Top Ten Most Awkward Moments

[Vince]

Feel free to add your own as you see fit...

The goodbye at the end of an 'I'm breaking up with you' phone conversation.

[hukarez]

Hm.

Well, there was a time I was at a club in Newport Beach, and had been drinking since 4 in the afternoon. In any case, later that evening, I met a rather cute girl on the crowded dance floor.

A long story made short - on our way to the bar, I threw up on her and was promptly X'd out of the club. Surprising fact: she never knew, or was playing it off real good. Too bad the bouncer saw me!

[TargetPractice6]

Just listening to Suzy Kolber's interview with Joe Namath.

[Glengoyne]

OK here it is. Just after Valentines day a couple of years ago. My wife and I throw a dinner party for about ten other people. The guests included a few couples from our church, my in-laws, and the pastor and his wife. Now this awkward moment starts on Valentines day. My wife insists on leaving quite early to meet another couple for dinner. She also insists on driving. She drove to an adult novelty store. Well...WOW!! We go shopping, she had plans you see. After our purchases were made...well that is none of your business. Anyway fast forward to the dinner party. Our daughter is just shy of three years old, and quite mobile and talkative. She invites every single person at the party to her bedroom. Now she loves attention, and generally tries to get you to sit on her bed while she shuts the door to lock you in. At the end of the party, I walk into her room with her Grandmother. On the floor at the foot of her bed is a bright purple box. I think I recognize it, but since it is laying at the feet of my mother in law, I go into denial. As I get closer, I can read the dreaded news. "Orgasm Balls" in bright neon letters. I stooped down to pick it up, and caught my mother in law watching me out of the corner of my eye.

What the hell do you say to your mother in law when she catches you with evidence of a sex-toy and your wife, pastor, and father in law are in the next room? Add to that knowing that EVERYONE had been in that room, with that box lying there in plain sight. Brutal.

[hukarez]

OK here it is. Just after Valentines day a couple of years ago. My wife and I throw a dinner party for about ten other people. The guests included a few couples from our church, my in-laws, and the pastor and his wife. Now this awkward moment starts on Valentines day. My wife insists on leaving quite early to meet another couple for dinner. She also insists on driving. She drove to an adult novelty store. Well...WOW!! We go shopping, she had plans you see. After our purchases were made...well that is none of your business. Anyway fast forward to the dinner party. Our daughter is just shy of three years old, and quite mobile and talkative. She invites every single person at the party to her bedroom. Now she loves attention, and generally tries to get you to sit on her bed while she shuts the door to lock you in. At the end of the party, I walk into her room with her Grandmother. On the floor at the foot of her bed is a bright purple box. I think I recognize it, but since it is laying at the feet of my mother in law, I go into denial. As I get closer, I can read the dreaded news. "Orgasm Balls" in bright neon letters. I stooped down to pick it up, and caught my mother in law watching me out of the corner of my eye.

What the hell do you say to your mother in law when she catches you with evidence of a sex-toy and your wife, pastor, and father in law are in the next room? Add to that knowing that EVERYONE had been in that room, with that box lying there in plain sight. Brutal.
:eek:

In your daughter's room too!

[Vince]

Wow...

[Glengoyne]

:eek:

In your daughter's room too!Well how was I to know she'd see a pretty box in the garbage, and glom on to it.

EDIT to add: Oh my God!! Now I see what you mean in your qoute! That horrifying thought hadn't even crossed my mind. THANKS a bunch.

[SackAttack]

How about trying to explain this (http://www.cnn.com/2004/US/Southwest/01/23/nuclearweapon.tape.ap/index.html) to your supervisor?

[lcjjdnh]

I'll add two stories despite the fact we appear to already have a winner:

1-Three of my friends and I are driving and get stuck at a red light. So my one friend turns and goes, "Hey look at the hot girl in that car", so of course the three of us turn and look. Now as 4 17-year-old year kids start to stare at her, she notices, taps her boyfriend on the shoulder, who procedes to give us a look of death. This went on for the entire red light, which felt like the longest one I had ever been stuck at.

2-Very short but still funny and akward. My friend and I go to Dunkin' Donuts at like 11:30 at night and we see a car we which we think is one of our friends. So we pull up and get out to say something to them before realizing that it is in fact two of our teachers, one who lives over an hour from where we live. From the rest of their actions, we assumed they were a bit inebriated and just went inside laughing.

[Suicane75]

My best friend accidentaly saw my moms special area, that was a very uncomfortable moment for everyone.

[Maple Leafs]

I have a close friend who happens to be female and attractive, and for that reason my wife has hated for years. Things have actually been pretty good ever since we got married, but back in the day there were times I was just hoping the wife wouldn't just snap on her in public. The friend has nothing against my wife, but can pick up on my wife's dislike for her and doesn't really appreciate it. General tension all around.

One night at a party I was sent off the get drinks, and when I came back I couldn't find either the wife or the friend. I asked my other friends what happened to them, and they just shook their head and pointed. Fearing the worst, I turned around very slowly... to see the two of them, drunk and slow-dancing on the dancefloor.

That was awkward.

[JeeberD]

Awkward? That sounds pretty exciting to me. Don't tell me you didn't try to take advantage of that situation?!?!

[Maple Leafs]

Awkward? That sounds pretty exciting to me. Don't tell me you didn't try to take advantage of that situation?!?!I can't tell you tempting it is to delete my previous post, so that JeeberD will appear to be replying to the one directly above it.

[Suicane75]

I have a close friend who happens to be female and attractive, and for that reason my wife has hated for years. Things have actually been pretty good ever since we got married, but back in the day there were times I was just hoping the wife wouldn't just snap on her in public. The friend has nothing against my wife, but can pick up on my wife's dislike for her and doesn't really appreciate it. General tension all around.

One night at a party I was sent off the get drinks, and when I came back I couldn't find either the wife or the friend. I asked my other friends what happened to them, and they just shook their head and pointed. Fearing the worst, I turned around very slowly... to see the two of them, drunk and slow-dancing on the dancefloor.

That was awkward.

If by awkward you mean, every mans fantasy, then yes, that is what it was.

[JeeberD]

I can't tell you tempting it is to delete my previous post, so that JeeberD will appear to be replying to the one directly above it.

Bastard... :D

[Chief Rum]

My best friend accidentaly saw my moms special area, that was a very uncomfortable moment for everyone.

Tell your mom to quit baring her shoulder.

CR

[korme]

When your looking at porn and your Mom comes in.

Too many times.

[JeeberD]

When your looking at porn and your Mom comes in.

Too many times.

Aren't you going to mention getting drunk and showing off your package to that girl you had a crush on? ;) :D

[VIKING FAN]

awkward...lets see....how bout you're going to send your friend in the next department an email describing how the person in the cube next to you is so annoying.....and you're concentrating so much on his name....that without even noticing, you put HIS name in the address box and send it......

[Chief Rum]

Aren't you going to mention getting drunk and showing off your package to that girl you had a crush on? ;) :D

Reposted for posterity's sake.

shorty = kormelink3
neuqua = KKiTTLeS21

kormelink3 (1:02:24 AM): i hd a prob tnite
KKiTTLeS21 (1:02:29 AM): a problem?
kormelink3 (1:02:32 AM): Ye..thsi chcik i thoght she dig me
kormelink3 (1:02:37 AM): so i hit up on her door n sh camr up out
kormelink3 (1:02:46 AM): i whipt it out n she laghed.
kormelink3 (1:02:50 AM): said was smalls i got really mad
KKiTTLeS21 (1:03:03 AM): Damnit, shane that sucks.
kormelink3 (1:03:46 AM): no shoit
kormelink3 (1:03:48 AM): she start raggn asking me if i have a ruler wit mark at 2 inch line
kormelink3 (1:03:50 AM): called her bitch
KKiTTLeS21 (1:04:56 AM): ouch. why you flash her?
kormelink3 (1:05:05 AM): i told you thoght she likd me
KKiTTLeS21 (1:05:11 AM): guess you were wrong.
kormelink3 (1:05:13 AM): Yea
kormelink3 (1:05:15 AM): thinking about goin back tnigt
KKiTTLeS21 (1:05:16 AM): prob not a good idea
kormelink3 (1:05:21 AM): I luv her so much

Some might say, however, this was a clever ruse on the part of someone who knew both parties. ;)

CR

[Draft Dodger]

awkward...lets see....how bout you're going to send your friend in the next department an email describing how the person in the cube next to you is so annoying.....and you're concentrating so much on his name....that without even noticing, you put HIS name in the address box and send it......

or, sending a scathing e-mail complaining about a completely inept supervisor...to the supervisor in question.

(the way I talked my way out of it was pure comedy gold: after I sent it to him - by mistake - I sent it to the correct recipients. then I emailed him again to say "just wanted you to have a copy of an email I had sent; I didn't want to go behind your back on this. Figured the fair thing to do would be to send you a copy of the complaint I had made".)

[Neuqua]

Reposted for posterity's sake.

There are so many conversations that I can put up in this thread over the past few years of talking to a drunk Shorty.

[JeeberD]

Ahh, Chief Rum. That was beautiful, sir... :D

[korme]

Reposted for posterity's sake.

shorty = kormelink3
neuqua = KKiTTLeS21



Some might say, however, this was a clever ruse on the part of someone who knew both parties. ;)

CR

IT IS ALL LIES.

[JeeberD]

Two inches, eh?

*snicker*

[korme]

two times.... eleventeen?

[JeeberD]

millimeters

[Chief Rum]

IT IS ALL LIES.

The preceding tale of a teenage encounter is true. And by true, I mean false. It's all lies. But they're entertaining lies. And in the end, isn't that the real truth? The answer is: No.

CR

[korme]

Leonard Nimoy.