Paging all possible ZFL Expansion Teams!

[illinifan999]

I'm going to add a page regarding the expansion situation, and need some info from the guys wanting a ZFL franchise,

I need:

City:
Nickname (narrowed down to 3):
Stadium name:
Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise:

That's all for now, if revrew or anyone else can think of anything else just post it here.

[RonnieDobbs]

I am one of the people who expressed an interest in expansion, but before filling this out a question: Originally, weren't the cities you could choose limited to a preset group? Is that no longer the case and we can choose any city we want? Just curious.

[NAIWF]

City: New York

Nickname (narrowed down to 3): Aristocracy, Rockerfellers, Trumps

Stadium name: The Upper Crust

Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise:

A group of faceless, nameless snobs who found that there is a good deal of money to be made in the sports industry. Since most non New Yorkers hate the teams from this city, why not embody the greed we're associated with. From the brochure trying to sell the ZFL on our team.

. . . There are no ushers at the arena, only butlers (in full Joe Millionaire/Fresh Prince of Bel Air attire). We simply will not allow common hoodlums into our games either. If your parents were not "somebodies" of the highest order, please do not waste our time in trying to procure tickets. As this endeavor is merely a write-off anyway, we do not really care if we win or lose games, as long as we make obscene amounts of money! Ciao, darlings.

(If you want me to write that bit up differently let me know)

[korme]

City: Cincinnati
Nickname (narrowed down to 3): Skylines
Stadium name: Riverfront Stadium (a tribute and a perfect name for Cincinnati)

Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise: Lamar "Bling Bling" Holliday is rich, but he won't let anyone outside of his 'posse' know why this is. Some say it's because of some 'jobs' he has done, who knows. But he's got mad ice and mad flow, he'll tell you. We only know that he would bring a different style to the ZFL.

[Coffee Warlord]

So long as you pay deference to the Portland, and acknowledge our mascot, the Sea Biscuit, as your lawful master, we shall get along well.

Otherwise I will send Erik Flamebeard of the Neither Here Nor There and Tim the Troll after you.

[JeeberD]

City: El Paso

Nicknames (narrowed down to 3): Miners, Cowboys, Generals

Stadium name: The Desert

Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise: JeeberD wasn't happy just being a starting CB for the Milwaukee MuscleMen. He wanted to be in charge of a team. He decided to use the overly generous singing bonus that DolphinFan foolishly gave him (and everyone wonders why they were the worst team in the league last year... ) and invest it in his own team. He felt that El Paso would be a great place for a new team, since that's his home town and because there's no competition for the football dollar there. JeeberD realizes that he's not going to be in the league as a player for very long, and he wants to make his mark in other areas of the ZFL arena...

[DolphinFan1]

Originally posted by JeeberD
City: El Paso

Nicknames (narrowed down to 3): Miners, Cowboys, Generals

Stadium name: The Desert

Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise: JeeberD wasn't happy just being a starting CB for the Milwaukee MuscleMen. He wanted to be in charge of a team. He decided to use the overly generous singing bonus that DolphinFan foolishly gave him (and everyone wonders why they were the worst team in the league last year... ) and invest it in his own team. He felt that El Paso would be a great place for a new team, since that's his home town and because there's no competition for the football dollar there. JeeberD realizes that he's not going to be in the league as a player for very long, and he wants to make his mark in other areas of the ZFL arena...

LOL

[bertogarce]

I'd love to be part of the league!

City: Denver, Colorado

Nickname (narrowed down to 3): Altitude, Stampede, Hippie Lettuce

Stadium name: 1.6093 Kilometer-Hi Stadium

Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise: Tired of living in his brother's shadow, Ron Elway, the lesser known and MUCH less-successful Elway brother, decides to beat his older bro at his own game. Organizing a group of investors comprised of other 2nd-fiddle brothers, including Bruce Buffer, Roger Clinton, Frank Stallone, etc., Ron Elway submits a bid to bring Denver its newest sports franchise. At his press conference announcing the expansion bid, Ron made the following comments, "John may have won a couple of Super Bowls for Denver, but what I'm going to do will make that seem like nothing. Ok, I'll take some questions…No, John will not be here today…Wait, why is everyone leaving!?!?"

[Katon]

Hard though it is to top that . . .

City: London, England

Nickname: Toffees, Gunners, Magpies

Stadium Name: Wembley Stadium

Owner: All that software magnate Gordon Way wants from life is to own a football team. If there aren't any available in England, he'll just get one in the States. After all, it's still the same game, right?

[illinifan999]

In light of recent evetnts.




Bump

[Nyarlahotep]

In light of the recent bump:


I would like to announce my bid for future expansion.

City: Arkham, Rhode Island

Possible Nicknames: Avengers, Elder Ones, Arkhamians

Stadium Name: Miskatonic Field

Notes about potential owner/s: Nyarlahotep showed up in Arkham with a soccer team a few months ago. No record of him before that has been found. His source (and amount) of his wealth is unknown. Rumors have surfaced that he been expanding his team's stadium in order to hide what is going on beneath the stadium. It is believed that he is searching for something, but if anyone knows what he is looking for, they have not made it known to the public. It is said that his soccer team's mascot ( who was unveiled shortly after his stadium expansion began) has a costume that is incredibly realistic looking.

[revrew]

Attention!

In the better interest of the league, commish revrew feels it is best to move through these issues swiftly and without the enflamed debates so common on these boards. Somebody has to step up and call the shots. Consequently, I am handing down some executive decisions. If you are a prospective expansion club owner or a current owner, heads up!

If you are a prospective owner, please have your team information submitted to this thread by 12 noon on Friday of this week. If you miss the cut, you miss this expansion opportunity. (Some of you, as can be seen above, have already met this requirement).

If you are a current owner, we will decide the expansion clubs by a vote. That vote begins on Friday at noon and will conclude on Monday at noon. I, too, will cast a vote in this decision.

Here are the voting guidelines:
1. Only the current 10 owners and the commish are permitted to vote.
2. Post your vote publicly on this thread.
3. Vote for 3 expansion clubs. The top two vote-getters will be awarded franchises.
4. Please keep in mind our desire is for owners that will participate actively, punctually, and with creativity. This is not a popularity contest, nor are we going to try to sort out "who asked first". That said, I would encourage you to give some weight to prospective owners who have participated in previous threads, but the league will stand by the outcome of the vote, regardless of your personal voting criteria.
5. Current or prospective owners who would like to "pull and Al Davis" and bitch and whine about why who voted for who or didn't vote for who can expect the commish to "pull a Bud Selig" and enforce punitive measures above and beyond reason. You didn't get voted for? Don't like how so and so voted? Tough.

Now, y'all can call me a forceful leader, a megalomaniacal SkyDog of the ZFL, or Paul Tagliabue. But as was said by some Confucious wannabe, "You no make-a da game, you no make-a da rules." I'm just trying to move beyond the petty griping and overkill discussions that these kinds of things often get bogged down in.

[illinifan999]

Revrew is my hero.

[John Galt]

Although I only recently discovered the beauty that is the ZFL, I'd like to throw my hat in the ring for an expansion team. Here is my proposal:

City: Independence, Missouri (aka Meth Capital of the USA)
Nickname: Crackheads, Speedfreaks, Juicers
Stadium Name: The Big Joint
Notes: The mysterious man who seeks ownership of a ZFL franchise is a true-believer of the worst sort. Upset with the other leagues hardline policies against drug use among athletes, he has sought out the only known sports league with no official drug policy, the ZFL. It seems this prospective owner believes that the problem with modern sports isn't the steroid epidemic, but rather that there isn't enough "juicing" going on. To promote his pro-drug beliefs, he seeks to form an entire team of addicts to prove once and for all that reality is for those people who can't handle their drugs. And we aren't just talking 'roids. Smack addicts, coke-fiends, and potheads will all be welcome. Any junkie will do and together they hope to form the worst "character" team in history, but they will win!

As for my activity level, I have never been involved in any dynasty, but I'm on this board WAY too much.

[JAG]

Just read through the ZFL threads and it looks like a good bit of fun. I'd like to toss in my bid for an expansion club...

City (State really): Vermont

Nickname (narrowed down to three): Green Mountain Boys, Teddy Bears, Ski

Stadium Name: The Big Chill

Notes about owner: Mape L. Syrup, a laconic and eccentric farmer from central Vermont, has waged a lengthy and mostly unknown campaign to bring the NFL to Vermont. After being rebuked time and time again for having only the 90th largest television market in the country (and that having Burlington generously lumped with Plattsburgh, NY), he thought his dreams of bringing professional football to Vermont was over. Hearing of the upstart ZFL, he quickly moved to establish a press conference.

Mape L. Syrup: (silence)

Reporter: Sir, is it true that you are submitting a bid for a ZFL expansion team?

Mape L. Syrup: Yup.

Reporter: And aren't you concerned about the ability of a state with only 550,000 people, most of whom care more about fully intact cows, to draw enough revenue to support a team?

Mape L. Syrup: Nope.

Two other notes have been learned through back channels. Syrup intends to have the day-to-day decisions of the team run by his cousin Larry, Larry's brother Daryl, and Larry's other brother Daryl. Secondly, if selected, he intends to bring in his neighbor, local 400 pound man Jerry Bennan, as his team's kicker (back of his jersey: Bennan, Jerry).

Thanks all

[BishopMVP]

City: Boston

Nickname: Braves (Tribute to all the old Boston teams, now the Atlanta Braves and Washington Redskins)

Stadium Name: King Philip Stadium (Everything else around here is named after somebody, and if I'm going to name the team the Braves, the stadium name should go to the most famous Chief.)

Owner: A reclusive genius not much is known about, the new owner reportedly said that this would "help him take over the text-sim universe, and then, the world!" But then again, he also was disgusted when the New England Patriots released Micheal Bishop and made Tom Brady the backup. Seriously, what does Bill Belichick know about offense?

Also, initial reports that a silent partner by the name of TexasPsycho would help "upgrade" the team to make them competitive in Season 1 are completely false.

[illinifan999]

Just a refresher course here are the rules:

A ZFL G.M.'s responsibilities are:
1. Name your team (subject to commissioner approval--profane or lewd names will not be permitted)
2. Name your "kicker" (explained later) -- something like Butch, Boris, Webster Slaughter, Princess Sofia, whatever.
3. Root for your team, including a trash-talking it up a bit against your opponents
4. Conduct the year-end drafts (this is the only time-intensive activity)
5. Trim the new year's roster as necessary
6. Make trades, if desired.
and 7. (optional) post your own logo, team events, or newsclippings, whatever. You're even welcome to name your own players. The more you put into the creative process, the more you will get out of being a GM.

[revrew]

It has been brought to my attention that the question of expansion hasn't truly been settled yet. Perhaps I've gotten ahead of myself a smidge. If current GMs would like to suggest thoughts on why or why not we should expand, I'm willing to open that debate. Then, when you vote by noon on Monday, please vote first on yes or no for expansion.

[Kodos]

Originally posted by illinifan999
I'm going to add a page regarding the expansion situation, and need some info from the guys wanting a ZFL franchise,

I need:

City:
Nickname (narrowed down to 3):
Stadium name:
Some notes about the group/wealthy person trying to obtain the franchise:

That's all for now, if revrew or anyone else can think of anything else just post it here.

In a surprise late bid to join the ZFL, former Gatesville GM Kodos, fresh from a firing at the hands of Bill Gates, has announced his desire to join the upstart ZFL league as an expansion team owner. Rumor has it that if Kodos' bid is successful, he plans to bring a team named the Marauders to tiny Rigel IV, Illinois (not North Dakota), located in the Northwest suburbs of Chicago. When asked how he would finance the team, Kodos replied with a smile: "There's lots of money to be had selling alien technology. I can assure you that Steve Jobs Stadium will be the jewel of the ZFL."

Originally posted by illinifan999
Just a refresher course here are the rules:

A ZFL G.M.'s responsibilities are:
1. Name your team (subject to commissioner approval--profane or lewd names will not be permitted) Rigel IV Marauders
2. Name your "kicker" (explained later) -- something like Butch, Boris, Webster Slaughter, Princess Sofia, whatever.
I would dub my kicker "Ikyck De Ballnow.
3. Root for your team, including a trash-talking it up a bit against your opponents This should be no problem against Marmot - I mean, Marmel.
4. Conduct the year-end drafts (this is the only time-intensive activity)
5. Trim the new year's roster as necessary
6. Make trades, if desired.
and
7. (optional) post your own logo, team events, or newsclippings, whatever. You're even welcome to name your own players. The more you put into the creative process, the more you will get out of being a GM. While creativity is not my forte, I shall do my best if selected.

[JAG]

Mape L. Syrup watched in stunned disbelief as Kodos announced his intention to bid for a ZFL expansion team. A scowl crossed his face and he rubbed his backside muttering, "Dadgum aliens and their dadgum probes."

[Kodos]

FWIW, I think some of the other guys should get more consideration in this than me. I just started following the ZFL in the last few days, and have not participated at all prior to that. Other guys are clearly more deserving.

[JAG]

I'm with you there. Regardless, I'm gonna follow this league anyway, it sounds like a lot of fun.

[Kodos]

After thinking about this some more, I say don't vote for me this time. Maybe at some future expansion, or if people drop out later, I can join up then. The other guys are more deserving. I don't want to steal anybody's spot.

[DolphinFan1]

Originally posted by Kodos
After thinking about this some more, I say don't vote for me this time. Maybe at some future expansion, or if people drop out later, I can join up then. The other guys are more deserving. I don't want to steal anybody's spot.

I think Kodos is using reverse psychology on us. Trying to look like the good guy. Nice try.

[Kodos]

Damn! They're onto me!

[revrew]

That's it! First deadline is up. Nominations for this year's batch of expansion teams are in. Current owners (and me)--you have until Monday noon to vote: first, on whether to proceed with expansion or not. secondly, vote for 3 teams. The top 2 will get franchises.

The candidates are:
NAIWF - New York
Shorty - Cincinatti
JeeberD - El Paso
bertograce - Denver
Katon - London
Nyarlahotep - Arkham, R.I.
John Galt - Independence, MO
JAG - Vermont
BishopMVP - Boston
Kodos - Rigel IV, IL


For the record, the first vote is cast as:
1. Yes, expand
2. bertograce - Denver
NAIWF - New York
JeeberD - El Paso

[Coffee Warlord]

The representative for the Portland Sea Biscuits, Erik Flamebeard of the Neither Here Nor There, delivers the team's vote.

Erik says expand good. Erik smash.

Erik is told to vote for NAIWF.
Erik is also told to vote for JeeberD.
Erik is also told to vote for John Galt.

Erik says that is all. Erik go smash.

[illinifan999]

The representative from the Chicago Eagles, Randy Steele, runs the team's vote in.

Eagles vote:
Yes to expansion

Eagles vote:
Katon-London
JeeberD- El Paso
NAIWF- New York

[Marmel]

LA votes no on expansion.
However, realizing that it will pass with flying colors, we would vote on the following three teams:

Shorty - Cincinnati
Jeeber - El Paso
Kodos - Rigel IV, IL

[digamma]

Knoxville votes no to expansion.

But if it passes:
Jeeber D
John Galt
Shorty

[The Afoci]

Fargo votes no to expansion if they get the first two picks,

JeeberD - El Paso
NAIWF - New York
Shorty - Cincinatti

[sachmo71]

San Antonio votes no to expansion

Shorty - Cincinatti
Katon - London
John Galt - Independence, MO

[DolphinFan1]

Milwaukee votes yes to expansion.

Berogarce- Denver
BishopMVP- Boston
JeeberD- El Paso

[Marmel]

I should have clarified and said I would vote YES, if they drafted AFTER the teams with sub .500 records. *shurg* I know it is pretty unfair to both sides on where they draft.....

[Kodos]

Marmel, your vote for me touched my heart in places I didn't know existed. Even though I said not to vote for me.

[JeeberD]

Wow, closer vote than I expected on whether to expand or not. I really hope that it passes. And if it does, it's looking pretty good for the El Paso franchise. No love from Satch, though. Geez, root against the Stars in one little series...

[Katon]

Current standings:

NAIWF - 4
Shorty - 6
JeeberD - 9
bertogarce - 3
Katon - 3
Nyarlahotep - 0
John Galt - 3
JAG - 0
BishopMVP - 1
Kodos - 1

There is one votes yet to come in. JeeberD and Shorty have already won spots.

The expansion vote stands at 5-4 in favor, excluding Fargo's conditional vote.

[bertogarce]

Wow, looks like I may need to polish up the 'ol concession speech. Guess that $1 bill I offered didn't sway many votes! Whatever the end result, I know I'll remain and avid fan of the league. Hopefully Ron Elway will get another shot a franchise down the line.

[tucker342]

Birmingham votes yes to expansion

JeeberD
Shorty
bertogarce

[John Galt]

Unless there is a last minute surge, it looks like Independence will have to wait for another year. Why can't I just get votes like I did in the Survivor "unpopularity" vote?

Anyway, assuming I don't win, please consider me for a future franchise and I'll keep reading the ZFL in the interim.

[sachmo71]

If there is expansion, how do we break the tie?

[Kodos]

Originally posted by bertogarce
Wow, looks like I may need to polish up the 'ol concession speech. Guess that $1 bill I offered didn't sway many votes! Whatever the end result, I know I'll remain and avid fan of the league. Hopefully Ron Elway will get another shot a franchise down the line.

If it makes you feel better, I thought your application writeup was the funniest of them all. Which gets you... nothing.

[Katon]

Ditto on all the concession speeches above - looks like I'm not going to win (I'm completely eliminated, in fact), but I'll still keep following the league, et cetera.

[revrew]

4 votes against expansion is more than I expected as well. The conditional voting I find needs to be addressed.

IF we expand....
And expansion teams are only offered 5 availables from each roster (I've already done the homework with some mock drafts), then no expansion club will have any player above a C+. In fact, their teams will consist of almost all F, D, and D+s. Even with the top overall pick, one team will be a guaranteed 0-9, the other 1-8 after beating the rival expansion club. Even weakling Fargo will toy with them. Possibly Fargo 42-0. It would be as long as 5 years before either expansion club could haul their butts out of last place. Frankly, to take away the top picks would create disparity almost beyond repair. Come draft day, the expansions would always be #1 and #2. Have and have-nots to the extreme.

Possible solutions??
1. Require the 5 exposed players to be starting players only, no kickers, no bench players. The expansion clubs would at least be given some glimmer of hope, and I could see letting them pick later than #1 and #2. Even so, they'd still be picking #1 and #2 the following year.
2. Allow the expansion clubs to draft more than once in each of the first 2 or 3 rounds. The only way they can hope to build a competitor is by getting some depth.
3. Other solutions?

The problem is the mathematical process by which game results are determined is completely unforgiving. No surprises. A team with only one good O-lineman will never score a running touchdown. Ever. A team without only one solid DT or LB will never stop an opponent. Ever. 11 straight weeks of 42-0 scores, except when the expansions play each other. And it would look like that for several consecutive seasons.

To only expose 5 players, 3 of whom will likely be bench players at best, and then not give the expansions top rookie picks is just way too crippling.

Now, if we wait a couple more seasons before expanding, many of the poor players will be weeded out. And if we set an age cap on the players that can be exposed, we might have a more equitable system.

These are things to consider while we're waiting for the last votes to come in. If the decision to expand is NO, then we will wait a season and try to hammer out details. If the decision is YES, we will still have to figure out how it works. In that case, hopefully we can work out a way that some of the NO voters will be more pleased.

[tucker342]

How about we can only protect 5 players

[NevStar]

I don't agree with the suggestion to only be able to expose starters. They should definately be able to draft first, along with possibly an additional pick in the 2nd round or so.

C. Montgomery Burns, new owner and despot of the Albequerque front office delivers the Isotopes votes

No to expansion. (Next season, provided no restrictions on unprotected players, we'll vote yes)

Katon-London
JeeberD- El Paso
Shorty-Cincy

[NAIWF]

By my count, I'm out on votes, and after seeing the incredible amount of hassle expansion is causing, you can knock me off of the list for the next round of additions. I'll be reading though, and as long as Chicago doesn't win the title again I'll be happy

[JeeberD]

So...say expansion fails in this vote. Do the two franchises with the most votes automatically get teams when expansion is voted in, or will there be another round of votes?

Of course, I guess I should hold this question off until/if expansion does fail, but this close vote is really making me anxious...

[illinifan999]

Originally posted by tucker342
How about we can only protect 5 players

I would much rather go with DolphinFans idea of the teams having to put a minimum of two C rated players.

And revrew, I only have one good O-Lineman, but Randy Steele gets it done on the ground.

[revrew]

Half of the current owners have voted no. I will not have my vote introduce change that half the league objects to. I'm changing mine to no, and that makes a majority against. Apparently the league isn't ready for expansion yet.

To Jeeber and others, I'm surprised and sorry. I think the current owners have made a mistake, but I'm hoping we can iron things out to see expansion after future seasons.

I will begin a draft thread next week so we can move on to season 3. Fargo can begin negotiating deals for that #1 spot, unless of course, they would like to keep the pick.