The Video Game Tagline Challenge!

[Coffee Warlord]

Me and a buddy got to joking about various movie themes, and started spouting silly video game -> movie conversions.

View the summer lineup!

One creature. Alone. Determined. No mountain too high. No predator too crafty. This summer, prepare to Ascend.... Q-Bert

This sunday. The dead will walk. And only one man can save the world from their wrath. His only weapon? Hunger. Pacman: The Movie

Christmas. The Freeway. The Lifeblood of the city. Joyrides. Commutes. Innocent and Innocuous. But for one little creature, something so mundane can become the adventure of a lifetime. Walt Disney Pictures, in conjunction with Pixar Studios, bring you a tale of struggle and the heroism of one little creature. A creature named: Frogger

6000 years ago, an epic struggle began. A cruel despot sent out a single wanderer to forge an empire. This friday, the spearmen will march, and history will be forged in blood. Civilization

So, for our own personal wednesday amusement....The Game.

Pick a popular video/computer game that is totally unsuitable for a real movie, write a little tagline/trailer voiceover for it. First person to correctly guess the game gets to come up with the next one. And so on, and so on.

10% bonus points for the most ridiculous/funny ones. There are no points awarded ever.

And to start things off...





Deep space. Lonely. Dark. Forbidding. A vessel, cut off from the fleet. A warship, designed to take on any foe. But there was one foe that the crew could not expect. Space itself. This Summer, prepare to stare face to face with Mother Nature at her most deadly. Prepare for the onslaught of...

[KWhit]

Asteroids.

[Coffee Warlord]

Ding!

[Pumpy Tudors]

Damn, I was gonna guess Defender.

[KWhit]

Walt Disney Pictures is proud to present the feel good family adventure of the summer. After tragedy strikes his family, a young boy is forced to make it on his own. Viscous dogs. Burglars. Runaway cars. None of them are a match for the…

[Coffee Warlord]

...Paperboy!

[KWhit]

Yep.

[Coffee Warlord]

5000 AD. On a distant planet, mankind settles their disputes not on the battlefield, but in single combat. This is the story of a young man born into the skies of the arena, and his constant avian friend. This summer, grab your weapon, take to the skies, and prepare to...

[KWhit]

I know. But I'll let somebody else answer.

[John Galt]

Joust.

[Coffee Warlord]

And somewhere in a dark corner, some hollywood flunky is taking notes about these. :)

And ding ding for the all powerful Joust.

[John Galt]

This summer, join this cast of misfits on the hardwood. Watch the crowd pleaser, rebound king, and deadeye shooter show their stuff on the rough and tumble basketball courts. No blood or no pants, no foul. When honor is on the line and you are willing to do anything to win, you become . . .

[John Galt]

dola, apologies in advance if I went too obscure. I just wanted to pick one of my ATF video games.

[Maple Leafs]

Arch Rivals?

[condors]

basketbrawl

[John Galt]

Arch Rivals?

Correct!

[Maple Leafs]

Hot damn. I have no idea how I knew that. This must be the sort of information that stays in my head, pushing out things like friends' birthdays and the color of my wife's eyes.

[Maple Leafs]

In a world where the streets are controlled by vicious gangs, two brothers stand together for justice. This is a story of honor, devotion -- and of the one woman who could turn them against each other. This summer, some things are worth fighting for.

[Eaglesfan27]

Double Dragon

[stevew]

They actually made a double dragon movie, though.

[stevew]

dola
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0106761/

[Swaggs]

This thread has potential. :)

[Maple Leafs]

Double Dragon
Of course.

[SnDvls]

Waiting on the really bad "Maximun Football" description

[stevew]

In a world of vanilla convention(show some generic pictures of madden 94)
Against all odds(Daivd "We'll feature teleportation!" Antmeister-- the game "won't work with those variables")
Sidelined by love(some random footage of jennfir and daivd fighting/loving/her punching out someone to get to the front of the McDonalds line)
And Time (show random clips of Daivd in military prison, obligatory hand on the divider window shown while talking on the prison phones)
He created (Daivd "I think i got the rogue to work" Antmeister "What about the framerate?" D-"Poppycock")
A Maximum Masterpiece(Random footage of big footed canadians changing player's uniforms quickly)

[JonInMiddleGA]

I believe this tagline would be a good starting point for Maxmium Fotoball
Unspeakable Horrors From Outer Space Paralyze The Living And Resurrect The Dead!

[Karlifornia]

So are we waiting on EaglesFan? I have solid idea for one....but I'll wait for him

[Coffee Warlord]

It's been awhile, go for it.

[stevew]

Contra.

[Karlifornia]

Coming this summer, from Monolith Pictures:

*cue Slow Ride by Foghat* When Peter Pepper woke up, he had no idea what kind of pickle he'd find himself in. His job was his craft, and no amount of hot dogging could keep him from satisfying the most primal of hungers. Or so he thought...This August, its time...it's....

[John Galt]

Burger Time!

[stevew]

Burgertime

[stevew]

f*ck, slow on the draw by a nano second.

[Karlifornia]

John Galt is teh winnar!

[John Galt]

A man. Alone. In the ancient jungles. He must avoid the legendary quicksand and bottomless tar pits. Unarmed, he will prevail in the face of ferocious crocodiles, deadly scorpions, and fierce rattlesnakes. On September 30, Uwe Boll brings you . . .

[ISiddiqui]

Pitfall

[stevew]

dagnabit.

[John Galt]

Isiddiqui is right!

[ISiddiqui]

On a strange world... one man is on a quest to free his love from the clutches of evil. He will have to face strange and deadly creatures on his quest as he navigates castles and underground pipes. Jumping to a theater near you...

[Daimyo]

Super Mario Bros.

[ISiddiqui]

Correct.. and yes, I know there is a movie on it already

[Daimyo]

A bit of a stretch, but I think it fits the general idea nicely. :)

Two armies evenly matched across the board meet in an epic battle replayed throughout history. Many will be captured, a few will rise up to be crowned as Kings. In the end only one side can be victorious. This summer, prepare yourself for the experience of a lifetime, the experience of ....

[ISiddiqui]

LOL! I know that one, but since I'm going home soon, I'll let someone else answer.

[Pumpy Tudors]

A bit of a stretch, but I think it fits the general idea nicely. :)

Two armies evenly matched across the board meet in an epic battle replayed throughout history. Many will be captured, a few will rise up to be crowned as Kings. In the end only one side can be victorious. This summer, prepare yourself for the experience of a lifetime, the experience of ....
Sounds like checkers to me!

[John Galt]

Checkers? (I'm sure that's not right, but it seems to fit)

Battle Chess?

[stevew]

Gotta be battle chess, if not for that Kings should be queens minor detail.

[Maple Leafs]

Checkers? (I'm sure that's not right, but it seems to fit)

Battle Chess?
Battle Chess was awesome.

[John Galt]

I have one ready to go, but I'm not sure if Battle Chess is right. The trailer seems open-ended enough to include an array of similar games.

[Maple Leafs]

I'm pretty sure he meant checkers.

[John Galt]

I'm pretty sure he meant checkers.

Oh well. Checkers as a video game? I should have just put that in and beat Pumpy to the punch.

[Maple Leafs]

Go ahead... I don't see Pumpy in the thread any more.

[John Galt]

Three heroes. Isolated and alone in the big city. Despised by everyone around them. With nothing left to lose and no hope for finding a quiet, peaceful life, they are left with only one choice: total destruction. This January, join them on their . . .

[John Galt]

dola, i see Pumpy has now entered the thread. Feel free to preempt my trailer.

[John Galt]

double dola, looking around I see that Checkers was a game on the Atari 2600 by Activision. Who knew?

[Coffee Warlord]

Three heroes. Isolated and alone in the big city. Despised by everyone around them. With nothing left to lose and no hope for finding a quiet, peaceful life, they are left with only one choice: total destruction. This January, join them on their . . .

That's gotta be RAMPAGE!

[John Galt]

That's gotta be RAMPAGE!

Winner! Good guess.

[Coffee Warlord]

From the deepest parts of space, they came. The fleet destroyed, the survival of humanity rested in the hands of two simple starship pilots.

...and one of them is in the hands of the enemy.

This summer, join their fight to save Earth. The fate of humanity is in their hands.

[Pumpy Tudors]

Yeah, I've gotta run home. I can't do one right now.

[JonInMiddleGA]

From the deepest parts of space, they came. The fleet destroyed, the survival of humanity rested in the hands of two simple starship pilots.

...and one of them is in the hands of the enemy.

This summer, join their fight to save Earth. The fate of humanity is in their hands.

Galaga

[Coffee Warlord]

Galaga

Ding.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Ding.

Thank you sir,

In this strange looking place, there are plenty of targets ...
but you're one of them. It's a deadly game of hide and seek when machines engage in a battle to the death.
Who will triumph? Who will survive?
Get - Ready - To - See - GREEN
in the ...

[Fighter of Foo]

Mildly related. For inspirational purposes only:

hxxp://www.apple.com/trailers/miramax/comedian.html

[SackAttack]

Thank you sir,

In this strange looking place, there are plenty of targets ...
but you're one of them. It's a deadly game of hide and seek when machines engage in a battle to the death.
Who will triumph? Who will survive?
Get - Ready - To - See - GREEN
in the ...

Combat Zone?

[JonInMiddleGA]

Combat Zone?

Very very very close ... but not quite.

[SackAttack]

Yeah, I know what game you're talking about, but I'm blanking on it.

Not Combat Zone.

Battlezone?

[JonInMiddleGA]

Battlezone?

Correct sir.
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/en/thumb/4/4f/Arcade-atari-battlezone1.png/250px-Arcade-atari-battlezone1.png

[stevew]

Mildly related. For inspirational purposes only:

hxxp://www.apple.com/trailers/miramax/comedian.html

LOL I forgot about that.

A ROBOT Renegade Cop!

[SackAttack]

Every boy has a dream.
Drive the dump truck, rule the world, or just dish out happiness, two scoops of chocolate chunk marshmellow ice cream at a time.
Roger's dream was to plumb the murky depths...of space.
In five, terror-filled moments, that dream was shattered, and Roger set off on a new adventure.
A new quest.

His...

[Raven Hawk]

Space Quest?

[Coffee Warlord]

You gotta say it right. Spaaaaaaaaaacccceeee Queeeeeeeest!

[SackAttack]

Sorry for the silence, guys. Realized I was running late to umpiring. It was indeed Space Quest.

[Raven Hawk]

You gotta say it right. Spaaaaaaaaaacccceeee Queeeeeeeest!

I'll take that as a "correct." :)

When you're already 6 feet under, death may be a forgone conclusion. Every moment that you spend drilling could be your last. Armed only with a drill, a hand pump and local geology, Hori must face the unimaginable beasts of the underworld. This summer, you'll burst with delight when you see . . .

[SackAttack]

Dig Dug!

[Raven Hawk]

Dig Dug!

Winner!

[Neon_Chaos]

"This summer."

"Are you ready?"

"One ship"

"A never ending amount of choreographed alien invaders"

"Prepare"

"Galaga!"

[sterlingice]

Awesome thread :D

SI

[Pumpy Tudors]

Well, even though I missed my turn, I'm giving you guys one anyway.

A fire burns within the heart of every competitor. For one young man, the fire leads him to the park. A slab of wood and a handful of tickets blaze his trail to freedom. Living his life on wheels, he has all the time in the world... until he hears the sickening buzz of death. Desperately searching for a sanctuary, his heart races and his palms sweat. He feels his temperature rising - rising all the way up to...

[Maple Leafs]

720!

[Pumpy Tudors]

Right-o, Leaf-o!

[Maple Leafs]

I hated that game. Didn't it have that weird angled joystick?

[Maple Leafs]

They all hoped I'd be straight. But I can't help what I am. Now everything keeps piling up, and I feel like I'm free fall. Which way can I turn? And will I ever fit in? Or is this all some sort of sick game? The game of ...

[Pumpy Tudors]

I hated that game. Didn't it have that weird angled joystick?
Yeah, I think so. On top of that, the bees always made me cry, yet I kept playing. :(

[ISiddiqui]

They all hoped I'd be straight. But I can't help what I am. Now everything keeps piling up, and I feel like I'm free fall. Which way can I turn? And will I ever fit in? Or is this all some sort of sick game? The game of ...

Tetris?

[Maple Leafs]

Tetris?
Correct.

[Barkeep49]

Ok this looks like fun. I hope I can get something in the next couple of hours.

[st.cronin]

This has got to be on the short list for the dorkiest threads this board has ever seen.

[ISiddiqui]

This summer, one man is on an epic quest to save his princess. He will have to go to the ends of the world on his way to unite three ancient objects of divine power and save the woman he loves...

[Barkeep49]

Legend of Zelda?

[Chubby]

legend of zelda

[ISiddiqui]

Barkeep wins.

[Barkeep49]

"From the people who brought you"

Picture of a rail gun. Quick flash to black before being replaced by a picture of a demon

"And"

Picture of Hitler

"Comes..."

Black stays on screen for a moment before being replaced by a picture of a pogo stick

"This fall nobody can stop Billy..."

Beat

"Except for maybe his babysitter."

[Barkeep49]

Won't be around until later so if Chubby, or someone else, wants to do one since I won't be around to verify the answer, I'd understand. Though I do think mine is a good one :D

[sterlingice]

Since this thread has died, it's time to revive it with a guess of Commander Keen

SI

[Barkeep49]

Commander Keen is of course correct.

[sterlingice]

When monkeying around in this game, make sure you're hammered or you could be barreled over trying to save your girl.

SI

[JPhillips]

Donkey Kong

[sterlingice]

Donkey Kong

Of course

SI

[JPhillips]

They called it a suicide mission. One man against an endless enemy. A jet with unlimited weapons, but limited fuel. Flying perilously close to the raging rapids below, this would be the his hardest mission ever. Can he survive the....

[stevew]

River Raid

[JPhillips]

Yes.

[stevew]

Sorry, went away for most of the day.
This one's probably easy.

Lightning quick reflexes and superior aim make Frank Zapper one of the premiere young hunters in the avian world. In the quest for his first major title, Frank must overcome the biggest obstacle in the path of his victory...a laughing dog.

[TargetPractice6]

Duck Hunt

[stevew]

Oh yeah, it's duck hunt.

Bump, let's try to keep this one going.

[sterlingice]

bump

SI