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View Full Version : The phone call I hate.....aka Death Sucks


MacroGuru
09-21-2006, 09:50 PM
Yeah,

In Flasch's grandpa thread I posted a bit about mine, however, I need to post a bit more. You see, I am at work in Arkansas for this month, I said goodbye to my grandfather the day before I left, he was deteriorating, but not much, just his mental health mainly, but he just couldn't shake an infection.

Well, sitting at work today, my phone went off like a time bomb, 4 calls within three minutes and a text from my wife saying 911 call.....I knew at that point, the man that raised me since I was ten, passed on.....

What can I say, that was the worst phone call I have ever had to take, it was the worst thing I ever had to do, walk up to my boss and say "I know we are launching this massive conference that is going to make or break the company, but my grandfather passed away and I have to go."

I'm not crying because he died, I know he is with my grandma and is happy, I am sad, because I lose pure and simple, my hero. The man I molded myself after, the one who always had time to talk, the person who would cook a growing teenager that was playing football steak and eggs for breakfast on gameday, knowing I would need the energy for the night and then bitch to me about how the game was destroying my body, but couldn't wait to hear the stories when I got home......

For my cousins they are going to be burying a grandfather, for me I am going to be burying in a sense, my father.....

Sorry to post here like this, but I have no one to talk to, my wife is back home in Utah, I have the next flight out in the morning, I just needed to post my thoughts, feelings, emotions to get them out..........

dervack
09-21-2006, 09:53 PM
Man, I'm sorry to hear that.

RedKingGold
09-21-2006, 09:54 PM
I know it means nothing to solve the pain you are going through, but my thoughts and prayers are with both you, your grandfather, and your family tonight.

Take care...

GoldenEagle
09-21-2006, 09:54 PM
Sorry for your loss. If you are in LR and want to get together for a drink tonight or something, let me know.

Craptacular
09-21-2006, 09:55 PM
Don't be sorry to post this ... it's good to get things out. Take care.

MacroGuru
09-21-2006, 09:58 PM
Sorry for your loss. If you are in LR and want to get together for a drink tonight or something, let me know.

Wish I was, I am in Bentonville......or I would take you up on this offer.....cause I need to get my mind off of this for a bit....

duckman
09-21-2006, 10:53 PM
I'm very sorry for your loss, MG. You are in my prayers.

M GO BLUE!!!
09-21-2006, 11:14 PM
Sorry to hear. I know the feeling.

One of the dearest women I ever had the pleasure of knowing was my grandmother. She had Alzheimers, and one day after work I thought about stopping by her place. It's a good thing I didn't. A couple hours after I got in my aunt called me and said "This is a call I never wanted to make..." If I had went to her place when I left work I would have got there about the time the ambulance did.

God bless...

digamma
09-21-2006, 11:17 PM
My best. Take care.

Flasch186
09-21-2006, 11:21 PM
im feelin for you......good luck and have faith.

Neuqua
09-21-2006, 11:22 PM
Sorry to hear it. You take care of yourself.

MacroGuru
09-21-2006, 11:25 PM
Thanks everyone, this has helped a lot...it's off to bed for the 4:30 am wake up to get ready for the 5:15 am drive to the airport.....

Groundhog
09-21-2006, 11:29 PM
Very sorry to hear about this. :(

It won't be long before I'm in a similar spot, unfortunately. My father died when I was very young and my grandfather played a massive role in bringing me up. Over the past 2 years he's had a leg amputated (diabetes), as well as a stroke that has left him a shell of the man he used to be, and he's getting worse each day.

It's real hard for me to deal with at times, and I don't know how I'm going to react when the inevitable phone call comes in the not too distant future.

MacroGuru
09-22-2006, 12:14 AM
Very sorry to hear about this. :(

It won't be long before I'm in a similar spot, unfortunately. My father died when I was very young and my grandfather played a massive role in bringing me up. Over the past 2 years he's had a leg amputated (diabetes), as well as a stroke that has left him a shell of the man he used to be, and he's getting worse each day.

It's real hard for me to deal with at times, and I don't know how I'm going to react when the inevitable phone call comes in the not too distant future.

Sounds like we are same...we experienced the stroke as well, his memory was in and out at times, and it was great for me, when I saw him on the day before I flew out, he remembered me, and knew who I was....when he saw my kids, he cracked a joke....

Said I must have read a book to make kids so beautiful and I told him I did, he was the one that wrote it....he beamed...laughed.....and said he might have....but he never saw any checks from the sales....

Anyways, If you need someone to talk to, ever....I am here as well...and I can honestly say....I have been through it...

TroyF
09-22-2006, 12:22 AM
I sympathize with both of you. My grandfather didn't raise me, but he has been one of the most important people in my life. I moved back to Denver for the sole purpose of being close to him. Last Thanksgiving I went through a stretch where I received 8 surprise phone calls in just over three months, every one of them saying he was on his way to the hospital and things didn't look good. (and they weren't over reacting, he was literally seconds from death on multiple occasions)

He's slightly better now, but still not good. I know I'm going to get the phone call you recieved today sometime soon. And no matter how hard I prepare myself, I know it'll be the most difficult one I've taken to this point in my life.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

johnnyshaka
09-22-2006, 12:55 AM
Very sorry for your loss, MG.

I know what you mean about "the phone call"...two years ago, November, my wife woke me up early on a Sunday morning, my little brother was on the phone. He didn't sound good and told me that dad was in the hospital, his heart had stopped that morning, while he was sleeping. My mom had to wake my brother and his girlfriend to try and revive him while she called 911. Thank god my parents live a block away from a fire station. He survived, but he's not the same guy I remember growing up or even a couple of years prior to this episode. Anyway, getting that phone call was probably one of the worst moments of my life...despite the fact that he is fine...it was more about the helpless feeling I had because I'm so far away (I'm in Edmonton and they are in Ottawa) and couldn't do a damn thing for him.

This past Tuesday he had his 3rd open-heart surgery in 15 years and with the shape he's in these days, I knew when I hugged him good-bye at the airport in August that there was a good chance it could be the last time I see him. Well, when my cell phone rang Tuesday afternoon and saw that it said "Mom and Dad", I didn't want to answer it. Sitting at my desk at work, I tried to stay calm long enough to hear my mom say that the doctors said he should be just fine. Man. I know it's early and at his age, recovery is not as easy as it used to be, so he's not out of the woods yet. But, it will be very nice to be able to see him again.

Lorena
09-22-2006, 01:19 AM
I'm sorry for your loss MacroGuru :(

Poli
09-22-2006, 01:25 AM
Rest easy, my friend. My condolences.

Northwood_DK
09-22-2006, 02:15 AM
Sorry to hear it MG. Stay strong.

Emiliano
09-22-2006, 02:19 AM
So sorry to hear it Dennis. My condolences to you and your family.

CleBrownsfan
09-22-2006, 06:19 AM
Sorry to hear about your grandpa. It's always hard losing someone you love. My thoughts are with you and your family...

Ksyrup
09-22-2006, 07:13 AM
Sorry for your loss.

I hate the fact that I'm getting to that age where every off-hour phone ring automatically comes with that "dread" feeling. Other than my aunt passing away a couple of years ago, we've been fortunate, but obviously, those kinds of calls are coming at some point.

stevew
09-22-2006, 07:22 AM
Sorry for your loss.

stevew
09-22-2006, 07:24 AM
Sorry for your loss.

I hate the fact that I'm getting to that age where every off-hour phone ring automatically comes with that "dread" feeling. Other than my aunt passing away a couple of years ago, we've been fortunate, but obviously, those kinds of calls are coming at some point.

Yeah, my grandfather is 93 and holding strong, but my other grandma is 82ish, and fading quickly. I feel the same way when i get an abnormally timed call.

Eaglesfan27
09-22-2006, 09:17 AM
My deepest sympathy. My grandfather passed away a few years ago, and he was also like a father to me, moreso than my actual father. It was one of the hardest periods of my life. You and your family will be in my prayers.

sachmo71
09-22-2006, 09:24 AM
I'm sorry for your loss.

Icy
09-22-2006, 09:28 AM
I'm sorry for your loss Dennis.

vtbub
09-22-2006, 11:33 AM
:(

WSUCougar
09-22-2006, 11:41 AM
So sorry to hear this, MG. My condolences.

Don't be sorry to post this ... it's good to get things out. Take care.
Most definitely agreed. Having grief pent up inside certainly magnifies it. Most - if not all - of us have been there in some form or fashion. We share your loss.

Gary Gorski
09-22-2006, 03:20 PM
Sorry to hear this Dennis - our thoughts and prayers will be with you and your family. If there's anything I can do, let me know.

SirFozzie
09-22-2006, 03:25 PM
God Bless, Mac..

MIJB#19
09-22-2006, 04:30 PM
:( My condolences.

Carry on with what you do. As you said, he was your hero and you are molded after him. That means he'll live on as a part of you.

MizzouRah
09-22-2006, 04:49 PM
Sorry to hear about your loss, have a safe trip tomrorrow. :(

Cringer
09-24-2006, 02:57 PM
Dennis, I know first hand you are a good guy, and your grandfather must have been, too. Sorry for your loss.

terpkristin
09-24-2006, 03:00 PM
Wow, this is the first time I've seen this thread. I'm so sorry for your loss, Dennis. That call is the worst. :(

/tk

ibnsgirl
09-24-2006, 04:15 PM
I'm not sure which is worse, getting the phone call or having the big, dark car come up your driveway. EIther way, the effect is the same, and the hurt is as real.

You are in Tony and my thoughts and prayers. :(

MacroGuru
09-25-2006, 01:10 AM
Thanks again everyone.....I have been home since Friday and I have had an honor bestowed upon me by the family (either that, or they know I am the only that likes to talk)....I am the one conducting the funeral services as well as providing the tribute speech towards my grandfather.

To me, this is the ultimate, I get to pay homage to him in a big way, in front of everyone, and just let them feel the love and joy he has brough to my life...

Also, he was a veteran of WWII and was able to keep his rifle, I was presented this tonight by my aunt, she stated that the entire family felt I deserved it. It brought tears to my eyes and a deep love for all....

Thanks again, I truly appreciate it everyone.......