I had to commit my wife to the hospital for phsychiatric evaluation - Chapter 3 - AMA

[Toddzilla]

As you may remember, a few weeks ago someone broke into my house. They didn't take much, but the personal violation was much greater that I had realized. Since that day, my wife has been extremely manic - getting 1-2 hours of sleep a night (if any at all) and obsessively writing everything down she could. Making lists, organizing her thoughts, planning things. Every conversation became a regimented discussion - one person talked, the other listened then presented their retort. Nothing could get done without a written plan. Suddenly she became very afraid of the dark, and strange noises scared her to death. and she was terrified of strangers. More recently she began to have more grandiose plans - that involved the war in Iraq, the President and his cabinet, and involving the world media. She believed she was being called by a higher power to accomplish her missions. All through this awful process, I would try to tell my wife that I was concerned for her, concerned for her actions, her change in personality, and her erratic and unpredictable behavior.

So yesterday my mom came up and we told my wife that we were afraid that something may have happened to her, like a mini-stroke that affected her personality, and we should go the the hospital to check it out. My wife agreed to go, under the condition that we call the press to document her journey and the hospital would release a statement every hour about her condition.

After a long long stay in the ER, we saw a psychiatrist who talked to my wife for about 45 minutes and then suggested that she get in-patient care. My wife said no, but my mother and I objected. My wife then agreed to stay, and after another long wait we were taken up to the psychiatric ward.

My wife refused to sign any papers or take any medications and told them she was going to leave, so I had to step in one final time and say that she would not be allowed back in our house or allowed to see me or my daughter until she got evaluated, diagnosed, and treated. At that point she basically gave up, signed her papers and rolled over to sleep.



Now I know I probably made the right decision - I cannot imagine putting myself or mu daughter through another day of what we had been going through, especially how bad things were yesterday. I hope that at the end of this ordeal my wife will be back, because the person I've been living with for 2 weeks wasn't my wife. It may have been the right decision, but the taxi I took home from the hospital last night to come home and sleep in my own bed was the longed most agonizing ride I've ever taken. I was able to kiss my daughter and put her to sleep knowing that she was safe, and that helped.

Please keep my family in your thoughts and prayers. I don't know how this is going to turn out. I don't know when my wife will come home, what condition she'll be in, how she will feel about me, how she'll act. I've got to trust that things will work out, but it's too far away from me now to feel it.

[Gary Gorski]

Wow, I'm very sorry to hear you're going through such a terrible thing - I can't even begin to imagine how hard this is on you. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family.

[Ksyrup]

Holy cow, that's awful - and so completely unexpected. And during the holidays, too. That must have made it that much worse. I'll be thinking of you and your family.

Without divulging too much - if you feel you can say much else - what appears to be the issue? Is it really a reaction to the break-in? I have to admit, I'm curious to know how something like this happens, since I've fortunately never had to deal with it.

[Kodos]

So sorry to hear about your situation. I hope your wife gets better soon and that your family life can get back to something approaching normalcy as quick as possible. Hang in there. It sounds like you did the right thing, as difficult as it must have been to do.

[Emiliano]

Sorry to hear that. I hope things get better ASAP for you and your family.

[JPhillips]

I'll say a prayer for you. My wife went through a breakdown after 9/11 when she believed that she had done something that led to the attack. It took several days before I could convince her to see someone. The good news is that she got the right medication and it quite literally changed her life. I hope you and your wife can be as lucky as we were.

[KevinNU7]

That is just terrible. I can't even think what to say.... You did the right thing.

[Butter]

Good luck to you both... you have done the best you can so far. I hope everything improves for you.

[vtbub]

Thoughts and prayers.

You did the right thing.

[wade moore]

I hadn't seen the story about your break-in sicne I wasn't around for the holidays so this is a double suprise.

I will keep you and you family in my thoughts. I hope that when your wife recovers she will easily be able to see that you did everything you did out of love for her and your daughter.

[spleen1015]

Good luck man. Keep us posted.

[Warhammer]

Your family will be in our prayers. I am sure that when she gets the right treatment she will thank you for what you did.

[albionmoonlight]

Sorry. Thoughts and prayers for you.

[flere-imsaho]

Good luck and I hope things turn out alright.

[TroyF]

good luck, that's just horrible news. Hope the stay works out for everyone.

[Flasch186]

holy cow, im so sorry....

Has there ever been behaviors similar in the past? Its so shocking to come out of the blue....wow, I hope it all gets better for her. and you.

[KWhit]

I can't imagine what you must be going through right now. Be at peace with your decision - you trusted your instincts and did the right thing. It sounds like you are pretty confident that you did the right thing. Good. If you start to doubt it, remind yourself that you did what is best for her and your daughter.

From everything you have said, you did the right thing. Just make sure that you remember that.

So sorry for you and your family. You'll be in my thoughts.

[ISiddiqui]

Wow... I'm sorry. Though you did everything correctly, just remember that (even if it doesn't feel like it at some points).

[Radii]

Oh my goodness, that sounds like a horrible situation. You definitely did the right thing and it sounds like you are handling it extremely well. I hope everything works out.

[Buccaneer]

That truly saddens me. I will pray for peace, strength and healing for her and your family.

[Honolulu_Blue]

Sorry to hear this. Good luck to you and your family and I hope the docs can help your wife out and get things right with her again.

[Julio Riddols]

My thoughts with you and yours, man.. Hopefully everyone comes out of this no worse for the wear and you all can resume a normal life.

[samifan24]

What you did was very brave. You and your family are in our prayers.

[21C]

My prayers are with you and your family. I hope all goes well.

[KWhit]

What you did was very brave.

Yes. I didn't mention that it my post, but it was a very brave thing to do. That's the right word for it.

[MikeVic]

I'm sorry, this must be a tough situation. :( Best of luck.

[Klinglerware]

Good luck to you and your family. I don't know what I would have done if I were in your situation...

[Poli]

Todd, you're one of my favorite people here at the board. I'll pray for you and your family as you go through this difficult situation.

[digamma]

Good luck. Sounds like you have kept a level course through this and have a good head on your shoulders. Will be thinking of you.

[wade moore]

Yes. I didn't mention that it my post, but it was a very brave thing to do. That's the right word for it.

Ditto. I should have said something like, "I don't know if I would be brave/strong enough to do the same thing - the RIGHT thing".

[MacroGuru]

My prayers are with you and your family, and I admire your courage and strength.

[st.cronin]

Not much to add other than that it sounds like you did the right thing, and I expect a full recovery. Keep your chin up.

[CleBrownsfan]

My thoughts are with you and your family. You for sure did the right thing and my prayers are there for your wife to be healed and to come home soon. Stay strong my man...

[Oilers9911]

Wow man, I am terriblly sorry to hear this. You have my thoughts and prayers. Just a question, was there any sign of this before the break-in? Maybe this is some type of PTSD caused by the break in?

[hukarez]

Hope everything turns out okay, Toddzilla. :(

[heybrad]

Stay strong. I can somewhat relate as years ago my wife had some issues that led eventually to a suicide attempt. We sought out help immediately and it was life changing.

Good luck.

[Antmeister]

I can't even imagine how difficult that was to make that choice, but as an outsider looking in, it appears to have been the best choice since you have done it for the safety of everyone. I wish for a healthy recovery for your wife and I hope that you have a guilt-free conscience.

[bryce]

That sounds truly terrible. I do hope it all works out asap. I can't imagine that kind of frustration and feeling of helplessness. I mean, I understand physical ailments, be it high cholesterol, knee surgery, even cancer or something horrible, these are things that have a definitive plan of action for treatment, and a resulting recovery can be foreseen because the ailment is easily identifiable, but when it comes to mental and pyschiatric issues like this, I know I for one just don't get it, it's just hard to relate when the brains are on different wavelengths, which, for me, would be that much more heartbreaking. In any event, you sound like you are on top of things and definitely did the right thing, so best of luck.

[oykib]

I can't imagine how tough this is for you and your family. You'll be in my prayers.

[Lorena]

Wow Todd, I'm so sorry to hear that :(

You all will be in my thoughts.

[CamEdwards]

Todd,

You and your family are in my thoughts and prayers as well. I hope that everything turns out okay.

[John Galt]

That's horrible. Sorry to hear it.

[Northwood_DK]

I don’t know what to say. It’s sad but you absolutely did the right thing. Hope things turn out alright for you and your family.

[NoMyths]

A hard one. You and your family are in my thoughts.

[Eaglesfan27]

Your description makes it sound like a classical manic episode which can be triggered by extreme emotional stress among other things. Mania can potentially be very dangerous. You certainly did the correct thing and from dealing with many families in my work, I know it was probably extremely hard to do. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[FBPro]

I can't imagine what you have had to deal with and also how hard making the other decisions have been. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[Toddzilla]

Your description makes it sound like a classical manic episode which can be triggered by extreme emotional stress among other things. Mania can potentially be very dangerous. You certainly did the correct thing and from dealing with many families in my work, I know it was probably extremely hard to do. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.One of things that has me puzzled, and other non-doctors who have experiences with people in manic phases, is that on two occasions my wife actually got a long nights sleep. Once on New Years Day, and once last night (aided by some anti-anxiety medication). In both cases, she's woken up super-energized and has picked right back up with more mania than ever. She was running through the house yelling at the top of her lungs for 30 minutes 2 days ago. She still feels she's got super powers.

Right now - almost noon in the EST - she has not seen a doctor or a psychiatrist. She was visited by a nurse once and has not been offered any kind of medication. My fear now is that she is going to get lost in the system - that the glacial pace at which things move coupled with being surrounded by some very sick patients that can only feed into her delusions - and she is only going to get worse in this environment and not better. When I talked to her nurse this morning to get an update, the first thing she told me was "I don't even know why your wife is here." That IMO does not inspire any confidence in me that my wife will get the care she needs to get better and come home.

[Ben E Lou]

Oh man, oh man. Thanks for sharing this, TZ. You and yours are in my prayers.

[condors]

I hope everything works out. I wish you and your family all the best

[MizzouRah]

Can't add much, except you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers Todd. :(

[Icy]

Sorry to hear that but i think you did what you had too, showing real strength as it must be a really hard decision to take. Don't feel guilty, you didn't left your wife even if that feeling crosses your mind, you are doing the right thing to get her healed. You both are in my thoughts.

[bbor]

Chin up my freind...things will get better.

[Joker]

This just sounds very difficult and the only thing I can offer is I had a friend who went though a similar situation. He was very hyper and went for days without sleeping. He made huge lists and large plans how he was going to start his own company and he'd get REAL happy. Then boom, he'd get real depressed. He was maniac depressive they found out and was bi-polar. They gave him medicine to balance him out and he's doing quite well. I also recall when the Raiders played the Buccaners in the SuperBowl that the center for Oakland took off and had a huge medical problem similar to this. He never played again.

[Eaglesfan27]

One of things that has me puzzled, and other non-doctors who have experiences with people in manic phases, is that on two occasions my wife actually got a long nights sleep. Once on New Years Day, and once last night (aided by some anti-anxiety medication). In both cases, she's woken up super-energized and has picked right back up with more mania than ever. She was running through the house yelling at the top of her lungs for 30 minutes 2 days ago. She still feels she's got super powers.


It is not that uncommon, although it is somewhat of a bad pronostic factor, for someone with mania to get a very good night sleep aided by benzodiazepenes or other hypnotics and still have significant-severe mania the next day. However, several studies have shown that sleep (even medication induced sleep) is the most important factor in stopping a manic episode. I'd encourage you to be a strong advocate and insist on talking to the psychiatrist ASAP. If the psychiatrist doesn't get back to you byt the end of the day, I would be calling frequently pushing to speak to him/her.

[CraigSca]

Absolutely horrible news, Todd. I'll have you and your family in my prayers tonight.

[Deattribution]

Hope everything works out for you, your wife and your daughter. It sounds like you made the best decision for her, and I am sure she will understand once things settle down.

[AnalBumCover]

My heart goes out to you. I'm adding you and your family to my prayers.

[kcchief19]

I can't imagine how hard it was, but it absolutely sounds like you're doing the right things to take care of here. Stay strong and positive -- hang and there and best wishes.

[Swaggs]

You are a strong husband and parent to make such a tough decision like this. Hopefully she can get some treatment and rest, so that she can have a speedy recovery. Thoughts are with you.

[Drake]

My wife is bipolar, so I hear where you're coming from. Your family is in my prayers, Todd.

[Vinatieri for Prez]

It is not that uncommon, although it is somewhat of a bad pronostic factor, for someone with mania to get a very good night sleep aided by benzodiazepenes or other hypnotics and still have significant-severe mania the next day. However, several studies have shown that sleep (even medication induced sleep) is the most important factor in stopping a manic episode. I'd encourage you to be a strong advocate and insist on talking to the psychiatrist ASAP. If the psychiatrist doesn't get back to you byt the end of the day, I would be calling frequently pushing to speak to him/her.

Yes, definitely be the squeaky wheel (a nice squeaky wheel, but squeaky nonetheless). And good luck to you and your family with this.

[Bad-example]

Sounds like you are doing a brave, excellent job in dealing with a nightmare situation. I hope they find a way to help.

[clintl]

My thoughts are with you and your family. I hope everything turns out well.

[Raiders Army]

Sorry to hear this. I hope everything turns out okay.

[Lathum]

Todd sorry to hear this.

My family went through something similar a couple of years ago when my sisters ex husband commited suicide. Allthough the situation is different at some point my family had to make the descion to hospitilize her for her safety and her children. I understand what you are going through and you without a doubt made the correct descion. My sister is doing much better and I am sure your wife will rebound to her own self.

[JediKooter]

Sorry to hear about your wife. I hope she has a speedy recovery.

I don't know if your work provides it or not, but, some employers cover mental wellness and can recomend perhaps a facility better suited for her condition. Sounds like a red flag with what that nurse said.

[Cork]

I hope your wife has a speedy recovery.

-Cork

[Neuqua]

I cannot imagine how I would fare in your exact position. You are a much stronger person than I. One can only hope that this is a turning point for better things for both you and your daughter.

Best of luck.

[CU Tiger]

Todd,
You, your wife, and daughter are in my thoughts. I am amazed by the strength you are showing.
Honestly when I stop and look at it, my wife is the gel that keeps our family running, not sure what i woudl do in your situation.
God Bless, and I pray life returns to normal ASAP

[ice4277]

Sorry to hear this. You and your family are definitely in my thoughts and prayers.

[cougarfreak]

Man........you made the right decision. Hope it all works out and your wife and family can make a speedy and full recovery. Thoughts and prayers.

[Draft Dodger]

hope everything works out, TZ. that's a heartbreaking story.

[FrogMan]

yes, amazingly heartbreaking and sad. Good luck with it, hang in there.

FM

[cubboyroy1826]

Wow sorry to hear that Todd. Hang in there you did the right thing for your family which is what is most important. My prayers are with all of you.

[Sporkimata]

I feel for you. I myself am Bi-polar and it had led to a lot of hardships in my life. With the right combo of meds and therapy, she will get a lot better. I would suggest perhaps getting her to a psychiatric hospital. Ive been in them 5 times over the last year, and it is a good place to get meds worked on in a safe enviroment. Good luck, and its great to see you being so patient with her, many people see mental illness as a major stigma, and would have left long ago. Your in my prayers.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Wow... I pray for your wife that she is able to put things back together and overcome this.

God Bless your family.

[GoldenEagle]

Best of luck. If it is not to personal, please keep us updated.

[WSUCougar]

God bless, and stay strong for your family. They need you and you've made them proud already.

[terpkristin]

Wow, Todd..

Hang in there, I'll be thinking of you and yours/trying to send some good vibes on the relatively short trip. I think you made the right decision, I hope that she gets the treatment she needs.

/tk

[Toddzilla]

It's been a very long hard arduous day. She's had access to a telephone and has made perhaps 100-150 hone calls to various people and places today. I've received about 50 of them. Each one is different, each one is from a different state of her mind.

Medically, she has been seen by a psychiatrist - whom I talked to at great length today - and the doctor is of the opinion that she is bipolar manic depressive and suffering delusions. The doctors want her to start taking two medications immediately - Depakote and Zyprexa (ping: EF27) - but she steadfastly refuses. Nothing I say has been able to even make her budge. This issue - putting her on medication - appears to be the single biggest issue in her life, and at the moment she appears to be willing to give everything up.

Conditions and attitudes and situations change frequently - I was able to visit her for an hour tonight and the roller coaster ride was fast and furious - but another day ends and there is no end in sight. I cannot allow her to return home without a proper evaluation and a course of treatment, so at this point I don't know when or if my daughter will ever see her mom again.

[dawgfan]

I can't even begin to imagine the difficulty of your situation Todd, but know that you are doing absolutely the right things and that you are in our thoughts, hoping that things turn out OK for you and your family. Stay strong.

[wade moore]

It's been a very long hard arduous day. She's had access to a telephone and has made perhaps 100-150 hone calls to various people and places today. I've received about 50 of them. Each one is different, each one is from a different state of her mind.

Medically, she has been seen by a psychiatrist - whom I talked to at great length today - and the doctor is of the opinion that she is bipolar manic depressive and suffering delusions. The doctors want her to start taking two medications immediately - Depakote and Zyprexa (ping: EF27) - but she steadfastly refuses. Nothing I say has been able to even make her budge. This issue - putting her on medication - appears to be the single biggest issue in her life, and at the moment she appears to be willing to give everything up.

Conditions and attitudes and situations change frequently - I was able to visit her for an hour tonight and the roller coaster ride was fast and furious - but another day ends and there is no end in sight. I cannot allow her to return home without a proper evaluation and a course of treatment, so at this point I don't know when or if my daughter will ever see her mom again.

Hang in there. From what I know (from the sociology side of the fence from several of my college courses, one specifically in mental illness) the refusal to take medication is not at all foreign. Even if not in a manic state or whatever, on level days many people have a hard time accepting taking medication to alter their behavior. And this is even people who have accepted that they are sick, which it seems like perhaps your wife has not?

I'm just saying I think this is a pretty normal stage and I wouldn't let it in itself discourage you too much.

When I can get into my library (it's in the bedroom and my fiance is asleep) I want to grab a couple of books to recommend you reading as you go through this process. Rather than highly technical psychiatry books they are a little lighter and from the sociology perspective or actually memoirs from folks going through similar situations - might give you a good perspective on what she is going through and maybe realize that what she's going through in these early stages is not uncommon - but is generally a phase that will pass.

[MizzouRah]

You have me glued to this thread Todd, please keep us updated.

[CamEdwards]

Hang in there Todd. As everyone has said, you ARE doing the right thing, no matter how hard it is. If you need any help, I'm right down the road and would be happy to help out any way I can, even if it's doing yardwork or the other little things that need to be taken care of so you can spend more time with your daughter or at the hospital. Just let me know.

[Antmeister]

Damn...with the latest news, it is difficult for me to suggest that you must keep your hopes high. In fact, I can't offer any kind of advice in this manner. I just hope that someone here has a relative, friend, acquaintance that has gone through a similar situation and can offer advice in way of alternatives.

It is my hope that in some way, there is a chance that you find a solution or something close to it. Just keep doing what you are doing and stay as solid as you can. Hopefully there will be something that helps the situation. Good luck and take care.

[stevew]

Sorry about the situation, I hope they are able to help her.

[johnnyshaka]

TZ...I hope things workout for the best for you, your daughter, and your wife. You are all in my prayers.

[KevinNU7]

Todd, how old is your daughter? How is she taking it?

[Celeval]

Good luck, Todd - you're in my thoughts and prayers as well.

[Mota]

You might end up having to sell your house and buy another.

This happened to a friend of mine, as long as they lived in the negative environment they were basket cases. Once they sold their house and moved into a new one, they immediately got much better. Matter of fact, just listing the house helped them as they no longer felt like it was "their house", so they did not feel quite as violated.

[DaddyTorgo]

wow todd. truly unfortunate news. you and yours will be in my thoughts in the coming days. i've had several acquaintences who were bipolar, and it can definately be a struggle, but with medication she ought to be able to return to something approaching her old self.

question for EF27...is this likely some sort of temporary manic/bipolar episode brought on by the break-in that is likely to pass, or is it more likely that it triggered something that was latent that will remain? I know you obviously can't comment on the specifics of TZ's wife's case, but how common/uncommon would a temporary episode be versus something that was latent being revealed and sticking around?

[Glengoyne]

Best of Luck ToddZ. You are in my prayers.

Thanks for the update. Stick to your guns, and above all listen to the doctors. This is really one of those times when there is no such things as a stupid question. If something the doctor says or does doesn't make sense, ask about it. Take your time, and keep your wits about you when you are talking with the doctor. It will help keep you sane, as you will have information rather than questions.

Good Luck

[JonInMiddleGA]

Todd -- I think wademoore makes a very good point about this being a pretty common stage for a lot of manics (and some with other disorders), try not to let it get you down too much further than the situation surely already has.

FWIW, in very layman's terms, both Depakote & Zyprexa are used in cases like this as mood stabilizers. I can't add anything about the latter, it's use for this purpose is relatively new, but from my own experience I can say that Depakote is pretty good stuff.

[BYU 14]

This has to be one of the toughest situations anyone could face, but I too believe you are taling the right course of action, and echo many others that it took a lot of courage. Hang in there and god bless you and your family.

[Toddzilla]

Todd, how old is your daughter? How is she taking it?Lesley is 4, will be 5 in February. She's got CP and so is behind her peers physically and developmentally, but she's a bright fun kid. When her little sister dies almost 2 years ago, Lesley had just turned 3 and it was - predictably - devastating. Because of that, separation anxiety has always been a very big issue for Lesley. It isn't always an issue - she will let us leave her with a babysitter sometimes - but at other times me just getting up from the dinner table to go get something from another room causes her to panic. This case has been different so far. Lesley knows Mommy isn't at home - the therapist we took Lesley to when Cassie died told me yesterday the best way to handle the situation is to avoid using the terms and phrases we used for Cassandra when she had to go to the hospital. So we tell Lesley that her Mom isn't feeling well and she's seeing a doctor (avoiding "sick" and "hospital" at all costs). Once in a while Lesley will ask "Where'd Mommy go?" but for the most part she seems content to be with me and my mom. Lesley is a creature of habit, so we are sticking to her routine as closely as possible - she still goes to daycare and pre-school even though I'm off from work this week.

I think this hasn't affected Lesley as much because for the past 2 weeks, Mommy wasn't acting like Mommy usually acts. Lesley had been getting really nervous around my wife and was becoming scared - very much so the last few days which is the main reason I decided to have my wife removed from the house. Lesley is also very empathetic, and I know she can tell that I'm stressed out and I'm pretty sad, so just like I am trying to be extra nice to her, she has been even more of an angel to me.

[Eaglesfan27]

It's been a very long hard arduous day. She's had access to a telephone and has made perhaps 100-150 hone calls to various people and places today. I've received about 50 of them. Each one is different, each one is from a different state of her mind.

Medically, she has been seen by a psychiatrist - whom I talked to at great length today - and the doctor is of the opinion that she is bipolar manic depressive and suffering delusions. The doctors want her to start taking two medications immediately - Depakote and Zyprexa (ping: EF27) - but she steadfastly refuses. Nothing I say has been able to even make her budge. This issue - putting her on medication - appears to be the single biggest issue in her life, and at the moment she appears to be willing to give everything up.

Conditions and attitudes and situations change frequently - I was able to visit her for an hour tonight and the roller coaster ride was fast and furious - but another day ends and there is no end in sight. I cannot allow her to return home without a proper evaluation and a course of treatment, so at this point I don't know when or if my daughter will ever see her mom again.

Everything you've said makes me think of patients that have Bipolar with psychotic features (which can be just delusions.) In this case, it sounds like she is in the manic phase which is many ways the most difficult to treat. Many patients with Bipolar refuse to take medications when they are manic because it feels like being on the greatest high, or so they have told me and coming down from that can be very tough. It is extremely common for patients with a first break of mania to refuse medication for days or even in some cases weeks. Furthermore, patients that are manic aren't in their right mind and don't listen to reason from family members which can be maddening to them. I'd urge you to continue to be supportive, which I'm sure you are already doing, and continue to talk to her doctors.

As far as the ping regarding those specific medications. Speaking in hypothetical generalities, for a patient who has Bipolar with psychotic features, that is a very common and a good combination. Depakote is considered a first line drug for Bipolar disorder and can be used in treating the acute phase of the illness as well as a maintainence drug to reduce reoccurences. The biggest drawbacks to the drug are the rare chance of hepatic damage/failure and pancreatic damage. More common side effects include weight gain, upset stomach, among others. I'd urge you to read all literature. However, in general, Lithium which is the other first line treatment for maintainence of Bipolar has even more side effects including risk of Kidney failure with long term use, cardiac issues, and other issues (tremor, weight gain, thyroid issues, etc.)

Again speaking of hypothetical general patients, Zyprexa is a very good antipsychotic that I would only ever use in the acute phase of mania. It's very good for that because it is very good at inducing sleep. I generally don't use it long term anymore (although some psychiatrists do) in part because there are a lot of lawyers suing over its use and it causing metabolic syndrome which is a combination of weight gain, diabetes, elevated cholesterol, and elevated triglycerides. The data shows that in many patients Zyprexa does cause weight gain and it may cause diabetes independent of the weight gain.

In short, if this was my wife in this situation from the facts I know, those two medications would probably be the exact treatment I would want the psychiatrist who was treating her to be using. However, I would want her outpatient psychiatrist to get her off the Zyprexa within a short period of time and onto another antipsychotic if any was even needed. Frequently, once the mania is stabilized, no antipsychotic is needed. However, I'm just offering hypothetical information, and I'd strongly urge you to address any questions you have to your wife's treating psychiatrist. It sounds like he/she knows what they are doing.

[NoMyths]

Everything you've said makes me think of patients that have Bipolar with psychotic features (which can be just delusions.) In this case, it sounds like she is in the manic phase which is many ways the most difficult to treat. Many patients with Bipolar refuse to take medications when they are manic because it feels like being on the greatest high, or so they have told me and coming down from that can be very tough. It is extremely common for patients with a first break of mania to refuse medication for days or even in some cases weeks. Furthermore, patients that are manic aren't in their right mind and don't listen to reason from family members which can be maddening to them. I'd urge you to continue to be supportive, which I'm sure you are already doing, and continue to talk to her doctors.

As far as the ping regarding those specific medications. Speaking in hypothetical generalities, for a patient who has Bipolar with psychotic features, that is a very common and a good combination. Depakote is considered a first line drug for Bipolar disorder and can be used in treating the acute phase of the illness as well as a maintainence drug to reduce reoccurences. The biggest drawbacks to the drug are the rare chance of hepatic damage/failure and pancreatic damage. More common side effects include weight gain, upset stomach, among others. I'd urge you to read all literature. However, in general, Lithium which is the other first line treatment for maintainence of Bipolar has even more side effects including risk of Kidney failure with long term use, cardiac issues, and other issues (tremor, weight gain, thyroid issues, etc.)

Again speaking of hypothetical general patients, Zyprexa is a very good antipsychotic that I would only ever use in the acute phase of mania. It's very good for that because it is very good at inducing sleep. I generally don't use it long term anymore (although some psychiatrists do) in part because there are a lot of lawyers suing over its use and it causing metabolic syndrome which is a combination of weight gain, diabetes, elevated cholesterol, and elevated triglycerides. The data shows that in many patients Zyprexa does cause weight gain and it may cause diabetes independent of the weight gain.

In short, if this was my wife in this situation from the facts I know, those two medications would probably be the exact treatment I would want the psychiatrist who was treating her to be using. However, I would want her outpatient psychiatrist to get her off the Zyprexa within a short period of time and onto another antipsychotic if any was even needed. Frequently, once the mania is stabilized, no antipsychotic is needed. However, I'm just offering hypothetical information, and I'd strongly urge you to address any questions you have to your wife's treating psychiatrist. It sounds like he/she knows what they are doing.

Great, great information. You're a wonderful resource, EF.

[Flasch186]

and a heck of a nice guy.

[Lorena]

Todd, my heart truly goes out to you. My eyes are welled up with tears right now just thinking of what you must be going through. This isn't something I normally talk about (not even to my dear husband) and I never mentioned this to anyone on the board but, my dad has what your wife has and he has been taking medication since he was a kid. At one point he stopped taking them and he went pretty nuts. So nuts in fact that he was found wandering around and eventually ended up in a psychiatric hospital.

Anyway, long story short, he also refused to take medication (Depakote, just like your wife) but once he realized what my mom, sister and everyone out there (at the time we lived in Phoenix) went through, he decided to take it and it made a WORLD of difference.

You're a very courageous and caring person to do what you did. When I found out what happened to my dad, I froze and cried; I couldn't possibly do what you did, major kudos to you.

Like I mentioned earlier, my heart goes out to you and I'm hoping for the best. Good luck and I'm keeping my eye on this thread.

[Toddzilla]

A shitload of really great information and adviceThat is a shitload of really great information and advice. I feel much much better about where I am in the process and where my wife is headed in the process thanks to what you wrote. Thank you so very very much!

[vtbub]

Hang in there. You are doing the best you can, guy.

[DaddyTorgo]

sometimes i feel like with all the pinging and advice EF27 gets we should be paying him or like...buying him his copies of solecismic games for free or something.

stay strong TZ...you're a great guy by all accounts, and hopefully this is just another bump in the road (although you don't really deserve another) that you will overcome.

[Eaglesfan27]

That is a shitload of really great information and advice. I feel much much better about where I am in the process and where my wife is headed in the process thanks to what you wrote. Thank you so very very much!

I'm very glad to have helped in some small way. Your wife, you, and your family will continue to be in my prayers.

[Barkeep49]

I had refrained from commenting because I don't really know you, but I was most saddened when I read the initial post. I can only imagine the strength it's taken you to stand up for your wife and daughter in this way. To hear that it sounds like she is getting good care is a relief. You will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. Good luck with this struggle.

[JPhillips]

You're a hell of a strong guy to get through all you've had to deal with. I truly hope things turn around for you. God bless and good luck.

P.S.- I'm probably not much help being on the Maryland side, but if you need something don't hesitate to ask.

[JeffNights]

Todd, PM sent.

[st.cronin]

sometimes i feel like with all the pinging and advice EF27 gets we should be paying him or like...buying him his copies of solecismic games for free or something.


and the congregation said amen

[Buccaneer]

Despite my experiences in life, I have never witnessed or been around mental illnesses, esp. of this sort. I am surprised (and ignorant) to read how relatively common this can be. I am at a loss for words because I can't comprehend this. Please hang there and continue to love with your heart.

[Drake]

Bipolar disorder isn't all that common, Bucc (in terms of mental illnesses), but people who have been around someone with bipolar for very long tend to remember it.

In many ways, my wife's bipolar disorder has ruined my life. For me, though, it was a relief to know that she was mentally ill rather than just a big bag of nutty evil. You can treat mental illness. Evil is a bit more intransigent. Fortunately, my wife is finally on bipolar meds (Lamictal) after the last couple of years of sundry anti-depressants, which really, really, really fucked with her illness. (We only recently -- like in the last three months -- learned that it was bipolar disorder after 3+ years of believing it was just depression with a side order of obsessive/compulsive disorder). Fortunately, my wife is Bipolar 2, which isn't quite as extreme in the mania department, but it is still more than I feel like I can cope with much of the time.

I'll refrain from saying more in this thread, as Todd really doesn't need to hear it right now.

On the other hand, my boss at work also happens to be bipolar (and prone to really grandiose delusions -- like when he had his first manic episode in his 20's, he flew down to the Bahamas and tried to overthrow the government), and he's successfully navigated his illness with Lithium (and without a major manic episode) for the last twenty years.

That said, I need to get off of here because my wife is still up and has been obsessively researching natural pharmacopeia all day with an eye towards becoming a biochemist because she believes that mint extract is a cure for cancer, but The Man is hiding it from the world.

I wish the above paragraph was a joke.

[Eaglesfan27]

Bipolar disorder isn't all that common, Bucc (in terms of mental illnesses), but people who have been around someone with bipolar for very long tend to remember it.


Most epidemiological studies indicate that 1% of the population has Bipolar.

[Drake]

<post rescinded for idiocy>

[Drake]

<This one, too.>

[Drake]

<And yes, this one.>

[KevinNU7]

This thread got akward

[Eaglesfan27]

Ignoring everything else in the last few posts, I do highly recommend "An Unquiet Mind" by Dr. Kay Jamison as well as all of her other books. They are excellent reads.

[Toddzilla]

I'll refrain from saying more in this threadThat would be the biggest gift you could give to me and this board moving forward. Thank you.

[vtbub]

Todd,

Besides this board, what is in place for you to help keep your head clear?

[Toddzilla]

Well, I made a trip to the hospital this morning outside of regular visiting hours to bring some comfort items to my wife (blankets and a pillow, candy, writing materials an a journal). When I spoke to her this morning at 8:00 (and 8:10 and 8:30 and 9 and 9:15), she was a mess - on par with how she was acting in the ED. Her delusions had returned and she was back in the mindset that she was feeling too powerful and he would not take any medications, that she would eventually educate the doctors that she was correct.

I dropped her items off and she caught me in the hallway - I was hoping not to see her - she was calm, happy to see me, and thankful for the stuff I brought. We talked for a bit about her day and as she was seeing me off, she told me that a half hour ago she had taken the medication the doctors prescribed.

One more step forward. :)

[Toddzilla]

Todd,

Besides this board, what is in place for you to help keep your head clear?My mom is here, and she is very good at keeping me grounded. I'm playing FM a bunch and getting a few naps in. Housework is keeping me busy, too, which is a good thing for me. Thanks for checking in.

[Flasch186]

FM is a good game to dive into.

Good luck man Im praying for you and yours.

[wade moore]

I dropped her items off and she caught me in the hallway - I was hoping not to see her - she was calm, happy to see me, and thankful for the stuff I brought. We talked for a bit about her day and as she was seeing me off, she told me that a half hour ago she had taken the medication the doctors prescribed.

One more step forward. :)

Fantastic news!

[CamEdwards]

awesome news! Thanks for sharing Todd.

[Drake]

Crap. I shouldn't post in the middle of the night after the wife's gone mildly manic.

My sincerest apologies, Todd (and everyone else). I've rescinded my previous posts.

[Eaglesfan27]

she would eventually educate the doctors that she was correct.

I dropped her items off and she caught me in the hallway - I was hoping not to see her - she was calm, happy to see me, and thankful for the stuff I brought. We talked for a bit about her day and as she was seeing me off, she told me that a half hour ago she had taken the medication the doctors prescribed.

One more step forward. :)

I can't tell you how many manic patients tried to educate me on how they were right, but it literally was in the hundreds.

That is wonderful news regarding the medicine! Glad to hear that you have other support besides just the board. I'll continue to pray that your wife will take the medication and for strength for you and your family.

[Poli]

Todd, great news, I missed that post earlier!

[MikeVic]

Good to see positive news!

[lordscarlet]

I haven't posted much (ok, anything) here but I've been trying to keep up. I have an ex live-in girlfriend that was diagnosed bipolar before we started dating. She was largely unmedicated (kept a stash for when she started to feel manic) and I was lucky enough to not see any sever episodes. However, I saw a lot of minor things that it caused and I can imagine how hard a a true manic episode would be. I'm glad to hear that she has decided to take the medications, but in my experience and from what I've heard it can become a battle everyday to make sure that keeps going. Some of the meds have side effects that make people not feel like themselves and they start to feel mania is better than being on the drugs. Good luck to you and your family.

[Izulde]

I can echo EF27's comments about Zyprexa being an excellent sleep aid. In my case, it worked a little -too- well, though, so I had to be switched to something else that I unfortunately can't remember the name of right now. (Dropped it about a month later because I found I worked the best on Lamictal by itself)

Good luck in dealing with this, Todd. It's not an easy thing I know, but with time and persistence, you can both get through this.

[Ksyrup]

My mom is here, and she is very good at keeping me grounded. I'm playing FM a bunch and getting a few naps in. Housework is keeping me busy, too, which is a good thing for me. Thanks for checking in.


If you don't mind me asking, one thing I've noticed in your posts is a lack of references to her family. Does she have family, or are there issues that would prevent them (or you would like to prevent them) from helping with her situation?

[Toddzilla]

EF:

I talked to my wife tonight and she seems to be improving. On a scale of 1-10, where 10 is "normal", she was a 1 in the ER on Tuesday and yesterday, today after some meds she's now a 2.5. She's no longer manic, she sounds calm, but she's got a ways to go. Do you have any idea how long it takes for the medications to bring a person "back to reality" for lack of a better term? I get the feeling she still believes all of the things she did before, she just doesn't have the manic energy anymore.

[Toddzilla]

If you don't mind me asking, one thing I've noticed in your posts is a lack of references to her family. Does she have family, or are there issues that would prevent them (or you would like to prevent them) from helping with her situation?Her father is the only parent she has - her mother committed suicide when she was 20 (we had been dating for about a year). Her dad is a grade A jackass. He's the NASA scientist who is the most brilliant mathematician I ever knew and also the most inept person at relating to people (Autistic - Aspbergers perhaps?). She has an aunt that lives in Scotland who has been very supportive from far away.

Also, her extended family is very supportive. Her step mother is an ER doctor and general practitioner, so she has been very helpful with the medical side of isseus recently.

[GoldenEagle]

It sounds like to me it was just a serious of unfortunate incidents and that the break in was the final straw. But then again, I am not trained in any type of stuff like this and I do not know you and your wife personally so I could be way off.

[Eaglesfan27]

EF:

I talked to my wife tonight and she seems to be improving. On a scale of 1-10, where 10 is "normal", she was a 1 in the ER on Tuesday and yesterday, today after some meds she's now a 2.5. She's no longer manic, she sounds calm, but she's got a ways to go. Do you have any idea how long it takes for the medications to being a person "back to reality" for lack of a better term? I get the feeling she still believes all of the things she did before, she just doesn't have the manic energy anymore.


On average Depakote takes 4 days to reach a steady state in the blood and the rest of the body. However, most doctors don't start at the full effective dosage because that increases the risk of unpleasant side effects and makes a person less likely to want to take the medication for the long term. Then again, many private hospitals feel tremendous pressure from insurance companies and therefore start off at a high "loading" dose. Depending upon the dosage of each of the medications that they started at, I would expect it would take anywhere between 7-14 days for the medications to really start taking effect and making dramatic changes. As you astutely pointed out, she probably doesn't have the manic energy anymore and that is most likely because of the immediate sedating effects of Zyprexa.

[Antmeister]

Good to know there is some improvement. You handled yourself fairly well sir.

[GrantDawg]

I've been reading and praying for you and your family, Todd. I just want to break in here and say I want to be EF27 when I grow up.

[BigDPW]

My mom is here, and she is very good at keeping me grounded. I'm playing FM a bunch and getting a few naps in. Housework is keeping me busy, too, which is a good thing for me. Thanks for checking in.


Todd,

I sent you a PM to give you my support... Not sure if it is any help or not but let's just say I have some sense of what you are going through!

A somewhat funny thing is during a similar event in my life/family, I also spent alot of time with FM (CM 00/01 I think to be exact). Needless to say my addictedness rating was quite high after that couple of weeks!

You will continue to be in my prayers Todd. I am glad you are beginning to see the light at the end of the tunnel now. Just keep taking good care of yourself so you can continue to be so helpful and supportive for your wife!

[BigDPW]

EF,

As a fellow physician (not psychiatry) I want to say that I am impressed and proud of the support that you have been offering Todd during this time. It is somewhat foreign to me to be "a physician" on this board but you have done an excellent job. I echo what GrantDawg says "I wanna be EF27 when I grow up!"

[MizzouRah]

awesome news! Thanks for sharing Todd.

Yes, thanks!

[Flasch186]

This board is family.

[Toddzilla]

This board is family.Quoted for truth.

[Toddzilla]

Dola - I've received a bunch of wonderful PMs the last few nights, and all of them have been very sincere, and kind, and have helped me a great deal. I'm sorry that I can't answer all of them, but those who have sent them, you know who you are, and I think you sincerely from the bottom of my heart.

[gkb]

I've been away from the board for awhile and I'm just now getting caught up. Toddzilla you and your family will be in our thoughts and prayers. I think you handled this extremely well and made some very tough, correct, decisions along the way. I can only hope that if I ever have to deal with anything along these same lines that I do as well as you did.

Eaglesfan27...dude, you are one valuable addition to these forums. I love this place.

[Schmidty]

I have Bipolar disorder. There, I said it. I think a few people on FOFC know, and a lot of you won't be suprised, but it's still tough to admit.

I have tried many different meds, and although it took me a couple of years to find the right one, I finally found it - Lamictal. The process of finding the right med was very frustrating and disheartening at times, but once I did, the knowledge that I could finally function in society at a semi-normal level, was unbelievably awesome.

Now, that doesn't mean that I don't have my tough moments and swings, but my swings are much less severe now. I also don't have any of the "psychotic" (I hate that word) episodes anymore.

By the way, I tried Zyprexa back in 2003, but I blew up to 220 pounds (I'm normally at 175-180), so my doctor took me off of it. I think it was working, but the wieght issue freaked me out.

Anyway, I hope and pray that everything goes well for your wife Todd. Hopefully she'll get the right meds right now, and not have to go through a long process of elimination. You guys are in my thoughts and prayers.

[kingfc22]

Hang in there Todd. Just know that you have a lot of people supporting you even if most of us have never even met in real life.

[Eaglesfan27]

This board is family.


Exactly. I'm a little bit uncomfortable with the praise, although I also appreciate it. However, I see people constantly helping each other on this board, moreso than any other message board I've ever been on. There are many people on this board, that I now feel a connection to and care about. I know that others on this board try to help each other within their areas of expertise, and I don't see what I'm doing as being any different or special.

[MIJB#19]

Just wanting to show my support here too.

Be supportive to your wife, Todd, stay optimistic, keep belief in that people can be helped over these kind of problems. It's probably going to be rough for some time, but you'll have to show her your support and I'm positive she'll come out well.

[st.cronin]

There is no doubt in my mind that there are happy days ahead for you and your wife. I hope that helps.

[Joker]

EF:

Do you have any idea how long it takes for the medications to bring a person "back to reality" for lack of a better term? I get the feeling she still believes all of the things she did before, she just doesn't have the manic energy anymore.

This from my friends experience.
1. The doctors have to find the correct balance of meds for the patient.
2. My friend went back and forth between normal and abnormal for about 6months.
-Im sorry thats all I've got but it does sound like the Doctor's are making improvements.

**I hope you have 1 specific Doctor on this that you can discuss these matters with rather than whoever happens to have the floor that day.

[Izulde]

The general rule of thumb on the medication thing is two weeks as a ballpark figure. I know, already been said, but I figure it wouldn't hurt to get additional confirmation. :)

Good to hear she's improving! Every little bit helps :)

[Toddzilla]

Another step forward today...

I had a meeting with my wife's case manager, her doctor, my wife, and me to discuss how my wife is doing and the treatment options going forward. My wife has been on her meds for a full 24 hours at this point, and she has calmed down considerably, but during the meeting she still insisted she was not sick, she was basically being held against her will, and she was being coerced to take her meds. I had a chance to explain in my own words why we brought her to the hospital on Tuesday and for the first time I think it began to sing in how scary her unpredictable behavior has been to myself and my daughter. While I wouldn't consider the meeting a smashing success, it was better than I had hoped. The doctor said many encouraging things about my wife's condition and her progress.

During visiting hours this evening, she was even better. Very calm and relaxed, and very aware of the initial effects of the meds she was taking - it was hard to focus quickly, she was slightly drowsy, and she seemed to understand when I told her that these side effects were only temporary while her body got used to them. For the most part, we sat and talked - about crafts, about our daughter, about some of the very nice artwork in the hallways. Basically we discussed everything except for why she was there and when she was leaving. We were both content to enjoy each other's company - the first time this has happened in weeks.

I'm beginning to feel that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. She's improving, and I can see it clearly. She's also beginning to really miss me and our daughter - something that was absent the last 3 days. I think as long as she begins to see that there is a means to what we are doing, and a positive outcome to all of this, she'll continue to improve.

I'm going to sleep pretty well tonight.

[Mota]

Another step forward today...

I'm going to sleep pretty well tonight.

You deserve it! Keep up the good work, I know that most of the work is in your wife's hands, but you're the one holding the family together. It's a hard road, but sounds like you're going in the right direction at least.

[DaddyTorgo]

Another step forward today...

I had a meeting with my wife's case manager, her doctor, my wife, and me to discuss how my wife is doing and the treatment options going forward. My wife has been on her meds for a full 24 hours at this point, and she has calmed down considerably, but during the meeting she still insisted she was not sick, she was basically being held against her will, and she was being coerced to take her meds. I had a chance to explain in my own words why we brought her to the hospital on Tuesday and for the first time I think it began to sing in how scary her unpredictable behavior has been to myself and my daughter. While I wouldn't consider the meeting a smashing success, it was better than I had hoped. The doctor said many encouraging things about my wife's condition and her progress.

During visiting hours this evening, she was even better. Very calm and relaxed, and very aware of the initial effects of the meds she was taking - it was hard to focus quickly, she was slightly drowsy, and she seemed to understand when I told her that these side effects were only temporary while her body got used to them. For the most part, we sat and talked - about crafts, about our daughter, about some of the very nice artwork in the hallways. Basically we discussed everything except for why she was there and when she was leaving. We were both content to enjoy each other's company - the first time this has happened in weeks.

I'm beginning to feel that there really is a light at the end of the tunnel. She's improving, and I can see it clearly. She's also beginning to really miss me and our daughter - something that was absent the last 3 days. I think as long as she begins to see that there is a means to what we are doing, and a positive outcome to all of this, she'll continue to improve.

I'm going to sleep pretty well tonight.

that is GREAT news todd. glad to see that you can already see the light at the end of the tunnel, and although your wife still believes that she isn't sick it seems like she was able to relax and actually be a little happy with you there today, which is great for her too.

sleep well, you deserve it.

[Eaglesfan27]

Great news. I hope you sleep well.

[BYU 14]

Great news Todd, glad things are looking up for you.

[terpkristin]

Fantastic news, Todd!!

Really glad to hear it, I hope things will continue to improve.

/tk

[Passacaglia]

Great news, good to hear!

[BigDPW]

I am delighted that you are able to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Doesn't mean I will stop praying for you though! ;)

[TroyF]

Great news Todd. I hope things continue to improve.

[WSUCougar]

Excellent news...hang in there, and keep us informed.

[MizzouRah]

Great to read the latest update Todd!

[vtbub]

Sounds like some serious steps in the right direction.

[Toddzilla]

Speaking with her last night and today, I'm beginning to see my "old" wife come back. She's getting very scared of her surroundings and the prolonged absence from home, and work, and family are making her sad. If anything, it shows that she sincerely doesn't want to be there, understands she is sick, and wants to get better. I'm allowing some of her friends from work and church to call and visit her, and that is making her happy. Unfortunately I can't bring our daughter for a visit - the min. age for visits is 16 - so I"m working on something - maybe a video or something.

Another day and another step forward.

[vtbub]

Good news, Todd. Hang in there!

[Eaglesfan27]

Speaking with her last night and today, I'm beginning to see my "old" wife come back. She's getting very scared of her surroundings and the prolonged absence from home, and work, and family are making her sad. If anything, it shows that she sincerely doesn't want to be there, understands she is sick, and wants to get better. I'm allowing some of her friends from work and church to call and visit her, and that is making her happy. Unfortunately I can't bring our daughter for a visit - the min. age for visits is 16 - so I"m working on something - maybe a video or something.

Another day and another step forward.


A video sounds like a great idea if she has a way to play it there. Glad to hear that she continues to make progress.

[MizzouRah]

Another great update Todd, you're handling this very well.

[King of New York]

You're a good man, Toddzilla.

You have had to deal with some heavy, heavy sh*t, but you have manged to keep it together for your family.

Your daughter is very lucky to have you for a dad.

[BYU 14]

You are a great Husband and Father Todd! I con't imagine the emotional Roller Coaster ride you have been on the last few days....awesome to hear some encouraging News!!

[Toddzilla]

Sigh.

Tonight wasn't a good night and a seeming step backwards - if only a step sideways. While my wife is still very much "down" from her mania, the irratibilty, irrationality, and confrontational-ness was out in full force tonight. (Married men, you think you know what I'm talking about? well, it's (that * PMS) ^ 3)). AS long as she hasn't regressed to the delusional / psychosis state she was in initially, I should consider that a good thing, but everything she wanted to talk about, if I didn't agree with the 100% or respond in a manner or tone that was suitable for her, she became extremely agitated. Sigh x 2.

What really made me sad, though, was her reaction to some videos of our daughter that I made for my wife on my cell phone. She watched them and didn't show even the slightest emotion. She didn't want to see them again, didn't ask me anything about them, just watched them, nodded her head semi-approvingly, and wanted to talk about something else. That right there, more than anything I've seen since Thursday, was more unlike my wife than I'd ever seen. I know, it's probably the drugs, but being there watching her (non)reaction was heartbreaking for me.

On another note, I'm going back to work tomorrow. I can telecommute, so I'm working from home tomorrow - with my mom staying with me, it unfortunately precludes me form the traditional work-at-home garb of boxers and a housecoat and fuzzy slippers. Getting back to doing IT things will do wonders for me I think, getting that part of my brain back in action and also doing something to put food on the table.

Gonna take a Unisom in about 10 minutes and fall asleep watching Virginia Tech wax Duke again on my DVR. :)

[Eaglesfan27]

I didn't want to talk about this too much in case it didn't happen, but inevitably it seems that there will be sidesteps or even small steps back in the treatment of a manic episode. It is something I used to warn the families of patients about all of the time when I was working on an inpatient unit. So, this isn't unusual and hopefully tomorrow will be a step forward again. I know it's hard but try to look at the whole trend of improvement rather than as a day to day thing. Anyway, sleep well and I'll continue to have you all in my prayers.

[Flasch186]

Im rooting for you but Im going to leave the professional analysis of that to EF.

Im so behind you though, and Im saying prayers for you.

[st.cronin]

I'm with Doc, I think something like this was very likely. I wouldn't worry too much.

[daveroswell]

I'm sorry to hear of your situation, and I hope things improve for your wife. Sounds like she has a severe case of bi-polar. I'm also bi-polar, but have a "less severe" case of it. Still, I'll be thinking of you and your family. I know it can be tough, but it can be gotten through with a lot of patience and willingness on your wife's part.

[Eaglesfan27]

Also, I want to commend you for how well you are handling this. Whether it was a public (state) or private hospital, I'd say 80-90% of my patients didn't have wives/husbands visiting every day or even every other day, presumably because they found it too hard to see their spouse in that condition. It takes a strong person to visit every day or even every other day and keep it together for their family.

[daveroswell]

Also, I want to commend you for how well you are handling this. Whether it was a public (state) or private hospital, I'd say 80-90% of my patients didn't have wives/husbands visiting every day or even every other day, presumably because they found it too hard to see their spouse in that condition. It takes a strong person to visit every day or even every other day and keep it together for their family.

This is very true. You are handling this very well IMO.

[JPhillips]

Hang in there. You should at least take comfort in the fact that you're doing your best to keep your family together. You should be proud that you've taken "for better or for worse" to heart.

[JonInMiddleGA]

What you described sounds a good bit like what's referred to as agitated depression. Probably my least favorite of all the various states I've experienced.

Sort of like being depressed & pissed off about being depressed & pissed off, which is depressing & pisses you off, which in turns pisses you off, which is depressing, which in turn ... or something like that.

Unlike manic or hypermanic phases, which can at least occasionally be accompanied by some incredible productivity, agitated depression is just a walk through hell AFAIC.

Please Todd, please know that I don't mean to diminish your misery by one micron here -- living with someone with bipolar disorder has to be damned near impossible to describe adequately & I commend you wholeheartedly for your approach thus far -- but I'd feel like I'd be really remiss if I didn't at least mention somewhere in this thread that it's also a pretty indescribable nightmarish hell for the person who has it too.

Amidst all the hell we cause for the people around us, it's easy for that to be either overlooked, diminished, or simply forgotten.

Prayers for your whole family.

[TroyF]

Todd,

It's going to be a rollercoaster. Stay on an even keel as best you can. My prayers are with you.

[Toddzilla]

I didn't want to talk about this too much in case it didn't happen, but inevitably it seems that there will be sidesteps or even small steps back in the treatment of a manic episode. It is something I used to warn the families of patients about all of the time when I was working on an inpatient unit. So, this isn't unusual and hopefully tomorrow will be a step forward again. I know it's hard but try to look at the whole trend of improvement rather than as a day to day thing. Anyway, sleep well and I'll continue to have you all in my prayers.ARGH - I thiught last night was bad, this morning was downright aggravating. My wife called me 5 times this morning between 7 and 8AM and when I finally answered she was in a jubilant mood. I was very excited for her and was assuming that she had "turned the corner" with regards to her medications. Unfortunately, she called to tell me she knows now why she is in the hospital - a higher power has called her and has brought her to the hospital to act as a "translator" for the other patients. She is supposed to work with the doctors and patients as an intermediary to get them all released.

EF: In a very generic non-specific way, does this sound like a patient who is experiencing the normal ebbs-and-flows of starting medication, or is it more similar to someone who is no longer taking them?

[condors]

sorry to hear about the downturn, just keep putting your best foot forward and hope for the best, keep your friends and family close

[Kodos]

This is such a tough situation for you and your family, Todd. Hang in there. I will echo others and say that you are doing a great job handling a tough situation.

[Eaglesfan27]

EF: In a very generic non-specific way, does this sound like a patient who is experiencing the normal ebbs-and-flows of starting medication, or is it more similar to someone who is no longer taking them?


Honestly, it could be either. I've seen patients that have gone through these normal ebbs-and-flows as they first started medications and I've seen people that "cheeked" the medication even when my best nurses were watching them. If I'm not mistaken 4 days should be coming up soon and they should be doing a "valproic acid level" blood test which should give a clear indication of whether or not she is actually taking the Depakote.

[Drake]

Sorry to hear that, Todd. If my wife's experience means anything, ebb-and-flow seems to be pretty normal. She has some pretty big mood swings whenever she steps up to a new dose, but I don't know if that's medication related or a psychological symptom of the step up.

My wife doesn't like being on medication, but she also knows that she needs to be, but it took her a long time to get there.

[Toddzilla]

Up down up down up down. Yeah I know.

I decided to mix things up a bit and I invited a few of my wife's friends to visit with me tonight. It turned out to be a bunch of fun. We sat in the dining room, watched TV and talked about nothing in particular. It was pretty fun. My wife wasn't aggravated, edgy, or annoyed in any way. She is still pretty jumpy, and her attention was all over the place, but this was by far the best mood she's been in the whole time. No doubt it was because of her friends, but I'll take it.

At the end of visiting when it was time for us to leave and the residents to have their last group meeting, one of the patients - a teenage girl committed by her parents - walked by us in her pajamas wrapped in her bedsheet. My wife introduced us and I told the girl "I really like your sheet." That actually got a big laugh out of my wife - the first one all week.

[wade moore]

Up down up down up down. Yeah I know.

I decided to mix things up a bit and I invited a few of my wife's friends to visit with me tonight. It turned out to be a bunch of fun. We sat in the dining room, watched TV and talked about nothing in particular. It was pretty fun. My wife wasn't aggravated, edgy, or annoyed in any way. She is still pretty jumpy, and her attention was all over the place, but this was by far the best mood she's been in the whole time. No doubt it was because of her friends, but I'll take it.

At the end of visiting when it was time for us to leave and the residents to have their last group meeting, one of the patients - a teenage girl committed by her parents - walked by us in her pajamas wrapped in her bedsheet. My wife introduced us and I told the girl "I really like your sheet." That actually got a big laugh out of my wife - the first one all week.

I will again say that I envy your courage and strength through this. I showed your initial thread to my fiance and proceeded to tell her I have no idea if I could do what you've done if it were her acting this way. She didn't seem to truely understand, but I know even now that it woudl be so hard for me.

not only did you follow through with it, you are now, imo, doing the even harder part - going through this every day and seemingly not letting her know how hard it is for you.

Anyway. The ups and downs are terrible I'm sure, but I have to imagine that in the ened you will each have even more appreciation for each other than it sounds like you already did.

[BYU 14]

These moments must be so encouraging for you......I know things can swing rapidly in these situations, but it is great to hear more positive news.

Your family remains in our prayers Todd.

[Antmeister]

Just hang in there sir. You have made some very intuitive decisions that may end up helping her in the end. I don't really have anything substantial to say, but I will continue to read this thread as if we are all in a bar and you are telling us of the joys and pitfalls of the day. So have a beer on me. Hell, order anything you want becaue I don't literally don't have to pay a dime.

[Toddzilla]

Just hang in there sir. You have made some very intuitive decisions that may end up helping her in the end. I don't really have anything substantial to say, but I will continue to read this thread as if we are all in a bar and you are telling us of the joys and pitfalls of the day. So have a beer on me. Hell, order anything you want becaue I don't literally don't have to pay a dime.I'll hafta check with EF to make sure I can have a few beers on top of my Xanax ;)

[BYU 14]

I'll hafta check with EF to make sure I can have a few beers on top of my Xanax ;)

Xanax = :D

[Eaglesfan27]

I'll hafta check with EF to make sure I can have a few beers on top of my Xanax ;)


No comment on that. ;)


Continue to stay strong and know that you have a lot of people pulling for you. :)

[SFL Cat]

Sorry I missed this Todd, thoughts and prayers are with you and yours.

[Drake]

Despite the tone of some of my earlier comments (*cough*I'm an idiot*cough*), the ups and downs get easier to handle over time. Lamictal has done wonders for my wife, who was a rapid cycler for most of the 13 years we've been married. Now she'll have really moody days (as in, she'll be really cranky one day, and then the fog lifts), and then several days where she's great. I don't mean normal, I mean *great*.

Once the treatment really takes hold, you start to see that a lot of the things that caused major irritations in your relationship (like slingshot moodiness) were really bipolar related, and you just didn't realize it. Knowing that makes some of the hard days easier to handle. When my wife goes funky now, I turn on the Xbox 360 for the kids, fire up FOF for myself and we just kind of clear out until the mood passes. Xanax also becomes a good sleeping aid (otherwise I tend to get a bit hypervigilant).

One of the important things to remember is that likely your wife isn't going to remember much of her manic episodes once they pass. Regardless of what she might say (and especially the things that don't seem like her), you've got to be able to let those things go, because when she's not manic, she won't feel that way. I have some (okay, A TON) of bitterness and resentment because of the way my wife's major manic episode manifested, but I realize that those are more my issues than hers. Lamictal has not only given me my wife back, but given me back a better version of her than I've had for more years than I can count.

I have faith that three or six months from now, you'll find that the same is true for you.

[Eaglesfan27]

Drake brings up an excellent point in that patients rarely remember much of what they said or did in a true manic episode.

[FrogMan]

Continue to stay strong and know that you have a lot of people pulling for you. :)

that is very true. I'm still reading even though I don't post much and I'm keeping you both in my thoughts. Hang in there.


FM

[Drake]

Heh. I developed a case of encephalitis in late 2002, and while I didn't have any long-term damage as a result, the first couple of months of 2003 are pretty hazy for me. Given that stress and sleep disruption are major predictors for manic episodes, you should see my wife and I trying to compare our recollections for that time period. :)

[Toddzilla]

Had a brief chat with the wife this morning. She sounds good. She had a long talk with her doctor's assistant, a lady she likes very much. They talked about her treatment and the assistant said they would be increasing her meds slightly and at this point, their main concern is to make sure the medications and the dosages are exactly where they want them to be prior to dismissal. My wife understood and agreed. Whodathunk?

[PilotMan]

Todd, I have been checked out of FOFC for a few days and can't believe what you are going through. The want to encourage you to stay strong through all the obstacles in front of you. You are facing an awful lot right now. You sir, have my prayers and you will be in my thoughts.

EF, my respect and admiration for you grows (including my envy that you work in the field that I studied in college, beats the hell out of flying for a living. At least for now.)

[Toddzilla]

So far so good - another good day. My wife is getting pretty disheartened as other patients with more severe issues have checked in since she's been there and are leaving before her. She's has 3 roommates. From my POV, it's pretty strange, too. Some of the people that have been released - from what I saw - are downright scary. I hope they don't live close by.

I've got another meeting with the docs and the case worker on Thursday, and it looks like they'll be recommending my wife come home either Friday or Monday.

I can hardly wait - the change in my wife the last 2 days has been unbelievable. To think that she's been battling bipolar disorder her whole life and is just now getting it taken care of is both sad and amazing.

[Eaglesfan27]

Glad to hear that she is continuing to take steps forward. :)

[Icy]

Great news Todd! and don't worry about your wife having to take medication for a long time or even her whole life, it's not that bad if it really helps her.

My wife had 3 epileptic crisis 6 years ago and since then she has been under treatment with Carbamazepina/tegretol first and now with Lamotrigina/Lamictal. If i tell you this is because both medicines are used for bipolar disorders too and maybe your wife will end having to take one of them or similar ones.

My wife has been under them for 6 years and probably will be her whole life, but she doesn't have any side effect, she has a 100% normal life without any limitation (even was able to get the driving license) and for sure we both feel good about her taking them to prevent any epileptic crisis that could happen otherwise.

[Toddzilla]

Ugh...just, ugh.

Tonight was awful. First, however the "good" news. We have another case meeting tomorrow at 10:30 to discuss my wife's release plans and outpatient care. The doctors apparently feel she is doing well enough to come home and start the 2-3 week outpatient program. They say she is reacting well to her medications and is ready to be released.

So, silly me, I figured tonight would be a great visit. I even asked my family not to come so we could be alone tonight. Well, tonight sucked. She was pissed off. Pissed off at the hospital, pissed off at her doctors, and mostly pissed off at me. I was accused, at various times tonight of


preventing her friends and family from calling and/or visiting,
prohibiting her father from visiting,
putting her in the hospital unnecessarily,
not being supportive of her needs,
not doing anything to help her get out, and
being the one with the actual problem and refusing to get help.

All of this before the meeting tomorrow where I'm going to be asked, point blank, do I feel my wife is ready to come home?

So I guess I need to suck it up and make the distinction between "do I feel she is healthy enough to come home?" and "do I want her to come home?". Because if the meeting were held tonight, I don't think I would have had any problem saying I wasn't sure coming home was such a great idea.

I know I made the right decision. I know it. I know it. But I just got the feeling that once she comes home, in a short period of time my concern is no longer going to be "do I feel this is a safe environment for me and my daughter?" but rather "do I feel this is a healthy environment for my daughter?"

I absolutely hate feeling this way, but I couldn't have gotten out of the hospital tonight fast enough, and a part of me really really hopes something happens between now and 10:30 tomorrow to really piss of the doctors so that the decision to keep her there a few extra days isn't in my hands.

[dawgfan]

Sorry to hear that Todd.

I'll defer to EF27, but I think you shouldn't be afraid to note her behavior from tonight's visit during tomorrow's meeting and express your concern about what the home situation with your daughter might be like if your wife has similar moody episodes blaming you once she's home. At the very least, if you don't want to bring up your concerns in front of your wife, express them to the doctors/psychiatrists separately and get their feedback on her behavior, and whether they expect that to continue.

I think your concerns are valid.

[MizzouRah]

What a rough time for you and your family, I really can't comprehend what you are going through and how you make it through each day Todd.

I pray for your wife each night. I'm sure you will make the right choice, whatever it might be.

[PilotMan]

^^^^^^^^
|||||||||||||

My sentiments exactly.

[Flasch186]

PAGING EF!!!!

Im so sorry Todd. I just cant grasp ths...it seems so unreal and yet youre living it. I admire your will and dedication sir, you are good man. stay strong.

[vtbub]

Hugs from here.

Hang in there.

[Antmeister]

Yeah, you are doing the right thing. Just keep holding up.

[Drake]

Todd,

Since bipolar disorder is a brain chemistry issue, try to frame your decision this way:

If your wife had diabetes and you had hospitalized her for that, would you feel comfortable having her released from inpatient medical care when her blood levels spiked the night prior to her release? Or would you rather, for her own safety, have her held over for another couple days of observation?

I know that it feels like crap being the one accused of having the problem when you know that you've been rational up to this point. Believe me, I've been there. I also know that when I had encephalitis, I was ready (in my own mind) to come home the morning after I came out of the coma. My wife intervened with the physicians and had me transferred to another facility for another week of observation and treatment. I resented the hell out of her at first, but it was the right decision at the time and I came to see that.

You're scared and concerned about the future. That's perfectly normal given your circumstance. If you need another few days to get your head around it -- and honestly, given your impression of this evening, I'd say that *she* needs another few days to stabilize -- I'd say that you shouldn't be afraid to tell the doctors so. Your wife isn't going to like hearing it tomorrow. She's going to feel betrayed. But you also don't want to risk bringing her home to a stressful environment and having her go manic again because she isn't as stable as she needs to be. You having the time to get your head right and feel comfortable about her coming home is important, because you're the one who's going to be primarily responsible for creating a safe environment for her. You need to be calm and secure in order to support her to the extent that she's going to need, especially in the early going.

So if you need another few days, ask for them. Don't try to be the strong guy who can handle it by suppressing your own fears and emotions. Admitting that you need more time is as much about protecting her health as it is yours at this point in time.

Hope that helps. I'm thinking about you.

D.

[digamma]

Thanks so much for keeping this updated, Todd. Still very much thinking of you.

[Izulde]

Just keep hanging in there, Todd.

And I echo the comment about not being afraid to mention tonight to the doctors in the morning.

[Godzilla Blitz]

Just bumped into this thread.

My thoughts are with you, Toddzilla. I'm hoping for the best.

[Eaglesfan27]

Sorry to hear that Todd.

I'll defer to EF27, but I think you shouldn't be afraid to note her behavior from tonight's visit during tomorrow's meeting and express your concern about what the home situation with your daughter might be like if your wife has similar moody episodes blaming you once she's home. At the very least, if you don't want to bring up your concerns in front of your wife, express them to the doctors/psychiatrists separately and get their feedback on her behavior, and whether they expect that to continue.

I think your concerns are valid.


I agree with Dawgfan. It may not make a difference in their decision, but I'd certainly let the psychiatrist(s) know your concerns in private if not in the meeting.

[Toddzilla]

Just went thru another ugly phone call this morning. My wife asked that I call her father so he can come up and take pert in the family meeting - you know, the father who said he didn't want to have anything to do with my wife until she was better? She said she no longer trust me to make the right decision concerning her best interests.

And I guess she may be right, because the only agenda I have is to take care of my daughter's best interests, and it doesn't look like they intersect with my wife's anymore.

It is going to be an ugly meeting today. I'll keep you posted.

Anyone know a good family lawyer?

[Subby]

Hang in there, TZ...

(My pm offer still stands.)

[Eaglesfan27]

I wonder why she didn't call her father, herself. I've seen how tough these meetings can be, and I wish you nothing but the best through this very difficult time.

[Radii]

Good luck. I've been following all along and wish you the best, stay strong. I hope things go as smoothly as possible today.

[vtbub]

Stay strong

[Flasch186]

Things will get better, Todd. Keep your chin up and stay strong.

[NYFAN]

I've been reading these posts daily, you have my best wishes during this time of need. Hope the meeting goes as well as possible.

[King of New York]

TZ,

Oh, man.

You are right, though. You've got to do what is in the immediate best interests of your daughter. And what you are doing is, ultimately, in the best interests of your wife as well, even if her current condition does not allow her to see it that way.

Undoubtedly it hurts like hell to have your wife claim that you are the one to blame for everything, but you have got to take the blows and keep on making those good decisions.

Peace.

[Mizzou B-ball fan]

Undoubtedly it hurts like hell to have your wife claim that you are the one to blame for everything, but you have got to take the blows and keep on making those good decisions.

Peace.

Agreed. It's tough right now to not personalize her actions. Just understand that she's very sick right now and needs a lot of help. If she were of sane mind right now, she'd be able to thank you for your efforts because that's exactly what she would do. It's just really hard to see that right now.

[KevinNU7]

Undoubtedly it hurts like hell to have your wife claim that you are the one to blame for everything
Sounds like things are getting back to normal.

Sorry Todd, it was just to easy to pass up. Trust your instincts, you are doing the right thing.

[dawgfan]

And I guess she may be right, because the only agenda I have is to take care of my daughter's best interests, and it doesn't look like they intersect with my wife's anymore.
They do intersect with your wife's best interests - she's just not in a condition where she can recognize that right now.

You're doing everything right Todd. I know this situation is unbelievably difficult for you, but you're handling things the right way and you have the correct priorities. Everyone is pulling for you and wishing you the best.

[dawgfan]

I agree with Dawgfan. It may not make a difference in their decision, but I'd certainly let the psychiatrist(s) know your concerns in private if not in the meeting.
Good to know my Psychology degree wasn't a complete waste... :)

[Mac Howard]

I've been following the thread with a mixture of sympathy and horror at what you're going through TZ. Also surprised at how many others have similar experiences. I haven't previously posted so, in the light of the doubts you seem to be having, just want to say that I believe you've handled this incredibly well and your priorities have always been the right ones. That goes for your current decision: your daughter has to be the first concern and you can't let your wife's irrational criticisms deflect you. When she's stable again I think you'll find she'll appreciate what you're doing.

[Toddzilla]

And it is official - almost. At the family meeting today, the doctors and we decided that my wife will be discharged tomorrow, pending a good blood test. I have very mixed feeling about it, but I think it will be nice to get back to something closer to "normal" that we've had at home for a while now.

I feel selfish a little, but I've really enjoyed the time I've been able to spend with my family and my daughter without the "interference" my wife was. I liked being able to sleep late with my daughter, being able to play with her without worrying about what time it was, being able to put her to bed every night, being able to play FM until 2 AM (ok, I only did that once, and I paid for it the next day, but worth it). I know my wife needs to be home, and she needs to see her daughter, and my daughter needs to see her mom. But I guess I shouldn't feel bad for having a good time with the time I had.

It is still very clear to everyone, including the doctors, that my wife doesn't feel she was ever really that sick and doesn't believe any of this was really necessary. Something I didn't realize was that - while hospitalized - they get no real therapy. None. They do arts and crafts and have group meeting to discuss issues, but the real therapy will start on Monday. I guess that is why I haven't seen a change in attitude or acceptance. I'm assured by my friends and family members with experience that once my wife starts her daily outpatient program on Monday - every day from 9 to 3 - she will be getting very intensive therapy, the kind she needs to begin to address the problems that led her to the hospital in the first place. That, plus the medication, plus a psychiatrist, plus ongoing therapy for her, and for me, and for us, should generate a positive outcome. As you can guess by now, I don't quite see the positive outcome out there, but I'm going to be positive and supportive and do what it takes to get there.

This thread has been very therapeutic for me. Much like my blog for Cassandra (http://www.40akers.com - the link is there), typing out my thoughts and feelings has forced me to deal with them in a very real fashion. I liked this forum a little better than the blog, because I got immediate supportive positive feedback from a group of peers I like, I trust, and I care about. Self-selected therapy! Having some real experts with serious knowledge helped immeasurably.

So what now? I guess after tomorrow, when my wife comes home, I begin a new thread - perhaps in the dynasty section - about what's happening post hospitalization. I'll still need to emote via my keyboard, and I'll *really* need the thoughts, prayers, advice, and support from you guys.

I stopped being amazed at how supportive a group of people I've never "met" could be in a crisis after my daughter died and TotalFark picked me up and helped carry me through (this was in my FOFC lurking days). Last April on the anniversary of Cassie's death, it was FOFC that held out a hand to pull me off the ground. You guys did it again this time, and while I try not to be amazed that it can happen, I guess I really am. I can't thank every one enough.

I just hope this story has a happy ending.

[st.cronin]

Dynasty! Excellent idea. I'll be following along, with abundant optimism.

[Buccaneer]

I liked this forum a little better than the blog, because I got immediate supportive positive feedback from a group of peers I like, I trust, and I care about.

Imagine that.

Keep up the good work and admirably strength, Todd.

[KWhit]

I'm glad to hear that the forum has been an area of support for you. And it's great that she is ready to come home.

There will still be ups and downs (probably plenty of downs), but keep a positive outlook as much as you can. Things will improve. You'll get your wife back. Keep telling yourself that and be as patient as you can.

Good luck to you Todd.

[Eaglesfan27]

I'm glad that this thread has been helpful. I've debated on mentioning this, but I think the pros outweigh the cons: It is not uncommon for people who have their first manic episode to take several months and often a 2nd or 3rd hospitilization to really becoming committed to taking the medications. I tell you this to warn you that you'll need to stay on top of her to take her medications. I also tell you this so that you'll know it's not your fault if your wife has a setback in the future. Of course, that is just an average statistic and some people don't fall into that pattern. I pray that your wife is one who stays on her medications and doesn't have another episode for your family's sake. However, I sincerely and firmly believe that with time, medications can do wonders for people with Bipolar and that with persistence you will have your wife back in the future. I'll be following any threads you choose to post and wish you all the best.

[KevinNU7]

So is there a dynasty now?

[Toddzilla]

Yeah - Real Life: Toddzilla's wife comes home (http://www.operationsports.com/fofc/showthread.php?t=56053)

[k0ruptr]

sorry I havent posted sooner, but I just wasn't sure what to say...I have been following this thread every day though.


Anyway, I really hope she continues to get better and everything works out for the best Todd. Gl and best wishes to your family.

[kingnebwsu]

Yeah man, best of luck with the real life "dynasty" (though gaming dynasties are much less stressful ;)).

We'll be keeping you in our thoughts. Good luck to you and your family.

[Toddzilla]

Well, here we go again.

It doesn't really matter how close you are to someone, how carefully you watch them, or how much you trust or love them, shit happens.

Seems my wife stopped taking her medication a few weeks ago and she spiraled out of control to the point I had to petition the court for a temporary detention order for psychiatric evaluation.

Unlike last time, where the process was amicable, she's been fighting me every step. I've got hearings to attend, paperwork to fill out, its a goddamned nightmare.

sigh

[DaddyTorgo]

Oh fuck.

Sorry Todd. Guess this explains your recent FB postings.

You're a saint - hang in there.

[DaddyTorgo]

I'm glad that this thread has been helpful. I've debated on mentioning this, but I think the pros outweigh the cons: It is not uncommon for people who have their first manic episode to take several months and often a 2nd or 3rd hospitilization to really becoming committed to taking the medications. I tell you this to warn you that you'll need to stay on top of her to take her medications. I also tell you this so that you'll know it's not your fault if your wife has a setback in the future. Of course, that is just an average statistic and some people don't fall into that pattern. I pray that your wife is one who stays on her medications and doesn't have another episode for your family's sake. However, I sincerely and firmly believe that with time, medications can do wonders for people with Bipolar and that with persistence you will have your wife back in the future. I'll be following any threads you choose to post and wish you all the best.

just bumping this post from EF 3 years ago up so that you continue to realize that it's not your fault she had a setback Todd, and this is somewhat "expected."

[FrogMan]

hang in there Todd. Thinking about you, sending you good vibes. Not much, but hopefully it'll help in some way. Best of luck!

FM

[Ksyrup]

Good luck. I have to say, of all the time I've spent on forums on the internet in the past 15 years or so, this is one of the most haunting true stories anyone's ever posted. It has stuck with me - that something so unexpected and terrible and life-changing could happen as a result of something that was completely unavoidable. I hope you continue to have the strength to deal with these issues.

[Antmeister]

Wow....sorry to hear this. As you may already know, my wife is going through something similar with her father. Keeping you guys in our thoughts as usual and hope you able to remain steady through this.

[Mizzou B-ball fan]

Good luck Todd. Sorry you have to go to battle again.

[chesapeake]

Very sorry to see this, Todd. Good luck and be strong.

[King of New York]

Very sorry to hear that things have taken a turn for the worse, TZ. Best of luck to you and your family in the difficult weeks to come.

[Lathum]

ugh, stay strong man.

[cubboyroy1826]

Wow sorry to hear this Todd. I hope things get better for you. Hang in there. If you need to talk to get your mind off of things shoot me a PM.

[Draft Dodger]

sorry Todd. Sounds like this has been a long, difficult journey.

[Dodgerchick]

Oh Todd, so sorry. You know where I'm at, if you need anything. Eerily similar with what my mom's going through.

[JediKooter]

Dang. I'm sorry this happening again. Good luck and I hope everything works out.

[terpkristin]

Oh crap, Todd. Sorry to hear this, if you need anything, let me know, I'm pseudo-local.

/tk

[Drake]

Sorry you're going through this again, Todd. :(

[Greyroofoo]

I spent a couple months in an psych ward, it's not so bad.