would it be?

I dunno, probably I would have settled for Asswhite, but I see that one got taken already

For some people, home is where one has grown up, while for others it is your current place of residence and different variations in between. Where exactly is home for you?

Well, I moved back home to near where I grew up a few years back. I guess it's home now. I do have a soft spot in my heart for the Tri Cities in TN though.

At this moment, do you feel like you are progressing or regressing with your life?

Currently standing still I think. Progressing in some areas, however.

Do you have any vices that you are trying to curb?

Fucking Cigarettes again.

What are some thing that no one on this board knows about you?

I'm sure there are a lot of things, but I can't really think of one off hand.

Who is your closest family member outside of you immediate family?

Not really any of them, nobody I call on a regular basis.

Are there any family members/friends that you distance yourself from since you had gotten married?

One of the reasons I moved from virginia was because I didn't like the way my brother and sister in law were raising their kids. I didn't want to have my daughters hanging around with their kids who probably will turn into godless whores any day now.

Where was the best place you worked in your lifetime?

I worked at a nice little bar/mexican grill in Virginia, pretty much the whole time I was there. It was a lot of fun, even if it didn't pay particularly well, and was pretty stressful.

Any outside hobbies?

Does Mowing the grass count?

Any past friends/girlfriends that you think about from time to time?

A lot of my "friends" from High School still live in the area, but I haven't seen them in a year or so. I think about calling them from time to time, but then I think about it, and they can call me just as easily. I've more or less accepted that we've moved on, but it would be nice to get together and play some madden or something from time to time. I might have a party sometime and invite them, I'm sure they'd come. A lot depends on my schedule, and how much of my house I can get done this summer.

Are you the dictator of the household, cooperative partner, or whipped?

A little of all three

How would your kids describe you? Your wife? Your friends?

I dunno, I'm trying to calm down quite a bit, but I think my kids think I'm angry all the time. I'm just usually sleep deprived, but I've been working on being more patient.

Originally Posted by bsak16

If you were GM of the following teams what would you do to improve them?

Pittsburgh Steelers?

Spend some money every once in awhile. Quit investing in so many scrub "depth" players. Over the past several years they've basically let the Patriots out "Steeler" them. Sitting for years when they didn't try/didn't want to upgrade Kordell or Tommy was pure pain. Thank god for Ben. I wish they would stop being so "old fashioned" and actually look to get value out of their players. I respect that they just let Porter walk, but I also think they could have probably at least attempted to trade him, and then we'd have had something. I dunno what they'll do with Faneca, but if they cut him outright we get nothing, if he leaves via FA, we get a 3rd round comp in 2 years. Obviously nowhere near enough to replace an all pro guard.

Pittsburgh Pirates?

Contraction? I don't really see a point in the team continuing to exist, that Perez for Nady deal looks pretty awful now. Perhaps they thought Nady would turn into RWBL Nady or something.

Philadelphia Phillies?

I'm not sure what to do here, obviously they need a bullpen. But also you can't afford to buy the "Best" relievers either. I'd think out of the box more....if you have to bring a kid up early, at least you could get him solid experience trying to get batters out in middle relief. I'd also trade Hamels to the Yankees, but that's just a team merging fantasy of mine.

You've lived a few places now, which is your favorite and why?

I think I liked NE Tennessee the most. But it may have been cause we didn't have kids yet, and could actually go out and do things. Not sure.

What is the craziest thing that has ever happened to you or a co-worker at work?

There's just so much crazy shit that goes on in retail. People are miserable fucks. Some dude threw a bagel at me the other day cause I put his cream cheese on the side.

Originally Posted by Richard Weed

What's your favorite scary movie?

I don't usually watch scary movies

Originally Posted by Solecismic

Did you really want the workout warrior Joe Staley on the Steelers, or was that just cynicism speaking and are you happy with the Lawrence Timmons pick?

I just think they should have traded down, or yes, I would have grabbed an o-line like Blalock or Staley that I could lock up for 6 years. I didn't think Timmons was that impressive, that he just screamed "#15 overall pick." He wasn't even all-ACC or anything, IIRC. I think he's too small, although I guess he's young enough and can get bigger. The TE pick in the 3rd is a bigger head scratcher. Even if the guy is great, I'd still have preferred we drafted an o-line or RB there. In FOF terms, Willie Parker is probably like a 60ish overall back. The rest of our guys are probably 30-35's.

Have you finished the basement yet? Would you ever go fixer-upper again, or is it just new houses from now on?

Well, it was fixer upper, or continue to rent. So in spite of the fact that I'm not a handy man, I think it was an okay decision. I cleaned it up quite a bit, but in reality I can't see having the resources needed to fix it up for another year or two. I'm not even sure we really need the space, we have a fairly large enough house right now. Although it would be nice to have somewhere to send the kids so that they don't keep trashing the living room. I'd definitely buy new if I could have...I'm thinking I'll refinance in a few years and hire a contractor to fix up a few of the things around here that are a problem.

[flere-imsaho]

Another great read. Thanks stevew!

[Antmeister]

There's just so much crazy shit that goes on in retail. People are miserable fucks. Some dude threw a bagel at me the other day cause I put his cream cheese on the side.

Man, this had me rolling because I am imagining the ridiculous conversation that led to the bagel pelting.

[MikeVic]

Good job.

[Drake]

Yay! Well done, Stephen.

[terpkristin]

Originally Posted by stevew

You've got to be kidding me! I mean, I kind of dislike it when someone puts cream cheese on the side when I'm getting it "to go" (because I have to stop and put it on before I get into the car so I can eat as I drive) but that's just sad. People need to grow up.

Good read all in all, though, thanks for the mid-day entertainment!

/tk

[MikeVic]

Ah wait, you didn't answer my question! Boo!

[stevew]

Oh, shit, must not have multi quoted that.

Originally Posted by MikeVic

Who would be your top 3 favourite Steelers players of all time?

Troy Polamalu, Casey Hampton, and probably Hines Ward. Troy is a bigtime playmaker, I enjoy seeing him blow things up. Casey can just be so dominant in the middle of the field, it's like watching the other team run into the brick wall. And Ward, he just brings the pain. Granted he has questionable hands from time to time, but I enjoy watching him work.

I really liked "Slash" Stewart, but the Kordell era was one of the worst experiences as a fan. Ever.

And Randel El, I just think they didn't use him like they could have until the last minute, right before he left. He would make some amazingly awful decisions, but he was still a playmaker. The amount of "real" money he got from the Skins wasn't even all that much. I suppose once I warm to Santonio a bit more, he will more than replace ARE. We don't win the superbowl without his arm(and the refs that gave the game to us )

[MikeVic]

Thanks for the answer!

[Lorena]

Originally Posted by MikeVic

Ah wait, you didn't answer my question! Boo!

Mine neither.... where's my kick the chicks answer?

[JediKooter]

Good read Steve.

[Subby]

#fofc?

[NoMyths]

Good to have more insight about you, Steve...enjoyed reading it.

[Schmidty]

My question didn't get answered. I am offended.

[stevew]

Originally Posted by Schmidty

My question didn't get answered. I am offended.

Sorry, didn't see it until i was already finished.

[Lorena]

Originally Posted by Dodgerchick

Mine neither.... where's my kick the chicks answer?

Hmm... the lack of answer makes me wonder

[wade moore]

Originally Posted by Subby

#fofc?

I had the same thought - there's an FOFC IRC room?!

[DanGarion]

good stuff!

[stevew]

Originally Posted by wade moore

I had the same thought - there's an FOFC IRC room?!

The Omerta server, there were like 10-15 FOFCers on there at any given point in time for a long time.