Not a fun day at the home office

[Solecismic]

So, I'm sitting around at my computer this morning, which is unusual in itself because I tend to go to sleep around 5-6 am. But I'm awake because I'm waiting for the electrician to show up.

Why? Because a couple of days ago, a light fixture just fell from the ceiling of our kitchen. One that was installed only four years ago (I took a look and I just don't have the right parts to fix it myself).

Anyhow, at around 10:30, I hear a huge crash. Splintering wood, almost like a bomb went off. My office is over the garage, so I rush to the window, and see a minivan squealing tires at the bottom of our driveway, about 100 feet away.

Probably because of the tires squealing, my first thought was to get the license number. I then went outside, and saw a significant amount of damage to the post between our garage doors. One garage door was pushed in several inches, and now won't open. It looked like the minivan had backed into our garage at a good rate of speed.

At this point, I figured it would be a good idea to call the police. I reported the incident, gave them the license number. Right after I got off the phone, which was maybe 20 minutes after the crash, I saw the minivan come tearing down our street at about 50 mph (we live on a dead end, so this is not normal behavior). Then a minute later, it came right back out again.

I'm pretty freaked out now. Wondering who I pissed off, because in real life I'm fairly non-confrontational. Joe Stallings is apparently in Florida, so that's unlikely. Noop's been getting on my case recently, but he's in Florida, too. I have no idea what's going on there, but I have made a mental note never to visit the Sunshine state.

Anyhow, the police show up ten minutes later, take some pictures, ask me if there are any ex-wives or girlfriends angry with me. While we're talking, the dispatcher radios with the name of the person who owns the car. Not a name I know. The officer leaves to visit the home of the minivan owner.

Now we live in a fairly rural area in a town that has a crime rate that's about 2% of the national average. Nothing ever happens here. The only notes on the local police blotter are people passing bad checks at the Wal-Mart.

A couple of hours later, the police call back. It turns out some 16-year-old girl who just got her license two months ago got lost, and decided our driveway was a good place to turn around. For whatever reason, she went all the way up our driveway and turned around right by the garage. Then panicked when she hit the garage.

The policeman asks me if I'm willing to let her and her father come over and apologize. I figure there's no harm in it - I'm just so relieved that it wasn't intentional. So they show up, explain what happened. The girl's lying through her teeth, claims she didn't know she hit the garage hard enough to do any damage. When I asked why she was squealing tires coming out of the driveway, then, her father gave her a look like there was going to be hell to pay. She very coolly said she didn't notice. This girl's got him wrapped around her finger.

So, there's a splintered beam, and the garage door is partially off its track. It's probably a full day's work for a contractor. And there's no way I can get one out here soon, since it's probably the busiest time of the year - a lot of housing starts right now.

Yeah. yeah, I know. Front Office Driver's Education. Or Front Office Garage Repair. These things come in threes, I'm not looking forward to the rest of the day.

[Crapshoot]

For what its worth, did the Father/Daughter agree to pay for it ? will their car insurance cover it ?

[DeToxRox]

16 year old driver ...

... pix?

[wade moore]

Front Office Demolition Derby.

[Blackadar]

For what its worth, did the Father/Daughter agree to pay for it ? will their car insurance cover it ?

They better be, or she'd pay for it with "services rendered". :)


And did anyone else pick up that Jim goes to sleep between 5-6 am? That's the time I'm waking up!

[Solecismic]

Protocol is for my home insurance company to make an estimate, then I get the work done, pay for it, submit the bill, then my insurance company bills their car insurance company and I get reimbursed. No deductable in this case, so I won't be out any money in the end, just a major hassle having to do without my car for awhile, and, of course, losing a day of work when this construction is going on right under my office.

16 is kinda young for pictures. Maybe in a few years. I would have figured her for 13, though.

Hard to imagine what will happen to her car insurance rates, when she needs insurance again. Since she fled the scene of an accident, she's going to lose her license for a long time. And there's probably a fine as well. I heard she put on a good crying show at the police station, so she might get off easy.

[albionmoonlight]

Home Ownership is superior to renting in pretty much every major respect except for one. When you own it, you have to worry about fixing it. If you were renting, you could just report it to the landlord and let him deal with the contractors, insurance, etc. I hope that this father/daughter team is solvent and willing to pay. I'm also glad that your family was OK.

[sterlingice]

Yeah. yeah, I know. Front Office Driver's Education. Or Front Office Garage Repair. These things come in threes, I'm not looking forward to the rest of the day.
Nooooo! You stole our cheesy jokes for the day. Front Office Bad Joke Ruiner ;)

SI

[SirFozzie]

No, you see he mentions contractors, and what time of year folks are busy. it obviously must be Front Office Building Repairmen.

I hear cohesion's back, nothing like hiring a new traffic diverter and watching him blunder.

[Bee]

Am I the only one who read that and was trying to figure out how this girl backing into Jim's garage caused the light fixture in the kitchen to fall?

[Draft Dodger]

since I drive a minivan and live in NH, I thought I was going to get blamed for this...

[DeToxRox]

since I drive a minivan and live in NH, I thought I was going to get blamed for this...

So ... uh... Do you look like a 16 year old girl?

[ice4277]

So ... uh... Do you look like a 16 year old girl?
Since when do you need them to look like girls?

[DeToxRox]

Since when do you need them to look like girls?

Sorry if I like a certificate of authenticity.

[WSUCougar]

I think it's obvious, Jim. You didn't set enough relaxation time for this girl's boyfriend. So now she's pissed and gunning for you. You'll get an email from the player very soon, asking for more time to appease the woman scorned.

[Maple Leafs]

Any idea why she was tearing up and down the street half an hour later?

In terms of leaving the scene, she doesn't exactly sound like a criminal mastermind.

[Logan]

Am I the only one who read that and was trying to figure out how this girl backing into Jim's garage caused the light fixture in the kitchen to fall?

(raises hand)

[Coffee Warlord]

My disguise succeded. Muah!

[Buzzbee]

My disguise succeded. Muah!
So were you able to stand on the roof of the minivan and peek in Jim's window to see what his new game is?

[Coffee Warlord]

So were you able to stand on the roof of the minivan and peek in Jim's window to see what his new game is?

I'm waiting on the wire transfer to my account in Zurich before I release said information.

[MIJB#19]

I think it's obvious, Jim. You didn't set enough relaxation time for this girl's boyfriend. So now she's pissed and gunning for you. You'll get an email from the player very soon, asking for more time to appease the woman scorned.Or it was Jason Winkle's daughter and Winkle happily coming over to play innocent and watch the scene. Nice way to pay back for getting traded to San Luis Obispo.

[Celeval]

Joe Stallings is apparently in Florida, so that's unlikely. Noop's been getting on my case recently, but he's in Florida, too. I have no idea what's going on there, but I have made a mental note never to visit the Sunshine state.
Gold.

Seriously, sorry to hear it Jim - and glad it's not worse off, that nothing in the garage (like cars) were damaged as well.

[Solecismic]

Any idea why she was tearing up and down the street half an hour later?

In terms of leaving the scene, she doesn't exactly sound like a criminal mastermind.

I don't know. The answer I got was that she was lost and late for some event at the local high school, which happens to be on the same street as mine, but (and you'll find this only in New England) several turns and several miles from here, not well signed. She lives in the next town over.

I guess when she turned around in my driveway (and garage), she didn't realize it was a dead end.

The speed she was traveling on the second trip was frightening. This dead end has poor visibility in places, and people are always out walking.

She would have gotten away with it if I didn't happen to run to the window right away, and for whatever reason, the tires squealing made me think to get the license plate. I had maybe a one or two-second look at the car. No question whatsoever she wasn't going to tell anyone.

I've spent all afternoon trying to find a contractor. Can't even get anyone to call me back.

[weinstein7]

If she doesn't pay, then you can always retaliate through Front Office Posse!

[Buzzbee]

Nah, he's working on the text sim version of Grand Theft Auto: Amherst

[Farrah Whitworth-Rahn]

I don't know. The answer I got was that she was lost and late for some event at the local high school Like class? Isn't school still in session?

Sorry this happened Jim. Structural posts and things are not easy DIY projects if you can't get a contractor. If you do end up in DIY land, I'd offer to send Arlie out there to help. But well, he still hasn't painted the bathroom for me yet. ;)

[MTD]

W/ Insurance involved there is absolutely no reason for DIY as an insurance company is not going to allow him to profit from the repairs (i.e. his labor would be free).

Wait on the contractor until the insurance adjuster does her/his initial inspection. Once you have that estimate, ask the adjuster for a contractor's name. Make sure you note the adjusters name and when the contractor was refferred. The insurance company, despite not having any business ties with the contractor will respond to any complaints about the repairs when you say, "Bob the adjuster referred me to ABC Contractor."

If necessary make temporary repairs for security purposes and bill the insurance for those temporary repairs (keep all invoices and receipts).

[Ben E Lou]

And did anyone else pick up that Jim goes to sleep between 5-6 am? Based on the habits that I've picked up on him, I would have guessed between 4 and 5, so that was no surprise at all here.

Parents can be very, very naive sometimes, so no surprise if daddy ends up buying her answer.

[VPI97]

Based on the habits that I've picked up on him, I would have guessed between 4 and 5, so that was no surprise at all here. Same here. Jim is on the same schedule as me (aside from the sleeping in part).

[Desnudo]

I don't know. The answer I got was that she was lost and late for some event at the local high school, which happens to be on the same street as mine, but (and you'll find this only in New England) several turns and several miles from here, not well signed. She lives in the next town over.

I guess when she turned around in my driveway (and garage), she didn't realize it was a dead end.

The speed she was traveling on the second trip was frightening. This dead end has poor visibility in places, and people are always out walking.

She would have gotten away with it if I didn't happen to run to the window right away, and for whatever reason, the tires squealing made me think to get the license plate. I had maybe a one or two-second look at the car. No question whatsoever she wasn't going to tell anyone.

I've spent all afternoon trying to find a contractor. Can't even get anyone to call me back.

Are you saying that she couldn't get thea from hea?

[cthomer5000]

If the driver mentor had been in the car, no way this happens.

[TargetPractice6]

If the driver mentor had been in the car, no way this happens.Shouldn't she have already been mentored if she had a license?

[albionmoonlight]

No question whatsoever she wasn't going to tell anyone.
This pisses me off. I bumped into a parked car when I was a young driver and, though I REALLY REALLY just wanted to drive away, my parents taught me enough about being a decent person that I ended up owning up to it. Go figure, my world did not end.

That someone can literally smash into someone else's house and just try to drive away like nothing happened is amazing. I hope that little miss daredevil gets everything that she deserves out of life. Nothing more; nothing less.

[robbgmaier]

it's lucky it wasn't here in morgantown, I know a lot of people with shotguns that would have shot to kill after the first visit, let alone the return trip.

[Dutch]

What a bizarre story.

My Garage Door died a month ago (not from wreckless 16 year old girls unfortunately) and instead of paying Lowe's the $70 install fee they were offering I figured I could do the work myself. So there I was, balancing on a ladder, the garage door motor sitting on my head and I'm trying to screw the damn bolts into place. It took me almost 2 hours to get it secured. That sucked. And then the spring broke about a week later and I paid some guy $65 bucks to buy and replace that.

[judicial clerk]

What does this have to do with American Idol?



Have you contacted your insurance? I once had to bring in a contractor on a claim through my homeowners insurance. (there was some ...unpleasentness, I'm no longer allowed to use the bathroom while I am frying something on the stove). Anyway, the insurer gave me the option of using soemone off of their list of contractors. The upside was that if you use a guy from their list, the insurance co. does not question any of the work the contractor says needs to be done. And they did a ton of work that i never would have asked for.

[Solecismic]

Coming up with some original ones here - I like the idea of a driving mentor.

Yes, my insurance company is sending out a representative tomorrow with a list of potential contacts. He's been pretty good about this, but he's not optimistic that I can get this fixed soon.

This is well beyond DIY. There might be structural damage to the garage.

I did get the impression that this is a very spoiled girl. She wasn't upset that she had damaged someone's home. She was upset that she got caught. I just hope the police didn't buy the crying routine.

[DeToxRox]

Check all FOFC'ers for daughters who fit that description. I think maybe someone was using it as a diversion for info on the new game.

[SFL Cat]

Joe Stallings is apparently in Florida, so that's unlikely. Noop's been getting on my case recently, but he's in Florida, too. I have no idea what's going on there, but I have made a mental note never to visit the Sunshine state.

Awwww....some of us down here luv ya, big guy! :cool:

[sterlingice]

This pisses me off. I bumped into a parked car when I was a young driver and, though I REALLY REALLY just wanted to drive away, my parents taught me enough about being a decent person that I ended up owning up to it. Go figure, my world did not end.

That someone can literally smash into someone else's house and just try to drive away like nothing happened is amazing. I hope that little miss daredevil gets everything that she deserves out of life. Nothing more; nothing less.
Can't she get arrested for a hit and run or whatever the equivalent is for doing property damage instead of a car? Sounds like the little snot deserves it.

SI

[duckman]

I say hang her in the electric chair!

[BigJohn&TheLions]

I smell a new league suspension...

[Ben E Lou]

I did get the impression that this is a very spoiled girl. She wasn't upset that she had damaged someone's home. She was upset that she got caught.From my experience, that latter portion of that is probably a very astute observation. However, the "upset that she got caught" part is becoming applicable to more and more kids her age every day--not just the truly spoiled ones. This level of entitlement this generation of kids feels is frightening sometimes. A large group of kids I know got caught with alcohol at a school dance. Their response was to be *furious* at the principal because "he ruined our Senior Homecoming." The thought never entered their brains that *THEY* made the decision that reuined their Senior Homecoming.

[Fritz]

next time perhaps you will think twice about moving to dead end street in subsuburban vermont, you icecream loving hippie.

[Solecismic]

I don't think she was arrested. She had to come to the police station and make a report. I think it's at the officer's discretion whether she's ticketed for leaving the scene of an accident with damage. The crying performance may have gotten her out of it - I think she laid it on pretty thick based on what the officer said when he called me. And I think he bought it.

I like subsuburban New Hampshire. It's nice and quiet here. I'm almost surprised this didn't make the evening news. Here, when women want to take some time to think before they get married, they run off to the Wal-Mart and browse the sporting goods aisles. But we have been looking for land to build a new home for almost a year now. It is very hard to find right now.

[WSUCougar]

Just don't go too deep into the woods. You know, those woods.

[albionmoonlight]

I like subsuburban New Hampshire. It's nice and quiet here. I'm almost surprised this didn't make the evening news. Here, when women want to take some time to think before they get married, they run off to the Wal-Mart and browse the sporting goods aisles. But we have been looking for land to build a new home for almost a year now. It is very hard to find right now.
On the one hand, it sounds like you live in a somewhat sparsely populated area. On the other hand, you say that you are having trouble finding land. Is it that people tend to own large tracks that they don't want to sell, or am I wrong to assume that you live in a semi rural area?

[Solecismic]

On the one hand, it sounds like you live in a somewhat sparsely populated area. On the other hand, you say that you are having trouble finding land. Is it that people tend to own large tracks that they don't want to sell, or am I wrong to assume that you live in a semi rural area?

We have 2.5 acres.

A builder I'd like to use told me a joke the other day: What's the difference between a developer and a conservationist? The conservationist already had his house built.

Over the last few years, planning commissions have been espousing what they call these "open space" subdivisions, which essentially means an urban cluster surrounded by open land. It has a completely different feel from older semi-rural communities.

Developers like this type of development, because they spend less on roads (it's a huge expense to put in a properly graded and paved road). But they tend not to sell so well because of the clustering. No privacy.

We took a long look at a 27-acre lot a couple of towns away. It was almost like a campground. But we had to pass because our builder said it would cost about $80,000 to put in driveway. And it's probably too rural for us.

Everyone I've talked to out here says it's the worst year they've ever seen for buildable land. The people who own the large lots are apparently asking for so much of the profit that builders can't justify the expense of preparing the land (surveys, test pits, traffic analysis, roads).

[JeeberD]

27 acre lot?

Looks like Jim is looking for a home for the Solecismic Compound. Hope the ATF doesn't come knocking on his door...

[Farrah Whitworth-Rahn]

On the brighter side Jim, if you decide to tear down the house you're in now and build on that site, you could probably call this girl to come help with the demolition.

[gstelmack]

One thing to keep in mind here: insurance companies are looking for excuses to drop homeowners, and it only takes a claim or two to make it happen in some cases. Make sure you're covered from rate increases thanks to an incident that your insurance company won't end up having to pay for.

And cthomer, nice one.

[Solecismic]

On the brighter side Jim, if you decide to tear down the house you're in now and build on that site, you could probably call this girl to come help with the demolition.

Nice idea. She's a natural, I can tell.

Since there's a brook of some sort running through the neighborhood, there are areas of the lots that are designated wetlands. Back when this house was built, in 1975, people didn't worry about that sort of thing. But today, there's no way a house could be built on this site.

I'm being careful about the insurance. I have the assurance of the adjuster that this won't count as a claim on my part as long as I get them a copy of the police report. I will definitely follow up on that to make sure.

[MizzouRah]

She poked around while she was at your house and saw on the computer screen the words, "TCY 2: Alpha Build 0.563".

Hmmm...


Todd

[Bonegavel]

Still want to know the connection between the two disjointed parts of the original story: light in the kitchen and garage whacking.

[Buzzbee]

Still want to know the connection between the two disjointed parts of the original story: light in the kitchen and garage whacking.
The light in the kitchen explains why he was awake at that particular time. Normally he'd be asleep, but because he was waiting for the electrician, he was awake. If it hadn't been for that light, he wouldn't have seen the van, wouldn't have gotten the license plate number, and would be filing a claim on his own insurance rather than hers.

He oughta put that light in a helmet display case.

[Solecismic]

So, early this afternoon, some crazy woman destroyed her brand new blue minivan by plowing into (and breaking) a utility pole in front of our house. Her van was totalled, but she's just fine.

Meanwhile, there's been a utility crew out in front of our house all afternoon. They've brought in a brand new pole. At some point, we're going to lose power for a few hours.

I live on a damned dead end street. Where are all these whacknut drivers coming from?

[Coffee Warlord]

I live on a damned dead end street. Where are all these whacknut drivers coming from?

Just a warning Jim, just a warning.

The Penguin is watching you.

[Ben E Lou]

Where are all these whacknut drivers coming from?Disgruntled people pissed off that they don't have TCY2?

[Solecismic]

Disgruntled people pissed off that they don't have TCY2?

I'd swear there are more women crashing their vans on my property than there are female customers of Solecismic Software.

[Franklinnoble]

So, early this afternoon, some crazy woman destroyed her brand new blue minivan by plowing into (and breaking) a utility pole in front of our house. Her van was totalled, but she's just fine.

Meanwhile, there's been a utility crew out in front of our house all afternoon. They've brought in a brand new pole. At some point, we're going to lose power for a few hours.

I live on a damned dead end street. Where are all these whacknut drivers coming from?
Maybe if you stopped strutting around the front law in a loincloth...?

[Ben E Lou]

I'd swear there are more women crashing their vans on my property than there are female customers of Solecismic Software.There's been a trend lately of people's wives showing up on the board. Perhaps they're getting them to do their dirty work, too.

[WSUCougar]

Disgruntled people pissed off that they don't have TCY2?
You'd be surprised how many bored soccer moms are available for hire as suburban intimidators.

[Tom E]

I heard she lost a Boyfriend to FOF...Jeebs

[QuikSand]

I'd swear there are more women crashing their vans on my property than there are female customers of Solecismic Software.

*tucked away for future QOTM use*

[illinifan999]

So she runs into your garage, drives away, and she *might* have gotten a ticket? Sweet, I hit someone going 20 and am gettin sued for 250k. That's perfect. I'm moving by you.

[Tasan]

I can't believe I missed this the first time around....
wow

Front Office Mini-Van, anyone?

Seriously though, I'd go the disgruntled wife of a FOF player route.

[kingnebwsu]

Nooooo! You stole our cheesy jokes for the day. Front Office Bad Joke Ruiner ;)

SI

Sweeeeeeeeeeeeeeet :) This made me chuckle ;)

[vex]

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/20511369/

[kingnebwsu]

Dang, one less thread kill for me :p

[k0ruptr]

hmm, after reading, am I the only one waiting for Under Office Garage Smashing?

[StarBuck]

Since she was lying and showed no remorse about what she had done to you I would have required more than the apology, especially bcause of leaving the scene. Yea I know, I'm pretty unforgiving that way. Your a nicer guy than I am. :-) Maybe she needed to learn a lesson on such things because she is not getting it from the father and I'm not conned by a 16 year old girl's tears like cops and her father are. I'm a big believer in tough love. Hopefully this scare will wake her up and she will drive safely from now on.

[vex]

Ha, we should do a followup, two years later;)

[SackAttack]

Your a nicer guy than I am. :-)

And coming from a member of the femalian race, I guess you can take that one to the bank.

(Yes, I'm being annoyingly literal. Boo hoo.)