Does this qualify as a date?

[Izulde]

Say you have a guy who asks a girl "I was wondering, did you want to have dinner sometime?" and girl says, "Dinner? Sure. When?" to which guy replies, "Whenever.... do you have my email or phone?"...

Leading to girl saying "No... Let me give you my email address" and she does, then says as guy and girl go their separate ways, "But yeah, e-mail me"...

Is this a date or is it a casual dinner?

Assume both people involved are American, but in Europe for a few months (in case that's a factor to weigh).

[sabotai]

It's a date.

[Maple Leafs]

It's a date.

[MikeVic]

I'd say a casual dinner?

edit: I'm a moran I guess.

[path12]

Depends. Did you ever set up a date or just exchange contact information?

[path12]

Dola, I believe date.

[MikeVic]

Depends. Did you ever set up a date or just exchange contact information?

That was my thinking... no actual "date" was set... so how can it be called a date yet. :)

[Izulde]

Depends. Did you ever set up a date or just exchange contact information?

Dinner going established. The precise when and where is yet to be determined, though.

[Galaxy]

Reminds me of this thread:

http://www.operationsports.com/fofc/showthread.php?t=42004&highlight=Outback+Steakhouse

[oliegirl]

In girl world, it's a date. If a guy asks a girl to dinner, and they don't already have a friendship relationship, it's definitely a date.

[ISiddiqui]

Depends. Are the two friends or what? If friends, it may just be a casual dinner. If don't really know each other that well, then probably more a date.

[Lathum]

Date

[miked]

If she goes back to your place to fuck, it was a date.

[Radii]

w/ the information provided, i'm going w/ date.

[Neon_Chaos]

So, who'd you ask?

:)

[Izulde]

Depends. Are the two friends or what? If friends, it may just be a casual dinner. If don't really know each other that well, then probably more a date.

Say they're acquaintances... which would probably fall more in the latter category, I presume.

[Izulde]

So, who'd you ask?

:)

I knew the hypothesis wasn't going to hold up for long. :D

This girl from my intensive language course that ended a week ago.

[ISiddiqui]

Acquaintances probably falls more into date mode. With friends, that can be a casual dinner. Not sure if that's the case with acquaintances.

[oliegirl]

So basically, Izulde asked a girl to dinner and now is unsure if it's a date or not. If you like her and would be interested in dating her, consider it a date and pay for dinner. If not, go to dinner and if she offers to pay, accept the offer. If she doesn't, she definitely considers it a date and let her down easy.

[ISiddiqui]

In modern times, men shouldn't be expected to pay for dinner on a date :p.

[larrymcg421]

It's a date, so yes you have to change your sheets.

[rkmsuf]

what are you an idiot?

[Celeval]

Borderline between the two. A second dinner together afterwards would definately be considered a date.

[Izulde]

So basically, Izulde asked a girl to dinner and now is unsure if it's a date or not. If you like her and would be interested in dating her, consider it a date and pay for dinner. If not, go to dinner and if she offers to pay, accept the offer. If she doesn't, she definitely considers it a date and let her down easy.

This is most likely the route I'll take, thanks :)

It just threw me for a minute because it's close to 10 years to the day to the last time I scheduled an outing that could be construed as a date.

[Raiders Army]

If the email address ended in @hotmail or @yahoo, I'd say no.

[Izulde]

If the email address ended in @hotmail or @yahoo, I'd say no.

Nope, none of the main providers like that.

[rkmsuf]

This is most likely the route I'll take, thanks :)

It just threw me for a minute because it's close to 10 years to the day to the last time I scheduled an outing that could be construed as a date.

wtf? do you want it to be a date? if so just pay. don't wait for her to offer to pay you dork. if that's what you are going to do just get a salad and get it over with.

[path12]

I agree. Take charge and pay the check.

[Klinglerware]

Not yet a date. You have to follow up and suggest a time and place. If she is still interested at that point, it can probably be construed as a date. Of course, there is a certain element of ambiguity in this situation, but when is that ever not the case?

[rkmsuf]

Not yet a date. You have to follow up and suggest a time and place. If she is still interested at that point, it can probably be construed as a date. Of course, there is a certain element of ambiguity in this situation, but when is that ever not the case?

Isn't the point that if this was to ever actually occur, would it be a date?

[Neon_Chaos]

Cheap bastard. :P

[Lorena]

31 posts in and no picsplskthx?

U guys are majorly slipping.

[Klinglerware]

Isn't the point that if this was to ever actually occur, would it be a date?

Not clear from the original post. The whole e-mail exchange with no actual plans set did seem a little ambiguous... some potential for blowoff wiggle room, and not in a good way.

[RedKingGold]

Is she a cannibal?

[finketr]

Reminds me of this thread:

http://www.operationsports.com/fofc/showthread.php?t=42004&highlight=Outback+Steakhouse


that was a nice walk down memory lane..

EF27 in NO before Katrina.

[dawgfan]

OK, so it's been a long time since you went on a date, but can I just say that if you want to have more dates that you be a lot more direct. For example, you started off fine:

"I was wondering, did you want to have dinner sometime?"

And she replied positively:

"Dinner? Sure. When?"

But your follow-up was waaaay too wishy-washy:

"Whenever.... do you have my email or phone?"

Two things -

1) If you're going to ask a girl out on a date (as opposed to it being purely platonic) have the details already figured out - have a specific day in mind. By saying "Whenever", it can come across as though you are only moderately interested and haven't really made a big effort to think about the details. Having a specific day in mind makes you seem more decisive and confident. It doesn't really matter if she's available on that day or not - you can always ask about a different day - because it's all about projecting confidence.

2) Always always always ask her for her phone number - don't leave it up to her to contact you.

Fortunately for you, she appears to be quite interested, because she picked up the ball where you were fumbling it. But you can't count on that most of the time.

[Young Drachma]

Plus, it's important to sound busy, even if you're not. Not in a "I'll check my calendar" sort of way, but in a "I have stuff to do and my schedule isn't so open that you can just call me when you decide you're bored."

But seems she's interested enough that you didn't have to worry. So don't think too much. Just actual natural. Or I dunno, something like that. Trying too hard usually doesn't go too well.

[Fidatelo]

OK, so it's been a long time since you went on a date, but can I just say that if you want to have more dates that you be a lot more direct. For example, you started off fine:

"I was wondering, did you want to have dinner sometime?"

And she replied positively:

"Dinner? Sure. When?"

But your follow-up was waaaay too wishy-washy:

"Whenever.... do you have my email or phone?"

Two things -

1) If you're going to ask a girl out on a date (as opposed to it being purely platonic) have the details already figured out - have a specific day in mind. By saying "Whenever", it can come across as though you are only moderately interested and haven't really made a big effort to think about the details. Having a specific day in mind makes you seem more decisive and confident. It doesn't really matter if she's available on that day or not - you can always ask about a different day - because it's all about projecting confidence.

2) Always always always ask her for her phone number - don't leave it up to her to contact you.

Fortunately for you, she appears to be quite interested, because she picked up the ball where you were fumbling it. But you can't count on that most of the time.

This is a solid post.

[dawgfan]

Yep. Assuming the date actually gets scheduled, Izulde should feel pretty confident going in because she's responded quite positively (so far). Don't put on an act, just recognize that she seems interested and let that feed your confidence level.

[rkmsuf]

If she asks you to come upstairs for coffee, go.

[MikeVic]

If she asks you to come upstairs for coffee, go.

But what if you don't want to drink coffee so late?

[rkmsuf]

But what if you don't want to drink coffee so late?

he doesn't have to. especially if her boyfriend is there.

[MikeVic]

he doesn't have to. especially if her boyfriend is there.

I got nothing.

[saldana]

I'd say a casual dinner?

edit: I'm a moran I guess.

this is funny on so many levels

also, its a date.

[Eaglesfan27]

that was a nice walk down memory lane..

EF27 in NO before Katrina.

Heh. I just figured out why the other thread was bumped.

Well, I'd definitely say this was a date ;)

[CU Tiger]

Ask her if you should bring a rubber, if she says yes its a date!


BTW you should also try to gain access to her email and schedule something there....

[st.cronin]

Whether its an official date or not makes no difference, what matters is whether you both want to get jiggy with it.

[CamEdwards]

I'd actually say that based on the way Izulde asked her out, chances are pretty good that she doesn't consider this a date. Apparently I'm in the minority on this, but I'd do what I can to make sure she knows you consider this an actual date, and not just two people from class going to get dinner one night.

[JediKooter]

I'd spritz up with some of that home made cologne you've been working on too. Chicks dig that.

[Raiders Army]

Tell her about your fantasy about two chicks at once. If she agrees, then it's definitely a date.

[DeToxRox]

Not a date. You shouldn't ask a girl if she has your number or e-mail because it makes you seem like it's just dinner with a friend. You need to ask for her number to at least give her more of an impression it's supposed to be a date.

[Logan]

I side with the non-daters. Doesn't mean it has to end as a non-date. Just be more direct when you guys get in touch, ie when you email her say something like "can I take you to dinner tomorrow night?"

Better yet, email her for her number.

[ISiddiqui]

Thinking back on it, the "Whatever" may make her think its a non date. Initially when you asked her for dinner, she may have thought it was date like, but then when you said whatever for when you wanted to do something, she probably thought, oh he just wants to be friends.

[Desmond]

Make reservations somewhere, call her up and tell her when and where, and then say "cool, it's a date.", reply back with her response.

[st.cronin]

I agree that it may be a non-date, but that doesn't mean she's not going to be wearing his best underwear.

[ISiddiqui]

If she's already wearing his best underwear, does he need to go on the date at all? ;)

[st.cronin]

Wow, that was an awesome typo.

[ThunderingHERD]

Not a date. No one would assume that exchange was a date proposition unless they really really wanted it to be. Seriously, who doesn't regularly have similar exchanges with completely platonic friends/acquaintances? The fact that you are both in a foreign country doesn't really weigh on the date/not-a-date issue (evidence of a date is already at zero), although it does, obviously, raise the probability that she wouldn't care even to be acquainted with you otherwise.

[korme]

If she goes back to your place to fuck, it was a date.

That my friend is up for debate!

[Karlifornia]

You need Jim harbaugh on your side. You need to approach a girl you like the same way Coach Harbaugh approaches a football game. You say "Hey, let's go out". She says "Email me". You say "I'll email you". You email her with an email that says "I'm gonna do one push up for every time that we bone." You do the push-ups, and as you do the push-ups, you count "1!! and 2!!! and 396!!! And one more for the National Championship!"

And then when you take her back to your hostel or wherever you're staying at, you flex, kiss each bicep, and bark in her face "MY HOUSE, MY CREAM, OUR DREAM!".

[Icy]

As you didn't know each other before, i would call it a date, it's not just two friends having dinner.

[Izulde]

Thanks guys and gals. :) I e-mailed a bit ago, so we'll see how it goes there then.

[rkmsuf]

Thanks guys and gals. :) I e-mailed a bit ago, so we'll see how it goes there then.

any chance you could post a copy of it here?

[lordscarlet]

any chance you could post a copy of it here?

Any chance you could setup a date over the phone instead of email? :)

[Marc Vaughan]

Its a date (god I'm really really happy I'm married and don't have to do that now :D)

[rkmsuf]

Any chance you could setup a date over the phone instead of email? :)

maybe they plan to sit a separate tables and text each other during the meal

[MikeVic]

maybe they plan to sit a separate tables and text each other during the meal

That would be cool.

[FrogMan]

(god I'm really really happy I'm married and don't have to do that now :D)

+1

:D :D

FM

[Coffee Warlord]

Also, if she's not wearing any underwear, it's probably a date.

[Desnudo]

couldna but didna

[JediKooter]

Does she have a sister?

[Desmond]

Does she have a mother?

[rkmsuf]

Does she have a penis?

[Desmond]

Does he have a penis?

[MikeVic]

Does she have a brother? Err I mean dog? Err I mean twin?

[ThunderingHERD]

Does she have a self-esteem problem?