"I'm Feeling Kinda Blue, Apu..." [Archive] - Front Office Football Central

Chief Rum

05-06-2009, 01:25 AM

...could you please get me one of those beers with candy floating in it?"

"I'm sorry, sir, I do not think that product exists. You must have dreamed it."

"Oh...well, then, can I please get a six pack of Duff and a bag of Skittles?"

Danny

05-06-2009, 02:32 AM

HAHA

Karlifornia

05-06-2009, 04:03 AM

If this becomes a thread for Simpsons quotes, I'm afraid I will not be able to refrain from quintuple dolaposting multiple times.

"There is no escape from the fortress of the Moles. Well, except that."

Peregrine

05-06-2009, 05:28 AM

Bart and Lisa need to do rock paper scissors to decide something -

Lisa thinks "Poor predictable Bart, always chooses rock."

Bart thinks "Good old rock, nothin' beats that!" then chooses rock and of course, loses.

Nugget699

05-06-2009, 06:08 AM

DENTAL PLAN!

Lisa needs braces.

flounder

05-06-2009, 06:39 AM

You know, a town with money is like a mule with a spinning wheel. Nobody knows how he got it, and danged if he knows how to use it!

Hehe. Mule.

Passacaglia

05-06-2009, 07:42 AM

Skittlebrau - Front Office Football Central (http://operationsports.com/fofc/showthread.php?t=13719&highlight=skittlebrau)

gstelmack

05-06-2009, 09:24 AM

D'oh!

A deer!

A female deer!

Ronnie Dobbs2

05-06-2009, 09:29 AM

WE'RE HERE!

WE'RE QUEER!

WE DON'T WANT ANY MORE BEARS!

MikeVic

05-06-2009, 09:32 AM

"Coffee!"

"Beer?"

"Coffee!"

"Beer?"

"C-o-"

"B-e-"

Kodos

05-06-2009, 09:56 AM

I regret nothing!

Neuqua

05-06-2009, 11:18 AM

Homer - "Hi, my name is Mr. Burns, and I believe you have some mail for me"
Postal Worker - "Ok Mr. Burns, what is your first name?"
Homer - "..I.. don't.. know..."

Cuckoo

05-06-2009, 01:07 PM

"Aww... maybe a hug will cork her cry hole."

RendeR

05-06-2009, 01:09 PM

This thread is SO 20 years ago.

Autumn

05-06-2009, 01:12 PM

Homer to Bart:
"We live in a society of laws! Why do you think I took you to all those "Police Academy" movies? For fun? Well, I didn't hear anybody laughing - did you?"

molson

05-06-2009, 01:58 PM

This thread is SO 20 years ago.

I don't think there's been a quote from this decade yet in this thread.

I still watch. It's not as consistent as it was in it's prime, but there's still the occasional great episode. It's definitely rebounded the last few seasons.

Autumn

05-06-2009, 02:00 PM

It's been about 10 years since I had time, or the TV reception, to watch the Simpsons, so I know I'm guilty of that.

sabotai

05-06-2009, 02:00 PM

This thread is SO 20 years ago.

:confused: What episode is that from?

Passacaglia

05-06-2009, 02:07 PM

"D'oh!"

CraigSca

05-06-2009, 03:36 PM

Love note from Homer that Marge keeps in her purse:

"Maybe it's the beer talking Marge, but you got a butt that won't quit.
They got these big, soft, chewy pretzels here.....bdughdsmdsd....5 dollars?! Get outta here!"

Peregrine

05-06-2009, 04:16 PM

Homer's work rules to live by:

If something goes wrong at work, blame the guy who doesn't speak English.

molson

05-06-2009, 04:29 PM

"I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to speed around the city,
keeping its speed over fifty. And if its speed dropped, the bus
would explode! I think it was called... "The bus that couldn't slow
down."

........

"It's like Speed 2, but with a bus instead of a boat!"

molson

05-06-2009, 04:35 PM

Here's a more recent one:

Ricky Gervais Character: Now, Homer, would you care to give your report on CSI: Miami?

Homer: Uh, okay. (Clears throat) There's this guy that got killed; I think it was in Miami, so CSI Miami investigatedededed; then a family said how much they love the Olive Garden; then I fell asleep. When I woke up, Letterman was talking to Alias...

tarcone

05-06-2009, 09:26 PM

Homer: Are you saying you're never going to eat any animal again? What about bacon?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Ham?
Lisa: No.
Homer: Pork chops?
Lisa: Dad, those all come from the same animal.
Homer: Heh heh heh. Ooh, yeah, right, Lisa. A wonderful, magical animal.

Love this one.

sterlingice

05-06-2009, 11:07 PM

That's definitely one of my favorites :)

SI

RainMaker

05-07-2009, 12:29 AM

"Everything's coming up Milhouse!"

Glengoyne

05-07-2009, 01:30 AM

"MonoRail"

Nugget699

05-07-2009, 02:04 AM

THRILLHOUSE!

Karlifornia

05-07-2009, 02:05 AM

AHAHHAHA! The dud looks just like you, poindexter!

Poli

05-07-2009, 06:02 AM

Alright Brain, you don't like me, and I don't like you. But let's just do this, and I can get back to killing you with beer.

Router Help

05-07-2009, 09:15 AM

"You'll Have to speak Up, I'm Wearing a Towel."

MikeVic

05-07-2009, 09:36 AM

AHAHHAHA! The dud looks just like you, poindexter!

That entire episode is probably my favourite one ever. Everything was hitting in that episode for me.

"Your mom is so cool. Mine would've been in here with TANG and rice krispy squares by now."

(Marge shown in the background doing a super fast 180 turn, holding TANG and rice krispy squares).

remper

05-07-2009, 10:16 AM

"How was jerk practice boy? Did they teach you to sing to trees and make crappy furniture out of useless logs?"

*chair Homer is sitting in collapses*

"Doh! Stupid poetic justice!"

Ronnie Dobbs2

05-07-2009, 10:37 AM

Gotta nuke something.
</pre></pre>

Chief Rum

05-07-2009, 01:09 PM

That entire episode is probably my favourite one ever. Everything was hitting in that episode for me.

"Your mom is so cool. Mine would've been in here with TANG and rice krispy squares by now."

(Marge shown in the background doing a super fast 180 turn, holding TANG and rice krispy squares).

That is a great episode. By and large, "Lisa" episodes suck, but I have always thought this one was probably the exception to the rule.

Millhouse's signature in Lisa's yearbook: "Hi Lisa, See you in the car! Millhouse"

"Celebrate your country's history by blowing up a small part of it!"

"Hey, look, Bart! It's Lisa! And she looks like Blossom!"

Ronnie Dobbs2

05-07-2009, 01:22 PM

By and large, "Lisa" episodes suck, but I have always thought this one was probably the exception to the rule.

Lisa the Vegetarian is definitely top 5 material for me.

"Go back to Russia!"

"The extra B is for BYOBB"

"No, I'd still rather not."

Troy: Come on Jimmy, let's take a peek at the killing floor.
Jimmy: Ohhh!
Troy: Don't let the name throw you Jimmy. It's not really a floor,
it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice
through so it can be collected and exported.
</pre>

MikeVic

05-07-2009, 01:33 PM

That is a great episode. By and large, "Lisa" episodes suck, but I have always thought this one was probably the exception to the rule.

Millhouse's signature in Lisa's yearbook: "Hi Lisa, See you in the car! Millhouse"

"Celebrate your country's history by blowing up a small part of it!"

"Hey, look, Bart! It's Lisa! And she looks like Blossom!"

"Can I buy some porno mags, a box of condoms, fireworks, oh and some panty shields."

"I don't know what you have planned tonight homer, but count me out."

sterlingice

05-07-2009, 02:34 PM

For some reason, the delivery of the "Sweet merciful crap! My car!" line at the end of Summer of 4 ft 2 always gets me.

SI

MikeVic

05-07-2009, 02:46 PM

I also love Homer's mannerisms when Flanders is talking to him at the beginning. He's rolling his eyes, motioning with his hand to speed up the conversation, etc.

And the ice tray with individual "fill me" sticky notes that even Marge finds over the top. And Rod/Todd's piggy bank with a "please don't steal from me" sticky note. Haha, just a high class episode.

hukarez

05-07-2009, 08:00 PM

"Krebapple? Ohhh... I've been calling her Krandel! I've been making an idiot out of myself!"

cthomer5000

05-07-2009, 08:40 PM

Homer: Okay, so this should be enough money to get me up in the air, have a frank talk with Marge, then maybe eat a deviled egg.

Pilot: Well, anything for a fellow Marine.

Homer: Yeah, Semper fudge.

Pilot: Uh, did you just say "Semper fudge"?

Homer: No, I said the right thing.

Chubby

05-07-2009, 09:00 PM

They're the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked.

Schmidty

05-07-2009, 10:36 PM

I used to love The Simpsons, but although a lot of these quotes bring some nostalgia with them, none of them really seem that funny anymore. Don't know why.

Qrusher14242

05-07-2009, 11:07 PM

Me fail english? thats unpossible!

kingnebwsu

05-07-2009, 11:40 PM

For some reason, the delivery of the "Sweet merciful crap! My car!" line at the end of Summer of 4 ft 2 always gets me.

SI

"Sweet merciful crap!" has made it into my regular vocabulary since this episode was on. I think it was like 13 years ago...wow. Good times :)

"This game is great and all I've done is enter my name...Thrillhouse!"

TV shows his name entered on-screen as "Thrillho"

EagleFan

05-07-2009, 11:51 PM

"I'll take one of those porno magazines... large box of condoms... a bottle of Old Harper... a couple of those panty shields... and some illegal fireworks, and one of those disposable enemas. Eh, make it two."

and of course Marge's later response...

"I don't know what you've got planned for tonight but count me out."

Chief Rum

05-08-2009, 12:53 AM

For some reason, the delivery of the "Sweet merciful crap! My car!" line at the end of Summer of 4 ft 2 always gets me.

SI

No, that doesn't even complete that one great moment, SI (and you're right, that's a great delivery). It must be completed by the instant shot of the car driving in a cloud of seagulls, with a seagull cry to punctuate it. :D

Haha, I did think about that but wasn't sure how to put it in "quote" form. Good pull.

Chief Rum

05-08-2009, 12:54 AM

Lisa the Vegetarian is definitely top 5 material for me.

"Go back to Russia!"

"The extra B is for BYOBB"

"No, I'd still rather not."

Troy: Come on Jimmy, let's take a peek at the killing floor.
Jimmy: Ohhh!
Troy: Don't let the name throw you Jimmy. It's not really a floor,
it's more of a steel grating that allows material to sluice
through so it can be collected and exported.
</pre>

You're right, this is a fantastic Lisa episode, too. There have been some winners. The problem is, it's hard to get The Jazzman out of your system (either one, heh).

Chief Rum

05-08-2009, 01:23 AM

sterlingice

05-08-2009, 08:38 AM

Not one of the better episodes tonight locally on the late night re-run, but still has one of the better lines:

Bart: "Why are we getting all dressed up, Mom? Are we going to Black Angus?"
Marge: "Well, you could say we're going to the BEST steakhouse in the WHOLE universe!"
Bart: "So...we're NOT going to Black Angus."

There aren't too many huge laugh out loud moments but there are quite a few worthy of a snicker: Larry King reading the geneologies, Homer's exchange with Ned about a BBQ ending with a satisfied "The joke's on him, I'll be dead by then", Homer's rendition of, ahem, "When the saints go over there", etc

I haven't watched an episode on tv in a couple of years at this point. It's so hit and miss and most stations, even in syndication, are playing the newer crap. But I do have trusty seasons 1-8 on DVD so it's all good.

SI

CU Tiger

05-09-2009, 04:23 PM

"Boy for Sale"

DaddyTorgo

05-09-2009, 04:32 PM

i never found this show as amusing as the majority of people apparently do

Chief Rum

05-09-2009, 05:58 PM

i never found this show as amusing as the majority of people apparently do

Man, you're just Captain Bringdown today. Hold on, lemme get my dog, you can kick it.

DaddyTorgo

05-09-2009, 06:10 PM

lol apparently i am. that's what everyone is saying. idk why

sabotai

05-09-2009, 07:25 PM

My Homer is not a communist. He may be a liar, a pig, an idiot, a communist, but he is not a porn star.

Karlifornia

05-09-2009, 07:29 PM

"Now, lets talk rust-proofing. These Colecos'll rust up on ya like that! Shut up, Gil, close the deal!"

kingnebwsu

05-10-2009, 04:39 PM

"Boy for Sale"

Jimbo: Is this legal, man?
Skinner: Here...and in Mississippi.

:)

MikeVic

05-10-2009, 08:35 PM

It's whisper quiet!

Wolfpack

05-10-2009, 09:14 PM

Willie: If elected mayor, my first act will be to KILL THE WHOLE LOT 'O YA, AND BURN YOUR TOWN TO CINDERS!

Stagehand: *whispers*

Willie: I know it's on!

Chief Rum

05-13-2009, 01:04 AM

Marge (to Santa's Little Helper): "Come on already, you have to go outside to do your 'business'!"

Homer: "Experts say, if you want animals to do anything, you first have to show them yourself."

Marge: "I'm not going to do that!"

Homer (sarcastic): "Well, SOOOOOORRRRRYYYY, your Majesty!"

(Probably funnier with delivery)

Peregrine

05-13-2009, 05:41 AM

I think this is my favorite Simpsons intro ever.

<object height="344" width="425">

<embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/faRlFsYmkeY&hl=en&fs=1" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" height="344" width="425"></object>

JAG

05-13-2009, 08:37 AM

Kodos: I am Clin-Ton. As overlord, all will kneel trembling before me
and obey my brutal commands. End communication.

...

Kent: Senator Dole, why should people vote for you instead of President
Clinton?
Kang: It makes no difference which one of us you vote for. Either way,
your planet is doomed. DOOMED!
Kent: Well, a refreshingly frank response there from senator Bob Dole.

Terps

05-13-2009, 10:55 AM

Hutz: Uh oh, we've drawn Judge Snyder.
Marge: Is that bad?
Hutz: Well, he's had it in for me ever since I kinda ran over his dog.
Marge: You did?
Hutz: Well, replace the word 'kinda' with the word 'repeatedly,' and the word 'dog' with 'son.'

Terps

05-13-2009, 10:59 AM

Welcome to the Knowledgeum, I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such automated information kiosks as Welcome to Springfield Airport and Where's Nordstrom? While you're enjoying our Hall of Wonders, your car unfortunately will be subject to repeated break-ins and...
Homer: What did he say? What about my car?

Hi, I'm Troy McClure. You may remember me from such other medical films as "Mommy, What's On That Man's Face?" and "Alice Doesn't Live Anymore".

Ronnie Dobbs2

05-13-2009, 11:00 AM

I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming!

Kodos

05-13-2009, 11:26 AM

I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming!

"Hot stuff, coming through!"

My favorite episode was the gay steel mill episode. But the Clinton-Dole election segment from the Halloween Special is right up there too.

Butter

05-13-2009, 11:46 AM

Maude: They were having S-E-X in front of C-H-I-L-D-R-E-N.
Krusty: Sex Cauldron? I thought they closed that place down.

Butter

05-13-2009, 11:53 AM

From when Krusty finds out he has a son:

"I'm not the kind of dad who does things, says stuff, or looks at you. But the love is there."

Bad-example

05-13-2009, 08:39 PM

I say "Son of a diddly!" on a daily basis.

Also, "I am Evil Homer" is on a constant loop in my brain and has been for many years. Sometimes it switches to "You don't win friends with salad."

Lastly, whenever someone wants my address I am always tempted to tell them it is 123 Fake Street.

MikeVic

05-13-2009, 09:14 PM

Chief Rum

06-02-2009, 01:27 AM

I love the Marge VS the Monorail episode.

***
Leonard Nimoy on the monorail: "A solar eclipse! And the cosmic ballet goes on..."
Guy seated next to him: "Does anyone want to switch seats?"

***

Marge on radio: "Homer! Homer!"
Homer: "Marge?"
Marge: "I think there's a man here who can help you!"
Homer: "Is it Batman?"
Marge: "No, it's a scientist."
Homer: "Batman's a scientist."
Marge: "It's not Batman!!"

Ronnie Dobbs2

06-06-2009, 06:44 AM

Lousy Smarch weather.

Kodos

06-07-2009, 12:16 AM

It started out like Romeo and Juliet, but it ended in tragedy!

General Mike

06-07-2009, 07:41 PM

From the credits of Bart Star

Scully, you're cut. Brooks, Groening, Simon, you're all cut. Castellaneta,
gone. Kavner, cut. Cartwright, cut. Smith, sorry, cut. Azaria, Shearer,
you're cut. Firestone, you're cut. So is Judge. Namath, you stay. All of
those people are cut. Johnson, Wolfe and Silverman are all cut. Goldfire,
O'Brien gone. Cut, Elliot, I don't know what you're doing here because
you're all cut. Pietela, Kuwahaha. Theres so many cuts here, look, I'll
just post them up and you see where your name is. Look how many cuts there
are there. Woah boy! You're cut. All of you! You're cut. I cut you!
[Gracie Films logo, "shhhhh"]
You're cut too, shusshy!

Peregrine

06-07-2009, 07:45 PM

Homer perusing their record collections:

"We don't have anything in common. Look at these records: Jim Nabors (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jim_Nabors), Glen Campbell (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Glen_Campbell), the Doodletown Pipers. Now look at her records! They stink!"