Breaking News - Lance Amstrong

[Anthony]

Associated Press - Lance Armstrong's record setting seventh Tour de France victory, along with his entire Tour de France legacy, may be tarnished by what could turn out to be one of the greatest sports scandals of all time.


Armstrong is being quizzed by French police after three banned substances were found in his South France hotel room while on vacation after winning the 2005 Tour de France. The three substances found were toothpaste, deodorant, and soap which have been banned by French authorities for over 75 years.


Armstrong's girlfriend and American rocker Sheryl Crowe is quoted as saying "we use them every day in America, so we naturally thought they'd be okay throughout Europe." Along with these three banned substances, French authorities also found several other interesting items that they have never seen before, including a backbone and a testicle.

[NoMyths]

*snicker*

[jbmagic]

LOL :)

[Draft Dodger]

oldest. joke. ever.

[Galaxy]

Who cares..

[Kodos]

Hmmm. It smells better at the front of the pack. This explains his motivation for getting the yellow jersey so often. :)

[HomerJSimpson]

Great, great, great, great, great. Did I say great?

[stevew]

I think we decided a couple of years ago that fake Lance Armstrong posts were a bannable offense. Certainly this thread should be deleted.

[MikeVick7]

"Hell Atlantic receives...1 star."

[scooper]

a testicle.
That is so wrong. But so funny.

[Ksyrup]

I think we decided a couple of years ago that fake Lance Armstrong posts were a bannable offense. Certainly this thread should be deleted.
No, it wasn't that. It was posting fake Lance Armstrong news as breaking.

Ban him!

[Glengoyne]

Nicely done.

[Anthony]

i didn't write this, my friend emailed it to me.

[Raiders Army]

Lance Armstrong is a putz and is extremely overrated. The testing for cycling is a joke and he was probably the biggest cheat in the game...and his acting sucked in Dodgeball.

[sterlingice]

I think someone took RA and replaced him with this guy ;) (ignore the Iraq on the bullet and the political connotations therein- I just did a search on "white flag france" and this is the best image I could find):

http://www.code7r.org/Bintoons/images/runningguy02.gif

As an aside, do you know how hard it was to come up with an image that people instantly recognize as French? The only two things I could think of were the Eiffel Tower and Pepe Le Pew (sad, I know). Depending on your connotation, there are icons for everywhere- the US has everything from John Wayne to Michael Jordan to Bruce Springstein to Richard Nixon who are instantly recognizable as something "American". Britain would be someone like Margaret Thatcher or Winston Churchill or James Bond, Italian- choose your favorite Corleone family member, Russia- everyone recognizes Stalin's likeness. Heck, Australia even has Mick Dundee. But what about France?

SI

[Schmidty]

I think someone took RA and replaced him with this guy ;) (ignore the Iraq on the bullet and the political connotations therein- I just did a search on "white flag france" and this is the best image I could find):

http://www.code7r.org/Bintoons/images/runningguy02.gif

As an aside, do you know how hard it was to come up with an image that people instantly recognize as French? The only two things I could think of were the Eiffel Tower and Pepe Le Pew (sad, I know). Depending on your connotation, there are icons for everywhere- the US has everything from John Wayne to Michael Jordan to Bruce Springstein to Richard Nixon who are instantly recognizable as something "American". Britain would be someone like Margaret Thatcher or Winston Churchill or James Bond, Italian- choose your favorite Corleone family member, Russia- everyone recognizes Stalin's likeness. Heck, Australia even has Mick Dundee. But what about France?

SI

Jerry Lewis?

[Alf]

Believe it or not, France is the most visited country.

Believe it or not again, the country that visit us the most : USA


But a big LOL to HA :)

PS : How is your ex ?

[Wolfpack]

I'd believe it. My parents, brother, sister, and brother-in-law were all there for Lance's latest win in the TdF.

It also stands to reason that with a population roughly equivalent of continental Europe that a fair number of us would visit there. :)

[Anthony]

i so hope he comes back for one more. it would be the 2nd greatest mindfuck in sports history.

the first greatest mindfuck would have been if Barry Sanders decided to unretire the year Emmit was rushing for the all-time rushing yardage record.

[MIJB#19]

To me, Lance returning for another year is a no-brainer, I never doubted he'd comeback in 2006, but I didn't expect him te re-think it all in Augustus, I put my money on December...