Why can't people make microwave popcorn without burning it (or work rant post #9257)

Suburban Rhythm · 10-04-2007, 02:10 PM

Discuss

larrymcg421 · 10-04-2007, 02:18 PM

The problem is that people time it, which you can't do. The times on the instructions are always way too long, and it varies by microwave anyways. You have to have enough damn patience to stand at the microwave for a couple minutes and listen for when the popping slows down. When people walk away and let it cook for a minute too long, they fucking ruin the break room for everyone else.

rkmsuf · 10-04-2007, 02:23 PM

I like burnt popcorn.

stevew · 10-04-2007, 02:29 PM

Yeah, i used to hate it when assholes would do this as well.

Suburban Rhythm · 10-04-2007, 02:32 PM

On a good note...one of the few people who comes in relatively early (7:00) with me...brought donuts in, so i snagged two before most people were even here.

BrianD · 10-04-2007, 02:35 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by larrymcg421

The problem is that people time it, which you can't do. The times on the instructions are always way too long, and it varies by microwave anyways. You have to have enough damn patience to stand at the microwave for a couple minutes and listen for when the popping slows down. When people walk away and let it cook for a minute too long, they fucking ruin the break room for everyone else.

Timing it really isn't that hard if you do it properly. The timing will change based on the microwave, but it is always within a range of time. If it takes between 2:10 and 2:40 for the popcorn to be done, just set the microwave for 2:10. You may end up with a bit more unpopped than you'd get if you waited there, but that last little bit isn't going to change your enjoyment level.

Some of my worst popcorn burning experiences have been when I have been waiting and watching the process. Some bags get that constant rhythmic popping which continues long after the early-popped stuff turns to ash.

Fidatelo · 10-04-2007, 02:39 PM

I do believe that popcorn is labeled as taint, along with McDonald's food, and therefore the offender should be shunned accordingly.

lordscarlet · 10-04-2007, 02:42 PM

Speaking of patience... Yesterday my coworker microwaved a pop tart because she didn't want to wait for the toaster.

stevew · 10-04-2007, 02:45 PM

At least they didn't make stanky Ramen. That shit is even worse than burnt popcorn.

Subby · 10-04-2007, 02:54 PM

People overreact to it enough that now I just do it on purpose.

Young Drachma · 10-04-2007, 02:59 PM

My office is far enough back that I don't usually smell it. And if I do, I close my door.

larrymcg421 · 10-04-2007, 03:04 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BrianD

Timing it really isn't that hard if you do it properly. The timing will change based on the microwave, but it is always within a range of time. If it takes between 2:10 and 2:40 for the popcorn to be done, just set the microwave for 2:10. You may end up with a bit more unpopped than you'd get if you waited there, but that last little bit isn't going to change your enjoyment level.

Some of my worst popcorn burning experiences have been when I have been waiting and watching the process. Some bags get that constant rhythmic popping which continues long after the early-popped stuff turns to ash.

You don't wait for the popping to completely stop, just for it to slow down. It's true that it will pop for quite some time after it is done, but if you stop it when it starts to slow down you should be good to go.

BrianD · 10-04-2007, 04:25 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by larrymcg421

You don't wait for the popping to completely stop, just for it to slow down. It's true that it will pop for quite some time after it is done, but if you stop it when it starts to slow down you should be good to go.

Instructions on the bags used to say it was done when it went 2 or 3 seconds without a pop. That must not be right anymore since I got charcoal when I couldn't even start counting between pops. Using a slow-down as your benchmark is probably similar to just setting the timer for the minimum time...but without the need to judge each time.

Mantle2600 · 10-04-2007, 05:08 PM

Better than some New York wannabe fat ass that is part Italian so he thinks he is a mobster, ordering lunch 3 times a day and getting onions, garlic or anything else that smells horrible. I hate that bastard.

Ironhead · 10-04-2007, 05:10 PM

In our microwave at home it only takes about 1:40 for a full bag to pop. Like someone else said you just have to wait until you only hear about 1 or 2 kernels popping a second and then take it out.

Toddzilla · 10-04-2007, 06:03 PM

Take solace in the fact that microwave popcorn causes cancer, so the assholes who are constantly eating it - and burning it - are going to die sooner, thus thinning out the workforce in a neat Darwinian fashion.

Karlifornia · 10-04-2007, 07:07 PM

If you get to two full seconds between a pop, shit's done

Lathum · 10-04-2007, 10:07 PM

My old office actually prohibited people from making microwave popcorn because to many morons couldn't manage it.

Karlifornia · 10-04-2007, 11:01 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Toddzilla

Take solace in the fact that microwave popcorn causes cancer, so the assholes who are constantly eating it - and burning it - are going to die sooner, thus thinning out the workforce in a neat Darwinian fashion.

Thomkal · 10-05-2007, 05:55 AM

we actually have a popcorn button on our microwave at home which worked fine for the bigger bags, but we have to watch with the smaller bags as its very easy to wait too long with those.

gstelmack · 10-05-2007, 08:44 AM

Things inconsiderate office workers do:

1. Put food in the microwave, then walk away for 10 minutes, then get annoyed you pulled their food out so you could heat yours up.
2. Pull food out of the microwave early and not clear the clock.
3. Don't throw away the box when they take the last donut/bagel/plastic utensil.
4. Don't erase the whiteboard after the meeting.

Greyroofoo · 10-05-2007, 09:35 AM

simple answer:

make your damn popcorn.

Mota · 10-05-2007, 10:25 PM

Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend.

Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"

Karlifornia · 10-06-2007, 04:05 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mota

Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend.

Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"

Maybe you shouldn't be a Spanish slang term for TEH EVIL MARYWANNA!

Toddzilla · 10-06-2007, 08:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Mota

Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend.

Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"

One word: Sabotage.

10-04-2007, 02:18 PM	#2
larrymcg421 Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2002 Location: Georgia	The problem is that people time it, which you can't do. The times on the instructions are always way too long, and it varies by microwave anyways. You have to have enough damn patience to stand at the microwave for a couple minutes and listen for when the popping slows down. When people walk away and let it cook for a minute too long, they fucking ruin the break room for everyone else. __________________ Top 10 Songs of the Year 1955-Present (1976 Added) Franchise Portfolio Draft Winner Fictional Character Draft Winner Television Family Draft Winner Build Your Own Hollywood Studio Draft Winner

10-04-2007, 02:23 PM	#3
rkmsuf Head Coach Join Date: Dec 2001	I like burnt popcorn. __________________ "Don't you have homes?" -- Judge Smales

10-04-2007, 02:32 PM	#5
Suburban Rhythm Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2002 Location: Pittsburgh	On a good note...one of the few people who comes in relatively early (7:00) with me...brought donuts in, so i snagged two before most people were even here. __________________ "Do you guys play fast tempos with odd time signatures?" "Yeah" "Cool!!"

10-04-2007, 02:39 PM	#7
Fidatelo Pro Starter Join Date: Nov 2002 Location: Winnipeg, MB	I do believe that popcorn is labeled as taint, along with McDonald's food, and therefore the offender should be shunned accordingly. __________________ "Breakfast? Breakfast schmekfast, look at the score for God's sake. It's only the second period and I'm winning 12-2. Breakfasts come and go, Rene, but Hartford, the Whale, they only beat Vancouver maybe once or twice in a lifetime."

10-04-2007, 02:42 PM	#8
lordscarlet Pro Starter Join Date: Oct 2005 Location: Washington, DC	Speaking of patience... Yesterday my coworker microwaved a pop tart because she didn't want to wait for the toaster. __________________ Sixteen Colors ANSI/ASCII Art Archive "...the better half of the Moores..." -cthomer5000

10-04-2007, 02:29 PM	#4
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	Yeah, i used to hate it when assholes would do this as well.

10-04-2007, 02:45 PM	#9
stevew Hall Of Famer Join Date: Dec 2003 Location: the yo'	At least they didn't make stanky Ramen. That shit is even worse than burnt popcorn.

10-04-2007, 02:54 PM	#10
Subby lolzcat Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: sans pants	People overreact to it enough that now I just do it on purpose. __________________ Superman was flying around and saw Wonder Woman getting a tan in the nude on her balcony. Superman said I going to hit that real fast. So he flys down toward Wonder Woman to hit it and their is a loud scream. The Invincible Man scream what just hit me in the ass!!!!! I do shit, I take pictures, I write about it: chrisshue.com

10-04-2007, 02:59 PM	#11
Young Drachma Dark Cloud Join Date: Apr 2001	My office is far enough back that I don't usually smell it. And if I do, I close my door. __________________ Current dynasty: Up The Scots: Play To Clinch Tennis Dynasty \| OOTP Mod: Managerial Strategy Files \| GM Excel Competitive Balance Tax/Revenue Sharing Calc \| FBCB Mods on Github

10-04-2007, 05:08 PM	#14
Mantle2600 High School Varsity Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: The Dawg Pound	Better than some New York wannabe fat ass that is part Italian so he thinks he is a mobster, ordering lunch 3 times a day and getting onions, garlic or anything else that smells horrible. I hate that bastard. __________________ Member of the Underground Browns. Cavs. Tribe. Buckeyes. Period.

10-04-2007, 05:10 PM	#15
Ironhead College Prospect Join Date: Apr 2004 Location: New Jersey	In our microwave at home it only takes about 1:40 for a full bag to pop. Like someone else said you just have to wait until you only hear about 1 or 2 kernels popping a second and then take it out.

10-04-2007, 06:03 PM	#16
Toddzilla Pro Starter Join Date: Jan 2001 Location: Burke, VA	Take solace in the fact that microwave popcorn causes cancer, so the assholes who are constantly eating it - and burning it - are going to die sooner, thus thinning out the workforce in a neat Darwinian fashion.

10-04-2007, 07:07 PM	#17
Karlifornia Grizzled Veteran Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: San Jose, CA	If you get to two full seconds between a pop, shit's done __________________ Look into the mind of a crazy man (NSFW) http://www.whitepowerupdate.wordpress.com

10-04-2007, 10:07 PM	#18
Lathum Favored Bitch #1 Join Date: Dec 2001 Location: homeless in NJ	My old office actually prohibited people from making microwave popcorn because to many morons couldn't manage it.

10-05-2007, 05:55 AM	#20
Thomkal Head Coach Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Surfside Beach,SC USA	we actually have a popcorn button on our microwave at home which worked fine for the bigger bags, but we have to watch with the smaller bags as its very easy to wait too long with those.

10-05-2007, 08:44 AM	#21
gstelmack Pro Starter Join Date: Oct 2000 Location: Cary, NC	Things inconsiderate office workers do: 1. Put food in the microwave, then walk away for 10 minutes, then get annoyed you pulled their food out so you could heat yours up. 2. Pull food out of the microwave early and not clear the clock. 3. Don't throw away the box when they take the last donut/bagel/plastic utensil. 4. Don't erase the whiteboard after the meeting. __________________ -- Greg -- Author of various FOF utilities

10-05-2007, 09:35 AM	#22
Greyroofoo Pro Starter Join Date: Nov 2003 Location: Alabama	simple answer: make your damn popcorn.

10-05-2007, 10:25 PM	#23
Mota College Starter Join Date: Jan 2001	Our microwave is RIGHT beside my desk. It's horrible, especially when people warm up their stinky trout. I put a sign up asking people not to cook fish at this station and to bring it to the cafeteria, but people were all offended and I was asked to take it down. Next time someone nukes some stank fishy, I'm gonna hide a half eaten can of tuna under their desk on a Friday night and see what they think on Monday after it has been rotting for an entire weekend. Also, everybody uses me as their time waster while they wait for their food to be cooked. "Hey I'll talk to Mota!"

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