Life really sucks sometimes (R.I.P., Gavin and Seth)

[gottimd]

So my wife and I have been married for 3 years and dated for 10 years. We finally got pregnant after we knew it was time that we wanted to start a family. Both sides were extremely happy and everyone was making all of these plans and preparations and then BAM....

My wife goes into labor last thursday afternoon at 22 weeks and 2 days pregnant. I've been posting on the NAFL board each day but I wanted to finally vent here as well. It was something undetected, something no one can diagnose until it actually happens. An incompetent cervix. Her cervix just started to dialate way too early, and it was nothing anyone did. So she was rushed to the Labor and Delivery ward, and to "halt" the delivery, they put her on a Magnesium drip, had her at an incline tilted towards her head. It was too late for a cerclage because the amniotic sac had breached the cervix. So we waited, minute by minute while my wife was on bed rest and couldn't move on the most horrible medicine you can give to a pregnant woman as she periodically bled. She showed incredible strength and I didn't leave her side for an entire week, and she stayed pregnant until the 23rd week, where our baby would have a very slim chance of survival. He was born at 9:19PM on July 22nd. Pink skin, good heart beat, and breathing well, and 1.5 pounds. However he had to be rushed to NICU because of his age.

So he has been there since, in an incubator hooked up to various things, like a science experiment. It has been extremely tough for us as we watch our son fighting for his life and we can't do anything for him. My wife keeps blaming herself. His potassium level is too high at the moment and he had a low pulse. They were giving him dopamine to even out the pulse. He got worse last night, then better. Then we got a call at 6am this morning from NICU, saying he has had a rough morning. His potassium went back up and his oxygen level is at 100%. This has been the biggest test of our marriage. We fought to give him a chance at life which was very tough, now we have to sit back and possibly watch the inevitable happen. Both of us our so emotionally worn down, and I don't think we have anymore tears left. He continues to fight and everyone continues to pray.

My only hope is that he can turn it around this morning and bounce back. He is now only 2.5 days old.

[wade moore]

My prayers are with you and your family. I can't imagine how difficult this is.

[Eaglesfan27]

My prayers are with you and your family as well. My wife and I have been trying to have a baby for the last year or so and we've had an early miscarriage already. It's been one of the most stressful things we've ever faced individually or as a couple and I can only imagine how much worse it must be to be facing this type of struggle at 22-23 weeks.

[PackerFanatic]

Being a dad now, I can't even imagine what you guys are going through. My thoughts and prayers are with you all and I hope everything works out for the best.

[cuervo72]

Thoughts and prayers, gotti.

[MacroGuru]

My prayers and thoughts are there for you and the little one, poetry always helps me get through the rough times and I know what your going through, this little poem is touching and may help....it's one of my favorites, I have given it to my wife framed..

A Newborn's Conversation with God

A baby asked God, 'They tell me you are
sending me to earth tomorrow, but how am I going to
live there being so small and helpless?' God said,
'Your angel will be waiting for you and will take
care of you.'

The child further inquired, 'But tell me, here in
heaven I don't have to do anything but sing and
smile to be happy.' God said, 'Your angel will sing
for you and will also smile for you . And you will
feel your angel's love and be very happy.'

Again the child asked, 'And how am I going to be
able to understand when people talk to me if I don't
know the language?' God said, 'Your angel will tell
you the most beautiful and sweet words you will ever hear, and
with much patience and care, your angel will teach
you how to speak.'

'And what am I going to do when I want to talk to
you?' God said, 'Your angel will place your hands
together and will teach you how to pray.'

'Who will protect me?' God said, 'Your angel will
defend you even if it means risking its life.'

'But I will always be sad because I will not see
you anymore.' God said, 'Your angel will always
talk to you about Me and will teach you the way to
come back to Me, even though I will always be next
to you.'

At that moment there was much peace in Heaven, but
voices from Earth could be heard and the child
hurriedly asked, 'God, if I am to leave now, please
tell me my angel's name.'

God said, 'You will simply call her, 'Mom.'

[Fidatelo]

Having gone through a couple of miscarriages, I can only imagine a small portion of your pain. I really hope things work out. :(

[Honolulu_Blue]

Good luck to you, your wife, and the baby. Hang in there.

[clemsonfan]

I'm so sorry. Your family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Maple Leafs]

Best wishes to you and your family.

[TroyF]

thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.

[Huckleberry]

Thoughts are with you.

[Neon_Chaos]

Hang in there. Things have a way of working themselves out. I hope everything turns out the best for you and your family.

[QuikSand]

Very, very sorry to hear... hoping for the best, and for you both to remain strong.

[Swaggs]

Thoughts are with you.

[spleen1015]

Best wishes. Having been pregnant 5 times and only having 1 kid to show for it, I can imagine how you feel.

[Telle]

My thoughts are with you.

[saldana]

cant even imagine how you feel...you have all my thoughts and prayers for your family

[gottimd]

I apologize to those who I may be bringing up bad memories for, but I just wanted to share this story as it happens to sort of vent to the public.

They are taking him off the ventilator, and his morning has already been rough so I hope he can fight through this stage. His potassium remains high, but he has gotten it down before. When they say they are taking him off the ventilator, before I did research, that sounded like "We are pulling the plug". But they have to take him off of it so he doesn't become dependant on it, among other issues.

[Lathum]

best wishes to you and your family.

[CamEdwards]

You're in my thoughts and prayers gottimd.

[Kodos]

Tough situation. I hope he pulls through. Sending good thoughts...

[gkb]

My wife and I will be praying for you and your family.

[MrIllini]

Strength to both your family and your little tyke.

[King of New York]

Hoping for the best for you and your family.

[Subby]

Hey man - hang in there. Sounds like you guys have done and are going all the right things here.

[flere-imsaho]

Good luck and best wishes - I can't imagine what that must be like to go through.

[Lorena]

Oh man, thoughts are with you gottimd.

How's your wife?

[gottimd]

We are both very emotionally drained. When one of us loses it, the other is there to comfort. Haven't heard anything from NICU yet, so I am hoping that things are getting better. Doctors were still doing rounds and we are about to leave soon.

Thank you all for your thoughts, prayers and sympathies. We need all of the support we can get, whether it be from people I have never met face to face or life long friends or family members.

[Antmeister]

I am hoping that in a couple months, you will be sharing the baby pics. When things are out of your control, it can really be maddening, but you will be amazed at how well hospitals do with premature births.

[MizzouRah]

You and your family will be in my prayers gottimd. :(

I couldn't even imagine what you and your wife have been through.

[Marc Vaughan]

Really sorry to hear you're going through this - hope he pulls through.

[RomaGoth]

Having three children and a fourth due in January, I can't even imagine how difficult this is for you and your wife. My thoughts and prayers are with you all and I expect some baby pics in the next few weeks.

[RomaGoth]

My prayers and thoughts are there for you and the little one, poetry always helps me get through the rough times and I know what your going through, this little poem is touching and may help....it's one of my favorites, I have given it to my wife framed..

Is there a place I can get this poem, perhaps framed? My wife would love it.

[path12]

Best wishes to you and your family. My thoughts are with you.

[DanGarion]

You all are in my thoughts...

[oliegirl]

Gotti, as everyone else has said, you are in my thoughts and prayers. I am so sorry you are having to go through this.

[CleBrownsfan]

I'll be thinking of your family gottimd. I have a 5 month little girl and couldn't imagine what you are going through.

Close friends of mine had twins at 22 weeks - one was born 1.5 pounds and the other was only a pound. Now they are 10 months and are very healthy babies - keep the faith.

Macro: very touching poem - ty for sharing

[Zelig]

we are praying for you.

[Celeval]

Prayers. Good luck.

[MacroGuru]

Is there a place I can get this poem, perhaps framed? My wife would love it.

I had read it a long time ago and I found it one day in a small shop...I bet you can find it online framed somewhere, I will hunt it down for you...

[Anthony]

i don't want to repeat what others have already said, but it's certainly sad to hear. i'll hug my newborn extra tight when he wakes up. i'm sure your wife is trying to put on a brave face and is doing all she can, make sure you comfort her and praise her more than usual. at least your baby has a fighting chance, others don't even get that chance (ie, miscarriage).

[tyketime]

It's truly the most difficult thing in life to sit back and watch your child suffer or struggle knowing there is nothing you can do about.

My thoughts and prayers go out to your family and I hope your son stabilizes as soon as possible so you can enjoy the miracle you've created!

[terpkristin]

I'll be keeping your family in my thoughts. It sounds like a truly frightening roller coaster to be on, keep strong.

/tk

[JeeberD]

You know y'all are in my thoughts, gottimd...

[SFL Cat]

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

[samifan24]

Your family is in my prayers.

[gottimd]

Bad news. The doctors gave us the MRI results. He has alot of brain hemmoraging. On a scale of 1-4, 4 being the worst, he has a 3 on one side and a 4 on the other. They said if he makes it past the weekend, there is an 80% of cerebral palsy or some other defect.

I am beyond pissed. He has fought so much and god is now in the process of taking my first born son from me. Our families are beyond devastated and our support system now needs a support system. I keep hoping that the 20% chance that he will pull through will come through but its hard. They talked to us about essentially a DNR if it gets that bad over the weekend.

[QuikSand]

I'm so very sorry to hear... still hoping for the best for you all.

[King of New York]

I'm so sorry about that bad news.

Peace to you and your family.

[hoopsguy]

Very, very sorry to hear this. I'll be pulling for the 20%.

[Lorena]

Sorry to hear gottimd, I continue to keep him in my thoughts.

[Lorena]

dola,

Having worked at an NICU, I've seen a lot of these cases turn for the better. What these babies lack in weight, they make up for in strength and resilience. Keep the faith.

[Zelig]

This really is bothering me, every good thought I own I am sending your way.

[Lorena]

This really is bothering me, every good thought I own I am sending your way.

Yeah me too. Truth be told that I've had him in my thoughts for a good portion of today since I read this thread.

[oliegirl]

I'm sorry just doesn't seem like enough, but I don't know what else to say. It's heartbreaking to know that you are going through this. I, like everyone else, am sending every positive thought and prayer your way.

[JPhillips]

God bless. I can't imagine what you're going through.

[RomaGoth]

I have also been thinking about this most of the day, and I continue to pray for all of you. No matter what the rest of us say, it cannot change anything, but rest assured that we are all pulling for your child to come out of this healthy.

[Eaglesfan27]

I'm very sorry to read this :(

[MizzouRah]

oh man gottimd.. so sorry to hear that.. :(

[EagleFan]

Very sorry to hear about this. Your family is in our prayers.

[PurdueBrad]

Your family is in the prayers of my family. I'm sorry to hear about this.

[Pyser]

good luck, gott.

[Crim]

Like everyone else, I'm wishing the best for you and your family, gottimd.

[Lathum]

don't know what to say that hasn't been said alreadt, me and my wife are so sorry

[thealmighty]

More prayers are on the way.

[Radii]

positive thoughts, man, I'm so sorry to hear that and hope for the best for your family :(

[gkb]

I can't even imagine what you and your family must be going through. I'm so sorry to hear the latest news. We'll be praying for you and yours this weekend.

[stevew]

I wish you the best and pray that you will have strength in this stressful time.

[CleBrownsfan]

I woke up this morning and the first thing I wanted to do is to get an update. I'm so sorry to hear about the latest - I'm thinking about you and your family a lot.

[gottimd]

So we got a call at 1:30am this morning telling us his levels are low and aren't bouncing back like they used to be. However they haven't called us back since. My wife and I will get him baptized I believe this morning. We have so many thoughts rushing through our heads, mainly all of the "why us?" The one gift that Gavin has given us is a stronger marriage.

The hardships my wife has gone through are so much. From losing her father at an early age, to a very close relative in 9/11, and now possibly our first born. We are out of tears, and my thoughts begin to turn to anger. Its hard to be in public and see kids or parents having fun with their kids without thinking why we are possibly going to be robbed of this gift.

What pains me more is that his face looks exactly like mine, so its like watching myself slowly die and not have any way to stop it.

[Dutch]

My thoughts and prayers are with you, gottimd. Be strong for your wife and child and hang in there.

[Bisbo]

Terrible news - so sorry to hear it.

[Icy]

I'm so sorry to read this mate, it sadly reminds me a lot what we past with our first baby, our loved girl Celia, 3 yeas ago, as the process was more or less the same.

We went for most of what are you are going in now, so i guess I can understand how you and your wife are feeling. From waiting impatiently every update from the doctors, to decide to give baptism to her when we weren't strong believers, to ask yourself "why us", to envy every parent in the hospital that had ill babies but not on life danger, to hate and want to hit every nurse or doctor that showed a smile when we were into that huge pain and anxiety.

No matter what will happen, this will make you and your wife a way stronger family, this is the hardest test you both can pass in life.

You are both in my wife's and my thoughts, keep strong and let's hope for the best. You know you can hit me on AIM anytime if you ever want to talk.

[gottimd]

Gavin Anthony passed away at 9:45am this morning. He was 3.5 days old. We got to hold him for quite some time after his heart gave out on him.

[oliegirl]

There are no words that express how sorry I am to read this.

[Draft Dodger]

I'm really sorry.

[Cuckoo]

Gavin Anthony passed away at 9:45am this morning. He was 3.5 days old. We got to hold him for quite some time after his heart gave out on him.

I'm so, so sorry, my friend. I wish I had the words to say that would offer any comfort at all. My most sincere thoughts and prayers go out to you and your wife, Seth. I'm just hurting for you guys.

I know that Gavin has had a profound impact on this world in such a short time, his strength filling the heart of so many, including my entire family.

[MrBug708]

:(

[Lathum]

so sorry Gotti, just so so sorry...

[Scoobz0202]

I'm crying and I don't even know you at all. I can't imagine the sadness and anger you have right now.

Prayers are with you and your wife.

[flounder]

I'm so sorry to hear that. Something similar just happened to one of my friends, and I know what she went through. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Chief Rum]

God bless Gavin Anthony.

I'm so sorry to hear this, gottimd. I am glad you both got the chance to hold him, and him to be held.

You and yours will be in my thoughts.

[gottimd]

I posted this in the NAFL but wanted to share here as well because of the prayers we received here as well....

Thank you for all of your support. It happened too fast this morning so we couldn't get him baptized (wife is catholic). In the Jewish faith it is customary to sit Shiva which is a week long mourning process. I have been given time off of work but I will be on the internet because this league brings me solace in bad times whether it be now or in times past.

I appreciate the fact that we are strangers by face and all of your prayers were as strong as any family member and friend. My little guardian angel will watch over us and will be united with his grandparents, Christopher (9/11), Anthony (wifes father), and all of our deceased pets.

We will meet again in due time, but not yet, where I can be a father to him. God had alternative plans and he was needed up above more than here.

Sorry to be so sappy, just wanted to express my appreciation for all of your support.

[Antmeister]

That sentence was very difficult to finish after the first few words. I wish you and your family well.

[Senator]

He fought so hard, I don't even have any words right now, I just feel tremendous sadness for all of you. I just don't understand things like this. Rest easy now, little guy.

[MacroGuru]

I cried, wife heard me and I showed her and she cried. You are in our prayers.

[NoMyths]

You and your family are in my thoughts, gottimd.

[saldana]

you and your family have every sympathy and prayer that i am capable of giving..i cant even imagine your pain...i have said this before, but if there is any solace you can take at this point, take it from the fact that your son knew nothing but love in his short time with you, and any memories he had in this world were of the undconditional love you and your wife gave him

[Eaglesfan27]

I'm so very sorry to hear this. You and your family will continue to be in my prayers.

[PackerFanatic]

I am very sorry, gott.

[Crim]

So sorry, gottimd. I pray that you and your wife will find peace with this at some point. Many here have gone through similar heartbreak, and hopefully we can lend you a little strength.

[Rizon]

:(

[CleBrownsfan]

I sat here thinking what to write but just to emotional to think of anything else but I'm so sorry :(

[gkb]

My wife asked me for an update first thing this morning, but I didn't get a chance to check until now. We're so sorry that you lost your son. We'll continue thinking of, and praying for, you and your family.

[terpkristin]

I'm crying and I don't even know you at all. I can't imagine the sadness and anger you have right now.

Me too. I'll be thinking of all 3 of you.

/tk

[Dutch]

I'm sorry, gottimd. God bless you and your family.

[Silver Owl]

Very sorry to hear this, you and your family are in our prayers.

[Icy]

Very sorry to hear, i'm in tears now both for your baby and ours that was 7 days old when died too. Your experience has brought us so sad memories. I hope they are now together watching for us somewhere.

Now it's time to get strong and to support each other, and it doesn't matter how broken your heart is, believe me, time and love heals it all and you both will be fine in the future. After you pass over all this together, your marriage will be as strong as most of couples can't even dream about.

Again you know my AIM, just message me if you need to talk.

[path12]

So, so sorry.

[Lorena]

Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry gottimd, I'm in tears right now as my heart breaks for you and yours :(

Please know I had little Gavin Anthony, you, your wife and your support system on my mind all of yesterday and today and will continue to do so.

[Maple Leafs]

Terrible news. All the best to you, your wife and family in this difficult time.

[Spree]

What pains me more is that his face looks exactly like mine, so its like watching myself slowly die and not have any way to stop it.

That's beautifully sensitive, gottimd, and touching. Watching your relatives die is like seeing your identity slip away, but I can't imagine what that must be like for an identity that you created.

[TCY Junkie]

I will continue to pray for you and your wife.

[duckman]

I can't express how devastated I am about learning about your loss, Seth. As a parent, I sometimes take for granted the wonderful gift of having a living breathing child in my life. When my son is at home, I sometimes shoo him away when I am busy and I feel the tremendous guilt of doing so right now. Tonight, I will say a prayer for you and your family and pray that I don't ever take for granted the gift that God gave to me. When I see Matthew tomorrow, I will hold him a little tighter. Thank you, Seth, for your strength and wisdom.

[TroyF]

:(

Words can't express what I feel for you, your wife and your family. I will continue to keep you all in my prayers.

[DaddyTorgo]

gah - this is what I miss by being out of town? holy fuck man...i'm sorry

[Kodos]

Life can be so cruel. I'm so sorry to hear of you and your family's loss. You'll all be in my thoughts. R.I.P. Gavin.

[Mrs. Schmidty]

So sorry to hear of your news. You and your family are in my prayers for support and healing.

[RomaGoth]

I am so very sorry for your loss, Gotti. My wife never even knew about this place until this thread came up, but yesterday I showed her your story and she cried. Today we mourned for you and yours. Rest assured that your little one is in a better place and he is just hanging out waiting for you to hold him again.

[JeeberD]

I'm so sorry, gottimd... :(

[Sweed]

gottimd and mrs. gottimd, I am so sorry to hear of your loss you will be in my prayers. My wife and I went through the same thing 24 years ago. Our first born, Janet, lived 19 hours in an ICU before her little heart gave out. I know to well your feelings of why and is something that never really goes away.

Seeing other couples with their babies was very hard for us also, you're happy for them while still hurting inside. The hardest thing for me and my wife was seeing other people with children that were neglected\ignored. You wonder why would God give these people a child when they obviously don't care about them and take ours? The answer never comes....

Over time the hurt lessened and our relationship became stronger. We went on to have two more healthy children. Our son is now a teacher and basketball coach while our daughter is getting ready for her freshman year of college. I pray that God will bless you in the same way.

[SFL Cat]

So very sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers are with you.

[Flasch186]

sorry man :(

[CamEdwards]

I'm so sorry, gottimd.

[Autumn]

I'm so sorry to hear this. I've done some work with parents in this situation, and I really recommend finding a support group. It's the sort of thing no one understands who hasn't gone through it, and those people can really help.

[gottimd]

Thank you all again for your continued support, prayers, PM's and IMs, etc.

Gavin is being picked up tonight by the funeral home and we are having him cremated so that he may be close to us at all times. We decided against the burial because we are not sure if we will be staying in this neighborhood or even close to the cemetary, so if we move he will move with us. The NICU staff hugged us this evening and gave us a box of all of his things and they are creating an album for us. They gave us footprints and handprints as well.

To close out this terrible time in our lives, we are having a private memorial service on Wednesday at a relatives house. My hope is that no one here ever has to go through something like this and I feel the pain that those who have gone through this situation.

[Celeval]

I'm so sorry. Our prayers are with you.

[Buccaneer]

Oh wow, I didn't see this until now. My heart is broken hearing this story. I pray for strength and peace, as hard as it is to accept.

Now I know why I didn't see this. My wife went into unexpected surgery on Friday. As stressful and anxious that was, it pales in comparison what you have been going through since Friday.

[King of New York]

I'm sorry about Gavin, gottimd.

[flere-imsaho]

I am so very sorry for your loss, gottimd.

[TLK]

Just saw this now. Horrible. You guys will be in our prayers.

[jeheinz72]

I'm so sorry gottimd

[digamma]

all my best. very sorry to hear this.

[MikeVic]

I read the last few posts, and then the first post... and I can't come to read the rest. :( Sorry. :(

[boberot]

Deeply and profoundly sorry about your loss.

I wish you strength and hope you can find some semblance of comfort as you grieve.

You will be in my family's prayers tonight.

[Telle]

I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family will continue to be in my thoughts.

[RomaGoth]

Thank you all again for your continued support, prayers, PM's and IMs, etc.

Gavin is being picked up tonight by the funeral home and we are having him cremated so that he may be close to us at all times. We decided against the burial because we are not sure if we will be staying in this neighborhood or even close to the cemetary, so if we move he will move with us. The NICU staff hugged us this evening and gave us a box of all of his things and they are creating an album for us. They gave us footprints and handprints as well.

To close out this terrible time in our lives, we are having a private memorial service on Wednesday at a relatives house. My hope is that no one here ever has to go through something like this and I feel the pain that those who have gone through this situation.

Once again I am very sorry for the pain you and your wife have had to endure during this difficult time. There is only so much one can say, especially not knowing you in person. I wish you the best.

[oliegirl]

Glad I wasn't the only one thinking of gottimd and his family today. I can't even imagine what they are going through, but it's good that he realizes how many people are here thinking of him and sending prayers and good thoughts his way.

[Lorena]

Yeah, count me as one of those ppl too.

[terpkristin]

Without a doubt, gottimd and his wife and little Gavin Anthony were on my mind today.

I never know what to say in this kind of situation, anything I can think of never seems "right," but I hope that today has brought at least a very small step towards your family's healing, and my thoughts will be with you.

/tk

[JPhillips]

All the best. This has to be a difficult time for you and your wife. God bless.

[Swaggs]

:(

[Ben E Lou]

Extremely sad follow-up news about this was passed along to me this evening, and I thought it best to make everyone aware of it.

washingtonpost.com: Death Notices (http://www.legacy.com/WashingtonPost/DeathNotices.asp?Page=LifeStory&PersonId=121837546)



<table width="100%" border="0" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0"><tbody><tr><td class="Large Heading TopPadSmall" valign="bottom" width="55%">Seth Aaron Gottesmann</td> <td width="1%">
</td> <td class="TopPadSmall" width="44%" align="right">
</td> </tr> <tr> <td colspan="3" class="Notice TopPadSmall"> <!-- SETH GOTTESMANN--> http://mi-cache.legacy.com/legacy/images/Cobrands/WashingtonPost/Logos/EMB249.jpg

GOTTESMANN SETH AARON GOTTESMANN Suddenly on Tuesday, December 23, 2008, SETH AARON GOTTESMANN of Gaithersburg, MD. Beloved husband of Nicole Gottesmann and devoted father of the late Gavin Anthony Gottesmann and loving son of Dennis and Amy Gottesmann; dear brother of Adam Gottesmann. Funeral services will be held on Friday, December 26 at 1 p.m. at DANZANSKY-GOLDBERG MEMORIAL CHAPELS, INC., 1170 Rockville Pk., Rockville, MD. Interment Judean Memorial Gardens, Olney, MD. Shiva will be observed at Dennis and Amy Gottesman's residence.
</td></tr></tbody></table>



Keep his wife in your prayers. I can't imagine going through what she has in the last 6 months.

[Cuckoo]

I was going to make a post on this in a couple of days, but it's been a difficult day for me. Seth was a major part of our league and, much more importantly, my life. I hope to have more articulate words at some point, but I all I can say now is that I will miss him terribly.

FOFC has lost a great friend.

[Eaglesfan27]

That is horrible. :(


His wife will be in my prayers.

[cougarfreak]

Oh man........this is awful. His wife will be in my prayers.

[wade moore]

Terrible, sad news.

Seth and the entire Gottesman family will be in my thoughts and prayers.

[Draft Dodger]

Rest in peace, Seth.

[FrogMan]

:(

RIP my friend...

[Radii]

oh wow, terrible :(

[lordscarlet]

Wow. My thoughts go out to his family, particularly his wife.

[DaddyTorgo]

Wow. I don't even know what to say. RIP Seth. Those you left behind will be in our thoughts.

[DaddyTorgo]

you can go online at the washingtonpost page and post to the sympathy guest book everyone.

[Karlifornia]

That is terrible. RIP gotti. :(

[DaddyTorgo]

says "suddenly" - do we have any idea what happened?

[Izulde]

Horrible news. :(

[stevew]

Oh wow. My prayers go out to his wife and family. Horrible news.

[sterlingice]

:( RIP and prayers for his wife

SI

[DaddyTorgo]

his AIM is still showing up as online on his phone. i know it means nothing, but it's...eerie :(

[Chief Rum]

Wow. My heart goes out to gottimd's wife and kids. Go with God, Seth. You have left your mark on this world.

[Swaggs]

:(

Shocking to see this post. I guess this community has been around for almost 10-years, so it should not be that surprising that we would lose someone from time to time, just as we do in our day-to-day lives, but this is a tremendous loss. :(

[st.cronin]

Wow, what a terrible tragedy.

[Flasch186]

no good....im so sorry

[miami_fan]

Shocking news indeed.

RIP Seth

[Lathum]

horrible.

I remember having conversations with him around tourny time with the pool he ran.

It is a shame. If anyone is ambitious enough to set up some sort of fund to help his family I would be happy to donate.

[Honolulu_Blue]

All the best to you, Seth. I hope wherever you are it's a good place.

It's weird. I don't recall ever really having a conversation with him on here and, clearly, I never met him, but yet I still feel a profound sense of loss and sadness at his passing.

[cuervo72]

Wow...rest in peace. That's way too young.

[RainMaker]

Way too young....RIP

[wade moore]

All the best to you, Seth. I hope wherever you are it's a good place.

It's weird. I don't recall ever really having a conversation with him on here and, clearly, I never met him, but yet I still feel a profound sense of loss and sadness at his passing.

I had discussions with him here, but not nearly as much as I have other posters - and I agree. Even though my activity around here has reduced of late, the sense of loss from this is very high.

[st.cronin]

It's weird. I don't recall ever really having a conversation with him on here and, clearly, I never met him, but yet I still feel a profound sense of loss and sadness at his passing.

+1

[lordscarlet]

horrible.

I remember having conversations with him around tourny time with the pool he ran.

It is a shame. If anyone is ambitious enough to set up some sort of fund to help his family I would be happy to donate.

I could probably take something by the gravesite if anyone is interested. If anyone was close enough to him to talk to his family, we could try to find out if there is a cause he supported (maybe in relation to his son?) or some other way that we could help in a time like this.

[flere-imsaho]

This is terrible, terrible news. His family will be in my thoughts.

[Cuckoo]

I'm in touch with the family. There will be a foundation for his wife and son, and I'll pass along the information as soon as I have it.

[DaddyTorgo]

I'm in touch with the family. There will be a foundation for his wife and son, and I'll pass along the information as soon as I have it.

Thanks Cuckoo.

[digamma]

Very sad. All my best to the family.

[Lathum]

I'm in touch with the family. There will be a foundation for his wife and son, and I'll pass along the information as soon as I have it.

thank you

[Maple Leafs]

Terrible news. My thoughts are with his family.

[samifan24]

This is terrible. My heart goes out to his wife and family.

[Sweed]

What a terrible tragedy, my heart goes out to his wife and family. They will be in my prayers. As others have already said, far too young...

[Buccaneer]

:( :(

[Skolleck]

My deepest sympathy for his family at this time of need.

As I said at my daughters funeral:

"I think that God weaves a tapestry with our lives, each life is a thread, and we never see the front of the picture. All we see is the back of the tapestry and the knots and the uglyness. I think we never see the real pictures until later. We all suffer the loss of a soul to our reality. That thread ends and we feel the void and move to close the gap. Some threads are dark and some are light. I feel you can choose to be a light or a dark thread. You help weave the tapestry everyday of your life. The choices you make are the bends in the threads. Sometimes you have no idea who you affect or change. It will all be part of the picture."

Godspeed my friend.

Scott Kolleck

[johnnyshaka]

Just another note about this tragedy...a week before his sudden death, gotti told us over at the NAFL that he and his wife had gone through the necessary procedures to conceive again and hopefully be able to carry the baby to term (or at least close to term). At the time, he was very excited to tell us that they were nearing the 13 week mark.

Just make sure you all kiss and hug your loved ones a little more often.

[DaddyTorgo]

Just another note about this tragedy...a week before his sudden death, gotti told us over at the NAFL that he and his wife had gone through the necessary procedures to conceive again and hopefully be able to carry the baby to term (or at least close to term). At the time, he was very excited to tell us that they were nearing the 13 week mark.

Just make sure you all kiss and hug your loved ones a little more often.


oh shit. :(:(:(

[Klinglerware]

Terrible news. Nothing more to say...

[Glengoyne]

...... clearly, I never met him, but yet I still feel a profound sense of loss and sadness at his passing.
I'll have to give the +1 here as well.

God's speed Seth. My prayers are with your family.

Many of us here hardly knew you, but you will be missed.

[Warhammer]

I don't know what to say aside from he and his family will be in my prayers.

[Senator]

great sadness......

[RedKingGold]

I had discussions with him here, but not nearly as much as I have other posters - and I agree. Even though my activity around here has reduced of late, the sense of loss from this is very high.

Yep. I remember him mainly from activity when I first started posting around here in 2002. Never had many direct conversations with him, but the fact that a death would have this much of an impact proves that there still is a community aspect to FOFC.

God's peace, condolences, and best wishes to the family.

[WSUCougar]

Dear God, what tragic news. Rest in peace, Seth.

[DanGarion]

:( Wow, my thoughts are with his family. Crazy when something like this happens.

[Groundhog]

Wow. Terrible news. :(

His family will be in my thoughts.

[Fonzie]

Damn that's awful. My heart goes out to the Gottesmann family.

[SunDevil]

Very sad. His family will be in my prayers.

[CU Tiger]

WOW.
I'll second the notion of the tremendous sense of loss of someone I never really "knew".

It was odd, because of some personal family issues I saw very little of this board in late July and totally missed this the first time around, saw the post tonight and started reading about Gavin for the first time....then to get to Ben's post at the end....wow.

God Speed.
If someone sets up a donation site PLEASE update us....

[Mustang]

My thoughts are with his family. :(

[Antmeister]

Damn...

[Lorena]

Oh man, so sad :( :(

[Pyser]

terrible. so sorry.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

My God...

I pray for his wife & family.

[Danny]

This is awful. My prayers are with his family.

[PilotMan]

What a terrible tragedy. I cannot even imagine the pain that his family is enduring. Just terrible news. My God bless his family.

[Northwood_DK]

This is just horrible news

RIP Seth

[Neuqua]

Wow.

Godspeed.

[Icy]

Ouch crap, terrible and really shocking news.

I had been talking a lot with him in the last months by AIM as we had in common the pain of loosing a baby. Then just a few weeks ago he messaged me to tell me about their new try for a baby and how happy they were.

When i saw this thread bumped i was 100% sure it was him giving good news about it and instead i found this :(

I can't express how sad and shocked i am right now, i'm so sorry for his family.

[SegRat]

Sad sad news

[Butter]

Don't know what to say. Terrible news.

[Logan]

So sorry to hear, and I'm also ashamed that I somehow missed this the first time around.

Best wishes and condolences to his wife and family.

[SirFozzie]

May God keep them both in his arms. The family is in my prayers.

[Mizzou B-ball fan]

Man.......right around the holiday season too. I only hope that his wife is able to carry a healthy baby to full-term. She deserves a positive life event at this point.

[Subby]

This is just unbelievably shocking news.

My thoughts and prayers go out to his family. :(

[Kodos]

No idea what to say. Really sad news. Life can be so cruel. R.I.P., Seth.

[CleBrownsfan]

Mizzou, that is exactly what I was thinking - very sad....RIP Gotti :(

[Toddzilla]

This is just unbearably tragic. Godspeed, good friend.

[Oilers9911]

Unreal. I too, do not remember ever exchanging messages with Seth. Regardless, it does make you more cognizant of the sense of community on a site like this when someone passes. I never met him, never knew him, never talked to him and yet I still feel sad and feel like I lost someone close to me.

Rest In Peace Seth, you can now be the father to Gavin that you always wanted to be. To his wife and his family, you are in my prayers.

[Qwikshot]

Really sad news.

[terpkristin]

Wow. I just logged on and saw this, I don't even know what to say.
RIP to one of our own.

:(

/tk

[BYU 14]

Terribly sad news. So much for one family to have endured over the past year. Rest in peace and may god watch over Seth's loved ones.

[Marc Vaughan]

Very very sad - sorry to hear that.

[sachmo71]

holy crap

[NoSkillz]

Words can't describe the sorrow I'm feeling for someone I only knew through the NAFL.

My heartfelt condolences to everyone who were friendly with Seth.

[Fidatelo]

This thread is terrible, I really feel for his family and friends :(

Did I miss what happened to Seth? I'm seeing posts saying people were speaking with him a week ago and that he was excited etc, so it doesn't seem like it was a known illness.

[jeheinz72]

RIP Seth

[DaddyTorgo]

This thread is terrible, I really feel for his family and friends :(

Did I miss what happened to Seth? I'm seeing posts saying people were speaking with him a week ago and that he was excited etc, so it doesn't seem like it was a known illness.

you didn't miss it. it hasn't been disclosed to us as of yet. the obit in the paper said "sudden" FWIW.

[Dutch]

Very sad to hear this. RIP... :( My thoughts and prayers...

[DaddyTorgo]

i know there are people closer to Seth than I was, but I think something that might be nice to do (as I read through the guestbook a bit i noted one of his friends saying they're putting together a book of stories/etc. for the baby) would be to go through Seth's post-history and download them all to a text file and make it available to his widow. i'm sure there might be things she doesn't want to know, or doesn't want the kid to know (and tbh i don't know how we'd deal with those posts), but there might also be nuggets of things that would make the kid feel closer to dad - discussions about his favorite songs or favorite movies, etc. I just know that if my father had passed away before I was born I'd be desperate for any scrap of info about him.

i am happy to volunteer if nobody else wants to, provided people think it's a nice idea...

[M GO BLUE!!!]

I looked up some of his last posts... It's so strange how you can just be going along like normal, obsessing over little things like the coming Terminator film. Then you're gone a couple days later. :(

[DaddyTorgo]

I looked up some of his last posts... It's so strange how you can just be going along like normal, obsessing over little things like the coming Terminator film. Then you're gone a couple days later. :(

Yeah. :(

[CleBrownsfan]

We will meet again in due time, but not yet, where I can be a father to him. God had alternative plans and he was needed up above more than here.


Here's hoping gottimd gets to finally become the father he dreamed to be...

[kingfc22]

Very sad news. Not what I was expecting when logging onto this site this morning. :(

[MIJB#19]

Wow. I'm feeling sorry for his family, espicially his wife.

[JediKooter]

Very very sad. My heart and condolences goes out to his wife and family and friends.

[Oilers9911]

The only thing that makes this remotely bearable is the image of Seth crossing over and the first thing he gets to do is hold little Gavin in his arms again. Lump in my throat just thinking about it.

[GrantDawg]

Loss of words. So sorry to hear this.

[DaddyTorgo]

The only thing that makes this remotely bearable is the image of Seth crossing over and the first thing he gets to do is hold little Gavin in his arms again. Lump in my throat just thinking about it.

+1. Maybe if there is a creator this was his plan.:(

[Lathum]

I looked up some of his last posts... It's so strange how you can just be going along like normal, obsessing over little things like the coming Terminator film. Then you're gone a couple days later. :(

makes you think.

Next time you get angry at your wife, kids, parents etc... keep in mind they may not be there at some point and is what you are fighting about all that important?

[BYU 14]

makes you think.

Next time you get angry at your wife, kids, parents etc... keep in mind they may not be there at some point and is what you are fighting about all that important?

Best advice ever!

[BrianD]

makes you think.

Next time you get angry at your wife, kids, parents etc... keep in mind they may not be there at some point and is what you are fighting about all that important?

I had this very thought after my father passed away. Fortunately none of the family had a final argument hanging over their heads, but it could so easily happen. Treasure the time you've got because you never know when it will end.

[King of New York]

The immensity of this tragedy is just...I don't even know what to say, except peace to his friends and family.

[gkb]

What a tragedy. My wife and I will be praying for his family and friends.

[Lorena]

My heart just aches for his wife. My thoughts are with her and the rest of his family and friends... just terrible news.

[MikeVic]

I did not expect this when I caught up in the thread. RIP. :(

[Cuckoo]

you didn't miss it. it hasn't been disclosed to us as of yet. the obit in the paper said "sudden" FWIW.

It isn't yet known to the family either. Results of the autopsy are due in any day now. Apparently, his wife returned home to find him, and they are guessing aneurysm, embolism or heart attack.

[Arles]

Terrible tragedy and there's really nothing you can say after seeing the events over the past year. RIP

[JeeberD]

Oh my god, how horrible! I can't believe it, and I feel so bad for his wife and family...

RIP, Gottimd

[QuikSand]

Terribly sad.

[saldana]

this is so horrible, i cant even imagine how his wife must feel...cuckoo, please let us know if/when/what we can do to help his family.

godspeed gottimd

[path12]

I'm sitting here with no idea of what to say. RIP. :(

[kcchief19]

It puts things in perspective. I never know what to say in a situation like this, but all day I've been having one of those days where so many of the little things that we obsess over in life go wrong and drive us up the wall. Yet as frustrated as I've been, I keep dwelling on Seth and this discussion and realizing that all the things that are annoying me today have no importance in the grand scheme of things.

Rest in peace.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Just speechless.

My prayer is that the family and friends are able to somehow find peace with this as soon as possible.

[ColtCrazy]

It puts things in perspective. I never know what to say in a situation like this, but all day I've been having one of those days where so many of the little things that we obsess over in life go wrong and drive us up the wall. Yet as frustrated as I've been, I keep dwelling on Seth and this discussion and realizing that all the things that are annoying me today have no importance in the grand scheme of things.

Rest in peace.


Well said. One of my main friends from high school just laid his father to rest. We realized that there were more of our parents that have passed on than were still alive. It really puts a lot of things in perspective.

My heart goes out to his wife and all the pain she must be going through. I agree with what someone said in that her current baby goes full term. If a cloud ever needed a silver lining...

[CamEdwards]

Wow. That is shocking. My heart goes out to the family, and Cuckoo, please do let us know about the foundation being set up.

[JPhillips]

I've read this thread a half dozen times today and I still don't know what to think. Why do some people go through such incredible suffering?

[EagleFan]

Sad, very sad indeed. :(

[SFL Cat]

Very sad news. Times like this make you realize how fleeting our time here can be, and that we should always make the most of it.

[RedHawk00]

I am deeply saddened and wish to pass on my prayers to his family.

[MacroGuru]

Definitely hit home and my prayers are with his family...All I know, I have hugged everyone in my family a few extra times today..

[kingnebwsu]

Thoughts with his family. Just unreal... :(

[jaygr]

Very tragic. My thoughts and prayers go out to his wife, family and friends :(

[Mike Lowe]

I never post in threads like these because I feel like it's none of my business, even to give my sympathies to complete and utter strangers.

However, I read the original story for the first time this evening and it actually made me cry. When I read that his son had died I couldn't believe it and my wife, lying next to me in bed, was shocked at the story too as well as my response to it.

When I finally came across the reason for this thread being bumped I just wanted to tear the paint off of my bedroom wall. My God, my God...this is such sad news and like all of the others, my prayers go out to the family and especially his wife.