Axxon
03-19-2004, 08:59 AM
I live by these 39. Lets finish the list. Send in the other 61.....please.
100 Things to Remember.
I had a crazy uncle that was on his deathbed a long time ago,
he said boy, there's 100 things in life every man needs to know to survive...
and here's 39 of em,
A virgin don't never drive a Z28.
Never bet the ranch on your prostate.
If it's got an adams apple it's probably a man.
Never trust a gay gypsy with the palm of your hand.
She didn't accidently get good in bed.
You can't join the church if you're already dead.
A work uniform ain't totally nude.
Brim and bass ain't seafood.
When there's guns in the house one better be yours.
Don't be nekkid next to any fishing lures.
If there's girl scout cookies, she's a little too young.
If you say, "I do" be the ugly one.
Don't ever let a bald man borrow your comb.
Never play strip poker in a nursing home.
Don't blame your pall bearers cause they don't show,
if you're buried in the middle of the superbowl.
Let people borrow money, they'll leave you alone.
Never fry bacon without a shirt on.
Never spray water on a hornets nest.
A women rarely aces the drivers test.
The sign probly don't really mean massage.
Never threaten anybody in camoflage.
Say you love her till she lays down the butcher knife.
Never put the move on the bosses wife.
She's messing round on you if your briefs don't fit.
Never trust a hitchhiker to babysit.
Cosmos never in a happy home.
You can't cut a deal with a kidney stone.
A politician ain't got an HMO.
Washing her hair means she don't want to go.
Don't a ridicule a biker bout his tatoo,
You've been married nine times, hell maybe it's you.
Doom ain't the same as Donkey Kong.
If he's wearing high heels you might have raised him wrong.
The clinic ain't the best place to pick up dates.
Don't rent a room from a man named Bates.
A tank top's never on a billionaire.
Stevie Ray Vaughn missed a note here and there.
How many get to heaven, no one knows,
but hell will be asses and elbows.
And the he died. Crazy fool rolled over and died and never did tell me what them other 61 things were. So if anybody out there knows how about getting ahold of me at timwilson.net
100 Things to Remember.
I had a crazy uncle that was on his deathbed a long time ago,
he said boy, there's 100 things in life every man needs to know to survive...
and here's 39 of em,
A virgin don't never drive a Z28.
Never bet the ranch on your prostate.
If it's got an adams apple it's probably a man.
Never trust a gay gypsy with the palm of your hand.
She didn't accidently get good in bed.
You can't join the church if you're already dead.
A work uniform ain't totally nude.
Brim and bass ain't seafood.
When there's guns in the house one better be yours.
Don't be nekkid next to any fishing lures.
If there's girl scout cookies, she's a little too young.
If you say, "I do" be the ugly one.
Don't ever let a bald man borrow your comb.
Never play strip poker in a nursing home.
Don't blame your pall bearers cause they don't show,
if you're buried in the middle of the superbowl.
Let people borrow money, they'll leave you alone.
Never fry bacon without a shirt on.
Never spray water on a hornets nest.
A women rarely aces the drivers test.
The sign probly don't really mean massage.
Never threaten anybody in camoflage.
Say you love her till she lays down the butcher knife.
Never put the move on the bosses wife.
She's messing round on you if your briefs don't fit.
Never trust a hitchhiker to babysit.
Cosmos never in a happy home.
You can't cut a deal with a kidney stone.
A politician ain't got an HMO.
Washing her hair means she don't want to go.
Don't a ridicule a biker bout his tatoo,
You've been married nine times, hell maybe it's you.
Doom ain't the same as Donkey Kong.
If he's wearing high heels you might have raised him wrong.
The clinic ain't the best place to pick up dates.
Don't rent a room from a man named Bates.
A tank top's never on a billionaire.
Stevie Ray Vaughn missed a note here and there.
How many get to heaven, no one knows,
but hell will be asses and elbows.
And the he died. Crazy fool rolled over and died and never did tell me what them other 61 things were. So if anybody out there knows how about getting ahold of me at timwilson.net