"That is so gay"

[kingnebwsu]

Having played a significant amount of Xbox Live and having worked in a retail environment for several years, this is a phrase I hear a lot. Sometimes it's just boiled down to "that's gay." I'm putting up a simple poll because I'm curious how many FOFC'ers use the word "gay" to describe something they don't like or something that bothers them.

I'm not going to judge people based on their votes, so be honest. It's a private poll, so nobody will be able to see what you voted. I just want an honest answer from my fellow FOFC'ers.

I probably need a strong disclaimer for a thread that could be super-controversial, so here goes...

I don't care if you think being gay is okay.
I don't care if you think being gay is the worst thing ever.

THIS IS NOT A REFERENDUM ON HOMOSEXUALITY!!!

I just want to know if this is a phrase that you use in your everyday life. If you feel like replying in the thread, try to keep your responses around the question at hand. Is it a phrase your friends/family people use? Is it a phrase you hear coworkers use? Is it a phrase you never hear used? That's the point of this thread. Stay on-topic, or I'm sure the thread will be closed/deleted.

Votes in the poll are the #1 thing I'm looking for. Thanks in advance and please (for the love of god) keep it clean :)

[st.cronin]

I never use it and have never heard it from somebody older than 12.

[Vince]

It's a phrase I use too often. There is no defense for the crudeness of the phrase, but here we go anyways...

On my floor freshman year (I lived in one of two 10-story off-campus dorms, we associated by 'floor'), there was an openly homosexual person. He was a great guy, and was my roommate for the two years following my freshman year. I'm not sure if he started it or not, but because he had become so comfortable with his sexuality, and the fact that we all supported him, the phrase "that's so gay!" was used often, more as a joke than anything else (and the phrase was used quite often by the person in question, as well).

I have many friends who are openly or privately gay, and I have a tremendous amount of respect for them, and I would never want to belittle them. Yet I still use this phrase, and though I mean no disrespect to them by saying it, I still feel bad every time I do.

[RailsFS]

I use it frequently, and I think it is one of those "generational" words. I hear it all the time when I'm out (and I'd say it is commonly used by many people, mostly male, up to around the age of 25). Then again, maybe it's a regional thing.

Oh yeah, I have to say I never use it when I'm on Xbox Live. Since one has to put up with the constant racism, swearing, etc., I figure I don't want to become one of the jackasses.....nothing worse than having to listen to an 11 year old trying to make fun of someone.

But yeah, I'd say in my area, with my age group (18-25), using the term "gay" is very common to describe something.

[RailsFS]

A little disclaimer: when using this term to describe something, it is almost never meant to be confused with anything "homosexual." Just to describe something stupid, uncool, lame, etc.

[Vince]

A little disclaimer: when using this term to describe something, it is almost never meant to be confused with anything "homosexual." Just to describe something stupid, uncool, lame, etc. Of course -- and to be honest, I usually only use the phrase around my little brother (23, one year younger than I am) or my friends from 8 North (my floor freshman year, the 8th floor of the north tower).

[SnowMan]

I hate it, and never use it. Our guild in WoW has gone as far as banning it from guild chat. It's use in online games is out of control, seems like all the kids use it these days. *sigh* I sound like an old man.

[korme]

If this thread doesn't get out of hand, then it's a sign of the apocalypse.

[Raiders Army]

Substitute retarded for gay and I wonder how this would turn out.

[jeff061]

Never use it, doesn't bother me from a offensive standpoint. It's not used to call someone or something a homosexual, it's just slang for stupid. People who overuse it tend to annoy me, it's just a low level and ignorant way to express your thoughts.

[Danny]

Never use it, doesn't bother me from a offensive standpoint. It's not used to call someone or something a homosexual, it's just slang for stupid. People who overuse it tend to annoy me, it's just a low level and ignorant way to express your thoughts.

Agreed. I am not the most articulate person you'll meet, but I am certainly able to express my thoughts without using words like this.

[Joe]

this thread is gay

[Noop]

I use it sometimes. But I use it to describe a stupid chain of events. Like getting dressed to go play basketball and it rains. I would say,"Wow thats gay as fuck oh well let me go play NCAA"

[Bee]

I never use it and have never heard it from somebody older than 12.

Perhaps because I never hang out with anyone under the age of 35, but the only people I ever hear the term from are kids (and seeing it posted on message boards, by what I assume are also kids in most cases).

Personally, it's not offensive but it just sounds childish to my ears.

[Izulde]

I say it all the time. Usually to the tune of "Christ, that's fucking gay, dude."

[QuikSand]

It is a patently offensive and bigoted thing to say 100% of the time, and it's a shame that many otherwise sensible people are somehow unable or unwilling to see that.

[Draft Dodger]

It is a patently offensive and bigoted thing to say 100% of the time, and it's a shame that many otherwise sensible people are somehow unable or unwilling to see that.

there's a lot of patently offensive and bigoted words that I like to use, usually more for shock value than anything else. this is one of them.

[Eilim]

complete tangent time that might ended up with me being flamed...

Was curious if anyone knew at what times "queer" and "gay" came into being slang terms for homosexuality, and which came first?

Dola Edit: as in which came first in being used as a slang term as such.

[MizzouRah]

I use it too much as well.

[sovereignstar]

Here's an example of when I'd use it:

Asking about towels on FOFC is so gay.

[Subby]

So what's worse? Saying "that's so retarded" or "that's so gay"?

[KevinNU7]

Every once in a while I'll catch myself saying "that's gay" and I'll cringe and try to correct myself.

[Radii]

I use it in text conversation more often than I should(from my EQ days I am sure), but I don't think I ever use it when speaking.

[kcchief19]

So what's worse? Saying "that's so retarded" or "that's so gay"? I think it's a tie. If you can't come up with something better than calling something "gay" or "retarded," go buy a dictionary. Both are sophomoric at best, downright bigoted and offensive at worst.
THIS IS NOT A REFERENDUM ON HOMOSEXUALITY!!! I think it is tagentially. I think someone who believes homosexuality is wrong is much more likely to regard that word "gay" as some kind of slur and use it as a slur. It's no different than in the Ozarks where I grew up when some of the old brain-dead hicks would try to insult a white person by saying they were a "n-----."

On the other side of the spectrum, someone who doesn't believe homosexuality is wrong I believe is more likely to perceive "gay" as a slur and will not use it in that context.

[jeff061]

I think it is tagentially. I think someone who believes homosexuality is wrong is much more likely to regard that word "gay" as some kind of slur and use it as a slur. It's no different than in the Ozarks where I grew up when some of the old brain-dead hicks would try to insult a white person by saying they were a "n-----."

On the other side of the spectrum, someone who doesn't believe homosexuality is wrong I believe is more likely to perceive "gay" as a slur and will not use it in that context.

I think most people who use the word freely don't even link it with homosexuality.

[sovereignstar]

I think most people who use the word freely don't even link it with homosexuality.

Bingo. I never link faggot with it either.

[Coder]

I don't know really.. it's kind of tricky.. I believe that overuse of a negative word could neutralize it. Whenever I use the word gay in a negative situation, it's more of a "joking" remark than actually being mad at someone.. I never find myself using the word if I'm really pissed off at something.

Interestingly enough, I - being a Swedish speaker - never use the Swedish word for gay (bög), but the English word... Maybe this is an indication that the word has already been "neutralized".. I don't know..

[Draft Dodger]

So what's worse? Saying "that's so retarded" or "that's so gay"?

guess it depends on who you are asking.
I don't like using "retarded", but I'm not sure I could come up with any logical argument as to why "gay" is ok and "retarded" is not.
for that matter, I abhor racial epitaphs, but are they patently worse than "gay" or "queer"? even with those, are there different levels? I can't even type - let alone say - the "N" word. I can write words like "chink" or "spic" or "kraut" but wouldn't ever even think to use them in speech, and would cringe (or worse) if I heard them. But I'm totally comfortable calling my British friend a "limey" or making fun of his teeth. why?

[timmynausea]

guess it depends on who you are asking.
I don't like using "retarded", but I'm not sure I could come up with any logical argument as to why "gay" is ok and "retarded" is not.
for that matter, I abhor racial epitaphs, but are they patently worse than "gay" or "queer"? even with those, are there different levels? I can't even type - let alone say - the "N" word. I can write words like "chink" or "spic" or "kraut" but wouldn't ever even think to use them in speech, and would cringe (or worse) if I heard them. But I'm totally comfortable calling my British friend a "limey" or making fun of his teeth. why?

Because British people really are inferior and have bad teeth.

[KWhit]

It is a patently offensive and bigoted thing to say 100% of the time, and it's a shame that many otherwise sensible people are somehow unable or unwilling to see that.
Yep.

I think it is horrible to use a term meaning "homosexual" as a synonym for stupid, lame, ignorant, etc. I have no idea how people can justify this and think it is not offensive.

[Butter]

So what's worse? Saying "that's so retarded" or "that's so gay"?

[bad joke]
That's so gay is worse, because the retarded people won't understand they're being insulted anyway.
[/bad joke]

*purchasing ticket for bus to hell*

[timmynausea]

It is a patently offensive and bigoted thing to say 100% of the time, and it's a shame that many otherwise sensible people are somehow unable or unwilling to see that.

This is how I feel as well.

[John Galt]

Not suprisingly, I agree with QS as well.

For those who feel it isn't their intent to disparage gays with their language choice, I just want to point out that you can offend without meaning to. Your intent does not control how a great many people perceive your language choice.

[colt45]

I agree. In theory, it's a malicious and horrible term. But, honestly, I do find myself saying it occasionally. And it's always with the guys, watching the game, someone is whinning on the sidelines or something and the comment comes out. It's an odd, natural occurance. Not one I condone, mind you. But it does happen.

[Maple Leafs]

I think most people who use the word freely don't even link it with homosexuality.Really? So if you walked around telling people you met that you were gay you wouldn't expect them to make a link either?

I've never understood folks who think that they're not insulting gay people by using 'gay' as a synonym for 'stupid', 'weak', 'sissy', etc. Is it really any different than telling somone not to be 'Jewish' and then reassuring them that "Don't worry, I wasn't talking about religion, I just meant to call you cheap and dishonest".

[RailsFS]

I agree. In theory, it's a malicious and horrible term. But, honestly, I do find myself saying it occasionally. And it's always with the guys, watching the game, someone is whinning on the sidelines or something and the comment comes out. It's an odd, natural occurance. Not one I condone, mind you. But it does happen.

I think most that use "gay" often enough would agree with this. One of those things that you say, but realize you could (should) probably substitute another word in for it.

[vex]

I use to say it a lot. But I thought it had gone out of style a few years back, never really hear it now.

[jeff061]

Really? So if you walked around telling people you met that you were gay you wouldn't expect them to make a link either?

I've never understood folks who think that they're not insulting gay people by using 'gay' as a synonym for 'stupid', 'weak', 'sissy', etc. Is it really any different than telling somone not to be 'Jewish' and then reassuring them that "Don't worry, I wasn't talking about religion, I just meant to call you cheap and dishonest".

First off, just to re-iterate I never use the word.

Second off, being stupid does not relate to being gay and there is no stereotype involving being gay and stupid, at least not that I'm aware of. Unlike the connection that exists between money and jew.

That said, obviously I can't argue what is offensive to others. I had a lesbian teacher in high school and one of the students let the slang fly. She tore him apart, otherwise she was a very nice women with a long fuse.

[rkmsuf]

First off, just to re-iterate I never use the word.

Second off, being stupid does not relate to being gay and there is no stereotype involving being gay and stupid, at least not that I'm aware of.

That said, obviously I can't argue what is offensive to others. I had a lesbian teacher in high school and one of the students let the slang fly. She tore him apart, otherwise she was a very nice women with a long fuse.


It doesn't make any sense unless you are interpreting gay in any other way as derogitory towards gay people.

If you are saying something is lame, stupid or whatever you are equating that with gay. ie gay being derogitory.

Otherwise the phrase means "that is so happy" or something.

[Maple Leafs]

Second off, being stupid does not relate to being gay and there is no stereotype involving being gay and stupid, at least not that I'm aware of. Unlike the connection that exists between money and jew.
True enough. But what if I just started using "jew" as a synonym for stupid? Wouldn't that be offensive? How is this different?

[vex]

True enough. But what if I just started using "jew" as a synonym for stupid? Wouldn't that be offensive? How is this different?
People already do.

[KevinNU7]

This thread is so jewish

[QuikSand]

I use the sideline skin, so to me this thread is so black.

[gottimd]

This thread is so jewish:mad:

[KevinNU7]

:mad:
you gotta know I'm kidding right?

[gottimd]

you gotta know I'm kidding right?
I know.

[finketr]

I use the sideline skin, so to me this thread is so black.

this thread is so yella.

[CamEdwards]

First off, just to re-iterate I never use the word.

Second off, being stupid does not relate to being gay and there is no stereotype involving being gay and stupid, at least not that I'm aware of. Unlike the connection that exists between money and jew.

That said, obviously I can't argue what is offensive to others. I had a lesbian teacher in high school and one of the students let the slang fly. She tore him apart, otherwise she was a very nice women with a long fuse.

Was she hot?

[McSweeny]

Was she hot?

now we're getting somewhere!

[Dutch]

This thread is so...American Christian white straight guy.

[JeeberD]

I use that phrase extremely rarely, but sometimes it's needed. The last time I used it was for this post (http://thecfl.net/forum/viewtopic.php?p=17221&highlight=#17221) on the CFL forum, and it was entirely warranted.

[jeff061]

Was she hot?

She wasn't bad at all, early 20's.

[Tom E]

It's a phrase I use alot...When you say don't be a dork, you offen guy's like Bill Gates. Where's the uproar...

[LoneStarGirl]

Substitute retarded for gay and I wonder how this would turn out.


Retarded is a gay word.

[Draft Dodger]

That said, obviously I can't argue what is offensive to others. I had a lesbian teacher in high school and one of the students let the slang fly. She tore him apart, otherwise she was a very nice women with a long fuse.

meh
I inadvertently used it in a conversation with a gay co-worker once. We didn't really know each other very well, so when I said it there was a brief "uh oh, what did I do here" moment. But he shrugged it off and we had a good laugh about it. I think there are a lot of situations where people are looking for an excuse to get offended, if that makes sense.

[Joe Canadian]

I don't suppose it would be okay for me to start calling the things that bug me black or asian or arab or jewish... If someting bugs you say that it bugs you, don't revert to some high school insult that is both ignorant and over used.

/steps down from soap box.

I know what I said above sounds preachy and what not... but it's true. No one would find it acceptable if I went around using the word black or african-american as in insult, so why it okay for people to use the word gay?

/steps down from the soap box below the orginal soap box

[Dutch]

But he shrugged it off and we had a good laugh about it.

What a novel idea!

[Pumpy Tudors]

This thread is starting to take its turn...

[Karlifornia]

This is something that my friends and I would say all the time back when we were, oh, 12. I let fly with a "that is gay" every once in a while, but whenever I say it I am describing something that is actually gay.

Like Dashboard Confessional.

[kingnebwsu]

Substitute retarded for gay and I wonder how this would turn out.

So what's worse? Saying "that's so retarded" or "that's so gay"?

Actually, saying "retarded" was something I was gonna bunch in with this thread, but I decided against it. If this one turns out okay, I think I'll pose the same question with "retarded" substituted in. I honestly hear people use "gay" more often than "retarded," but super-intelligent people like Conan O' Brien say "retarded" on an almost nightly basis (which goes to show you that smart people can say not-so-smart things).

I never thought this thread would reach 2 pages without people degrading themselves to being complete jackasses ;) I'll try and stay out of everyone's way and let you guys discuss.

Oh yeah, and I heard some random guy my dad was playing squash with say "little feet like a Japanese woman" the other night. I was about floored, but then I remembered that's how a lot of people think/talk in the world.

It's weird, because I swear up&down like it's no big deal, but I'll never use racial slurs or even "gay" or "retarded". It's weird because I don't think of myself as PC, but with stuff like this I walk a very straight line. Wonder if that makes any sense... ;)

[sabotai]

I use it frequently, and I make no apology for it. I also use the phrase "that's so retarded" frequently, and I make no apology for it. I also use many words and phrases that others find offensive and make no apologies for them.

What I don't do is use them in public and around people who might find them offensive. I don't walk around in the mall with friends and see something and yell "Look at that! That's so gay!!". I don't sit in the waiting room for my doctor or dentist and say "I can't beleive how long they make us wait. It's so retarded.". I don't walk up to a random black employee of a store and say "What up my nigger, can I get tha 4-1-1 on this bling-bling?"

As for here, only once have I gotten a PM asking me not to say something because it offended them when I did. I haven't used that phrase since. It was a pretty bad phrase that I don't think I've seen anyone else here use before or since so I make a conscious effort not to use it (which is easy since it's not something I say or type oftan)..

But, just for the simple fact that I use these words and phrases with friends who also use them and have no problem with them makes me a horrible person and just the fact that you know I use the words highly offends you...whatever. You think I need to grow up, I think your view on the topic is incredibly childish. I'll atleast agree to disagree.

Also, it's interesting how people keep bringing up the word "lame". Did you know it didn't always mean what it means now? Guess how it got that way. The same is probably true for most of the words people use instead of "uncool" (and some of them were probably thought of as offensive at some point too)

[Raiders Army]

sabotai, I find your post Smurfy.

[sabotai]

sabotai, I find your post Smurfy.
Hmm. I don't know if you Smurf with me or not. So I'm just going to say Smurfin' A, and a nice Smurf you as well. I think I covered all of my Smurfs.

[Antmeister]

This is something that my friends and I would say all the time back when we were, oh, 12. I let fly with a "that is gay" every once in a while, but whenever I say it I am describing something that is actually gay.

Like Dashboard Confessional.


When I was 12, gay meant happy and I would only hear this word used a lot in songs from the 60's and 70's. It is strange how this word got a negative connotation and the same thing for rainbows. I remember making rainbows with a leprechaun at the end when I was about 6 or 7 and now rainbows are looked upon with derision. To top it off, my favorite color has always been purple.

With that said, I don't ever use the phrase because of how the word is used. That goes with another term that I see a lot on this board which is faggotty. They are both foul remarks and I am surprised that people don't understand it, because the words are being linked to things that you find stupid or disapprove of.

[cmp]

True enough. But what if I just started using "jew" as a synonym for stupid? Wouldn't that be offensive? How is this different?


Yea, I've already heard that used to describe something stupid numerous times around me.

[SnowMan]

She wasn't bad at all, early 20's.Is this where someone says pics plz k thx?

[illinifan999]

I use it frequently, and I make no apology for it. I also use the phrase "that's so retarded" frequently, and I make no apology for it. I also use many words and phrases that others find offensive and make no apologies for them.

What I don't do is use them in public and around people who might find them offensive. I don't walk around in the mall with friends and see something and yell "Look at that! That's so gay!!". I don't sit in the waiting room for my doctor or dentist and say "I can't beleive how long they make us wait. It's so retarded.". I don't walk up to a random black employee of a store and say "What up my nigger, can I get tha 4-1-1 on this bling-bling?"

As for here, only once have I gotten a PM asking me not to say something because it offended them when I did. I haven't used that phrase since. It was a pretty bad phrase that I don't think I've seen anyone else here use before or since so I make a conscious effort not to use it (which is easy since it's not something I say or type oftan)..

But, just for the simple fact that I use these words and phrases with friends who also use them and have no problem with them makes me a horrible person and just the fact that you know I use the words highly offends you...whatever. You think I need to grow up, I think your view on the topic is incredibly childish. I'll atleast agree to disagree.

Also, it's interesting how people keep bringing up the word "lame". Did you know it didn't always mean what it means now? Guess how it got that way. The same is probably true for most of the words people use instead of "uncool" (and some of them were probably thought of as offensive at some point too)
sums up my feelings, I'm curious if the people who find childish/horrible use words like bitch, fuck, shit, asshole, jackass, etc.

[timmynausea]

sums up my feelings, I'm curious if the people who find childish/horrible use words like bitch, fuck, shit, asshole, jackass, etc.

I use those words. The reason I don't say something is "gay" is because to me it is bigotry. It'd be like saying something is "a bunch of nigger bullshit" or etc. It's completely different from saying fuck.

[illinifan999]

I use those words. The reason I don't say something is "gay" is because to me it is bigotry. It'd be like saying something is "a bunch of nigger bullshit" or etc. It's completely different from saying fuck. Not really, the term at least in my age bracket has replaced stupid. When describing a gay person he's either a homosexual or a fag not gay. Either way many people are offended by the usage of the f word and you are a horrible, childish person for using it. And the term gay is bigotry, what makes the term bitch not sexist? Call a girl a bitch and bad things happen.

[Antmeister]

When describing a gay person he's either a homosexual or a fag not gay.

Okay this part just confused me.

[illinifan999]

Okay this part just confused me.
Just that people around me don't describe a homosexual as gay. Gay has replaced stupid or dumb. Pretty much how happy gay became homosexual gay.

[sabotai]

I use those words. The reason I don't say something is "gay" is because to me it is bigotry.
bigot: One who is strongly partial to one's own group, religion, race, or politics and is intolerant of those who differ. (dictionary.com)

To me, a bigot is based off of beliefs. You can get a clue to those beliefs when using certain words in context (the biggest bigots are usually much more straightforward, though), but to me, when someone says "That's gay" or "That's retarded", they are just using slang. You may not not like the slang word, and that's fine. But to make a blanket statement that a person is a bigot for using that slang word is a bit strong.

And I'll point out that the person who turned me on to using the phrase as much as I do was a lesbian I was friends with in college. She used it all the time (and obviously had no problem with me using it). But I can't say the some for "that's retarded". I didn't get that from a retarded person.

[timmynausea]

It is a patently offensive and bigoted thing to say 100% of the time, and it's a shame that many otherwise sensible people are somehow unable or unwilling to see that.

Quik already said everything I really have to say about it, so I'll just quote this again and leave it at that.

[sabotai]

And QS is 100% wrong on this. Calling someone such a strong word as bigot because you don't like the slang they use is the very definition of intolerance, and it's a shame that otherwise sensible people are unable or unwilling to see that.

[Dutch]

Well, kingnebwsu,

Did you get what you came for yet?

[st.cronin]

And QS is 100% wrong on this. Calling someone such a strong word as bigot because you don't like the slang they use is the very definition of intolerance, and it's a shame that otherwise sensible people are unable or unwilling to see that.

does not compute

[cthomer5000]

Do some people who use the term mean it in a bigoted way? Absolutely.

Do some people use it completely free of malicious intent? Absolutely.

I find myself using it occasionally, and in my mind is synonym for "lame" or "corny."

Now I don't feel great about using it, but i don't think it's necesarily wrong... it boils down to intent. Helping blur things for me personally is the fact that I have a few gay friends who use the term in the same way. One of them is such a guy's guy that anyone and everyone would always be really surprised to find out his sexual orientation. One of the reasons most people wouldn't know is that he is pretty critical of things that are "gay" in the main-stream way (overly fashionable young men, talking with the "gay voice," etc.. ).

:shrug:

[Raiders Army]

Not to blur things even more, but I think some of what you believe about homosexuality plays a part as well. For instance, I believe it is a choice, not something that you are "born" with. In that respect, I think there is an obvious difference between being born with something (like race or some other type of handicap) and something that you choose to do.

I suppose the same thing could be said about obese people...although that could actually be a glandular problem in some aspects. I think that that is a closer analogy to homosexuality, as some people are "meant" to be that way and others (probably the majority) choose to be that way. My two cents.

[John Galt]

Not really, the term at least in my age bracket has replaced stupid. When describing a gay person he's either a homosexual or a fag not gay.

Huh? What "age bracket" is this? And are you really saying "fag" is a preferred term?

[Draft Dodger]

Not to blur things even more, but I think some of what you believe about homosexuality plays a part as well. For instance, I believe it is a choice, not something that you are "born" with. In that respect, I think there is an obvious difference between being born with something (like race or some other type of handicap) and something that you choose to do.


I don't imagine that will blur things too much, seems as how it's not even remotely on topic.

but I'm glad you were able to find another thread to add this to. Do you have this saved somewhere and just copy and paste wherever you think you might be able to fit it in?

[Mac Howard]

My ten year old daughter uses it all the time despite my efforts (or maybe because of ) to stop her. A pity because the Australian term "dag" or "daggie" with it's association with a sheep's backside is much more appropriate :)

[JeeberD]

Huh? What "age bracket" is this? And are you really saying "fag" is a preferred term?

I believe that illinifan is 17...

[vex]

Huh? What "age bracket" is this? And are you really saying "fag" is a preferred term?
Fag or homo, yes. High school to college age is all I can speak for.

[vex]

Dola

Or maybe "Ragin' Homosexual".

[sabotai]

Huh? What "age bracket" is this? And are you really saying "fag" is a preferred term?
Not speaking for illinifan, but I don't think he was saying that it's a preferred term, just that in his age group and region, fag is associated with homosexuality, good or bad. While the word gay is not.

[illinifan999]

Not speaking for illinifan, but I don't think he was saying that it's a preferred term, just that in his age group and region, fag is associated with homosexuality, good or bad. While the word gay is not.
What he said. No one in my school uses the word gay to describe a homosexual. It's either fag or homo(sexual).

[Joe Canadian]

Not really, the term at least in my age bracket has replaced stupid. When describing a gay person he's either a homosexual or a fag not gay.

Does anyone else find anything wrong with this? I go back to what I said before... "society" would never let the word black or jew replace the word stupid because we know that's wrong. But if it's gay... so what...

[Joe Canadian]

What he said. No one in my school uses the word gay to describe a homosexual. It's either fag or homo(sexual).

Is that a good thing?

[Mac Howard]

I find it offensive, despite many not seeing it as not referncing homosexuals, because, being a derogatory term, you can't help but feel that:

1) it was originally chosen for homophobic reasons
2) it's popularity is partly due to its appeal to homophobes and denied or clandestine homophobia
3) it allows some to express homophobic sentiments without appearing to be homophobic

The mutation of the word "gay" from happy to homosexual to stupid would make a good PhD subect.

[Dutch]

I find it offensive, despite many not seeing it as not referncing homosexuals, because, being a derogatory term, you can't help but feel that:

1) it was originally chosen for homophobic reasons
2) it's popularity is partly due to its appeal to homophobes and denied or clandestine homophobia
3) it allows some to express homophobic sentiments without appearing to be homophobic

The mutation of the word "gay" from happy to homosexual to stupid would make a good PhD subect.

So you have to hate gay people to say "that's gay"? Give me a break.

[JeeberD]

So you have to hate gay people to say "that's gay"? Give me a break.

I agree. Like I said before, I use that term on very rare occasions, but I do use it. And I have a cousin who is gay, an aunt who is gay, and a future bro-in-law who is gay...and I love them no matter what.

[Logan]

I agree. Like I said before, I use that term on very rare occasions, but I do use it. And I have a cousin who is gay, an aunt who is gay, and a future bro-in-law who is gay...and I love them no matter what.

I mean no disrespect, but it took me a few seconds to understand the gay brother-in-law (since all my in laws are the spouses of my brothers/sisters).

[JeeberD]

LOL!

Yeah, my lovely lady's brother is gay. I'm not going to marry a guy...and I don't think they allow that in Texas anyways...

[st.cronin]

No, not everybody who uses this expression is necessarily a 'homophobe.' But everybody who uses this expression sounds like an uneducated fool.

[illinifan999]

I find it offensive, despite many not seeing it as not referncing homosexuals, because, being a derogatory term, you can't help but feel that:

1) it was originally chosen for homophobic reasons
2) it's popularity is partly due to its appeal to homophobes and denied or clandestine homophobia
3) it allows some to express homophobic sentiments without appearing to be homophobic

The mutation of the word "gay" from happy to homosexual to stupid would make a good PhD subect.
Do you use the word bitch ever?

[Dutch]

No, not everybody who uses this expression is necessarily a 'homophobe.' But everybody who uses this expression sounds like an uneducated fool.

Now that I can accept. :)

See, I get to say "That's gay" and you get to say I'm an uneducated fool. I think that's a fair trade off.

[st.cronin]

Now that I can accept. :)

See, I get to say "That's gay" and you get to say I'm an uneducated fool. I think that's a fair trade off.

It was a pleasure doing business with you, sir.

[Dutch]

It was a pleasure doing business with you, sir.

Glad it's over with, it was quite gay.

[st.cronin]

Glad it's over with, it was quite gay.

You sound like an uneducated fool.

[Crapshoot]

Aha Dutch - the "intellect" (or lack thereof) who thinks homosexuality is a pre-cursor to bestiality. I suppose you have no problem with the n-word then ?

[Antmeister]

Aha Dutch - the "intellect" (or lack thereof) who thinks homosexuality is a pre-cursor to bestiality. I suppose you have no problem with the n-word then ?

Nudist please!

[Mac Howard]

So you have to hate gay people to say "that's gay"? Give me a break.

Take the break to understand what's said. Since when did "despite not many" or "is partly done" or "allows some" mean "all"?

The point I'm making is that there's a great deal about the conversion of "gay" - clearly the homosexual community's preferred term for themselves - into a derogatory term that comes out of homophobia. For those who are not homophobic to use the term in this way is at best insensitive and carelessly reinforces the homophobic's agenda.

Do you use the word bitch ever?

Very occasionally. But since when have women seen the term bitch as anything other than an insult? :)

[DanGarion]

So like isn't the term gay slang for homosexual?

Anyway my girlfriend and I discussed this yesterday. The correct spelling is "ghey" and basically what it means when you say "that's so ghey", is that it's SOOOOO stupid or blantantly not gay that it's "ghey"! Like she pointed out some emo boys with those terrible jeans/pants that they shrink down to fit their legs and I commented that it was "ghey", for the reason that it was SOOOOO wrong a person that was gay would be offended to wear anything of the sort.

Anyway it's not the best term to use but I use it every once in awhile. And my friends that are gay use the term as well, so it's not offensive to them.

[Dutch]

You sound like an uneducated fool.

I can't argue with that.

Aha Dutch - the "intellect" (or lack thereof) who thinks homosexuality is a pre-cursor to bestiality. I suppose you have no problem with the n-word then ?

I figured this one would pop up sooner. I do find the n-word offensive and never use it. I refuse to see the plight of the American black and homosexuals on parallel lines.

The point I'm making is that there's a great deal about the conversion of "gay" - clearly the homosexual community's preferred term for themselves - into a derogatory term that comes out of homophobia. For those who are not homophobic to use the term in this way is at best insensitive and carelessly reinforces the homophobic's agenda.

It is most clearly, at best, incensitive. I can agree with that. Because I don't give a damn if somebody is getting offended when I say "That's gay". Because you know what, unless I'm talking about you...I'm not.

[Raiders Army]

I don't imagine that will blur things too much, seems as how it's not even remotely on topic.

but I'm glad you were able to find another thread to add this to. Do you have this saved somewhere and just copy and paste wherever you think you might be able to fit it in?
Nope