No Cure For Cancer

[Kodos]

Ha. That Denis Leary album is pretty funny, ain't it? "I'm an asshole, yo-yo, yo-yooooo!"

[Wolfpack]

You know what I'm gonna do? I'm gonna get a 1967 Cadillac El Dorado convertible! Hot pink! With whaleskin hubcaps and all-leather cow interior and big brown baby seal eyes for headlights! Yeah! And I'm going to drive around in that baby at a hundred miles an hour getting one mile per gallon, sucking down quarter-pounder cheeseburgers from McDonald's in those old-fashioned, non-biodegradable styrofoam containers, and when I'm done sucking down those greaseball burgers, I'm gonna wipe my mouth with the American flag and toss those containers right outside and there ain't a goddamned thing anyone can do about it! You know why? Because we've got the bombs, that's why! Two words: nuclear-f*ing-weapons, okay! Russia, Germany, Romania, they can have all the democracy they want! They can have a big democracy cakewalk right through the middle of Tiananmen Square and it won't make a lick of difference because we've got the bombs, okay?! John Wayne's not dead! He's frozen! And as soon as we find the cure for cancer, we're going to thaw out The Duke and he's gonna be pretty pissed off. You know why? Have you ever taken a cold shower? Well multiply that by about 15 million times and that's how pissed off The Duke's gonna be. I'm gonna get The Duke and John Cassavetes--Hey!--and Lee Marvin--Hey!--and Sam Peckinpah--Hey!-- and a case of whiskey and drive down to Texas--Hey! You know you really are an asshole! Why don't you just shut up and sing the song, pal?

[Oilers9911]

Imagine a guy with a voicebox pulling up to the drive-thru window at McDonalds.

[Ryche]

Greatest comedy bit ever.

[Franklinnoble]

I guess it had to happen... not like the board was around in 1992 to discuss this album when it first came out...

[Kodos]

Might have been in response to this:

http://www.operationsports.com/fofc/showthread.php?t=56837

[Craptacular]

I love that f*%^in' Q.

[amdaily]

i've only seen denis is Rescue Me, and in that context, he is the greaest comedian of our time!

[Critch]

Denis Leary hasn't been as funny since Bill Hicks died.