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View Full Version : Let's goooooo Goldurnears - Prologue, Season 18


robbgmaier
03-25-2003, 08:42 PM
Gambling Scandal Rocks Hattrick!!!!

02/15/03 – Stockholm – Hattrick commissioner K. Hickst Hebal shocked the world today by announcing that a secret investigation had uncovered major rules violations by teams around the world. According to investigators, the players, coaches, GM’s, and even some referees were involved in fixing score outcomes in order to make a killing against the gambling books. The commissioner adamently refused to name names, but local league officials have already begun implementing emergency procedures to perserve the current season and attempt to restore the integrity of the league.

Hometown Hero New Owner of Goldurnears

02/16/03 – Morgantown, WV, USA – Local boy Rob "bg" Maier announced today that he had taken the reins of the newly reconstituted Goldurnears, member of division V.230 in the USA Hattrick league. The fallout of the world wide gambling scandal was felt here in the states as the entire V.230 division changed ownership, and all of the teams were purged of their players and even the rights to their home stadia. Scheduled to play their first home game in less than 24 hours, Maier had only this to say: “We’ve worked out a plan to play our first game at a local high school field. We’re blanketing radio, TV, and print with advertisments for the new team. With five weeks left in the season, we are only four points out of first place. Since everyone is starting from scratch, tomorrow’s game is obviously hugely important. One thing our fans can count on, we are not waiting for next year. We’re going for the trophy right now.” The local high school field holds only 7000 people, and even at the league mandated prices, team officials expect a near shutout under brilliantly sunny skies.

Goldurnears Surrender Two Late Goals, Hold on to Draw
Close to within 3 Points of League Lead

02/18/03 – Morgantown, WV, USA – Having thrown together a starting lineup from 17 players from the local semi-pro leagues, the Goldurnears moved out to a 3-1 lead in their first ever game. Fatigue got the better of them, however, and the Kingslayers stormed back for two second half goals to sour the Goldurnears home opener.
Oriol Villaver looks like he might be a star in the making, as he scored two goals and earned MoM honors for the home side. Urmet Halman scored the other Goldurnears goal.
The Goldurnears missed a goldurn opportunity to close on the V.230 leaders, as first place TOKERS lost. Now 3 points back with 4 games to go, the Goldurnears are still within range of the title, but not as close as they would have been had they held on to their second half lead. After the game, in his first press conference, coach David Reynoso had the following to say: “Obviously we have a lot of work to do, but the team and I talked in the locker room just a minute ago, and these guys are all fired up, ready to work, and ready to make a run at the trophy. We will be pursuring some veteren midfielders to shore things up and bring some experience to the team. In fact, I’ll be working on that tonight, along with "bg" so you’ll all have to excuse me as I have a lot of work to do.”
Several fans from among the 6899 who attended also had comments after the game. One gold and blue painted fan stated, “Damn! We were kickin’ their (expletive deleted) asses for most of the game! Still, we’re just (expletive deleted) stoked to finally have a team in the Hattrick league.”

Week 18.10

02/17/03, 01:00 HTT home v. Kingslayers (USA V.230, league) 3-3

6899 attended on a brilliantly sunny day

1st half possession – 53%
2nd half possession – 48%

MoM – Villaver
dog – Pischedda

midfield – disastrous (1)
right side defence – inadequate (5)
central defence – inadequate (5)
left side defence – inadequate (5)
right side attack – weak (4)
central attack – inadequate (5)
left side attack – inadequate (5)
total – 30 (31,32)

GK Sands – 2.0 (error)
WD Whittaker – 1.5
WD Tompkins – 1.5
CD Russo – 2.0 (error, yellow)
CD Halman – 1.5 (goal, yellow)
W Bosco – 1.5 [defensive] (shot)
W Dupree – 1.5
IM Bronson – 1.5 [offensive]
IM Pischedda – 1.5 [defensive]
F Villaver – 2.0 (2 goals)
F Colvin – 1.5
total – 18.0

Old Friends Begin New Rivalry
02/20/03 – Zeeland, Nederland – It turns out that Goldurnears first friendly wasn’t played in Morgantown, in West Virginia, or even the United States! While renovations were being made to the high school field that apparently is going to become their permanent home, childhood friend Flowi N. Ganus invited the Goldurnears to play in the Nederlands, where they were summarily crushed by a score of 7-1. There is little to talk about concerning the game, but there are various reports of the teams activities the day they arrived. FC Mind will be returning the favor by playing on our turf next week. Hopefully by then the team will have made some upgrades. Several new players are in fact expected to appear in the next fixture.

02/19/03, 17:30 HTT away v. FC Mind (finished 2nd VI.360 Nederland) F 1-7 F

1283 attended on a cloudy day

1st half possession – 45%
2nd half possession – 51%

MoM – Kociuba
dog – Bronson

midfield – wretched (2)
right side defence – inadequate (5)
central defence – inadequate (5)
left side defence – poor (3)
right side attack – inadequate (5)
central attack – inadequate (5)
left side attack – inadequate (5)
total – 30 (32,34)

GK Alonso – 1.5
WD Whittaker – 1.5
CD Russo – 2.0
CD Halman – 1.5
W Bosco – 2.0 (yellow)
W Dupree – 1.5
IM Kociuba – 2.0 (chance)
IM Bronson – 1.0
IM Pischedda – 1.0
F Dickey – 2.0
F Colvin – 1.5 (goal, yellow)
total – 17.5

robbgmaier
03-26-2003, 11:28 PM
Goldurnears Player Profile : Oriol Villaver

By Staff Reporter Bebec A. Kes

02/21/03 – Morgantown, WV, USA – This will be the first of a series of articles to introduce the new Goldurnears franchise to their fans. Oriol “Double Stuff” Villaver was working as a corporate lawyer when the call came from World Hattrick Headquarters in Stockholm. Oriol told us about his reaction. “I have dreamed of a career in professional soccer since the first time I scored a goal. I was thirteen, playing in a junior high school game at our new home field. I dribbled down the center of the pitch and delivered a perfect strike into the left side netting. The moment seemed to stretch on forever. Of course, at the moment I struck the ball, a sliding center back caught me square in the crotch. As I lay on the cold ground, seemingly near death, an angel appeared. It was our team trainer Holda M. Ibals. The pain was....well, anyway I’ve wanted to play in professional football for a long time, and have been biding my time as a multimillion dollar coporate attorney. If it wasn’t for the interns and the “freebies” from some of the clients, I don’t know if I could have kept my dream alive.

Rob “bg” Maier had this to say about the goldurn boy of the Goldurnears. “We seem to have landed a real star in the supplemental draft used to fill the teams in V.230. Double...er...Stuff is a solid scoring threat, having already scored twice in our first game. He does have a reputation as a bad boy, and isn’t shy about showing his emotions, even to the media. While this might seem to bode poorly for his future, I, frankly, admire his honesty. About to turn 25 years old, we hope that the rest of his career will follow the pattern of his initial appearance.” During our interview, bg seemed to indicate that there had already been some conflict between coach David Reynoso and his star striker. This reporter hopes to spend more time in the future delving into the personalities and fires that fuel this team.

robbgmaier
03-27-2003, 08:26 PM
GOOOOOOAAAAALLLLLL!!!

Goldurnears Overrun Ft. Worth Utd. 9-0

02/25/03 – Ft. Worth, TX, USA – Recent acquisition Joe Annand picked up 2.5 stars in the midfield and five different players scored goals en route to a stunning 9-nil victory against Ft. Worth United. Scoring included a hat trick by Ed “two feet” Dickey, two goals each by local cult hero Oriol “double stuff” Villaver and wing back Urmet “Dweezil” Halman, and single goals by recent pick ups Cato “houseboy” Nilsen and Stanislaw “Wolfgang” Kociuba in the midfield. Coach David Reynoso and owner Rob “bg” Maier picked up an entire 30+ year old midfield prior to last nights game, and the result was simply too overwhelming for Ft. Worth United to handle.

After the game, the mood in the locker room was exhuberant. “We are the kings of the world!” stated “double stuff”, obviously enjoying his Cristobal, not to mention chick flicks. Walking around shirtless, wearing a cheap tiara, “two feet” was singing a horrible rendition of “We are the champions” while two fisting cans of Budweiser. In the training room, the new old men of the team were just soaking in the hot tub, perhaps sitting a bit too close to one another. “What these guys lack in maturity, they make over many times in heart and desire,” remarked “Wolfgang”. Sitting back with their eyes closed and contented smiles on their faces, “houseboy” and “Dweezil” were, presumably, reflecting on the thrill of their recent victory.

The fact of the matter is, the only trouble the Goldurnears had tonight was in getting away from the arena safely. They had just messed with Texas after all. Local law enforcement followed them to the airport, perhaps having heard about the debaucherous tales during their recent trip to Zeeland. In the end, the team managed to escape and returned to Morgantown safely. Several adoring fans were at the airport in Morgantown to meet them, and replenish the teams’ dwindling alcohol supply.

With the other results of the week, the Goldurnears were now only one point out of first place in the division, as top team TOKERS could only manage a draw this week. Third place San Fransisco 69ers were only one point further behind. Next week Goldurnears play at home against the RipsClaws Avengers. By then, 3000 new seats will have been added to the high school field which, apparently, has become the Goldurnears permanent home.

Week 18.11

02/24/03, 01:00 HTT away v. Ft. Worth United (USA V.230) 9-0

7000 attended on pretty good conditions (partly sunny)

1st half possession – 66
2nd half possession – 82

MoM – Annand
dog – Dupree

midfield – poor (3)
right side defence – weak (4)
central defence – inadequate (5)
left side defence – weak (4)
right side attack – inadequate (5)
central attack – solid (7)
left side attack – inadequate (5)
total – 33 (36,39)

GK Sands – 2.0
WD Halman – 1.5 [middle] (2 goals)
WD Russo – 2.0 [middle]
CD Colvin – 1.5 [offensive]
W Dupree – 0.5 [middle] (assist, yellow)
W Bosco – 2.0 [defensive] (shot)
IM Nilsen – 2.0 (yellow, goal)
IM Annand – 2.5
IM Kociuba – 2.5 [offensive] (goal)
F Dickey – 2.0 (3 goals)
F Villaver – 2.5 (2 goals)
total – 21