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View Full Version : the most succinct way to describe the Yanks-Sox "rivalry"

SirFozzie
03-07-2005, 01:49 PM
From today's Jim Caple column, (an excerpt from his new book, "The Devil wears pinstripes")

Asked to explain the fundamental difference between Sox fans and Yankees fans, YankeeHater.com's Moorby replied it was a simple one. "It's 'How can we manage to blow this game?' versus 'How can we find a way to win it?'"

Moorby, of course, said that prior to the 2004 championship series, back when a typical conversation between a Red Sox fan and a Yankees fan still went something like this:

Red Sox Fan: The biggest problem with Yankees fans is you're spoiled rotten. You've won too many times to really enjoy a championship. The champagne of victory never tastes so sweet until you've choked on the vomit of defeat while hugging the toilet in the bathroom of the Cask and Flagon at three in the morning.

Yankees fan: Nineteen-Eighteen.

Red Sox fan: The Yankees spend so much money that anything less than a championship is a letdown. You'll never know the thrill that comes with overcoming impossible odds to snatch the ultimate prize. To appreciate winning, you first have to know the agony of being rushed to the hospital with a 104-degree fever after getting infected from a non-sterile needle while having "Steinbrenner sucks" tattooed on your rear end.

Yankees fan: Bucky Dent.

Red Sox fan: Actually, I feel sorry for you, I really do. People who've never known unrequited love can never truly appreciate love. You have to know what it's like to have brain cancer slowly eat into your brain cells after using a lead-based face paint for an entire 81-game home schedule, plus spring training and the postseason.

Yankees fan: Bill Buckner.

Red Sox fan: All right, that does it. I've had it with you. Shut your @#&%@ing piehole!

Yankees fan: Roger Clemens.

Red Sox fan: Jeter sucks!

Yankees fan: Grady Little.

Red Sox fan: A-Rod swallows!!!

Yankees fan: Aaron Boone.

Red Sox fan: @#$& you!!!

The conversation usually broke down from there.

Everything is different now thanks to Boston's 2004 comeback. Now, a conversation goes like this.

Yankees fan: All right, so you finally won one series against us when it actually meant something. Now get over yourselves.

Red Sox fan: Who's your Papi!!!

Yankees fan: Actually, I think it's kind of nice that you won, I really do. At least now we don't have to hear your pathetic whining about how much you suffered over all those years. Doris Kearns Goodwin and Stephen King should finally be happy.

Red Sox fan: David Ortiz!

Yankees fan: I mean, it's not like this changes anything. We've still won 26 championships since 1918 and you've still only won one and we're still going to kick your ass again next year. You do know that don't you?

Red Sox fan: Kevin Brown!

Yankees fan: All right, that does it. I've had it with you. Shut your @#&%@ing piehole!

Red Sox fan: A-Fraud!

Yankees fan: Schilling sucks!

Red Sox fan: Jeter swallows!

Yankees fan: @#$& you!

Red Sox fan: @#$& you!
rkmsuf
03-07-2005, 01:57 PM
Please make it stop.

I'm a Red Sox fan but enough already. Shark jump or whatever.
Honolulu_Blue
03-07-2005, 01:58 PM
Boring.

I reckon that's pretty "succinct."
Cringer
03-07-2005, 02:01 PM
I don't know what the word "succinct" means. Nor do I know if I am pronouncing it correctly, so maybe that is why I do not know what it is. :cool:
Cringer
03-07-2005, 02:03 PM
suc·cinct Audio pronunciation of "succinct" ( P ) Pronunciation Key (sk-sngkt)
adj. suc·cinct·er, suc·cinct·est

1. Characterized by clear, precise expression in few words; concise and terse: a succinct reply; a succinct style.
2. Archaic. Encircled as if by a girdle; girded.


I got it. :D
sterlingice
03-07-2005, 02:36 PM
So, the moral of the story is that Yankees fans used to be asshats and now both are?

SI
Ksyrup
03-07-2005, 02:37 PM
I read the first two paragraphs of that excerpt and was totally turned off. I hate the Yankees as much as the next guy, but this is clearly an attempt to pile on the Red Sox success and make a quick buck. Enough already. We all hate the Yankees. And their fans are from New York, so it goes without saying that they are annoying. Tell us something else we don't already know.
VPI97
03-07-2005, 02:38 PM
So, the moral of the story is that Yankees fans used to be asshats and now both are?
Sounds about right.
SirFozzie
03-07-2005, 02:44 PM
I read the first two paragraphs of that excerpt and was totally turned off. I hate the Yankees as much as the next guy, but this is clearly an attempt to pile on the Red Sox success and make a quick buck. Enough already. We all hate the Yankees. And their fans are from New York, so it goes without saying that they are annoying. Tell us something else we don't already know.

Give Caple credit.. he's been hating the yanks for a while now (years and years)..

and they excerpted a section about the Sox, because the Sox and Yankees are playing.

($80 bucks for SRO tickets? How rediculous is that for a freaking SPLIT SQUAD game????)
Desnudo
03-07-2005, 02:52 PM
I'll give him credit for that at least. I won't give him credit for being a particularly good, interesting, or original writer.
Ksyrup
03-07-2005, 02:52 PM
Give Caple credit.. he's been hating the yanks for a while now (years and years)..
Who hasn't?!? I mean, I guess I didn't actively hate them during most of the 80's and early 90's when they were what the Dallas Cowboys have been for the past several years, but gee, he's taking a real risk with his Yankee-hating stand these days. :rolleyes: Reminds me of the press release I read last week from Florida's Attorney General, who announced he is supporting new anti-murder legislation. Way to go out on a limb!
Radii
03-07-2005, 03:08 PM
So, the moral of the story is that Yankees fans used to be asshats and now both are?



Seems that way.
McSweeny
03-07-2005, 03:28 PM
well i can't speak for other Red Sox fan, but i do indeed hate the Yankees. A serious kind of hate that can only be built up over a lifetime. However, i find that back and forth dialog to be pretty bogus. All i've been doing since we won is smile a hell of a lot more. I was down in long island and all of us wearing Red Sox hats gravitated towards each other and just smiled at all the guys in Yankee hats.

If a Yankee fan does get out of control i just mention "Biggest choke in post-season history" and they shut up pretty quickly
Ksyrup
03-07-2005, 04:07 PM
That's not very succinct.
Maple Leafs
03-07-2005, 04:09 PM
How about: The team with the gratingly insincere superiority complex that has all the money and buys all the good players vs. the team with the gratingly insincere inferiority complex that has all the money and buys all the other good players?
sterlingice
03-07-2005, 04:18 PM
How about: The team with the gratingly insincere superiority complex that has all the money and buys all the good players vs. the team the gratingly insincere inferiority complex that has all the money and buys all the other good players?
For about the 10th time, we need hockey back so you post more :D

SI