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View Full Version : life and death...wow


Raven
01-25-2006, 08:03 PM
I'll have to give some background info on this one first.....

I worked for over two years in a restaurant that I left recently. It was a small place, maybe 20 employees tops. I had been there since it first opened, and stayed there because I was good friends with the owner, liked him and wanted him to succeed.

There was a kid that worked there, his name was Anthony. He was roughly 18 at the time. He started as a dishwasher, and after a couple months became a cook. After doing that for about 9 months or so, he was named a manager. Originally he was just supposed to run the kitchen, but eventually took it upon himself to stretch the boundaries of his job. I think the owner wanted to groom him, knowing he was a good worker, and cared about the place. Anthony and I were at one point friends. We got gym memberships together, and I would pick him up and take him there. It didn't take long for that to change.

He was immature, irrational and inexperienced. This often carried over in to his relationships with the other employees, and the way he interacted with them. In other words, he was on a power trip. It was a cycle. He would get really bad, then someone (usually me), would have a talk with the owner. He would then confront Anthony and he would settle down for a while. After a few months of being calm, Anthony would go back to his old ways. Rinse, repeat.

Eventually it got to the point where I realized nothing was going to change. Despite the fact that I really liked the owner, and my job, I gave my two weeks and moved on. The rest of the staff wanted to do the same. Some did, and some didn't. Those that didn't still all feel the same way about the situation, but stayed for one reason or another.

Since September, I have been working in another restaurant and have had very little contact with anyone from the old place, except a select few friends. Anthony, I never planned on speaking to him anymore. I didn't like him and he didn't like me. Fine, thats the way things are sometimes.


I get a call yesterday. Anthony had cancer. He had testicular cancer, which went untreated and eventually spread to his lungs and brains. Last Tuesday he was admitted to the hospital, and they found two tumors on his brain. They were going to treat him for chemo, but wanted to take care of the tumors first. Yesterday morning, things took a turn for the worse. The tumors had ruptured and Anthony went braindead. He was living only by the help of a respirator, and it was determined he would be a vegetable for the rest of his life.

His mother had already made the decision to pull the plug, she just wanted to wait for his brothers to arrive from out of town. I got a call around 8pm tonight, and it is done. They pulled the plug and he is no longer with us. He wasn't even 20 years old yet.


I am sad and I am hurt by this. It feels so strange talking about the reality of our relationship....it wasn't good, but it was true. I am sure now that his irrational behavior was often affected by his unknown health problems. It's a shame that we never got to make amends.

stevew
01-25-2006, 09:14 PM
Sounds like this cocksucker manager we got where I work. Totally useless, big head, goes way beyond the call of what he is supposed to do, and he's utterly incompetent. While I don't wish death on him, I do wish him no success. When we were just regular employees together, I thought he was a half decent guy, but he started to change.

I know you probably feel bad about making amends, but his phone works too, he could have called you and apologized as well. I've come to the conclusion that I'm not supposed to like everyone I meet, and they arent supposed to all like me. In short, feel bad for his mom, and his brothers, but dont feel bad about not making amends. You'll lose sleep over it and you've already moved on.

Lathum
01-25-2006, 09:55 PM
Don't feel bad about not making amends, you had no idea. Just remember the reasons why you liked him and know that he is in a better place now.