Damn These Looks Of Mine

[TCY Junkie]

I look really young, like 20 or younger. I have been going to the this grocery store for the last two months and this girl that works there just will not stop checking me out. She gives me change with her hands cupped and then runs her fingers down my hand. Then one time she was bagging and I had five cases of water and I put one up there and she came over and told me they could just scan it with a tag they had and put my water back in my buggy for me. Well I caught her starring at my butt, I don't really blame her. I lost some weight and even my barber told me my pants where baggy around my butt, so I changed and man the women will not stop looking. I took my sister with me to get the jeans. The next day my sister-in-law comes over and after I leave comments about my butt to my sister. What is so fascinating about it, I can't really get a good view of it even though I've tried numerous times.

Back on topic I thought this girl was 19 or 20 but yesterday I went in there and she told the old man in front of me she was home schooled. Know I'm guessing she is 17. I'm kinda a different and can't get her out of my mind because her smile just draws me in like a fat guy to the buffet on steak night.

Another problem I had was today at Fuddruckers. I go in there in see this attractive girl, guessing she's 20. I make I contact with her and then look up to see what I want for sure. Maybe two seconds past and I proceed to her lane and then a guy about 20 said "I can take care of you over here". Seriously I heard the girl gasp. I was right in front of her and then I wasn't. After I went over to hm I was wondering why I did(no gay comments). Why would he be so eager to take my order. I guess gays really are more aggressive. Then when I was leaving I thought I would look at her one more time and guess what happened. He was waving at me like a just gave him the best sexual fantasy of his life and told me to come back soon.

Basically I attract the young and been told I was queerbait when I was younger and appearantly its true. Damn these looks of mine.

[spleen1015]

You're a legend in your own mind.

[Zelig]

Horns???

[Suburban Rhythm]

Your barber checked out your ass?

[TCY Junkie]

Your barber checked out your ass?
He said my butt looked baggy, thats when I had to update the jeans.

[vex]

ok

[Suburban Rhythm]

He said my butt looked baggy, thats when I had to update the jeans.

A simple 'yes' would have been enough.

[Lathum]

I can assure you that would be my last trip to that barber

[TCY Junkie]

I'm being serious, except for the catching the girl check my butt out(she really grabbed the water in front of me and smiled and said something, as she approached me, her eyes distracted me the way she was looking at me.) and that guy really seemed too happy and eager at fuddruckers. And freaked me out.
The biggest stretch of this is I had 3 cases of water and not 5 cases.

My sister-in-law a couple of months ago said I was looking better in my jeans right in front of my brother, thats when I said your wife is checking out my butt. Thats probably why she didn't say anything in front of me again.

[TCY Junkie]

I can assure you that would be my last trip to that barber

He doesn't cut my hair. Some girl about 35 does. Last time I went in there she told me after I got my haircut I had never looked so awesome, she was kidding around but wasn't.

[Suburban Rhythm]

So how is he "your barber" exactly?

Wouldn't "man employed as a barber, but not my barber, who is known to check out my ass" a better description?

[Pumpy Tudors]

Guys, don't talk shit about TCY Junkie.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Pumpy, are you in fact the barber?

[TCY Junkie]

If I was making this up the girl wouldn't have worked at a grocery store. I was thinking about that when I was writing it. No one is going to believe me, or even help me out.

[Pumpy Tudors]

welp guess i'm done here

[terpkristin]

Hey, you're MY age! What YOU doing tonight? ;) :D

/tk

[TCY Junkie]

So how is he "your barber" exactly?

Wouldn't "man employed as a barber, but not my barber, who is known to check out my ass" a better description?

He did cut my hair one time, just once I tell you, a long time ago. He owns the barber shop, no one else was their and he had a good side view when I walked in. They talked about crazy stuff in there when there is only a few in there. But by the time I left 6 people where in line and he told me to get some more jeans or something to that effect.

[TCY Junkie]

Hey, you're MY age! What YOU doing tonight? ;) :D

/tk

Don't know. My male cousin said numerous times he would marry me if I was a girl, self-centered guy just assumes the answer would have been yes.

[terpkristin]

Don't know. My male cousin said numerous times he would marry me if I was a girl, self-centered guy just assumes the answer would have been yes.

LOL. Gotta keep him guessing. ;)

/tk

[TCY Junkie]

LOL. Gotta keep him guessing. ;)

/tk

Well I'm pretty sure the lady that stayed with my grandma thinks I'm gay. We didn't have enough beds and so me and my cousin slept on the same bed. Hole to hole was the way we did it, but pole to pole would have been fine too. Anyway we never meet her and she is knocking on the glass window in the living room. I open the bedroom door slightly to see who it is, and my cousin that has no brain jumps on top of me, about that time she sees us double stacked on the bed looking out the door. She never mentioned it or even judged us, she was pretty cool for an 88 year old lady watching an 86 year old lady.

[ageofquarrel]

dude check the laws in your state 17 years old might be legal

[terpkristin]

Well I'm pretty sure the lady that stayed with my grandma thinks I'm gay. We didn't have enough beds and so me and my cousin slept on the same bed. Hole to hole was the way we did it, but pole to pole would have been fine too. Anyway we never meet her and she is knocking on the glass window in the living room. I open the bedroom door slightly to see who it is, and my cousin that has no brain jumps on top of me, about that time she sees us double stacked on the bed looking out the door. She never mentioned it or even judged us, she was pretty cool for an 88 year old lady watching an 86 year old lady.

You know, this brings to mind a conversation I got into with some guy friends of mine recently. They absolutely WILL NOT pass eachother pole to pole, it must be hole to hole. Like, if they're in a narrow-ish area, such as between tables in a restaurant, they've gone out of their way to ensure we know they're not gay. Then again, we never see one without the other, so it's sort of a running joke.

/tk

[Suburban Rhythm]

dude check the laws in your state 17 years old might be legal

He never says how old his sister and sister in law are either...he might be safe with them too.

He does mention the old lady neighbor is 88, so I know he's good there.

[TCY Junkie]

You know, this brings to mind a conversation I got into with some guy friends of mine recently. They absolutely WILL NOT pass eachother pole to pole, it must be hole to hole. Like, if they're in a narrow-ish area, such as between tables in a restaurant, they've gone out of their way to ensure we know they're not gay. Then again, we never see one without the other, so it's sort of a running joke.

/tk

Pole to hole is a big no no, no matter what. I thought even my cousin knew that.

[Suburban Rhythm]

You know, this brings to mind a conversation I got into with some guy friends of mine recently. They absolutely WILL NOT pass eachother pole to pole, it must be hole to hole. Like, if they're in a narrow-ish area, such as between tables in a restaurant, they've gone out of their way to ensure we know they're not gay. Then again, we never see one without the other, so it's sort of a running joke.

/tk

Are they together when they buy new jeans? I think that would give you the answer.

[TCY Junkie]

lollz TCYJunkie was at the gay bar Fudgepackers and the whole time thought he was at Fuddruckers.

Good thing for the lollz or I would have reported you to pumpy.

[AlexB]

He did cut my hair one time, just once I tell you, a long time ago. He owns the barber shop, no one else was their and he had a good side view when I walked in. They talked about crazy stuff in there when there is only a few in there. But by the time I left 6 people where in line and he told me to get some more jeans or something to that effect.

What style did he suggest? A Brazilian?

[TCY Junkie]

dude check the laws in your state 17 years old might be legal
Yeah its 17, but what if she's younger and what is a good way to find out her age, I am to young, good looking, and soft SKINNED to go to jail.

[TCY Junkie]

He never says how old his sister and sister in law are either...he might be safe with them too.

He does mention the old lady neighbor is 88, so I know he's good there.

Leave my sisters out of it just this one time. Man.
And this happened 3 years ago and 200 miles away. And I don't want drive that far for a 91 year old, even though she seems pretty flexible.

[samifan24]

This thread is awesome.

[TCY Junkie]

This thread is awesome.

Truth is funnier than fiction.

[TCY Junkie]

Maybe I should go buy a seventeen magazine and ask her if the magazine and her have anything in common.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Maybe I should go buy a seventeen magazine and ask her if the magazine and her have anything in common.

You can pick them both up for under $5?

[TCY Junkie]

You can pick them both up for under $5?
I don't know if I'm going to do it, the fuddruckers thing still has me shaking my head.

[TCY Junkie]

She is kind of shorter than most girls I'm attracted to, maybe pumpy is rubbing off on me. You take that any way you want to. Just quoting pumpy.

[Pumpy Tudors]

sup baby ;)

[Karlifornia]

note to self: Create thread about every time a girl has checked you out. It's really endearing.

[TCY Junkie]

note to self: Create thread about every time a girl has checked you out. It's really endearing.
You just don't understand my problems.

[TCY Junkie]

sup baby ;)
Trying to figure out her age without looking creepy. I keep forgetting how young looking I am. When I bought a truck at 24, the guy asked if I was 16 yet.

[Logan]

I make I contact with her

What a gem.

[Julio Riddols]

The only reason I ever enjoyed large family gatherings was that sometimes our cousins would stick around for the night and we would all spoon. they all cut hair now, and I just wish I could be gay without all the scrutiny. I didn't have the money for cosmetology school.

[TCY Junkie]

What a gem.
One person on this forum doesn't get my humor. And its not you.

[Passacaglia]

This totally smacks of effort.

[st.cronin]

I don't really get TCYJ's humor, but I do like the pic of him with the devils horns in the computer lab.

[timmynausea]

A fat dude loses some weight, and the next thing you know he's telling stories about some mundane flirting like he's Brad Pitt getting mauled by women wherever he goes. I've seen it a million times.

[TCY Junkie]

dude check the laws in your state 17 years old might be legal

I gonna put you on my buddy list. Anyone that believes a guy that looks 10 years younger and doesn't know the minimum age is gullible.

I don't really get TCYJ's humor, but I do like the pic of him with the devils horns in the computer lab.
I will explain it to you since you like norm.
I went to fuddruckers and this dick called me over to his station when I was in front of this girl's register. Thought that was weird and then the guy started waving like crazy and asked me to come back when I left. It really disturbed me. And was going to post about it. I put in the title and thats when I thought everyone else talks about how good they are and their girl troubles, so I will make something up to put that down and since I'm young looking I went with that. Thought everyone knew I was making fun of other message boards and their girl threads, guess not.

There is a girl and most of this true,(espically about the barber) but I didn't come here to complain, I comes to entertain.

[st.cronin]

I gonna put you on my buddy list. Anyone that believes a guy that looks 10 years younger and doesn't know the minimum age is gullible.


I will explain it to you since you like norm.
I went to fuddruckers and this dick called me over to his station when I was in front of this girl's register. Thought that was weird and then the guy started waving like crazy and asked me to come back when I left. It really disturbed me. And was going to post about it. I put in the title and thats when I thought everyone else talks about how good they are and their girl troubles, so I will make something up to put that down and since I'm young looking I went with that. Thought everyone knew I was making fun of other message boards and their girl threads, guess not.

There is a girl and most of this true,(espically about the barber) but I didn't come here to complain, I comes to entertain.

"other message boards" ... what does that mean.

[TCY Junkie]

"other message boards" ... what does that mean.
I don't know, so I guess I'm busted.

[TCY Junkie]

A fat dude loses some weight, and the next thing you know he's telling stories about some mundane flirting like he's Brad Pitt getting mauled by women wherever he goes. I've seen it a million times.
Yeah, so why didn't you get it.

[Pumpy Tudors]

I'm loving this, quite honestly.

[st.cronin]

This thread is useless without pics.

[Lathum]

This thread is useless without pics.

his ass, the cashier or the barber?

[Lathum]

dola- if you think you get hit on alot now wait until you get married.

If I made a post everytime some female looked at me I'm be at Jeeber level

[TCY Junkie]

I'm loving this, quite honestly.
I did it all for the Pumpy.C'mon
The Pumpy
C'mon
So you can take that cookie

[TCY Junkie]

his ass, the cashier or the barber?
My ass doesn't look 10 years younger, its the other end that has BS coming out of it that looks young.

[terpkristin]

dola- if you think you get hit on alot now wait until you get married.

If I made a post everytime some female looked at me I'm be at Jeeber level

LOL.

Though that's interesting. That's one of the first things I look for, and if it's there, it's off-limits for flirting/oogling. In a male-dominated industry, there are a LOT of guys out there. And so far I've found that in my company, by and large if they don't have a ring, there's a reason... ;) Maybe I'll find my guy at the gym. :D

/tk

[terpkristin]

his ass, the cashier or the barber?

All of the above? :popcorn: :D

/tk

[TCY Junkie]

LOL.

Though that's interesting. That's one of the first things I look for, and if it's there, it's off-limits for flirting/oogling. In a male-dominated industry, there are a LOT of guys out there. And so far I've found that in my company, by and large if they don't have a ring, there's a reason... ;) Maybe I'll find my guy at the gym. :D

/tk
Thats what my uncle said about my 29 year old sister-in-law. She is nice, and can't say anything else about her hair.

[Lathum]

LOL.

Though that's interesting. That's one of the first things I look for, and if it's there, it's off-limits for flirting/oogling.

/tk

Here is the thing TK.

Women are pigs. Way worse then men.

They want unattatched sex just as much as men do if not more. The best way to do that is find a married guy.

[st.cronin]

his ass, the cashier or the barber?

None of the above, I was thinking of TCYJ's computer lab. I assume he has TCY installed on every one of those computers.

[st.cronin]

Women are pigs. Way worse then men.


This is, in my experience, absolutely and without question TRUE.

[terpkristin]

Here is the thing TK.

Women are pigs. Way worse then men.

They want unattatched sex just as much as men do if not more. The best way to do that is find a married guy.

Hmm. I guess I'm an exception to that rule. I'm OK with being an exception. :) FWIW, I think that if you were local to me, I'd still probably want to hang out with you. But I wouldn't unabashedly flirt with you. :D

/tk

[TCY Junkie]

None of the above, I was thinking of TCYJ's computer lab. I assume he has TCY installed on every one of those computers.
I don't play that anymore. I was hitting bride recruit like I always do and a box popped up and told me it was the 1,000,000 time I hit that and I had no morales or life and that this was for my own good and to get out of the house and also take a morals class. Then it deleted all my saved files. It didn't delete the 216 draft files I had saved, does anyone know what they are good for? Thanks, Jim I really needed a break.

I was going to post a pic, but I guess not.

[terpkristin]

I was going to post a pic, but I guess not.

DO IT!

/tk

[st.cronin]

I don't play that anymore. I was hitting bride recruit like I always do and a box popped up and told me it was the 1,000,000 time I hit that and I had no morales or life and that this was for my own good and to get out of the house and also take a morals class. Then it deleted all my saved files. It didn't delete the 216 draft files I had saved, does anyone know what they are good for? Thanks, Jim I really needed a break.

I was going to post a pic, but I guess not.

What's wrong with briding recruits?

[Karlifornia]

Has the whole world gone insane?

[TCY Junkie]

What's wrong with briding recruits?
Nothing, I was posting out of character.

[TCY Junkie]

Has the whole world gone insane?

Where have you been, under a rock your whole life.

[Lathum]

But I wouldn't unabashedly flirt with you. :D

/tk

I beg to differ, just ask St Cronin. I'm irresistable.

[st.cronin]

I beg to differ, just ask St Cronin. I'm irresistable.

Come on, dude. What happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.

[Lathum]

I even look manly with a frozen drink


http://img72.imageshack.us/img72/6528/81955000np8.png (http://imageshack.us)

[TCY Junkie]

I even look manly with a frozen drink


http://img72.imageshack.us/img72/6528/81955000np8.png (http://imageshack.us)

Yeah, but can you look manly calling a dog named precious?

DO IT!

/tk

I never thought of myself as sexy and didn't say I was great looking, just too good looking for prison life(mainly too young looking and too soft skinned). I went to a casino last month and they looked at my license, and said "I thought you just turned 21 at most". I will post this to entertain the masses, not just Karlifornia. Its not very good quality but I don't really care much how I look so I don’t have any great quality pictures, actually my nephew took this last week when he was taking pictures of everything with my phone. My cheeks are red because my nephew just kept messing with things, and its hard to take someone serious when you tell them to quit, but laugh while doing that and afterwards. (Poor kid didn't now how serious I was, well he knows now. Ignore this comment if you don't think child abuse can be made fun of at all.) But I do look like I'm blushing frequently because of my pale pale skin. Can I say anything positive about myself without getting bashed, oh I don't care, I have a plethora of hair for someone with dirty dirty blond hair and most of its on my head.

http://img294.imageshack.us/img294/872/0616081515hf5.th.jpg (http://img294.imageshack.us/my.php?image=0616081515hf5.jpg)

[EagleFan]

This thread is awesome.

You have a very low "awesome bar".

[TCY Junkie]

No good deed goes unpunished and you can’t please everyone. If you don’t like it, tell the others not to post because I’m no post whore. I might be back and post some more in the OFF TOPIC forum if the people that don’t get my humor don’t crap all over my thread by attacking posters that like it and make terrible parody threads because they don’t get it and others that like it make it long.

I glanced at the parody thread. And you guys sucked at finding the hidden message from my message in that thread, it was clear no one in there got it but Pumpy. Most you guys in there don’t even have a clue what is going on and assume things. And also I’m easily distracted and don’t want to go astray and stop trying to please Pumpy.

I don’t even care that much, then why I’m I posting this. Well I get my kicks from making others laugh. Check me out in other threads, I never talk highly of myself. And if that was what you thought was happening we are opposites because your mind is a closed as a frog’s ass.(opening)

Again sorry guys that didn’t like it, you probably won’t like much of what I write, but just trying to entertain some folks every now and then.

Most(51% or more) of it is true but good luck figuring out what is true and what is not, but I thought it was crystal clear to anyone with a sense of humor I was making fun of all the threads about people having trouble with girls and a little bit about guys talking big and other things because I can’t stay on topic, but I guess it wasn’t clear to everyone.

That’s the end of me trying to defend that little piece of entertainment that just snowballed more than I thought it would, but if you know how to figure out a girls age in a non-creepy way let me know or don't you might upset someone that doesn't understand. If you believe everything on the internet, now is a good time to rethink that because I make stuff up as I go and things that start as truths and have meaning, which is usually not what you first think of, are more than embellished when I finish with them.

If you think I need to calm down, that’s fine. I just wanted people to get it and be entertained and maybe smile once, and by the parody thread that didn’t happen. Man I am coming of as a puss caring about entertaining others. It won’t happen again. It is still to be determined.

Man that fuddruckers guy was strange, I won't forget that for a while.

[korme]

You:
A. Attract
1. Females of illegal interaction
2. Gays

Ouch, you got a rough ticket

[Karlifornia]

Check me out in other threads



I'm gonna check you out in every thread, hot boy. Can I suck your dick?

[Zelig]

Oh, I will dine on honeydew
And drink the milk of Paradise

[Flasch186]

Maybe I'll find my guy at the gym. :D

/tk

or the E.R.

oh, and TCY....just try using more acronyms. It's like Cowbell.

http://files.myopera.com/BOSOX/albums/36990/cowbell.gif

I gotta FEEVAH!

[TCY Junkie]

You:
A. Attract
1. Females of illegal interaction
2. Gays

Ouch, you got a rough ticket

Thats some of the minor messages I sent. The main message I was trying to get out is that there are way too many guys that thank they are God's gift to women. I was just going to post about the guy, but the only title I thought of was "has this ever happened to you", thats when the title popped in my head, and spent too much time creating the rest.

I'm gonna check you out in every thread, hot boy. Can I suck your dick?
I will take that as a compliment coming from you. I knew this would happen after I posted that pic, I can bring out all the fairies. Sorry, I'm here to please people, but not people that don't get me. Your pathetic parody thread, made me embarrassed to be a member here. You questioned my integrity as a smartass on here thinking I was serious and posted that stuff that had no hidden meaning that I could find.

[Raiders Army]

.

[TCY Junkie]

I go from one end to the other.
Karlifornia, I seriously want to be friends with you and get along, I think we can if you don’t stick your dick where it won’t belong. It might be hard for you because of your size, all the girls must feel like they won a prize.

[Flasch186]

:popcorn:

[Blade6119]

One person on this forum doesn't get my humor. And its not you.

Make it 2, i found your posts to be utterly lacking in both humor or intelligence, and that's saying something coming from me. Simply not funny, and really not all that nice considering the people you are mocking often times have serious issues they are facing.

[TCY Junkie]

Make it 2, i found your posts to be utterly lacking in both humor or intelligence, and that's saying something coming from me. Simply not funny, and really not all that nice considering the people you are mocking often times have serious issues they are facing.

I mocking guys that think they are God's gift to women. Are you really that sensitive about that?

[Pumpy Tudors]

I absolutely 100% "got" this thread, but I've eaten battery acid and called my Spanish teacher a cheap whore by accident in a freshman-level course... so what do I know?

[Lathum]

I mocking guys that think they are God's gift to women. Are you really that sensitive about that?

don't mock me

[TCY Junkie]

Man, this is worse than when I have to explain my jokes to my brother, and I don't ever bother telling jokes to my cousin(yes the same cousin).

The guy at fuddruckers cock blocked me, maybe it was his girlfriend, it was extremly weird. But she definitely looked at him and sighed. No wonder I didn't find many post here funny over the years. I just have a different sense of humor than you guys. I was going to tell you about what happen today at whataburger because of my fishing shades, but not now. Guess I will just post a few times a month, because I can't compete with Pumpy's really random short thoughts, and I have to get into a story and kind of into character to be funny, and offend too many here that are SOFT skinned. Maybe I should just post in horse racing threads and on Pumpy Day.

Anyway I have to come back every once and a while and talk about pumpy's penis size and I guess ageofquarrel's massive size too.

[Lathum]

so wait...

this thread was a joke?

[BYU 14]

I absolutely 100% "got" this thread, but I've eaten battery acid and called my Spanish teacher a cheap whore by accident in a freshman-level course... so what do I know?

Don't forget the paint chips....

[BYU 14]

so wait...

this thread was a joke?

What, I hid my wife's Car keys for no reason?

[TCY Junkie]

so wait...

this thread was a joke?

Sorry to leave you hanging so long, I have never done that to a guy that looks manly with a frozen drink.

I go to the edge and then 10 steps over, I don't now how many steps Pumpy goes over but he goes over far more often than I do and I thinks he has and endless supply.

After Karlifornia posted in my thread I started trying to notice who got my sense of humor. Some of you I couldn't tell. I was having fun until Pumpy fucking ended the game. I can't stay mad at Pumpy, if he was taller some people would confuse him with Richard Pryor.

I spent too long making the original so it would offend the minimum and still entertain some. Then Karlifornia distracted me with his parody thread, maybe because I only understood mine, but it was nothing like mine to me. I might be an ass's ass for making fun of asses who think they are God's gift to women, but he is an ass's ass's ass. But thats okay, I would still hangout with him because unlike me he attracts hot women.

[Pumpy Tudors]

In a way, I almost want to jump out of a tree.

[TCY Junkie]

In a way, I almost want to jump out of a tree.
Don't do that in your current state you might hit someone with something most would confuse as a bat.

[Lathum]

Don't do that in your current state you might hit someone with something most would confuse as a bat.

was that a racial comment?

[TCY Junkie]

was that a racial comment?big penis comment

[Lathum]

big penis comment

so your saying black people have bis penises?

[TCY Junkie]

so your saying black people have bis penises?
Pumpy Yes

[TCY Junkie]

big penis comment

so your saying black people have bis penises?

I don't know if your serious, but I have all these busted onion rings for proof.


On a side note, I just want to get along with everyone I can. Even in college I was like that. This girl sat next to me and I would be friendly and she wouldn't say anything. She wasn't even attractive to me, but it took up to about 2 weeks for college was out before she started being nice. Man, she was a bitch.

[Lathum]

She wasn't even attractive to me.

based on this thread all women are attracted to you

[Izulde]

FWIW, I find TCYJ amusing. :D

[Racer]

I got a good chuckle out of TCYJ's post as well. Lot of different senses of humor out there I think. Some more prevalent then others.

[TCY Junkie]

I was about to fall asleep when, I always have random thoughts in my head and thought why did lathum say that and then something popped in my head that wasn't nice, my mind is not as racially trained, which just means your life experiences, as yours so I will tell you how it went down in my head.

In a way, I almost want to jump out of a tree.

I just told Pumpy he could be confused for Richard Pryor, which makes him feel really good, even bulletproof in my mind. So he decides to jump to see if he really is superman.

Don't do that in your current state you might hit someone with something most would confuse as a bat.

Knowing Pumpy is excited in all areas, I made that comment because in my mind it was late at night and he had his flannel pants or sweat pants on before going to bed. Thus he could of had his manhood confused as a concealed baseball bat.

was that a racial comment?
The only thing racial I thought I said was comparing him to Richard Pryor. See why I didn't post for so long, I don't think most people get me. Do you want me to explain to you also that in the mcdonalds thread I was being sarcastic about the post. And wanted people to stand up for minimum wage employees(even if it was only in their mind). I was acting like I had proof all minimum wage employees where useless because one person gave me a bowl instead of a plate. Another post I made has meaning too, and it is positive but not direct. This thread was created to make fun of vain guys, which I have been once or twice myself, sometimes I just can't help to check out my butt. In case you don't know that I don't do that, I don't, I let my barber do it for me.

based on this thread all women are attracted to you
Was this a joke, if so thanks for trying. I really want to say something but I don't think you get me.

[Ragone]

The barber in question

http://www.brutusthebarberbeefcake.com/BARBARSHOP1%20copy.gif

[Karlifornia]

Yeah..this guy is a humorist, just like Uri Geller is a spoon bender.

[TCY Junkie]

I forgot to mention this from my vision last night and this my belong in the TMI thread but I imagined someone walking by and Pumpy not seeing them and knocking them out, not up, cold. I really couldn’t tell if it was a guy or a girl, it could have been because it was night time or just one of those people. Lathum don’t get too upset, I know you’re manly, but do find this offensive too. Man, I think times like these my imagination is to vivid.

If anyone still really thinks I’m vain and really real, how many people do you know that are vain that wear their pants so baggy on their rear that their barber mentions it. Okay that should make some people use some logic for once. I lost weight because I started to get into shape, one day after playing poker for 5 hours straight, I got up and kind of leaned to much forward but corrected it with I guess something in my heel. Because the next day it hurt and for the next 6 months I couldn’t stretch it and bend forward and it bothered me for 3 years. I probably should have gone to the doctor but I’m only a puss about entertaining others. If you care its better now that I exercise.

I use my brain
to entertain,
my looks
are as fascinating as the cover of most books,
and my humor is so strange
you probably think I’m derange.


FWIW, I find TCYJ amusing. :D

I got a good chuckle out of TCYJ's post as well. Lot of different senses of humor out there I think. Some more prevalent then others.

Thanks guys, lets get together and have a weiner roast at Pumpy’s, I will bring the small buns.

[TCY Junkie]

Yeah..this guy is a humorist, just like Uri Geller is a spoon bender.
I can tell your sense of humor, maybe you would like my imaginary friend post better in the Mcdonald's thread. It has no hidden message and was created for the Pumpy.

Are you the humor police, if so you suck at your job. You should have a wide range of knowing what's funny. Do I have to get hit in the balls again to entertain you, if so it's not worth it, but it was for Pumpy. This thread is not laugh your butt off funny until the next post, to get it you have to think and then be amused. You should be thinking that TCYJ has one strange sense of humor.

[Pumpy Tudors]

So I was plowing this air conditioner the other day, and my wife walked in with an accountant. They asked me if I had any cheese, and I told them that Danny Glover was in the other room eating it all, so they should either talk to him or go into the garage and fuck off.

So while they're in the garage fucking off, Danny Glover came in and asked me if there was a hockey game on. I told him that hockey season ended a few weeks ago, and if he gave a damn about hockey, he would have known that already. Now, I forgot what I had told my wife and the accountant before, so I told Danny Glover to go into the garage and fuck himself.

So Danny Glover was in the garage fucking himself, and this guy came into the room wearing only a fluorescent green g-string. He asked me why he hadn't seen me in a few years, and I told him that my mom didn't like the drinks at his bar, so she didn't take me there anymore. He suggested that I visit the bar without my mom, but I told him that my mom and I are far too close for that, so he should perhaps go into the garage and fuck Danny Glover.

So the guy in the g-string was in the garage fucking Danny Glover, and Kathy Griffin came into the room to visit me. I told her that I wanted to play with her knockers, and she said that the word "knockers" was offensive. Then she told me to go into the garage and fuck a duck.

So I was in the garage fucking this duck, and my wife tripped over a garbage can, the accountant fell into our wheelbarrow, unsettling the wheelbarrow just enough to tip it over onto Danny Glover, while Danny Glover managed to free his hand just quickly enough to turn his body into such a way that he'd land on his left ass cheek, which caused the guy in the g-string to get his scrotum pinched on the duck's bill. My wife got embarrassed and went upstairs. The accountant got embarrassed and went home. Danny Glover got embarrassed and went to the store for more cheese. I got embarrassed and went into the yard. The guy in the g-string and the duck are getting married next Saturday, and Kathy Griffin is going to be the best man.

I was not invited to the wedding.

[TCY Junkie]

So I was plowing this air conditioner the other day, and my wife walked in with an accountant. They asked me if I had any cheese, and I told them that Danny Glover was in the other room eating it all, so they should either talk to him or go into the garage and fuck off.

So while they're in the garage fucking off, Danny Glover came in and asked me if there was a hockey game on. I told him that hockey season ended a few weeks ago, and if he gave a damn about hockey, he would have known that already. Now, I forgot what I had told my wife and the accountant before, so I told Danny Glover to go into the garage and fuck himself.

So Danny Glover was in the garage fucking himself, and this guy came into the room wearing only a fluorescent green g-string. He asked me why he hadn't seen me in a few years, and I told him that my mom didn't like the drinks at his bar, so she didn't take me there anymore. He suggested that I visit the bar without my mom, but I told him that my mom and I are far too close for that, so he should perhaps go into the garage and fuck Danny Glover.

So the guy in the g-string was in the garage fucking Danny Glover, and Kathy Griffin came into the room to visit me. I told her that I wanted to play with her knockers, and she said that the word "knockers" was offensive. Then she told me to go into the garage and fuck a duck.

So I was in the garage fucking this duck, and my wife tripped over a garbage can, the accountant fell into our wheelbarrow, unsettling the wheelbarrow just enough to tip it over onto Danny Glover, while Danny Glover managed to free his hand just quickly enough to turn his body into such a way that he'd land on his left ass cheek, which caused the guy in the g-string to get his scrotum pinched on the duck's bill. My wife got embarrassed and went upstairs. The accountant got embarrassed and went home. Danny Glover got embarrassed and went to the store for more cheese. I got embarrassed and went into the yard. The guy in the g-string and the duck are getting married next Saturday, and Kathy Griffin is going to be the best man.

I was not invited to the wedding.

I'm not sure, but I think I love it.

[Pumpy Tudors]

I'm not sure, but I think I love it.
Great, now at least 15 people are going to come in here and shit on it. It's just like the cake from my 10th birthday all over again.

[TCY Junkie]

Great, now at least 15 people are going to come in here and shit on it. It's just like the cake from my 10th birthday all over again.
Sorry

[TCY Junkie]

Dola

I’m really not interested in a 17 year old girl that works at the grocery store. I want someone that can support my addiction to rice cakes with sour cream and a touch of antifreeze mixed together. I’m just not interested in her, well most of me isn’t.

[Pumpy Tudors]

So I'm trying to eat my birthday cake, and then somebody comes in and tries to shit on it...

Never mind.

[gkb]

So I'm trying to eat my birthday cake, and then somebody comes in and tries to shit on it...

Never mind.

Dammit Pumpy, don't leave me hanging like that...and stay away from my wife.

[rkmsuf]

I can't believe Pumpy didn't break out his jbmagic RealDoll during that episode.

[TCY Junkie]

So I'm trying to eat my birthday cake, and then somebody comes in and tries to shit on it...

Never mind.
You have worse luck with cakes then I have finding someone bangable.

[Logan]

FWIW, I find TCYJ amusing. :D

I can't tell if he's funny, as his posts are so damn long and wordy that I give up after about two sentences. He needs to adapt Quentin's "pussy eating opening scene from True Romance method" to draw people in.

[TCY Junkie]

I can't tell if he's funny, as his posts are so damn long and wordy that I give up after about two sentences. He needs to adapt Quentin's "pussy eating opening scene from True Romance method" to draw people in.

I respect that, was kind of seeing how many wouldn't get it after reading it. It wasn't until someone said the so called parody thread was better that I took them serious and actually reread my post, it was what I wanted it to be. I thought I was having some witty banter with some members and maybe I was. I won't spend this much time creating an original thread for that purpose any more my experiment is complete. Sorry anyone, if you feel used like a 2 bit whore.

[st.cronin]

I respect that, was kind of seeing how many wouldn't get it after reading it. It wasn't until someone said the so called parody thread was better that I took them serious and actually reread my post, it was what I wanted it to be. I thought I was having some witty banter with some members and maybe I was. I won't spend this much time creating an original thread for that purpose any more my experiment is complete. Sorry anyone, if you feel used like a 2 bit whore.

I like you. I respect what you've done.

[TCY Junkie]

I like you. I respect what you've done.

Thanks but I'm not going to talk about your penis size later, I will do it now. If you get a microscope you can tell your penis is slightly larger than the average penis.

So I went to the pharmacy to get some Viagra for the guy I picked off the streets yesterday. And this girl was really checking me out in my Tahoe, I only bought it to remind me I like my women tall. She was asking this and that. She asked where I lived and even for my autograph. I could tell she wanted me so I told her I was going to go home and then go to the neighbors because they have kids and take a two hour power nap with their stuffed animals. Well I come home from my nap and my SUV is gone, maybe I shouldn’t have told her my keys where under the 7th gnome in the courtyard. She probably is just taking it for a ride like I will her when she gets back, she has only been gone 3 hours and 7 minutes.
Part of me doesn’t think she is coming back and I could have lived without finding out today that I have to shave my balls to get my penis pump to work properly.

This should show you I don't fucking care about my image.

I thought I was rubbing off on you guys, well I did to a couple but I’m not naming names, then I was talking to someone and almost cursed. I usually only curse in person once every year on the 21st, this site is corrupting me.

Oh, and my past barber I went to actually did freak me out. He was married but I’m sure it was a cover, since he talked and acted really feminine. He would put shampoo in my hair and scrub really good and then blow dry with one hand and caressed with the other hand until all the liquids where out of it. I grew suspicious when the last time I went, there was a guy that actually had hair on top of his head and he didn’t shampoo it at all. I’m not even going to mention what he did with his vacuum in the end. This was a small town barber that worked with his dad, so he probably didn't know he had options.

[Balldog]

Is your name Dmitri?

<object width="464" height="392"><param name="movie" value="http://embed.break.com/NTI3NTc5"></param><embed src="http://embed.break.com/NTI3NTc5" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" width="464" height="392"></embed></object><br><font size=1><a href="http://view.break.com/527579">http://view.break.com/527579</a> - Watch more <a href="http://www.break.com/">free videos</a></font>

[mrsimperless]

Is this thread seriously?

[TCY Junkie]

Is your name Dmitri?

<object height="392" width="464">
<embed src="http://embed.break.com/NTI3NTc5" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" height="392" width="464"></object>
http://view.break.com/527579 - Watch more free videos (http://www.break.com/)

My name is "the guy that thinks he is God's gift to women, but can't find anyone doable", and if they are doable they are only interested in his ride not a ride.The point is he is an ass not getting an ass. Just like in the real world, right.

I loved that, I heard it on the way home today.

I only caught the last 2 minutes, thanks for the whole thing.

[Karlifornia]

Maybe I was just completely wrong. It's possible...it's happened many a time. Maybe I just wasn't in the joke, TCY Junkie. Explain the joke to me. Or don't. I am willing to admit I was just being a humorless prick that just attacked like a stepped-on rattlesnake. So, was the original post a story you made up in your head?

[Pumpy Tudors]

SHIT'S ABOUT TO GET BUCK WILD UP IN HERE

[st.cronin]

I don't know if I should admit this, but I have never quite understood Pumpy Tudors' sense of humor, either. I find many of his jokes funny, but I have always suspected that what I was laughing at was not the intended source of humor, but something that I alone found funny.

[path12]

I have always suspected that what I was laughing at was not the intended source of humor, but something that I alone found funny.

I don't think that's unusual. Quite a bit of what I find funny is just to me.

[st.cronin]

I don't think that's unusual. Quite a bit of what I find funny is just to me.

Oh, but I do get *your* sense of humor.

[path12]

Oh, but I do get *your* sense of humor.

This is why we're not in Pumpy's or TCYJ's league. :)

[Poli]

:popcorn:

[Lorena]

This thread need lolcats

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/funny-pictures-you-always-get-the-cheap-litter.jpg

[Lorena]

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/funny-pictures-cat-ponders-buddhas-teachings.jpg

[st.cronin]

I prefer jbmagicats:

<a href='http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=1454663' ><img src='http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/7/1/myoaklandraide128594191072482336.jpg' alt='funny pictures' /></a><br />moar <a href='http://icanhascheezburger.com'>funny pictures</a>

[Pumpy Tudors]

I don't know if I should admit this, but I have never quite understood Pumpy Tudors' sense of humor, either. I find many of his jokes funny, but I have always suspected that what I was laughing at was not the intended source of humor, but something that I alone found funny.
If I may be halfway serious for a moment, that's kind of the idea. My jokes are meta-jokes. I touch everyone in a different way. That's why we all walk differently.

[st.cronin]

If I may be halfway serious for a moment, that's kind of the idea. My jokes are meta-jokes. I touch everyone in a different way. That's why we all walk differently.

I like you. I respect what you've done. I just wish there was a way for me to touch you.

[Pumpy Tudors]

I like you. I respect what you've done. I just wish there was a way for me to touch you.
Just use your penis. That's how the guy at the grocery store does it.

[st.cronin]

<a href='http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=1454754' ><img src='http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/7/1/128594199070607336.jpg' alt='funny pictures' /></a><br />moar <a href='http://icanhascheezburger.com'>funny pictures</a>

[st.cronin]

<a href='http://mine.icanhascheezburger.com/view.aspx?ciid=1454815' ><img src='http://images.icanhascheezburger.com/completestore/2008/7/1/128594205995763586.jpg' alt='funny pictures' /></a><br />moar <a href='http://icanhascheezburger.com'>funny pictures</a>

[cartman]

Wow, I had this great diatribe written up, but apparently there is a word limit at OperationsSports for posts.

[Poli]

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/02/funny-pictures-hippos-sing-harmony.jpg

[Passacaglia]

Wow, I had this great diatribe written up, but apparently there is a word limit at OperationsSports for posts.

If this thread is any indication, I figure the limit must be over 1000.

[TCY Junkie]

Sorry guys for not posting earlier, I was taking another power nap today and the neighbors came home early. The cops didn’t even let me put my clothes back on. I’m pretty good friends with these people, so after they found no manhood juice left on Mickey and Minnie they dropped the charges. Man, I have to admit this is a little embarrassing and I hope we can continue our friendship.

[TCY Junkie]

Maybe I was just completely wrong. It's possible...it's happened many a time. Maybe I just wasn't in the joke, TCY Junkie. Explain the joke to me. Or don't. I am willing to admit I was just being a humorless prick that just attacked like a stepped-on rattlesnake. So, was the original post a story you made up in your head?

I was going to write this about Karlifornia about when I accidentally ran into him at a club but decided he might take it the wrong way so I didn’t finish it. I didn’t know how it was going to end and really didn’t want to visualize it because I can still see Pumpy jumping out of a tree and knocking someone out.
He was grabbing this girls crotch. I noticed she had those Adriana Lima do me eyes, that’s when I cummed my pants. Then I noticed he had 6 fingers, wait one of those is bent the wrong way.

Do you get this humor? I put myself down more than you. You could have easily been distracted because you were kissing her twin on the other side.

I didn’t say identical, she could of had her original fun bags. The point is I definitely cummed my pants.




SHIT'S ABOUT TO GET BUCK WILD UP IN HERE

Oh how I wish I was here and not there.

This is why we're not in Pumpy's or TCYJ's league. :)

I diidn't know Pumpy was, but I'm not on any online league. Why in the hell wouldn't you want to play with him.

This thread need lolcats

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/funny-pictures-you-always-get-the-cheap-litter.jpg

I like most animals but I dont trust any pussy.

http://icanhascheezburger.files.wordpress.com/2008/06/funny-pictures-cat-ponders-buddhas-teachings.jpg

At least I can't see both of its eyes, I would trust me being able to hang my balls a quarter of an inch over a grinding wheel for 9 hours then I would a cat.

[path12]

At least I can't see both of its eyes, I would trust me being able to hang my balls a quarter of an inch over a grinding wheel for 9 hours then I would a cat.

I would imagine the cat would get pretty heavy after holding it for that long.

[st.cronin]

I would imagine the cat would get pretty heavy after holding it for that long.

See, that's what I'm talking about.

[TCY Junkie]

Maybe I was just completely wrong. It's possible...it's happened many a time. Maybe I just wasn't in the joke, TCY Junkie. Explain the joke to me. Or don't. I am willing to admit I was just being a humorless prick that just attacked like a stepped-on rattlesnake. So, was the original post a story you made up in your head?
Like I said earlier I go from one end to the other. And if I'm not joking around, I'm too serious so I joke around most of the time. The guy at fuddruckers had much more interesting truths in it, heck he could of been day dreaming of me, but I doubt it. Heck the barber probably said something because of my elongated butt crack, just kidding I had my shirt tucked in my very baggy pants. The first post was mostly true things, but severly manipulated to make it look like I was very vain. I didn't even think about posting the first two paragraphs until I thought of another title than "has this ever happened to you" Then I manipulated the fuddruckers paragraph and then thought up the rest. I just wanted to see who would chat with me and get to know the board and their sense of humor(I kind of already know pumpy's is random and wide so Ignored him like he would Marisa Miller if Kathy Griffin and her where in the same room with him) . I put as many jokes as I could in there to let people now I was joking and even mentioned my baggy pants( a big no no for someone vain), but then I went on and talked like I was serious and even put some truths in. I like to go one direction and then change to confuse some and keep it interesting. The first post is not suppose to be laugh out loud, just if you know what I posted in the past you shake your head and say what a goofy guy. I'm too lazy to make up everything so I just embellish the truth, The whole discussion afterwards was what I enjoyed the most. I have to visual must jokes to laugh, like:
so I told Danny Glover to go into the garage and fuck himself.

So Danny Glover was in the garage fucking himself,

I also visual things in my head in things I find humorous I post, like him making out with what he thought was a girl, then me saying he was probably distracted, which made it appear I was being nice and then said with her twin which was not so nice. I visualized it and laughed. I butchered the line because its not what I thought up, I thought up "on the other side you were kissing her twin" which is visually funny I think and what I posted was not as visual. Sorry for scewing it up, it was really funny in my head. Did anybody still visualize it or think it was decent the way I put it or even good the way I meant to put it?

My sense of humor is also a play on words and meaning like "but decided he might take it the wrong way so I didn’t finish it" Initially reading through it appears I care about his feelings but after reading the whole thing you should think it involves the girls dick in some way. Did anyone get this?

The bolded is what I believe to be true. I have seen her maybe three times in six months.

I look really young, like 20 or younger. I have been going to the this grocery store for the last two months and this girl that works there just will not stop checking me out. She gives me change with her hands cupped and then runs her fingers down my hand. Then one time she was bagging and I had five cases of water and I put one up there and she came over and told me they could just scan it with a tag they had and put my water back in my buggy for me. Well I caught her starring at my butt, I don't really blame her. I lost some weight and even my barber told me my pants where baggy around my butt, so I changed and man the women will not stop looking. I took my sister with me to get the jeans. The next day my sister-in-law comes over and after I leave comments about my butt to my sister. What is so fascinating about it, I can't really get a good view of it even though I've tried numerous times.

Back on topic I thought this girl was 19 or 20 but yesterday I went in there and she told the old man in front of me she was home schooled. Know I'm guessing she is 17. I'm kinda a different and can't get her out of my mind because her smile just draws me in like a fat guy to the buffet on steak night.

Another problem I had was today at Fuddruckers. I go in there in see this attractive girl, guessing she's 20. I make I contact with her and then look up to see what I want for sure. Maybe two seconds past and I proceed to her lane and then a guy about 20 said "I can take care of you over here". Seriously I heard the girl gasp. I was right in front of her and then I wasn't. After I went over to him I was wondering why I did(no gay comments). Why would he be so eager to take my order. I guess gays really are more aggressive. Then when I was leaving I thought I would look at her one more time and guess what happened. He was waving at me like a just gave him the best sexual fantasy of his life and told me to come back soon.

Basically I attract the young and been told I was queerbait when I was younger and appearantly its true. Damn these looks of mine.

[JeeberD]

I'm glad I've resisted posting in this thread...

































































Crap

[TCY Junkie]

I would imagine the cat would get pretty heavy after holding it for that long.

Yeah, I didn't say trust the cat at the end because I like leaving sentences open ended.
Do you mean holding a cat over a grinding wheel because I wouldn't have any trouble doing that, but if I had to hold a cat for 9 hours or I would lose my sense of humor then yeah it would get pretty heavy because I love to laugh.


I wrote this up after I saw Karlifornia's post and then my internet was down for hours and I don't feeling like editing now and I won't bring this thread up again soon unless some more post are made. This is the last time I'm going to explain things, because I go from one extreme to the other and this is not very entertaining, at least to me it isn't.


Hopefully this will offend less people if I explain it.

Oh, and my past barber I went to actually did freak me out. (I just don’t like it when other people aren’t themselves)

He was married but I’m sure it was a cover, since he talked and acted like really feminine. (I can be so attractive to guys they flirt with me and probably are only feminine when I’m around)

He would put shampoo in my hair and scrub really good and then blow dry with one hand and caressed with the other hand it until all the liquids where out of it. I grew suspicious when the last time I went, there was a guy that actually had hair on top of his head and he didn’t shampoo it at all. (I moved away so I didn’t see him any more, and this is proof this straight guy who was married was just acting feminine to get me)

I’m not even going to mention what he did with his vacuum in the end. (It was boring, he vacuumed my hair up, you guys and your dirty minds.
He lived in a small town and probably didn’t know he had any option. (Most of the town was gay, he probably thought I was and wanted to be friends so we could go bowling)

So if you don’t like gay towns, then bash away you homophobes.

I’m pretty good at messing up when I put these thoughts together or maybe I’m not. I now one thing I leave out words and my college teacher told me to stop it numerous times. Just kidding she wanted me, but she too was off limits.

Here is an overview for this thread. I created to make fun of guys who are really vain. My character only attracted girls not of age, guys, women that wanted more then himself or maybe a confused leisbian(which might be the only thing he can get), and a teacher. Only people that where not an option to him, yet he still thought he was God’s gift to women. I have my buddy list completed now. I wanted one so I would know when some that gets me is online and might feel like posting crap and also to see what the post in other threads to see what kind of humor they will give me back.

I go in and out of character in between thoughts so you guys learned a lot about me and I learned a little about you. Thanks

I thought about the process of getting a prescription thru the drive thru and having the guy think she was interested in him when all she liked were Tahoe’s then added some stuff so everyone new I was joking. Hopefully this will put an end to this character, I don’t want to think of any more people that are off limits to this guy and honestly don’t want to since the charade is over.

I had to post about my old barber because I was writing it in word(I have too many errors if I don’t) and about the time I was going to post it Pumpy ended my fun, but he can do that all he wants because I find him very humorous anyone else can too, but I think he’s great. I usually figure out before I finish reading where its headed, but Pumpy’s post are very random, which I love.

I feel like it was a good trade. I traded letting some people online now a little about me perhaps, which I have no value if I keep it to myself for getting know the board better. I think I had some witty banter on the first page, can you have witty banter if your the only one that knows, if so I definitely had some.

[Karlifornia]

Like I said earlier I go from one end to the other. And if I'm not joking around, I'm too serious so I joke around most of the time. The guy at fuddruckers had much more interesting truths in it, heck he could of been day dreaming of me, but I doubt it. Heck the barber probably said something because of my elongated butt crack, just kidding I had my shirt tucked in my very baggy pants. The first post was mostly true things, but severly manipulated to make it look like I was very vain. I didn't even think about posting the first two paragraphs until I thought of another title than "has this ever happened to you" Then I manipulated the fuddruckers paragraph and then thought up the rest. I just wanted to see who would chat with me and get to know the board and their sense of humor(I kind of already know pumpy's is random and wide so Ignored him like he would Marisa Miller if Kathy Griffin and her where in the same room with him) . I put as many jokes as I could in there to let people now I was joking and even mentioned my baggy pants( a big no no for someone vain), but then I went on and talked like I was serious and even put some truths in. I like to go one direction and then change to confuse some and keep it interesting. The first post is not suppose to be laugh out loud, just if you know what I posted in the past you shake your head and say what a goofy guy. I'm too lazy to make up everything so I just embellish the truth, The whole discussion afterwards was what I enjoyed the most. I have to visual must jokes to laugh, like:
so I told Danny Glover to go into the garage and fuck himself.

So Danny Glover was in the garage fucking himself,

I also visual things in my head in things I find humorous I post, like him making out with what he thought was a girl, then me saying he was probably distracted, which made it appear I was being nice and then said with her twin which was not so nice. I visualized it and laughed. I butchered the line because its not what I thought up, I thought up "on the other side you were kissing her twin" which is visually funny I think and what I posted was not as visual. Sorry for scewing it up, it was really funny in my head. Did anybody still visualize it or think it was decent the way I put it or even good the way I meant to put it?

My sense of humor is also a play on words and meaning like "but decided he might take it the wrong way so I didn’t finish it" Initially reading through it appears I care about his feelings but after reading the whole thing you should think it involves the girls dick in some way. Did anyone get this?

The bolded is what I believe to be true. I have seen her maybe three times in six months.

I look really young, like 20 or younger. I have been going to the this grocery store for the last two months and this girl that works there just will not stop checking me out. She gives me change with her hands cupped and then runs her fingers down my hand. Then one time she was bagging and I had five cases of water and I put one up there and she came over and told me they could just scan it with a tag they had and put my water back in my buggy for me. Well I caught her starring at my butt, I don't really blame her. I lost some weight and even my barber told me my pants where baggy around my butt, so I changed and man the women will not stop looking. I took my sister with me to get the jeans. The next day my sister-in-law comes over and after I leave comments about my butt to my sister. What is so fascinating about it, I can't really get a good view of it even though I've tried numerous times.

Back on topic I thought this girl was 19 or 20 but yesterday I went in there and she told the old man in front of me she was home schooled. Know I'm guessing she is 17. I'm kinda a different and can't get her out of my mind because her smile just draws me in like a fat guy to the buffet on steak night.

Another problem I had was today at Fuddruckers. I go in there in see this attractive girl, guessing she's 20. I make I contact with her and then look up to see what I want for sure. Maybe two seconds past and I proceed to her lane and then a guy about 20 said "I can take care of you over here". Seriously I heard the girl gasp. I was right in front of her and then I wasn't. After I went over to him I was wondering why I did(no gay comments). Why would he be so eager to take my order. I guess gays really are more aggressive. Then when I was leaving I thought I would look at her one more time and guess what happened. He was waving at me like a just gave him the best sexual fantasy of his life and told me to come back soon.

Basically I attract the young and been told I was queerbait when I was younger and appearantly its true. Damn these looks of mine.

Well, however it goes, friend-o. I'm sorry for being an asshole, I guess...I suppose we're just two different people. You're from Texas, I'm from California. You're hot, I'm hot too. You have barbers staring at your ass, I have barbers cutting my ass hair with their teeth. I think we're a lot more alike than I initially thought. Maybe not. In this crazy world, does it really matter?

[Lorena]

holy christ these posts are hella long, my attention span is too short... can someone summarize pls, kthx.

[st.cronin]

holy christ these posts are hella long, my attention span is too short... can someone summarize pls, kthx.

Lathum drinks like a woman, but makes love like an old man.
I drink like an old man, but make love like a woman.
Pumpy Tudors deals in meta-humor.
Path12 deals in regular humor.
TCYJ is from Texas, and is queerbait.

[TCY Junkie]

Well, however it goes, friend-o. I'm sorry for being an asshole, I guess...I suppose we're just two different people. You're from Texas, I'm from California. You're hot, I'm hot too. You have barbers staring at your ass, I have barbers cutting my ass hair with their teeth. I think we're a lot more alike than I initially thought. Maybe not. In this crazy world, does it really matter?

Don't be hard on yourself Karlifornia. I like to jerk with people. I was trying to get people to ask me about her features like hear and eyes and then start talking about something else. It was a part of my evil little plan to get know you guys. Actually, some super sensitive people that got my humor might think I insulted them, but they were either having witty banter or entertaining themselves by talking to me but not seriously helping me with my girl. I really doesn’t matter because I put myself down much more in all my threads than I would anybody else.

I’m kind of like a prairie dog, I go in one hole and then cum out another. Damn, my poor education sure is showing. Seriously I sucked at literature, but I sucked much more at the arts, mainly the female statues.





I have a strange sense of humor. And as for what I really want in a girl is someone that gets me 80 percent of the time, so I’m probably screwed, or not.
I thought of this last night before I could go to sleep. Its not like I try to think these things up all the time, they pop in my head, I really can't explain it and probably why I don't enjoy reading books because of my vivid and random imagination I feel most people get this out of books which helps them escape but I can't escape or maybe I'm already free. This is my get to know me thread.

[Pumpy Tudors]

I didn't mean to end your fun, TCY Junkie.

Anyway, on another note, I feel another Pumpy Tudors bye week coming on. Peace out, FOFC.

[TCY Junkie]

I didn't mean to end your fun, TCY Junkie.

Anyway, on another note, I feel another Pumpy Tudors bye week coming on. Peace out, FOFC.

You were just being nice. Either to me or to the people that didn't get it.

[TCY Junkie]

Hey bitches, did you get this? Do I need to start a pole. (I was talking to some hookers that might not of known me, butt I was going to please.)(did anyone get I was talking to hookers that I may have never meet and not going to start a poll also I'm pretty sure I'm a pimp to most of you even though I don't walk with a limp.(not a big penis joke))

My sense of humor is also a play on words and meaning like "but decided he might take it the wrong way so I didn’t finish it" Initially reading through it appears I care about his feelings but after reading the whole thing you should think it involves the girls dick in some way. Did anyone get this?




I just didn't want possibily my last post in here to be serious.

[rkmsuf]

I didn't mean to end your fun, TCY Junkie.

Anyway, on another note, I feel another Pumpy Tudors bye week coming on. Peace out, FOFC.

I invented the Pumpy Tudors bye week.

thank you.

[Poli]

The Pumpy Tudors Pogo Stick was much better.