The 2004 Golden Scribes Award Show

[Kodos]

____________________ http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png ____________________




Despite the severe budget cuts which resulted from the exceptionally low Nielsen ratings that the First Annual Golden Scribes Award Show (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?t=5059) had garnered, the mood was upbeat at the site of the second annual award show. While the venerable Ed Sullivan Theater in New York City had been replaced as the site of the ceremony by the local Hooters of Vernon Hills, Illinois, the thirty or so people who were in attendance seemed to be enjoying themselves to some extent.

Standing on the Solecismic yellow carpet outside of the G-rated boobfest restaurant, Kodos, the self-elected President of the Golden Scribes Association, attempted in vain to convince the 2 or 3 local reporters who had bothered to show up that the event had only been moved in order to provide a "more intimate setting for the show." According to the alien, the fact that the first show had shattered U2's previously unreachable record as the lowest-rated primetime broadcast on a major network had not played a role in the decision. Finally, when asked if he had created the awards in a pathetic attempt to boost his low self-esteem, the alien had retreated hastily, saying that he wanted to "get some of those fabulous Hooters brand hot wings" before the show began.

With the show off to an inauspicious start, the attendees occupied themselves with ogling the young, buxom waitresses, and waited for the presentation of the first award...

[sabotai]

"Here To Stay" by Korn plays through an $80 stereo as the lights dim down. A spotlight
appears on a figure. It's Michael Buffer holding a microphone. Actually, it's not Michael Buffer,
but the night-time manager of the Hooters who just happens to kind of look like Michael Buffer and
does a pretty good job at impersonating his voice.

Night-Time Manager: (in Michael Buffer voice) Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome. We are here tonight
to acknowledge the fine dynasty writers of the FOFC. They are the most dedicated, most creative and
most..attention needy people at the FOFC. Ladies and Gentlement at the HOOTERS...this is the
UNDISPUTED, UNDEFEATED AWARD SHOW OF THE FOFC...THE ONE AND ONLY (thankfully), THE GOLDEN SCRIBE
AWARDS! AWARDS!

The music stops and the lights come on as sabotai steps out to present the first award.

sabotai

College football. What is college football? Well, it's football played by college students. Over
this past year, a couple of great college football dyansties, and a slew or horrible ones, have been
written out using various games for our enjoyment. Unfortunatly...mine was one of the horrible ones.
I say it was so artistic that people just didn't "get it".

And now presenting the College Football dynasties so uncreative, that everyone was able to "get it".

First off we have the Eastern Michigan University dynasty. This one was written by the king
of dynasty writing, Anxiety. At least in terms of quantity rather than quality. Surprisingly enough, this
dynasty was one in which Anxiety led the Eastern Michigan college football team. In this dynasty, Anxiety
showed that you can write an appealing, exiciting dynasty with as little text formatting as possible.

Second nominee is the Indiana: A Villege Challenge. A collaboration between several FOFC members,
the main ones being Alf, 3ric, Cornhuskerly, bigjdotcom and now most recently, cthomer5000. In this dynasty,
the members of the "village" take turns running the team. If this dynasty has tought us anything, it's
that no matter who is running the Indiana college football team, they will never get higher than 9th
in the rankings, and that they will only finish in the top 10 twice in their long, dreadful history.

Our 3rd nominee is another cthomer5000 dynasty, this one has been a solo effort much like his sex life.
Rutgers...the birthplace of college football is cthomer5000's own cure for being a real-life Rutgers
football fan. In this virtual world, Rutgers has become a dominate powerhouse. Luckily for the rest of
us, Rutgers will only ever be a dominate college football team in a virtual world.

Next we have the FOFC Glory II - Back In College dynasty written by our favorite pre-teen, Shorty.
In this dynasty, members of FOFC signed up to create a player in NCAA 2004 and we got to see if their
player got drafted by any of the teams in Madden.

Next is the NCAA FOFC Recruits Dynasty by Nyarlahotep. This was basically a copy-cat dynasty
of Shorty's FOFC Glory, except the big difference in that Nyarlahotep actually commited to it! I think
this one will lose points for the fact that The Afoci got drafted #4 overall.

Our last nominee is TCY: The 2003 Top Ten National Recruits written by thealmighty. The best
way to describe this dynasty is that it's like a "5 Great Men" dynasty with a size complex and compensates
by following 10 high school players and their college careers instead of 5. What's next thealmight,
recreating the entire history of boxing to compensa...anyway, THE WINNERS ARE!

For 3rd place and the Bronze Scribe...

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

We have a tie! Eastern Michigan Universit by Anxiety and NCAA FOFC Recruits by Nyarlahotep!

For 2nd place and the Silver Scribe...

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

Rutgers...the birthplace of college football by cthomer5000!

And the winner of the first Golden Scribe for 2004...

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Indiana: A Villege Challenge by Alf, 3ric, Cornhusterly, bigjdotcom and cthomer5000!

[tucker342]

Hey congrats you guys!:)

Enjoy this win as it looks like this will be the only thing that you guys ever win!:D

[Blade6119]

HEY KODOS!

Can you PM my results?...not sure i ever got them...

[Kodos]

HEY KODOS!

Can you PM my results?...not sure i ever got them...


Now you know the results in 2 categories, you lucky devil! ;)

[Tasan]

The smattering of applause dies down, and the Michael Buffer look alike Manager comes back out to the mic. "All right all right, we've got a schedule to keep here folks, keep the applause to a minimum." Somewhere in the back, we get a drum riff. "Next up, Tasan to present the Best Epic Dynasty!!" A couple of claps preceed Tasan as he ambles out to the stage, drink in one hand, the remains of a chicken wing in the other.

"This category is perhaps the oddest to have at a football gaming site, but also perhaps the most read of any of the the categories. Epic battles between man and alien, struggles of lowly countries trying to rise above themselves, tanks charging into the brink, space battles of immense proportions and societies growing from infancy all can be found here, with a passionate, and some times participating, readership following every word as if it was a work of Clancy or Crichton." He pauses to take a bite of the remaining wing, then follows with a sip of what appears to be a strong drink. "Whoa....thought I said double not triple....okay where was I. Oh yeah. The nominees for Best Epic Dynasty:

¡Bienvenidos a Tropico! by Its Vanilla - Set on a tiny tropical island, this Epic Dynasty follows the island of Tropico from the 50's to the 80's as it trys to grow into a Caribbean power. With great screenshots to add flavor for the reader, its a game-playing inspiration of a dynasty. Sadly, we only to into the 80's, and this may hurt voting.

EU2 Dynasty - The Saga of Granada by Anxiety - Another great Europa Universalis-flavored dynasty by Anxiety, the master of the sub-genre in my opinion. Anxiety assumes the role of a court advisor again, this time for the tiny Iberian country of Granada, sitting on the rock known as Gilbraltar. Anxiety uses his brief but deep writing style to give you all the information you need to follow him as he takes on Spain, France, the Papal States and more all the while expanding his territory. Once again though, we don't get to see this one all the way through to the end.

The FOFC Brigade by DataKing - One of the ever popular group participation dynasties, DataKing introduced modern warfare to the sub-genre. As Marines in World War II, DataKing led his group of tanks and infantry through the jungles of the South Pacific. Lots of great strategy in this one, and a personal favorite of mine. The comedy was there too, who could forget Radioman Boris, and the horrible XCom loaner radios?

Rise of the Remorhaz Society: A SEIV Dynasty by sachmo71 - Space Empires 4 is the game setting for this dynasty, as sachmo71 brings us a great space epic story, with several added sub-plots writen in for flavor. This is the one games on the list I haven't played personally, so to be honest this dynasty didn't catch my eye the first time through. sachmo71 did a great job writing this. He combines game elements with dialog and story lines to form a really compelling read. Alas, it succumbed to the fate of the previous 3 and following dynasty, and didn't go all the way to the end.

Superpower: A Civilization III Dynasty by Franklinnoble - This dynasty got me to pick up Civilization 3, plain and simple. Franklinnoble's setup descriptions set the tone for the dynasty's depth. He adds in screen shots and reader participation as he goes, and comes up with a great story element to spice up the writing. This dynasty spawned a sequel and a Play by Email game, which reminds me I've got a turn to play!

X-COM II: The Earth's Revenge by Godzilla Blitz - Now for the granddaddy of them all. I saved this one for last, so everyone wouldn't be bummed out and just quit reading the descriptions. The readership and participation of this one probably surpasses any other THREAD on the board, not to mention dynasty. Pages and pages of riviting story, from harrowing deeds by human aligned multi-tentacled aliens, to Skyranger pilots who need constant eye exams, this one has something for everyone. It had a slight hiatus last year, but is back as strong as ever for the final push to the alien lair on Mars. It will be a sad day when the story is over, but until then, we will continue to get great, pulse pounding reports from the battlefield and wit from the associated crowd. A masterpiece."

Tasan wipes the sweat from his brow, as the lighting in the building seems to be a litte strong on the impromptu stage area. He downs the rest of his drink, shakes his head violently, lets out a strong sigh, licks the remaining barbeque sauce from his fingers, and continues.

"And now, Joe, if you could give us something useful from those drums back there......"

"Bronze scribe for Best Epic Dynasty goes to.......
http://users3.ev1.net/~davidpr/bronzescribe.png
ITS A THREE WAY TIE!!! FOFC Brigade by DataKing, Rise of the Remorhaz by sachmo71, and Superpower by Franklinnoble!!!!!!"

The three guys saunter up to the podium, where they realize Kodos has been too cheap to by three statues, and they have to fight it out in a mudpit for the one trophy. DataKing comes out on top, so to speak, and grabs the trophy and hauls ass out the backdoor, screaming "Its mine Its MINE," as the other two collect themselves, wash off and sit back down, disgruntled.

"Well wasn't that interesting" quips Tasan, and the goes back to his cue cards.

"Silver scribe goes to.......
http://users3.ev1.net/~davidpr/silverscribe.png
EU2: The Saga of Granada by Anxiety!!!!!!!"

Anxiety nervously looks around the room to make sure nobody else is charging to the podium for this one, and then makes his way to the front to collect his trophy. He says a few words then heads back to his seat, uneasily.

"Someone get that man some Prozac!" Okay, the writing for this one was bad.

"And now, the one you've been waiting for, the Golden Scribe for Best Epic Dynasty goes to.........
http://users3.ev1.net/~davidpr/goldenscribe-gold.png
X-COM II: Earth's Revenge by Godzilla Blitz!!!!!!!!!"

The whole room goes nuts and everyone jumps to their feet in applause, oddly enough all wearing "Official X-Com Member" garb. Seems the place is packed with them tonight. GB comes to the stage to give his acceptance speech.

[sterlingice]

Maybe I'm blind but I think there should be a link thread from the main forum over here. I didn't even see this until two days in.

SI

[Alf]

Thanks for the Indiana TCY VC, I have been lazy lately but plan on getting back to it. You guys voting for us make me want to keep on !

[DataKing]

DataKing re-enters the Hooters, looking slightly disheveled but none the less very pleased with himself. He returns to his seat, apparently oblivious to the dagger-stares he receives from sachmo71 and Franklinnoble.

:D

[Kodos]

Maybe I'm blind but I think there should be a link thread from the main forum over here. I didn't even see this until two days in.

SI

There is one, but it's buried in the presenter's thread. I will post a more obvious one now. ;)

[Abe Sargent]

Dang, coming in second to GB's X-Com, that's like getting gold in a regular competition!


-Anxiety

[DataKing]

Dang, coming in second to GB's X-Com, that's like getting gold in a regular competition!


-Anxiety

Yeah, it's hardly fair having to go up against the likes of GB.

[Nyarlahotep]

Michael Buffer's long lost twin brother once again addresses the crowd. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to apoligize in advance for the presence of our next presenter and every table will recieve a complimentary order of wings for having to suffer through his being here. I'd also like to assure everyone that his racist tribute to the suburbs will not be taking place and emphasize that Hooters has a policy of hiring any suburbanite who is qualified." He gestures to the side of the stage. "Bring theat bastard out here."

Two burly men wearing bounty hunter jackets escort a handcuffed Nyarlahotep to the microphone amid a chorus of jeers. "Apparently my contract requires me to appear regardless of death threats." The crowd throws a generous amount of free wings at him. "I'd like to start off by saying that my scheduled performance was in no way intended to be racist, in fact I am half suburbanite myself." He hides behind the bounty hunters as the crowd throws chairs. "Anyways on to the nominees for the Golden Scribe Award for a baseball dynnasty."

"First up we have Marmel's Baseball History Revised. We got to see an alternate reality version of the league starting in 1911 done with OOTP5. It was a nice break to see theCubs as perennial contenders for at least a divisional title. Then JeeberD's upstart Astros showed up and ruined everything."

"Our second nominee is OOTP5-- Hangin' The Halos by Chief Rum. This is another OOTP5 dynasty, this time played in modern day. We were treated to a very thorough look at the Anaheim Angels' attempt to repeat as champs. Unfortunately they finished a disappointing two games under .500 and the hoped for CUbs and Red Sox Series didn't come about.

"SkyDog's OOTP5.13 Manager Career is our third enterant in this category. Marmel retold us the past, Chief Rum gave us the present, and SkyDog gave us a look at MLB half a century in the future. We got a nicely detailed look at 1 1/3 seasons of SkyDog's attempt to make Cincinnati one of the premier teams in baseball. Judging from the results of two drafts he was well on his way to doing just that.

"The Vincent Memorial League by Honolulu Blue. This is an OOTP4 dyansty set in a not too distant future where leagues have realigned into a tier system based off their financial standing with the ability for teams to be promoted and demoted based on performance. After simming a decade with these new rules he takes over the worst tem in the league and attempts to turn things around. Over about 20 years he is able to move them up to Division I and even made it to the Champion's Cup one year.

"Marmel gets a second nod for his What-If Baseball Series. We got to see the best of the best as he pitted the last 32 World Series winners against each other to see who was the best team. The A's and Yankees had strong representaation in the second round with each team having four former champs advance.

Nyarlahotep is handed an envelope by one of the bounty hunters. He quickly opens it as he looks out over the crowd.

"I would first like to say thanks for the Bronze Scribe for my NCAA dynasty and secondly say surburbanite power!!!"

As the crowd starts to get ugly, he quickly begins reading off the winners.

"The winner of the Broze Scribe is..."
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png
"The Vincent Memorial League by Honolulu Blue."

"Getting the Silver Scribe for the Best Baseball Dyanasty this year is..."
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png
"nobody."

"And the winner of the Golden Scribe is..."
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png
"Baseball History Revised by Marmel and OOTP5-- Hangin' The Halos by Chief Rum"

"Congatulations everyone and have a NOW!!!"

Nyarlahotep disappears in a puff of smoke as a group of scantily clad surburbanites run on stage and start dancing.

[Kodos]

That guy wasn't worth wasting my wings on... ;)

[DataKing]

DataKing examines the numerous wing sauce stains on the back of his jacket.

Hmmm...looks like sachmo71 and Franklinnoble have got pretty lousy aim. ;)

[Eaglesfan27]

This is hilarious... I never saw the first show. Now, I find myself going back and revisiting the past shows as I can find them via an exhaustive search.

[GoldenEagle]

This is hilarious... I never saw the first show. Now, I find myself going back and revisiting the past shows as I can find them via an exhaustive search.

Or you could click the link at the top of the thread. :D

[albionmoonlight]

*orders more hot wings and beer*

[Nyarlahotep]

That guy wasn't worth wasting my wings on... ;)


They were free. :p

[Franklinnoble]

DataKing examines the numerous wing sauce stains on the back of his jacket.

Hmmm...looks like sachmo71 and Franklinnoble have got pretty lousy aim. ;)

Bah. We only have to get close. The rhinocerous will pick up the scent and handle the rest.

[DataKing]

I'm pretty sure I don't wanna know...

[Godzilla Blitz]

Hey, thanks for the award!

It might be cliché to say so, but the dynasty truly is more of a group effort than it is something that I’ve done individually, and this award belongs to everyone who’s been a part of the thing from the start to its present state. The comments, additional fiction, and humor from others in the dynasty puts a funky edge on the whole thing; without it, the dynasty would have died a long time ago. And as always, credit should go to Vince for coming up with the idea. Thanks again!

Hey, is that a rhino at the door?

[Marmel]

Thanks and congrats to Chief. Great to share the Award with a terrific dynasty writer.

[The Afoci]

Do to my notes about each dynasty being at work and me being at home today, I will post the misfit one tomorrow.

[Nyarlahotep]

Suburbanite.

[Raven Hawk]

Hey where is everybody. I just went to the Vernon Hills Hooters for lunch. Something is amiss here . . . Maybe I'll try again tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the day after that.

And so on.

And so forth.

[Kodos]

:)

I figured some of the locals would actually know where the Hooters in question exists.

[DataKing]

Hey where is everybody. I just went to the Vernon Hills Hooters for lunch. Something is amiss here . . . Maybe I'll try again tomorrow.

And the next day.

And the day after that.

And so on.

And so forth.

Dammit boy, CALL ME the next time you're headed there...

:D

[Poli]

Ahem, and me. Well, DK has my number, anyway. :)

[Kodos]

Too bad their food isn't fit to serve to maggots... :D

[tucker342]

Congrats to GB! You deserved that one:D

And congrats to Marmel and Chief Rum! Both were great dynasties

[JeeberD]

Too bad their food isn't fit to serve to maggots... :D

Excuse me? Hooter's Ham and Cheese sandwich friggin rocks. As does the beer. Too bad everything there is overpriced... :(

Enjoying the show so far! Keep it up, boys!

[sabotai]

Where are all of the awards? It's already Tuesday and we've only had a couple. Let's GO people!

[Blade6119]

i should be up some time tomorrow...soccer dynasties take a long time to read

[Breeze]

Hey Sabs,

I think they are going slow to up the beer sales. I think Kodos is part owner of this joint. :D

[Kodos]

In that case, I've been investing a lot of money in myself. ;)

[The Afoci]

Now for the freaks who can’t write a dynasty that fits into any other category. These people are generally tortured people, which generally causes them to write dynasties for things no one else thinks about. But more often then not, these are some of the most entertaining ones. This year was no different. Now without further delay, let me bring up the three finalist, who will be tortured by the taunts of myself and everyone else until we announce the victor!

Our first finalist is Skydog and his Real Life Tucker Tigers Dynasty. Who could forget the ups of Tucker reaching the Georgiadome or the heartbreak when Thomas Brown broke his leg or when the clock ran out during the semifinals game? Many people will follow the group of players through the numerous colleges that they will attend. But we will all remember them as the kids Skydog tried to recruit for his church league basketball team.

Our second finalist is Honolulu Blue and his Know when to Hold’em Poker dynasty. We followed him as he tried to make the World Series of Poker, eventually did and then bowed out too early. He could be credited with the overabundance of Hold’em Poker threads on the board now-a-days.

Our third and final finalist is none other than Anxiety. His Dragon Den’s Studio dynasty is one of 1,345,643,217 dynasties he wrote last year, and features his simple, yet informative writing style. And how quickly “The Diary” became a worldwide number was shocking. So was his spending of 1 billion dollars so quickly, but who was counting?

Now the winner of the Bronze Golden Scribe…. Drum Roll…. Pawnshops get ready… This man looking for a way to finance his way back to the World Series of Poker…

Congratulations to Honolulu Blue!

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

As Honolulu Blue walks up to grab the trophy, he grabs the silver one too! He runs out screaming “Suckers!”

What luck! We didn’t have a silver medal winner! So now, it is time to have a death match to see who gets to take home the gold!

In this corner, Skydog, the Patriotic short wearing, guitar slinging, stud muffin. In this corner, Anxiety. Hmm…

Paper Rock Scissors war!

Round 1, begin!

Paper on both sides.

Round 2, begin!

Scissors on both sides.

Round 3, begin!

Rock on both sides.

The crowd ohhhhs and awwwwws. The two combatants stare deep into each others eyes. Suddenly they shake hands and raise the trophy together. Could this be a story made in California? Tune in next year. Congrats to both Skydog and Anxiety for the victory and bringing home the Gold!

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

[Kodos]

Nice presentation, The Afoci! But let's also give a nod to our other Island of Misfits finalists:

Hollywood Mogul Interactive Dynasty by Superman=#54;
Life in the Fast Lane by Honolulu Blue; and
Sabotai's How I Suck At Poker Dynasty!

This is my fault, as I only sent the medalists names in the PMs, but we can't forget the other deserving finalists! ;)

Sorry folks! :)

[Abe Sargent]

Congrats Skydog!

-Anxiety

[The Afoci]

Anxiety, no offense meant when I gave the big intro to SD and nothing for you. SD has banning powers, I figured I better suck up. ;)

[Abe Sargent]

Anxiety, no offense meant when I gave the big intro to SD and nothing for you. SD has banning powers, I figured I better suck up. ;)

I just figured that you were intimating that I was naked.

You do want me to be naked, don't you?

-Anxiety

[3ric]

Suddenly the air above the little space in the dingy corner that passes for a stage here in the Illinois-based Hooters restaurang buzzes with static. As the small crowd recoils from the shock, an image start to materialize - it's a live video feed from frigid Scandinavia, and it's the mild-mannered FOFC presenter known as 3Ric!

This can only mean one thing - it's time for the award in the ultimate geek-category: Best Add-On Utility!

<i>*bbzt* Welcome... *crackle* ...a pleasure... *static* (pause while downloading yet another Microsoft security patch for Windows XP) *static clears*</i>

"As I tried to say, I'm honored to be talking to you even though I couldn't be there in person. But it's fitting for this category that we can use a beta version of the IP hologram technology to broadcast this live using only a webcam, my laptop, and some shoestring! What this is about is to acknowledge the programmers that makes utilities to be used with FOF or TCY. Those utilities represent a vital part of our little community as the authors all share the fruit of their work with us all, to enhance the experience of the games. Without further ado, the nominees are:

- HeavyReign for his <b>FOF2004 League Generator.</b> A simple way to create a random universe to start a new game with.

- Taco for his <b>FOF2004 City Editor</b>. Allows full control to put any city you want into the game. Canadian, or even European cities are now possible.

- WheelsVT for his <b>FOF2004 GamePlanner</b>. Enables the gamer to separate parts of existing game plans and put them together in any combinations.

- MizzouRah for his <b>FOF2004 Logo 7 Pack</b>. The most extensive logo pack available for FOF, allowing you to choose between helmets or logos, retro or snazzy.

- Fido for his <b>FOF Reporter</b>. Already in use in many online leagues, and is surprisingly popular with solo players as well as you can store your career's full statistical history on your computer or a web server."

And the winner of the Bronze Scribe is...

*crackle*

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

<b>MizzouRah</b> for his Logo pack!

and the Silver Scribe award goes to...

*bzzzt*

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

<b>Taco</b> for the City Editor!

"...and now, the moment you've been waiting for..."

*image flickers and disappears*

The crowd sighs and boos. The empty stage is peppered with thrown peanuts. A Hooters waitress gets a phone call, steps in front of the stage and flashes the audience, getting the loudest cheers of the night so far.

*image flickers back into sight, showing 3Ric banging his fist on top of the camera*

"Ah, we're back on the air. As I was saying, the Golden Scribe award for best Add-on utility at FOFC for the year 2003 goes to..."

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

<b>Fido</b> for the FOF Reporter!

Congrats to all the winners and have a good time! Somebody have a beer on my behalf!

*bzzzt!*

[Godzilla Blitz]

Without further ado…

Groundbreaker of the Year

These awards go to dynasties that push the edge of the envelope, whether it be through creative or technical innovation. The finalists we have here today are the dynasty writers who have followed the beat of their own drums, who have dared to go where none of us have yet traveled, whose creative imaginations led them to look at a plain old dynasty, shake it up, and come out with something better, something new.

First, we have Everyone panic! The Crawfish have lasers!!!, by The Afoci. (camera pans to Afoci, who is sitting at a table with a bizarre collection of chanting soccer players with Crawfish flags). This “part Hattrick soccer dynasy, part acid trip, part dynasty of dynasty-like substance” is one of wildest, most twisted, and most hilarious pieces of writing to ever grace the FOFC dynasty boards.

Our second nominee is Enter The Matrix, by Franklinnoble. (camera pans to Franklinnoble, who is scrambling to change out of his “Civilization” T-Shirt.) This creative, participatory FOF/TCY dynasty drew high interest during its popular run last year, and has already garnered one award in this year’s ceremony.

Our third nominee is The 1970 Frederick Tequilas - An Experiment in Chemistry, by newcomer cuervo72 (camera pans quickly to cuervo, who is casually sipping, well—a Tequila). This dynasty created a fictional universe with strict chemistry rules, added in some amazing graphics, and spiced it up with outstanding writing to produce one of the year’s finest dynasties.

Our fourth nominee is prolific dynasty writer Anxiety’s My Dream Dynasty. (camera pans to Anxiety, who is, um, asleep at his table). Not a game dynasty, this collection of vivid, detailed dreams takes the term “dynasty” from “game recording” to “adventures in reality,” and is another creative example of how one is likely to find anything and everything in the dynasty forum.

Our last nominee, ZFL, by Revrew! (camera pans to revrew, who playing solitaire at his table—well, at least it looks like solitaire). This wildly popular, half card game, half football game has drawn enthusiastic support from its dedicated followers, and has had a long and popular run at FOFC.

Now, on to the awards…

Our Bronze Medal Winner….

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

Everyone Panic! The Crawfish have lasers, by Afoci!

Congratulations!

Our Silver Medal Winner…

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

ZFL, by Revrew

Congratulations!

And lastly, our Gold Medal Winner…

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Enter The Matrix, by Franklinnoble

Wow! Well done, Franklinnoble! Outstanding job!

And congratulations to all our other finalists this year! Your efforts have pushed the edge of the envelope! I’ve thoroughly enjoyed looking over the five dynasties that have been nominated for this award. Each one of them shows amazing creative talent.

[sterlingice]

I just figured that you were intimating that I was naked.

You do want me to be naked, don't you?

-Anxiety
The answer to this can be found on the "Top 10 List: Things not to Ask The Afoci".

SI

[tucker342]

LOL:D

Congrats to the winners so far!:D

[GoldenEagle]

(GoldenEagle stands up and heads to the stage. He has two beautiful Hooter girls, one on each arm. He is dressed out in a nice suit and tie. Someone teases him about being able to be in GQ. His hair is styled and he is wearing sunglasses.

GoldenEagle sees one of the chicken wings thrown earlier and picks up and begins eating it. He makes a comment to one of the girls about some three day rule.

He steps to the microphone and begins his speech.)

Good Evening.

My whores, excuse me - escorts, and I are here to present the award for the best Basketball dynasty.

Before we get to the nominations, I thought I would tell a little joke:

Kodos walks into a bar and asks, "Got any grapes?"

The Afoci (who is the bartender), confused, tells the Kodos that no, his bar doesn't serve grapes. Kodos thanks him and leaves.

The next day, the Kodos returns and says, "Got any grapes?"

Again, The Afoci tells him that, no, the bar does not serve grapes, has never served grapes, and, furthermore, will never serve grapes. Kodos, a little ruffled, thanks him and leaves.

The next day, Kodos returns, but before he can say anything, The Afoci begins to yell: ''Listen, Kodos! This is a bar! We do not serve grapes! If you ever ask for grapes again, I will nail your stupid tentacles to the bar!''

Kodos is silent for a moment, and then asks, ''Got any nails?''

Confused, The Afoci says no.

''Good!'' says Kodos. ''Got any grapes?

Now on to the nominations…..

First, is WussGawd’s “It Rhymes with Puke Dynasty.” The dynasty is used with Tournament Dreams Basketball and the writer does his best to run down the Duke basketball program. Does he succeed in his trying? I would advise you to check out the dynasty for yourself.

The second nomination is Marmel’s Fast Break College Basketball’s Colgate dynasty. Unfortunately, I left my Marmel jokes at home. All kidding aside, this is a great dynasty where Marmel attempts to take Colgate to the top. Check out the thread for more info.

Now for the winners…..

For third place and winner of the bronze trophy….
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

Unfortunately, there was not a nomination in this category. However, I have decided to use my presenter powers and reward it anyway. The award goes to Ronnie Dobbs for his work in the FBB Clippers dynasty.

For second place, and the silver trophy…

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

Marmel and his Colgate dynasty!

For the Golden Scribe in basketball, the winner is…..
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

WussGawd and the “It rhymes with Puke dynasty!!”

[Kodos]

For third place and winner of the bronze trophy….
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

Unfortunately, there was not a nomination in this category. However, I have decided to use my presenter powers and reward it anyway. The award goes to Ronnie Dobbs for his work in the FBB Clippers dynasty.


Nice use of presenter's license! And great joke!

[Denny Green]

I'll have something for everyone sometime tomorrow afternoon. Sorry I haven't had a chance to speak yet.

[tucker342]

Congrats Wussgawd!:D

[WussGawd]

Congrats Wussgawd!:D

Thanks much! I guess this means I ought to dust this puppy off and finish it.

[Kodos]

Hey presenters. I've had some guys asking about being able to put up presentations later. It's no problem at all as far as I'm concerned. It was just a guideline. If real life interferes, go ahead and put the golden scribe presentation aside until you have some free time. I promise I won't get mad! :)

This whole thing is supposed to be about fun and recognizing people's hard work, so don't stress out at all if you have to do yours a bit late. Nobody's going to mind. :cool:

[sterlingice]

Hey presenters. I've had some guys asking about being able to put up presentations later. It's no problem at all as far as I'm concerned. It was just a guideline. If real life interferes, go ahead and put the golden scribe presentation aside until you have some free time. I promise I won't get mad! :)
By that token, the visual presentation will be on either Friday or Saturday. Blame school. :mad:

SI

[The Afoci]

Sweet, a Bronze Golden Scribe! I wonder what they go for on ebay!

[revrew]

The ZFL would like to thank its fans, financial supporters, players, managers...and lovely award presenters. Once again, thank you.

[Franklinnoble]

Without further ado…

Groundbreaker of the Year

...

And lastly, our Gold Medal Winner…

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Enter The Matrix, by Franklinnoble

Wow! Well done, Franklinnoble! Outstanding job!

And congratulations to all our other finalists this year! Your efforts have pushed the edge of the envelope! I’ve thoroughly enjoyed looking over the five dynasties that have been nominated for this award. Each one of them shows amazing creative talent.

Wow... you like me! You really, really like me!

[Airhog]

Rushing onto stage after everyone has already left. Of course this is three days later. Wait, is there even a stage? Not that it matters much. I would have thought I could have gotten a decent dynasty this year, instead of this crap called hattrick...err wait this mic is on? Well Im very excited to be presenting this award for the best hattrick dynasty. Let's take a look at our nominees

Best Hattrick Dynasty

Everyone panic! The Crawfish have lasers!!! (The Afoci)

I personally think that this dynasty should win based on its title alone. Crawfish with laser's, who would have thought that

Maniacal Misfitz HT Dynasty (Havok)
I'm not to familiar with this dynasty, but maybe if i read these great dynasties my team wouldnt suck so bad in hattrick.

c. NE Oklahoma Sidekicks (vexroid)

This dynasty strikes close to home. No literally this guy lives down the stree from me. He's always shouting late at night about having crawfish hanging from his nutsack. But I have no idea what that means. Maybe its just inspiration to writing a big dynasty.

d. Screamin’ Seamen Football Club (DataKing)

There is'nt much you can say about this dynasty. Its an old dynstay which probably makes it better. Or maybe it just makes it older. You'll have to read it to find out.

Now then lets get down to the business of handing out awards.


The award that was good enough to make the ballot, but nobody voted for was....

Hmm, it seems I only have gold and silver winners but no bronze. How about I let the drunk guy in the dumpster next to us pick the award. Guy in Dumpster "mumbles"
Well now, that was quite an interesting choice. Something about rat stew. Hmm im not sure how that figures into our awards presentation.

So winning the silver in this category is.....









Silver: Screamin' Seamen
Its such an old dynasty, parts of it are still in latin
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png



And Taking home the gold in this category....

THE AFOCI!!!!
And no, im not just saying that because i have a crawfish attached to my nutsack.
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png




Wait a second folks. I have just recieved latebreak information that indeed there was a bronze winner. And the winner is

Airhog!
I can't believe my redneck dynasty won
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

Hmm why is security coming up here, maybe they want their picture taking with a GSA bronzr winner. Security grabs Airhog and escorts him out of the building after smashing his bronze statue over his head.

Its been fun folks, and until next year....Keep Writin them dynasties

[Kodos]

I'm pretty sure awarding yourself with a trophy in a category you weren't a finalist for is against our Golden Scribe Association constitution.

But I'll have to check. Chubby may have written it. ;)

[Airhog]

If thats the case, I should have awarded myself the gold :D

[vex]

The Sidekicks 4 fans were seen rioting outside The Redneck Trailer in protest that they stole the Kicks bronze!;)

[DataKing]

E pluribus hattrickum

[The Afoci]

Hey, my golden scribe is only gold plated!

Thanks guys, who would have guessed all the late night drinking and drugs would have such benifits!

[Kodos]

Hey, my golden scribe is only gold plated!

Thanks guys, who would have guessed all the late night drinking and drugs would have such benifits!

Keith Richards, maybe?

[The Afoci]

Good point. Does this mean I will write weird dynasties until I am about 40 and then just kind of live off the earlier ones until I am 109?

[revrew]

Good point. Does this mean I will write weird dynasties until I am about 40 and then just kind of live off the earlier ones until I am 109?

Well, that's what Kodos is doing. (hint, hint, get Gatesville back up again, hint)

[Kodos]

Well, that's what Kodos is doing. (hint, hint, get Gatesville back up again, hint)


revrew. Master of subtlety. :)

[cthomer5000]

Wow. Thanks for the award guys! I really feel like i have to pick up my Rutgers dynasty again and lead it to some logical conclusion...

[Kodos]

Nah, people like it when you leave dynasties incomplete! :D

[tucker342]

Well, that's what Kodos is doing. (hint, hint, get Gatesville back up again, hint)

lol:D

[Grid Iron]

Something came up at work, so I'm going to do this award Friday afternoon, about 4-6pm PST. Sorry to all the deserving nominees. :(

[Kodos]

No problemo. I have it on good authority that some awards may not be presented until Wednesday or later. No big hurry folks! Do it when you have time, and don't worry if you won't have time for a few days. We can wait. :)

[Glengoyne]

[approaches the microphone]

Good Evening everyone. I am glad to be here tonight to help present the Golden Scribe awards for the Category "Other Sports Dynasty". Let me see where did I put that list of Nominees? Uhhm, I'd like to take this time honor my favorite all time Hooters Girl. I'd like to lift a toast to Tara from the Little Rock Arkansas franchise. I found her and her hula hoop routine to be quite ..ehr... inspirational. This one's for you Tara!.

Allright Now that that is out of the way. Here are our Nominees.

FOFC Boxing (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10284) by Breeze

The highlight amongst many highlights of this dynasty was the Title bout of the Irish Latino boxer Pancho O'Kelly(Bertograce). I would be remiss not to mention the antics of trainer Joe Bagodonuts as well. I thought the thread picked up quite a bit once "Razor" Blade stopped getting knocked out quite so often. This was one of those dynasties that got me interested enough to enquire about the game driving the story. I was pleasantly surprised that it is a freebee. Very nice indeed.

Second up is
FOFC Winston Cup (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=8492) by gold101/Render

This was an entertaining read. I was really pulling for JeeberD in the Rookie of the Year competition, but he came up short after leading with two races to go. As the season opened I thought everyone would be chasing the Snow man, Chris Snow(Render I believe my notes are incomplete), but he was no where to be found at the end of the season. The highlights of this dynasty were just like any other day at the track, the accidents. The pictures were a nice touch.

The third Nominee is
QPP - The QuikSand Ranch rides, yet again (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10342) by QuikSand

Here we read about the exploits of QuickSand's stable. An interesting and relatively successful bunch. Most noteworthy is "Two Right Feet", I thought that was a pretty clever name until I realized that all horses have two right feet. Then I reconsidered and decided that it was clever after all, I think Quicksand just has that effect on people. In any case the likes of Two Right Feet, Dark Eagle, and Chick Burr won and lost many a race throughout this dynasty. I think the mix of raw data, in the familiar past performace format, and commentary was very effective in keeping the reader up to speed without overwhelming them.

That brings us to
Tiger Beware: A T.W. PGA Tour Dynasty (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=11894) by thealmighty

I somehow missed the PGA tour Dynasty in the title of this thread, and opened it up fully expecting to read a safari hunting dynasty. Instead I was pleasantly surprised to be able to follow the one the only theallmighty through the ups and downs of a PGA season. Most of the reader feedback to this thread seemed to be folks saying that after reading they just had to go pick up the game for themselves. Pretty high praise indeed.

Last but not least is

Sab Recreates Boxing History (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=15149) by sabotai
This dynasty was fast paced, fact filled and all business. After reading this I am looking forward to his promised next edition where he will continue remaking history with a new version of the game. Among the things I learned in this dynasty was that John L Sullivan fought a good thirty years before I thought he did. I was off by two whole generations. Since my understanding of boxing history gets fuzzy about the time Roy Jones was robbed in Korea, I really appreciated this one.

Allrighty then. Let's get this show back on the road here. The Bronze Trophy winner is


Here in this thicker that usual Envelope. We have a tie.
[Struggles with the envelope] While I do this take a look at the trophy.
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

Breeze and Sabotai are left to duke it out for a single trophy as
FOFC Boxing & Sab Recreates Boxing bring home the bronze.


The Silver Scribe goes to
http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

Thealmighty for Tiger Beware



OKAY that leaves us one trophy, and a couple of deserving Dynasties and authors. I guess this one will be a photo finish, as that perm applies to each of "other" sports.
The winner of the Gold Golden Scribe award for The Category "Other Sport Dynasty" is...
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http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png


FOFC Winston Cup Racing by Gold101 and Render


Very nice job fellas, congratulations are in order.

Really all of these dynasties were deserving in my mind. I enjoyed reading each one in preparation for tonight. My Congratulations to all of the nominees! Dynasty writing is hard work, and you should enjoy the recognition you earned.

[Abe Sargent]

Anxiety: I’m about to go on, I need to find my script. Script. Oh Scriptie! Where are you? Hey, Cthomer, you seen my script?

Cthomer5000: How did you pronounce my name again?

Anxiety: You know, Cthomer. “KTH-oh-mer” Much like that evil entity Cthulhu in H.P. Lovecraft’s world.

Cthomer5000: You mean, you do not pronounce it “See-Tho-mer” or ‘Cee-Tee-Ho-mer?”

Anxiety: Nope. It’s like ISiddiqui, which is pronounced “Ih-Sih-Dih-KWI” It remind me of another Cthulhu Mythos creature, Ithaqua, the Wind Walker.

Cthomer5000: You are a very weird man. (Cthomer5000 walks away)

Anxiety: I need to find my script. Hey, stkelly! Have you seen my script?

stkelly52: I don’t anybody has ever pronounced my name “SSTT-kell-ee” It’s Saint Kelly!

Anxiety: If it was Saint Kelly, then why doesn’t your name read St.Kelly52, eh? Is my script under this couch?

stkelly52: (mumbles to himself) I swear, he couldn’t be more psychotic

Anxiety: Excuse me, NAIWF? I can’t seem to find my script, have you seen it by any chance?

NAIWF: You pronounced my name “Nay-wf” Cute. Who else have you talked you.

Anxiety: Oh, you know, the regular bunch of guys. stkelly and Cthomer.

NAIWF: Bless you!

Anxiety: No, that wasn’t a sneeze…oh, nevermind. I also talked to cuervo72 (“Quare-voe”), and bbor (“buh-bor”), and then I spoke to WSUCougar (“Woo-soo-coo-gar”), an don’t forget rkmsuf (I don’t even want to know).

NAIWF: Did you ask Kodos (“Koe-dose”)? Maybe he was proofreading it?

Anxiety: Ah yes, that’s it! Thanks a bunch! You’re a super pal!



Off Stage Announcer: Ladies and gentleman, the time has come for the presentation of the Best Front Office Football Dynasty of the Year! Please welcome your host, Anxiety!

Anxiety: Thank you, thank you. I am honored to present this award tonight. You know, the sponsor for tonight’s show is none other than Front Office Football Central. Not TPF Central, not Hollywood Mogul Central, not Hattrick Central (Although sometimes it feels that way!. Can I get an Amen?), not Championship Manager Central, but FOF Central!

There is a lot of competition for the Front Office Football Award. With so much competition, you can be sure that this year’s nominees represent the best of the best. Anyways, without further ado, allow me to present the nominees:


Off Stage Announcer: (Cuts in when the video of the dynasties starts up) From The Bill Gates Challenge, its Kodos! This long standing dynasty plots the attempts of one man and his liege to take down the Evil One through a neighboring football team.

Bringing us the newest in modifications, Franklinnoble’s Enter the Matrix! Evil beings from the future use Football as a way to placate the masses! Enjoy it in all of its gory detail.

We go down south for the third nominee with cuervo72’s The 1970 Frederick Tequilas - An Experiment in Chemistry. A dynasty with a bit of flavor, must operate under a single sign. The stars have to align for the Tequilas to shine!

The next entry comes from the venerable QuikSand, with a bit of help from others, with his GroupThink 3 - Sizing up the Kitty Hawk Flyers. Taking the Flyers into the 2020’s, this team has to try and defeat their division rivals – Athens, Mazatlan, and Bermuda.

Next we have Iowegian Legion: 2k1 Des Moines Dragons, by none other than revrew. Can a professional football team composed of all Iowans go anywhere?

And then lastly, Grid Iron brings us The Nebraska Blizzards. Also stepping into the fire starting in 2020, The Blizzards fight through a season with a tough schedule – will the Colts stop them from seeing glory?


So, without further ado, the Bronze Scribe for Best FOF Dynasty goes to…..


http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

Franklinnoble for his Enter the Matrix Dynasty! Come on down FN!

Franklinnoble: I just want everybody to know that I love you all. This is for YOU!!!

Anxiety: Whoa there, a little emotional buddy. Alright, the Silver Scribe for Best FOF Dynasty goes to…….

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

Wait a second….I am being told by the control room that we do not HAVE a Silver Award winner tonight. And that can only mean one thing. We have a tie for the GOLD! Our winners are……….



……………


…………..

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png


Grid Iron’s The Nebraska Blizzards and Kodos with his Bill Gates Challenge!!! We only have one physical award, and since Kodos is running the show and can turn in a requisition for another award, we’ll give this trophy to Grid Iron.

Grid Iron: This ain’t what this is supposed to be about. I watched my daughter play soccer yesterday and it. (sniff) it was the greatest thing. That is what it is all about….”

Anxiety: Can we uh, get Kodos up here or something.

Kodos: …..so a big up yours from Rigel to you! (Kodos flips off the audience with a tentacle). Won’t give ME a frickin’ trophy….

Anxiety: And that does it for this year’s FOF Dynasty Award. A round of applause for all of our winners, all of our nominees, and everybody who turned in an FOF dynasty this past year. You are all winners. Except that you all lost except for these three guys. Losers.








Tentacle Flipping causes FCC Investigation

Masaki Oleh
Daily News

An uproar caused yesterday by Rigellian Kodos during the Golden Scribe Awards show. The Rigillian won the award for Best Front Office Football Dynasty in 2003, but because he tied another nominee for the award, he did not receive the physical trophy. As such, he made an obscene gesture.

Today, hundreds of phone calls poured into the FCC offices from irate parents, teachers, and pornographers who don’t want to give it away for free. FCC Chairman Steve Swellcock addressed this issue:

“We simply cannot have this sort of debauchery on our televisions. What’s next? Rigellian tentacles used as dildos and marketed to our children? We must stop this smut through any means possible”

Meanwhile, FOFC has declared that all future Golden Scribe broadcasts will run on a tape delay to prevent further incident.

[sterlingice]

Great presentation Anxiety. Anyways, I should have mine up this evening after I get back from class.

SI

[Abe Sargent]

Thanks!

-Anxiety

[revrew]

Nuts...knew I shouldn't have dropped the Legion. Had it kept going...

Oh, well. Couldn't do the Legion and the ZFL at the same time.

[Grid Iron]

We have a tie for the GOLD! Our winners are……….

Grid Iron’s The Nebraska Blizzards and Kodos with his Bill Gates Challenge!!! We only have one physical award, and since Kodos is running the show and can turn in a requisition for another award, we’ll give this trophy to Grid Iron.


Wow! :D I can't believe it! I was just hoping for a bronze. This is so awesome. I'm honored to be mentioned alongside Kodos, one of the best dynasty writers here at FOFC.

Thanks for all those who voted for me. I'm off to the bar for a celebratory drink. After I throw a few back, I'll do the Rookie of the Year presentation. . .

[Chief Rum]

I just got back from a fight with a seat filler who didn't recognize me and noticed I won an award while I was away. My first gold! Congrats to Marm, with whom I share the award for both of our great baseball dynasties. I'm happy to see that a little detail didn't scare anyone away from my Halos dynasty.

Of course, as good as the Halos dynasty was, I find it ironic I wona gold for it when my best dynasty by far, Medieval Total War in Poland, only ended up with a silver last year (that's what happens when you go up against the behemoth known as X-Com).

CR

[tucker342]

Congrats to Gold101, Render, Kodos and Grid Iron!:D

And also to every one else that was nominated!

[Grid Iron]

<h3>Rookie Dynasty Writer of the Year Award</h3>
February 20, 2004


<b>Kodos</b>: And now, ladies and gentlemen, presenting the Rookie Dynasty Writer of the Year Award, ESPN broadcaster <b>Suzy Kolber</b> and co-winner of this year’s Football Dynasty of the Year, <b><b>Grid Iron</b></b>!

[Applause]

<b>Kodos</b>: Where the hell is Grid Iron?

<b>Suzy</b>: At the bar. Celebrating.

<b>Kodos</b>: Grid!!!

<b>Grid Iron</b>: (whispering to a Hooters waitress) No, it REALLY IS (*hick!*) that long!

<b>Kodos</b>: The award, Grid!

<b>Grid Iron</b>: Wha? Oh, yeah. . tha’ward cerebony . . (*hick!*). Stay right here, honey, I got a little Golden Scribe in my pocket fur youuuuu. . . (*hick!*).

<b>Fritz</b>: What’s your favorite flavor tonight, Ice Cream Man, Daquiri Ice?

[Grid Iron falls to the ground, collects himself and shuffles slowly onto the stage]

<b>Suzy</b>: Good evening, Grid!

[Grid Iron is slowly swaying from side-to-side with his eyes closed]

<b>Grid Iron</b>: Wha?!?!

<b>Suzy</b>: Good evening, Grid!

<b>Grid Iron</b>: Oh, hallo there, Suuuuuuuzie! (*hick!*) You look greaaaaat to-NIGHT! Ow!

<b>Suzy</b>: Uh, thanks Grid. Shall we introduce the nominees for FOFC Rookie Dynasty Poster of the Year?

<b>Grid Iron</b>: I WON!!! I WON!!! AND ALL YOU FU*%ERS CAN NEVER TAKE IT AWAY FROM ME!!! WOO HOO!!! (*hick!*)

<b>Suzy</b>: That’s right, Grid, but now we need to give an award to someone else, OK?

[Grid Iron looks longingly at Suzy Kolber]

<b>Suzy</b>: You OK, Grid?

<b>Grid Iron</b>: I want to kiss you.

[Grid Iron leans toward Suzy]

<b>Suzy</b>: Thanks, Grid, but that’s not much of a compliment. Anyway, back to the awards. . .

[Suzy smacks Grid Iron in the head, and he falls over]

<b>Grid Iron</b>: Geeez, wha’d ya do tha’ for, Suuuuuzeeeey?

<b>Suzy</b>: We need to do the awards, Grid.

[Grid Iron collects himself again and stands up]

<b>Grid Iron</b>: Right, the awards. . .

<b>Suzy</b>: And the nominees are. . .

<b>Grid Iron</b>: <b>MTAYSTL03</b> is the first nominaaaeee! (*hick!*) Yahooooo!

<b>Suzy</b>: No he’s not, Grid. He wasn’t a nominee because he never wrote a dynasty before the voting began.

<b>Grid Iron</b>: He didna’? (*belch*)

<b>Suzy</b>: No, he wasn’t eligible to win the award. Maybe next year.

<b>Grid Iron</b>: But I like Five Great Players (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/~fof/forums/showthread.php?t=21347) so much!!!

<b>Suzy</b>: I know you do. . .

<b>Grid Iron</b>: Maybe next year?

<b>Suzy</b>: Maybe. . .

<b>Grid Iron</b>: OK.

[Grid Iron suddenly passes out on the stage]

<b>Fritz</b>: OK, rummy, back to the freezer for you. . .

[Fritz and his “security detail” (thugs from Anchorage, Alaska), drag Grid into the back room]

<b>Kodos</b>: Now presenting the Rookie of the Year Award with Suzy Kolber is NFL great <b>Joe Namath</b>!

<b>Joe</b>: Hi Suzy. Nice to see you again.

<b>Suzy</b>: Hi, Joe!

<b>Joe</b>: What a creep that guy is, huh? There’s just absolutely no excuse for something like that to happen.

<b>Suzy</b>: Thanks, Joe. I agree.

<b>Joe</b>: Anyway, where shall we begin?

<b>Suzy</b>: Announcing the nominees.

<b>Joe</b>: The nominees for FOFC Rookie of the Year are. . .

<b>Suzy</b>: <b>The Afoci</b>, for his captivating <b>Hattrick Fighting Crawfish</b> and <b>Real Life Flag Football</b> dynasties!

<b>Joe</b>: For the tantalizing <b>Frederick Tequilas</b> dynasty, <b>Cuervo72</b>!

<b>Suzy</b>: For the ground-breaking <b>ZFL</b> dynasty, <b>Revew</b>!

<b>Joe</b>: The final nominee is <b>Breeze</b>, for his action-packed <b>WeBL Boxing League</b> dynasty!

<b>Suzy</b>: They’re all great dynasties, aren’t they, Joe?

<b>Joe</b>: You betcha, Suzy. I follow all of them religiously.

<b>Suzy</b>: I wish they could all win. Well, here we go. . .

<b>Joe</b>: And the <b>Bronze Scribe</b> winner is . . .

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http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

<b>Cuervo72!</b>

[Applause]

<b>Suzy</b>: Well, it’s down to The Afoci, Revrew and Breeze!

<b>Joe</b>: And the <b>Silver Scribe</b> winner is . . .

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http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png


<b>Joe</b>: There is no <b>Silver Scribe!</b> We have a tie for first place!!!

<b>Suzy</b>: And the <b>Golden Scribe</b> winners are . . .

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<b>HOLD YOUR BREATH, ‘CAUSE HERE IT COMES!!!</b>

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http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

<b>THE AFOCI AND REVREW!!!</b>

<b>Joe:</b>: Congratulations, guys, you deserve it!

[Applause]

[Camera sweeps over the audience and then back to the stage, where The Afoci and Revrew have started rolling around on the ground, struggling for the Golden Scribe trophy]

<b>Suzy</b>: Congratulations to all the nominees, it was a very difficult race!

[More applause]

<b>Joe</b>: Hey, Suzy, wanna come up to my room?

[Suzy punches Joe out, sending him to the floor]

<b>Joe</b>: What'd I say? What'd I say?

End of Transcript.

[The Afoci]

I could take Revrew. I mean, the man has to be 100 with as many kids as he has. ;) :D

Well, heres to next years letdown for me!

Thanks to all who voted and congrats Rev!

[sterlingice]

Argh, sorry for the delay but it's been one of those weekends. Tuesday afternoon, the Visual Presentation award will be posted.

SI

[tucker342]

Great write up Grid Iron:D

Congrats to The Afoci and Revrew!:D

[sabotai]

Thanks for the Bronze Scribe everyone. I didn't think I had much of a shot at it with that group of fine dynasties. In fact, I think QS got robbed, but then again his Ranch dynasty wasn't that long before he gave up on it because of problems with the game.

And I haven't even begun to scratch the surface of boxing history with the new one. Perhaps I'll grab the Gold next year...

Thanks again, and there's a lot more boxing history to recreate.

[revrew]

I could take Revrew. I mean, the man has to be 100 with as many kids as he has. ;) :D

Well, heres to next years letdown for me!

Thanks to all who voted and congrats Rev!

With Fargo's sterling record of accomplishment in the ZFL, I'm surprised to hear you talk, T.A.

Oh, and by the way, I'm not even 30 yet. Bring it on.

[The Afoci]

Bring it on.

I got nothing.

[FargoFreez aka fof playa]

Okay, so I'm pissed. I accidentily closed my IE in which I was doing my presentation and just lost everything. It was long and I just can't fathom the idea of rewriting it. I'm sorry Kodos/ nominees. I won't be able to do the "Best TCY Dynasty" category any good, so hopefully some arrangement can be made.

[Kodos]

Note: This is being posted on behalf of MrBug708, who is away from the land of computers. It would have been posted sooner, but I had to go out of town unexpectedly last Friday and just got back tonight. I will figure out what is going on with other problems in the next few days.

- Kodos :)

The Dynasty of the year, is generally thought of to be one where the poster 1) They don't give up on it after a week *ahem* Golden Eagle 2) Get a lot of participation, whether it's random childish, and subliminal rankings by those of Easy Mac and The Afoci and the every popular, Fritz and 3) Just need to have one kickass title.

The nominee's include

Wolfpack's 2002 117-Team 1-A Dynasty where he let USC get WAY to far in my opinion.

Screamin' Seamen football club by Dataking, about a game I really don't care about, in Hattrick :)

CM4 - QuikSand's return to Lincoln City even if I didn't know he left to begin with

The Vincent Memorial League by Honolulu Blue in which MLB blew apart. It's rumored that The Boss's checkbook caused it.....

Tiger Beware: A T.W. PGA Tour Dynasty by thealmighty where apparently he plays the part of Vijay Singh.

ZFL 5 by revrew which is by far the longest running dynasty in regards to a sports game and I dont think I've looked at one post longer then 2 minutes.

The 1970 Fredrick Tequilas - An Experiment in Chemistry by cuervo72 is about a fictional 1970 Tequila team. It's by far the prettiest dynasty I have seen.

Everyone panic! The Crawfish have lasers!!! by The Afoci in another dynasty about that evil soccer sim.

Here are the award winners!

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

In third place, with having one attempted Dynasty ever, myself, MrBug708. With special consideration to Neuqua for always starting out with a stacked team in EVERY ONLINE LEAGUE! **Editors note: MrBug708 actually got a Bronze Bust of Carrot Top, not a Bronze Scribe ;) **

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

On to the Silver Scribe, where we have QuikSand! for his lovely QuikSand Returns to Lincoln City.

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

Next we have The Afoci! with his Crawfish w/Laser's Dynasty. But of course, as you may have noticed, he didn't win, he only tied with QuikSand, allowing myself to give the Bronze Sculpture of Carrot Top to anyone I felt like. :D

And the Gold Scribe goes to

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http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Revrew's ZFL wins the Dynasty of the Year!

Congrats to all :)

[sabotai]

I'll step in for playa and do the TCY dynasty award.

[Kodos]

Wow! :D I can't believe it! I was just hoping for a bronze. This is so awesome. I'm honored to be mentioned alongside Kodos, one of the best dynasty writers here at FOFC.

Thanks for all those who voted for me. I'm off to the bar for a celebratory drink. After I throw a few back, I'll do the Rookie of the Year presentation. . .

Congratulations, Grid Iron. I tend to believe that your dynasty deserved to win the FOF category outright (my dynasty hardly progressed at all last year), but thanks to a Chicago-style ballot-box stuffing, I was able to come up with a tie at the last moment. God bless those hanging chads and my connections to Jeb Bush! ;) In any case, I'm proud to share the gold with such a creative, well-written dynasty as yours.

P.S. - Anyone interested in a taking a crack at the TCY dynasty presentation? Damn these live shows! It's so much easier to get things edited to flow smoothly when you complete them totally in advance... ;)

P.P.S. - Anxiety: I shudder to think where those Rigelian dildos might be going... :eek:

[Kodos]

I'll step in for playa and do the TCY dynasty award.

I'm not into the whole gay interspecies sex thing, but I could kiss you right now! :D I will PM you the results in a moment!

[JeeberD]

ZFL rules!!!!!!!!!!!

Congrats revrew! You deserve this after all the work you've put into the league... :)

[Abe Sargent]

P.P.S. - Anxiety: I shudder to think where those Rigelian dildos might be going... :eek:

Or to whom.....

The Afoci, where have you been????


-Anxiety

[JAG]

ditto what JeeberD said. Congrats rev, you deserve it.

[sterlingice]

Visual presentation will be posted in the morning. I've got it about half done but I'm falling asleep at the keyboarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[GoldenEagle]

Visual presentation will be posted in the morning. I've got it about half done but I'm falling asleep at the keyboarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

Wimp.

[revrew]

Wow. Thanks, all. The ZFL would like to thank the voters, fans, participants...and the lovely award presenter girls.

[Kodos]

Oh no, revrew! You're no longer the President of the Chuck Ulysses Farley fanclub, according to your sig! ;)

[The Afoci]

Or to whom.....

The Afoci, where have you been????


-Anxiety

Sorry. I got nothing. :)

[sterlingice]

Visual Representation

At first glance, this may seem like one of those boring awards like editing or something. But really, if you've win this, you're one of the best dynasties out there. These nominee dynasties are true multimedia efforts with both good writing and a good look, the total package. This is a new award for this year so whoever wins will be the first ever recipient of it.

As an aside, preparing for this allowed me to read a couple of dynasties I had never noticed before. I apologize in advance to any of these authors if I make any mistakes when describing their dynasties. The only one I had read before voting was X-Com so I can't tell for sure if some of the graphics have been lost to the place where internet graphics go to die. What can I say, I'm a hattrick guy and those are the dynasties I know best.

And now the nominees. Click on the thumbnail for a larger view.

<table width="100%" border="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td width="6%">http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/TequilasMini.jpg (http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/Tequilas.jpg)</td> <td width="94%"> cuervo72
The 1970 Frederick Tequilas - An Experiment in Chemistry [Link (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/%7Efof/forums/showthread.php?t=14353)]


One of 7(!) nominations for this dynasty or author. Unless I'm mistaken (which happens a lot), when I was voting, there were a ton of graphics that went along with the dynasty. However, these just weren't loading as I was taking screenshots. So instead, here is some plain text from the Tequilas. Sorry for the technical difficulties.

</td></tr></tbody> </table>

<table width="100%" border="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td> klayman
Hearts of Iron: The Soviets [Link (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/%7Efof/forums/showthread.php?t=13961)]


As far as I can tell, text based only, but with great formatting. A long term dynasty which is quite impressive considering most of the war dynasties I've seen get very popular but die quickly. This one, however, has been going on nearly 6 months and is still going strong!

</td> <td>http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/SovietsMini.jpg (http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/Soviets.jpg)</td></tr></tbody> </table>

<table width="100%" border="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td>http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/AmTeamMini.jpg (http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/AmTeam.jpg)</td> <td> jshipman2
FOF2004: The Return of America's Team II [Link (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/%7Efof/forums/showthread.php?s=&threadid=16942)]

Whether you love them or hate them, the Dallas Cowboys are one of the favorite dynasty teams at FOFC. jshipman2's incarnation went 3 seasons and was augmented with some of the best graphics and text formatting seen in a sim, football or otherwise.

</td></tr></tbody> </table>

<table width="100%" border="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td> Godzilla Blitz
X-COM II: The Earth's Revenge [Link (http://dynamic2.gamespy.com/%7Efof/forums/showthread.php?t=21971)]

While it didn't garner the 7 nominations cuervo did, everyone knows of this powerhouse. Does GB get to throw another Golden Scribe into his wheelbarrow full of them? Not only does this dynasty behemoth have good writing, but GB's added quite a bit of art in the past few incarnations as well.

</td> <td>http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/XComMini.jpg (http://www.sunflower.com/%7Esterlingice/XCom.jpg)</td></tr></tbody> </table>

And the Winners Are...



<table width="100%" border="0"> <tbody> <tr> <td> http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png











</td> <td> BRONZE
Hearts of Iron: The Soviets, klayman

Clearly, klayman did just enough ballot box stuffing in his job as "independent" auditor. :) Hearts of Iron wins the Bronze Scribe.

</td></tr> <tr> <td> http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png











</td> <td> SILVER
X-COM II: The Earth's Revenge, Godzilla Blitz

In what some might consider a mild upset considering GB's sway with the voters, X-Com takes the Silver Scribe. And the winner is...

</td></tr> <tr> <td> http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png











</td> <td> GOLDEN SCRIBE
The 1970 Frederick Tequilas - An Experiment in Chemistry, cuervo72

Frederick Tequilas! cuervo gets his first Golden Scribe in a big way! In his previous nominations, everyone noted how great it looked and it pays off big here.

</td></tr></tbody> </table> Closing

With the new WYSIWYG interface, this category is going to be even more competitive next year as it's getting easier and easier to make your dynasty look good. But all of these guys did it the old fashioned way in the good old days. Congratulations to all the nominees and on with the show.

[Godzilla Blitz]

Congrats, Cuervo!

Cuervo's presentation is a dimension better than all the rest. I'm glad he won. He deserves it.

Thanks for the silver, though!

[sabotai]

klay's HOI did have maps for awhile but I guewss they had to be taken off.

[klayman]

klay's HOI did have maps for awhile but I guewss they had to be taken off.
Yeah, I had maps and pictures of new units back when we could add attachments. Sadly eveything is gone now :(

Thanks for the Bronze Scribe from everbody who voted and everybody who were actively reading along.

PS: Great presentation, btw SI!

[revrew]

Oh no, revrew! You're no longer the President of the Chuck Ulysses Farley fanclub, according to your sig! ;)

Like the "master of subtlety" said, get that Gatesville dynasty back up and running (hint, hint). :D

[sterlingice]

Yeah, I had maps and pictures of new units back when we could add attachments. Sadly eveything is gone now :(

Thanks for the Bronze Scribe from everbody who voted and everybody who were actively reading along.

PS: Great presentation, btw SI! Sorry about that. As I said, I hadn't read through any of the dynasties when they were up except X-Com so I wasn't sure if something was gone or not.

SI

[Kodos]

Like the "master of subtlety" said, get that Gatesville dynasty back up and running (hint, hint). :D


Uh-oh. Fresh off of his Golden Scribe victories, rev is playing hardball! :eek:

[sterlingice]

Uh-oh. Fresh off of his Golden Scribe victories, rev is playing hardball! :eek:
Ooh! I'll pile on, too!


Get back to work!

SI

[Kodos]

But do you have any Golden Scribes to back that big talk up, fella? ;)

[sterlingice]

But do you have any Golden Scribes to back that big talk up, fella? ;)
Isaac: I won the Pulitzer Prize, Jeremy.
Jeremy: It's quite an honor, sir.
Isaac: No, I mean it's one of the many objects in the room I can grab and shove up-
Jeremy: Got it!

SI

[Kodos]

Kodos takes the stage after a brief lull.

"There are still plenty of presentations left folks, so have some more wings and some more immodium, and enjoy the rest of the show! And don't forget to hit on...err, tip your waitresses! Here's what we still have on tap:

TCY presented by sabotai
Professional Football presented by Denny Green
Soccer presented by Blade6119
Interactive presented by SplitPersonality1
Dynasty Poster of the Year presented by Chief Rum
Dynasty Hall of Fame presented by GoldenScribeGuy
Lifetime Achievement presented by Mystery Presenter

[tucker342]

Congrats to revrew! You earned it!:D

[Kodos]

Kodos walks up to the stage once more, and nervously fumbles around with the mike.

"So, anyone heard any good jokes recently?..."

[sabotai]

I keep forgetting to do the TCY presentation (Me and my stupid volunteering...). I'll try to do it tonight.

[Kodos]

No pressure, sabotai! Especially since you're pulling double duty here. Just a friendly reminder for the remaining presenters.

POST THEM SOON OR DIE!!!! :eek:









;)

[Godzilla Blitz]

I feel sorry for the Soccer dynasties.

Odds are they're going to have a looooong wait. ;)

[Kodos]

Did Blade6119 die again?!?

[Godzilla Blitz]

Did Blade6119 die again?!?

Not yet.

I was just recalling his performance in the ill-fated Phoenix dynasty. Didn't it take him about four months to do the draft for his season, and then another two years to post the results? By then two newer versions of FOF had been released.

[Kodos]

Yep. He pretty much followed right in my footsteps, unfortunately... ;)

[GoldenEagle]

(The crowd is quiet and has the latest entertainment being puzzle solving. Everyone has given up in the puzzle and it looks as everyone is sleeping. Suddenly, a radio somewhere in the back starts blaring some college fight song. GoldenEagle appears from the kitchen dressed like rock star. There is smoke and lights flashing everywhere.)

GoldenEagle: THIS AINT DONE YET!!!!!!!!!

(GoldenEagle then goes to the bathroom leaving the audience to wonder if he is referring to the Award Show or to his bathroom rush.)

[sterlingice]

Yeah, um, is there any rest of the show?

SI

[Kodos]

Silence, you! And enjoy a refreshing O'Douls served up by the friendly women of Hooters. Remember party hard, but party responsibly!




There should be more presentations shortly. You know, when Jurassic Park opened, they experienced a few minor issues as well, but in the end, most would agree that things worked out for the best. And so it will be here. :)

[Godzilla Blitz]

Kodos walks up to the stage once more, and nervously fumbles around with the mike.

"So, anyone heard any good jokes recently?..."

Oh! Oh! Oh! I got one!

Um, this Sectoid, you know, walks into a bar and says, "Ucccchit kaaaaki!*"















*Sectoid for "Ouch"

[Kodos]

Good one! I can see why you get all those beautiful Golden Scribe Trophies! :D

[sterlingice]

Oh! Oh! Oh! I got one!

Um, this Sectoid, you know, walks into a bar and says, "Ucccchit kaaaaki!*"
Two Sectoids walked into a bar, the third one ducked?

SI

[Godzilla Blitz]

Two Sectoids walked into a bar, the third one ducked?

SI

Har! We're rolling now!

Um...

Hummm...

Oh, ok! Here's one!

This Sectoid walks into a bar and...
















...Real Deal says, "Incompetent Bastard! Slap a Yellow Pin of Cowardice on him!"

:)

Ok, I'm off for more beer. Hey, how about this round's on me! Shouldn't be too expensive buying beer for all the four people here.

[sterlingice]

I think it's time to prepare the rotten fruit shield.

SI

[JeeberD]

Has Crappy developed that one yet?

[Denny Green]

Hello everyone and thanks for being here today. I’d like to say that first, I’m thankful for Mr. Bidwell giving me this opportunity to take this job, and second, I think we’ll be in the playoffs this season, and the Super Bowl won’t be too far away…..hmm…..wait a minute, this is the wrong notepad.

Here we go. #1. Ask Kodos about appearance fee.

Okay, Mr. Kodos, when do I get my appearance fee for this? Can we talk later about it?

Lets see….#2. Present nominees…..okay lets see….this is for that web site thingy I read here and there, this is the Golden Scribes right? On FOFC? Okay, who do we have for this. Oh yeah


Okay I’m presenting the award for Best Professional Football dynasty. Here are the nominees:

Kodos’s The Bill Gates Challenge
Okay first off, I’m not sure of the ethics on this one…The organizer of these awards up for an award himself? Whatever I guess. I’ve been reading this one since my lurker days when I was still with the Vikings. Oh those Vikings. How is Mike Tice doing these days anyway? Okay where was I? Gatesville, right. This is a long running dynasty where Mr. Kodos here is trying to force the Cowboys to move from Dallas by having a successful team just to their south in Gatesville. So far, he’s been a flop at doing this and Mr. Gates is going to fire him if he doesn’t either get the Boys to move this season or doesn’t win the Super Bowl himself. Personally, I don’t see why anyone should be fired if they lead their team to the playoffs year in and year out.

cuervo72’s The 1970 Frederick Tequilas
I could use some Tequila right about now, thinking about my Viking days. Anyway, this dynasty is retro, bringing us back to the 70s. cuervo72 is all about presentation, and his helmets provide excellent color for this interesting if somewhat story dry dynasty. The presentation kept me coming back though, and it might be what puts it over the top for the voters.

Quiksand and company’s Groupthink 3 – Sizing up the Kitty Hawk Flyers
Another groupthink. Starting with a collection of house rules, this bunch tries to take the Kitty Hawk Flyers to the promised land (Mr. Bidwell, I did NOT PROMISE a Super Bowl) and keep them there. However, I think they were too successful too early, and interest waned. They did keep it going for 4 seasons though, so not a bad attempt. Groupthink has to rely on input from numerous sources, so they tend to die early. I really think their early success did them in, but its still a good read with Quiksand leading some great discussion.

Anxiety’s Madden ’04 Empty Cupboard
Ahhh….this one falls close to my heart. I much the same way I plan to gut the pathetic bunch of Cardinals I currently have, Anxiety axes his sorry lot and starts over with an “empty cupboard.” He wraps a fairly intriguing intro around a pretty good storytelling for a great dynasty filled with interviews, mystery emails, and press releases. Along the way he renames the team the Copperheads (I gotta make a note of that and tell Bidwell) and moves them to Las Vegas (another note there).

Grid Iron’s Nebraska Blizzards
I really don’t know what the hell to say about this one. A crazy, international spy story wrapped around an expansion team in Nebraska. This thing takes so many twists you might think it’s a Randy Moss story about meter cops. I honestly haven’t made it all the way through this one, but I cheated and read the end of it. Its good, really it is. I’m just not sure this really belongs in this category though.

revrew's ZFL
This crazy little dynasty is born from a card game revrew created. Its football by 2 decks of 52. Teams have come and gone and expansion has occurred, and the game has lasted into its seventh season even with some starts and stops. I honestly haven’t kept up with this one a whole lot as I don’t participate, but its got a big following from what I understand, so it should do well.

Okay there are the nominees. One thing I need to put out there. Mr Bidwell, after going back over it, can I PLEASE do what Anxiety did? PLEAAAASSSE?

Okay, now for the winners.


The bronze scribe for Pro Football Dynasty goes to……




http://users3.ev1.net/~davidpr/bronzescribe.png
Grid Iron and his NEBRASKA BLIZZARDS dynasty!!!!!!



There is no silver scribe, so we have a tie for GOLD!!



And the Golden Scribe for Best Professional Football dynasty goes to…..









http://users3.ev1.net/~davidpr/goldenscribe-gold.png
Kodos for The BILL GATES CHALLENGE and revrew for ZFL!!!!!!!!!

I’ll toss this trophy out there and you guys can fight over it!





Anyone have Robert Smith’s phone number? Maybe Fran Tarkington?

[Kodos]

Kodos takes the stage. "Thanks, Denny! Yes, there may be some questionable ethics involved here in being eligible in my own awards show, but let's keep in mind what's really important: Aren't these Hooters girls hot?!"?

"Anyhow, seriously, I would like to thank everyone who voted for my dynasty, or ever took the time out of their miserable workday to catch the latest update on Chuck Farley's never-ending geriatric skirt-chasing. I would also like to congratulate my fellow trophy winners, and as well as recognize the great dynasties of all my fellow finalists! The fact that I received this award amidst such stiff competition makes it even more special for me. Thanks!"

Obviously drunk, Kodos accidentally trips as he exits the stage and falls headlong into one of the bustier waitresses. Some in the small crowd wonder to themselves if it was an accident at all...

[Grid Iron]

Wow! A Bronze Scribe to go with my Golden one! :)

Congrats to Kodos and revrew!

[tucker342]

What a good group of football dynasties this year! All of the nominees were fantastic!:D

[sabotai]

Michael Buffer look-a-like: Now ladies and genetlemen...here to present the wards for the Best TCY Dyanasty...welcome one again...SABOTAI!!!

(Sabotai staggers onto the stage. He's obviously drunk off his ass. As he approaches the podium, he stops and stares out into the crowd. It is noticed that he's not staring just into the crowd, but at a particular Hooter girl with a very nice clevage. Sabotai smiles a drunk smile and continues to the podium)

sabotai: ....What?!

*Inaudible voice from offstage*

sabotai: TC-who?

*Inaudible voice*

sabotai: TC-how? (sabotai breaks out into laughter) Little joke..HA! Get it...TCY...TC-Why..TC-Who...HAHA!

(sabotai looks over the cards and has a confused look on his face.)

sabotai: Didn't I do this one already?

*Inaudible voice*

sabotai: Speak louder damn it!

Voice: You did the Best College Football dynasty...this one is exclusive to TCY dynasties.

sabotai: But I did this...see, Eastern Michigan, Rutgers, Village Challenge...It's been done!!

*Inaudbile voice*

sabotai: What the hell did you say!?

Voice: I said just read the fucking cards!!

sabotai: Best calm down boy before I come over there and shove these here cards right up your ass!!

(sabotai straightens his tie...actually makes it worse)

sabotai: And now presenting the TCY (look offstage and then back to audience) Dyansty awards...the nominees are...Eastern Michigan, Rutgers, Village Challenge,One Down At a Time...hey, that's a new one. That dynasty was shown one down at a time (breaks out into hysterical laughter)....oh and the Top 10 Recruits dynasty...

sabotai: AHEM!! And the bronze goes to.

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

It's a tie....oooohhhh! Haha. Ahem...Top Ten Recruits by thealmighty and Eastern Michigan by Anxiety.

The silver....

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

Rutgers...The Birthplace of Sucking At College Football by cthomer5000. Hahah....oh man I own so much.

And the gold goes to

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

What a fucking surprise....The Indiana Villiage Challenge by many many people with no lives.

Now it's time to bag me one of them hottie waitresses! Yeah!

(Sabotai takes a few steps forward and falls off of the stage into a table and proceeds to pass out.)

[Grid Iron]

Great write-up, Sab!

Now go enjoy a Hooters girl. . . or two!

[tucker342]

Great write up:D

[Buzzbee]

I'm curious to see who gets the Golden Scribe for Best Golden Scribe Presenter. I mean, if we're going to have Golden Scribes to honor great writing and contribution to FOFC, then shouldn't we have a Golden Scribe for the Golden Scribes?

[Franklinnoble]

I'm curious to see who gets the Golden Scribe for Best Golden Scribe Presenter. I mean, if we're going to have Golden Scribes to honor great writing and contribution to FOFC, then shouldn't we have a Golden Scribe for the Golden Scribes?

Brilliant!

[Tasan]

We could do a poll when everything is done.

[Kodos]

I'm curious to see who gets the Golden Scribe for Best Golden Scribe Presenter. I mean, if we're going to have Golden Scribes to honor great writing and contribution to FOFC, then shouldn't we have a Golden Scribe for the Golden Scribes?

Is this like one of those parallel universe episodes of Star Trek? :confused: **shivers**

[Chief Rum]

I will be posting my award, Poster of the Year, Friday evening. You can all breathe now.

CR

[Buzzbee]

Is this like one of those parallel universe episodes of Star Trek? :confused: **shivers**


Yeah. There's the Trouble with Tribbles. This could be Kudos to Kodos. :p

[tucker342]

bump

[Kodos]

I will be posting my award, Poster of the Year, Friday evening. You can all breathe now.

CR

Can't... hold... breath... much.... longer.




Hey. How did I say that if I was holding my breath? :confused:

[sterlingice]

*yawn*

SI

[Kodos]

*yawn*

SI

Another satisfied customer? :redface:

[Breeze]

You guys still here. Man, I thought the Academy Awards took a long time. :D

[sterlingice]

You guys still here. Man, I thought the Academy Awards took a long time. :D
It said "all you can eat" and I'm not leaving until I've had all I can eat.

SI

[Kodos]

Alrighty, in the interest of preserving whatever slight interest there might still be in the Golden Scribes at this point, I am going to present the remaining categories to get them done with. Unfortunately, this will be short-changing the guys in the remaining categories because I don't really want to do full writeups for 5 different categories by myself. So just know that even if you aren't getting the deluxe treatment, you still had loyal readers vote for you and your hard work. Without further ado...

[Kodos]

Best Soccer Dynasty

In this category, we had two venerable dynasty posters competing for the Golden Scribe: Chief Rum for his "Poppies From The Terrace Dynasty", and QuikSand for his "Return to Lincoln City" dynasty. While both were wonderful examples of what you can do to make a boring sport like soccer interesting, only one could come home with the Golden Scribe.

And the winner is


http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

QuikSand, for Return to Lincoln City. Congratulations, QuikSand! Time to clear some more space on your mantle.

Having said that, how about a big round of applause for the worthy runner-up? Congratulations on your Silver Scribe, Chief Rum!

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png


Moving right along...

[Kodos]

Our next category is...

Best Interactive Dynasty

Five deserving candidates are up for 2004's Best Interactive Dynasty. Each of these writers has found a way to let the reader become a part of the dynasty, and for this they are to be commended. The finalists are:

Franklinnoble's popular Enter the Matrix dynasty...

gold101's long-standing FOFC Racing dynasty...

GroupThink 3, Sizing up the Kitty Hawk Flyers...

Godzilla Blitz's juggernaut, X-Com II...

And last, but not least, revrew's ZFL.

And the envelope, please...




Ladies and gentlemen...

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

The Bronze Scribe goes to gold101 for FOFC Racing! Congratulations, gold101, and keep up the good work!

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

The Silver Scribe goes to revrew for his ZFL dynasty. Nice work, revrew! :)

That leaves the Gold Scribe, which goes to...

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Godzilla Blitz for X-Com II!!! Congratulations, Blitz! We've arranged for a U-Haul for you in the back of the parking lot!
:D

[Kodos]

Our next category to present is

Poster of the Year

Ladies and gentlemen, our next category recognizes the writers who added the most to the dynasty board in 2003. Each of them is to be applauded for their hard work in creating dynasties that are among the very best that are out there.

The finalists are:

Anxiety...

cuervo72...

Godzilla Blitz...

QuikSand...

revrew...

and thealmighty.

Before I announce the winners, I would just like folks to know that the voting in this category was extremely close, with all of the finalists within just a few votes of eachother. This reflects on how many quality dynasty posters we have here at FOFC. Thank you gentlemen. Here are the results:

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/bronzescribe.png

The Bronze Scribe goes to revrew! You're doing pretty well for a rookie dynasty poster, eh? Congratulations on a well-deserved trophy! :)



http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/silverscribe.png

The Silver Scribe goes to QuikSand, whose continuing contribution to the dynasties board is appreciated.






That leaves the Golden Scribe, which goes to...

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Godzilla Blitz! Kodos slaps his forehead in mock surprise. Who would'a believed it? ;) Congratulations Blitz, and thank you to all of our finalists!

[Kodos]

http://www.sportplanet.com/fof/images/goldenscribe.png

Alright folks, we are getting down to the nitty-gritty here, with just 2 categories remaining. First I will present the Dynasty Hall of Fame award, and then we will get to the Lifetime Achievement award.

Ahem...

The Dynasty Hall of Fame was created to recognize the dynasties that have made the most enduring contribution to the board. Each year, the dynasty which receives the most votes will be removed from future votes in the Best Dynasty of All Time category, thereby allowing new dynasties to enjoy their own moment in the sun, instead of having old favorites win year after year, perhaps on their reputation alone.

It is my great pleasure to announce that in this, the first year of the Dynasty Hall of Fame, we will have two inductees going in together. Yes, as has often been the case in this year's awards, we have had a tie. Please join me in congratulating Godzilla Blitz on the induction of his legendary X-Com II dynasty into the Hall of Fame. Also, it is my great honor to announce that my own Bill Gates Challenge will be going into the Hall side-by-side with my personal favorite dynasty, the venerable X-Com II. Come on up here, Blitz! We did it!

Ohhh, and by the way, you might as well stay up here, GB...

Over the years, we, the readers of the dynasties board here at FOFC, have been privileged enough to enjoy the fruits of this poster's prolific and always entertaining dynasties. His tales of marauding aliens, of football coaches bent on the destruction of their own team from the inside, of baseball teams playing with the fate of the Earth hanging in the balance, as well as his more "down to earth" dynasties about football and basketball, have inspired countless others to come forth and post their own stories. Almost single-handledly, this poster gave birth to the popular interactive dynasty phenomenon that has revolutionized the dynasty forum. Instead of allowing his readers to be idle spectators, he encouraged others to join in and tell a part of the story themselves.

He helped show that a dynasty could be more than just the dry recounting of statistics from a text sim. He showed that with a little creativity and a lot of hard work, a compelling story could be created that would entice readers to check the board regularly in the hopes of finding that another installment of the story had been posted. While there is no way to really know for sure, I would hazard a guess that this poster's dynasties have inspired more lurkers to come out of the shadows and join in the fun than any other poster in the history of FOFC.

And so, without further delay, let me be the first to extend my congratulations to Godzilla Blitz, the winner of the 2004 Lifetime Achievement award. I cannot think of a more deserving winner than you, my friend. :)

[Nyarlahotep]

Gratz to all the winners.

[Chief Rum]

I suck. Sorry, Kodos. I shouldn't volunteer if I don't get around to doing it.

Congrats to all the winners.

CR

[Grid Iron]

Congrats, everyone!

[Kodos]

I suck. Sorry, Kodos. I shouldn't volunteer if I don't get around to doing it.

Congrats to all the winners.

CR

I wouldn't worry about it, Chief. Writing a presentation is the kind of thing that is easy to put off almost indefinitely, especially if you have other stuff that you are busy with. It's hard to take time to do a writeup when there are other things out there that are just higher priorities and you've only got a finite amount of time to do things.

I just figured that I would take care of things today for the sake of finishing the awards off, since the whole process of making the awards started way back in December (the nominations, etc.) and here we are in mid-March. With all the tweaking of the awards categories and requests for feedback and whatnot, it's just been a long process for me, and I frankly just wanted to be done with the whole thing for the year at this point. Now that the awards categories have been finalized, maybe it'd be more of a streamlined thing to run the show next year. Still, I'm hoping somebody else might want to take up the mantle on this thing next time around. I think maybe two years of running the show has been enough for me. If somebody out there wants to take it over, it's yours. Of course, I'd be happy to still lend a hand in some form. :)

By the way, I'd like to take a moment to thank everyone again who made this whole thing a success this year. Klayman helped me tally the votes and make some decisions as to how to handle things that came up along the way. And we had a bunch of guys write entertaining presentations. Lots of people took the time to vote, which I appreciate as well. Thanks to everyone, and thanks to the dynasty writers who inspired me to start the Golden Scribes in the first place. :) Keep up the good work!

Cheers,
- Kodos :cool:

[3ric]

Wow. GB completed a <i>Return of the Kings</i>-like sweep of the awards.

[Kodos]

Wow. GB completed a <i>Return of the Kings</i>-like sweep of the awards.

Well, almost. My accidental forgetting to put him in the finalist list for Dynasty of the Year pretty much screwed up his chances in that category. Still, it was the most dominating performance by a dynasty that the Golden Scribes have ever seen. :)

[SplitPersonality1]

Buzz buzz.......buzz buzz.........buzz buzz. (darn phone has been ringing all night - don't these people realize that I have the flu!)

SplitP1: Yello.

Kodos: Where the hell were you?

SplitP1: Huh.

Kodos: The Golden Scribes. You were supposed to be a presenter?

SplitP1: What are you talking about. That's tomorrow night.

Kodos: No. It was tonight you doofus.

SplitP1: What day is it? (looks at the calendar). Oh carp. The medicine I took must have knocked me out for a whole day. My God. I LOST HOURS!

Kodos: Sigh. You weren't the only one.

SplitP1:Uh......I'm really sorry about that Kodos.

Kodos: No problem. Get some sleep.


I echo what Chief Rum said. He sucks. No wait. I suck too.

In all seriousness, congrats to all the winners.

Kodos. I owe you one.

[Kodos]

No big whup.

Hey, I know.... Wanna take over the awards for me next year? ;)

[SplitPersonality1]

And SplitP carefully raises the Blaster Launcher and aims it directly at the Commander. :)

[Kodos]

:p It's was worth a try.