Neighborhood Kids Death Wish....Or to crap on my lawn.

[MacroGuru]

Alright,

What to do, I just caught the 7 year old neighborhood kid taking a crap in my yard, right next to my Central Air unit....

Now, I literaly scared the shit out of the kid as he ran back home pulling up his pants...

These kids run rampant, parents sleep all day, mom works at night, dad I don't know where he is, but these kids run around unchecked all day.

Question is...what do I do? Neighbors have gone to the parents and told them to watch their kids as they have done things to their homes too...

Do I go and tell the mother? Hoping it doesn't fall on deaf ears?

[Lathum]

Have the cops pay the kids a visit, that will probably scare them straight

[st.cronin]

Rub his nose in it.

[Karlifornia]

I think we all know there is only one option here:

Direct reciprocation.

[Poli]

I think I agree with Karl. Drop a deuce in the kid's backpack.

[JPhillips]

Sounds like you could bury him alive and nobody would notice.

[Crim]

REPARATIONS!!!

[Crim]

By the way, it's nice that MG has returned, to regale us with tales of eardrum scabs and lawnshitting. Welcome back.

[cartman]

Look on the bright side:

It's better than his name written in pee in the snow.
In your daughter's handwriting.

:D

[Schmidty]

In other news, I hate people's signatures that contain a quote box. It's fucking irritating.

[Cringer]

Get a slingshot or a pellet gun, then break out the camo and wait.

[FrogMan]

Rub his nose in it.

that's what I'd do...

FM

[Maple Leafs]

What to do, I just caught the 7 year old neighborhood kid taking a crap in my yard, right next to my Central Air unit....

This kid is going to grow up to be an excellent internet forum poster.

[bulletsponge]

lol, just pick up the shit with a shovel and chunk it at him

[stevew]

In other news, I hate people's signatures that contain a quote box. It's fucking irritating.

I agree with you strongly.

Now trade me gully for table scraps.

[Schmidty]

I agree with you strongly.

Now trade me gully for table scraps.

Gully for Ryan. Straight up.

[stevew]

Gully for Ryan. Straight up.

Both of those guys suck this year, and our tanking our respective teams.....at least Gully's putting up a proper OPS.

[MacroGuru]

By the way, it's nice that MG has returned, to regale us with tales of eardrum scabs and lawnshitting. Welcome back.

Hey, just need to throw a few curveballs out there....I will get back to being annoying about how shitty the Lions are this year, ranting and raving about BYU football, and anything else I can find! :D :p

[CamEdwards]

7 years old? That's fucking ridiculous. Talk to the parents, and tell them that if they don't get their shit together (no pun intended) and police their kids, you will be calling the cops.

Not only is it the best thing for your lawn, it's the best thing for those kids.

[thealmighty]

Put it in a lunch bag.
Put it on the kids' front porch.
Set the bag on fire.
Ring the doorbell.
Run.

(and if you have a video camera, set it up first, then put the vid on youtube with his name.)

[Izulde]

Any chance he could be doing you a favor and actually fertilizing your lawn?

[Desmond]

As someone else suggested, pick it up with a shovel, put on their front step with a little note telling dear old mom that her son left this at your house.

[Ragone]

pick it up with a shovel. put it in a mailbox sized box.. stuff it in their mailbox with that note about who did it

[MrBigglesworth]

This calls for an upper decking.

[Kodos]

That's just a Babe Ruth bar!

[Surtt]

7 years old? That's fucking ridiculous. Talk to the parents, and tell them that if they don't get their shit together (no pun intended) and police their kids, you will be calling the cops.

Not only is it the best thing for your lawn, it's the best thing for those kids.

I think I would call the cops (or maybe social services.)
That kid has problems.

[MizzouRah]

Rub his nose in it.

claps hands, bravo!

[rkmsuf]

Trick or treat will be your tour de force.

[Ksyrup]

Too much crap talk outside the Stalls thread. Let's consolidate our shit, people!

[Desnudo]

In other news, I hate people's signatures that contain a quote box. It's fucking irritating.

Must be a slow news day

[MikeVic]

Maybe he ate something that upset his stomach, and there was no way for him to hold it in? So he just went somewhere he thought was not very easily seen?

[JediKooter]

Get a horse and have the horse start shitting in your neighbors yard. Or try and video tape the kid doing his impression of Tyrone Biggums and mail a copy of it to his parents saying that the other copy is going to the cops if you don't curb your kids' scatological practices in your lawn.

[rkmsuf]

yeah, get a horse. this is so obvious.

[Fidatelo]

If movies and television have taught me anything, you need to escalate this. I propose ejaculating on their front door.

[Anthony]

start small. go with putting feces in their mailbox and attach a note that says "i believe this belongs to your son". that's something i would likely wind up doing. actually i would probably go easy and just ring their doorbell and tell his parents. maybe a little "i'm sure you'll discipline your child, because if it happens again i'll go to the authorities" just to sweeten the pot. kids will be kids, but respect is something that needs to be taught.

[Logan]

Was it a curly-haired geek going by the name of Ronald Miller?

"YOU SHIT ON MY HOUSE!!!!

(sobbing) You shit on my house."

[stevew]

I didn't realize your neighbor was Najeh Davenport. Inappropriate shitting must be a family trait.

[MacroGuru]

Well, I have approached the parents, and informed them of what happened, I haven't seen the kid outside since...I hope he is still alive, but they were appalled their son had done that.

[JediKooter]

they were appalled their son had done that.

Glad to hear they didn't have a crappy attitude towards you about it.

[MrBigglesworth]

Well, I have approached the parents, and informed them of what happened, I haven't seen the kid outside since...I hope he is still alive, but they were appalled their son had done that.
It's a shame you had to dump that on them.

[Crim]

Bet they felt like shit.

[AZSpeechCoach]

The kid is probably just pooped.




No? Didn't work? Sorry.

[heybrad]

Was it a curly-haired geek going by the name of Ronald Miller?

"YOU SHIT ON MY HOUSE!!!!

(sobbing) You shit on my house."
Something stinks in suburbia!

[TonyR]

Well, I have approached the parents, and informed them of what happened, I haven't seen the kid outside since...I hope he is still alive, but they were appalled their son had done that.

Well, at least it seems like the parents cared enough to correct the kid's bad behavior.