Online dating

[Galaxy]

I've never used them. I'm not looking too and it would just feel weird for some reason. However, I've always wanted to know if they are successful? Any experiences you want to share (and no, Ashley Madison doesn't count here).

[DanGarion]

I met my wife through Yahoo personals. She contacted me and we hit it off immediately. I had been using online dating off and on for well over 7 years till that happened.

[johnnyshaka]

This summer, a buddy of mine will be marrying somebody he met online. Guess it could work.

[rowech]

Wife and I will have been married 5 years in June off of match.com

[JediKooter]

Sorry, no advice from me. Though I did meet one girlfriend that was from an online trivia site on a local ISP. Worked out great until she moved back in with her husband.

I guess depends on where you live would depend on how easy it is to meet women. Probably harder to meet women if you were in Minot North Dakota as opposed to southern California whether or not you were looking online.

Good luck man. You should start a dynasty thread.

[Honolulu_Blue]

I did the Match.com thing many years ago. Back in 2001 or so when it was first starting. I had some success with it. A good friend of mine met a long term girlfriend on Match a few years ago.

I think it's a good way to meet people who have common interests and may potentially workout.

[Pumpy Tudors]

I met my wife online. The story is in my old "Face the Board" thread, which I imagine is somewhere on the board. It wasn't from a personals site or a dating site, but it was online, so I guess it fits the question asked here. I wasn't online trying to find a woman, but it just happened.

I consider myself lucky because I'm generally afraid of girls. :(

[Mustang]

Ordered... I mean, met my wife through an online dating site.

[spleen1015]

They're afraid of you, too.

[DanGarion]

I met my wife online. The story is in my old "Face the Board" thread, which I imagine is somewhere on the board. It wasn't from a personals site or a dating site, but it was online, so I guess it fits the question asked here. I wasn't online trying to find a woman, but it just happened.

I consider myself lucky because I'm generally afraid of girls. :(

A link to it is on the FOFC Wiki. Face the Board - FOFC Wiki (http://fofc.dangarion.com/index.php?title=Face_the_Board)

[Pumpy Tudors]

They're afraid of you, too.
I figured they were running up to me and stripping out of fear.

[hawk4669]

Met my wife Tiffany (Tiphnie here on FOFC) on old school AOL. Married 12 years, three great kids, and have the best marriage.

Cheers!

[gstelmack]

I know two couples who met online, one via a MUD (to date the occurrence) and one via an MMO (can't remember which one). Both are happily married.

[tarcone]

My sister-in-law met her current husband online and my wifes deadbeat (did i say that out loud?) dad met his current ex-wife/girlfriend online.

[CamEdwards]

Met my wife online as well (details in my FTB answers) and we've been married for going on 12 years.

[stevew]

Pumpy's better than us. He bagged a doctor.

[Galaxy]

I met my wife through Yahoo personals. She contacted me and we hit it off immediately. I had been using online dating off and on for well over 7 years till that happened.

What did she say? I wouldn't know what to say to someone.

[Sun Tzu]

Oddly enough, I just got married this last august. Where did we meet?

Hotornot.com...

...and yes, I beat those on the first night.

count it

[RendeR]

Telle and I met on a EW-TOO style chat system back in 95.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Online dating isn't much different from regular dating. It is all complete shit.

[Karlifornia]

I met my girlfriend on slutload.com. Well, she's not really my girlfriend. She's some 4'11" asian girl that does this kind of "vlog" where she receives bukkake at different world landmarks. My three favorite episodes are:

-Eiffel Tower Shower
-St. Peter's of Basilicone
-"Lemur!? I just met her": A Madagascar Bukkake Experience

[Logan]

JDate is the quickest path to easy sex ever.

[JediKooter]

I met my girlfriend on slutload.com. Well, she's not really my girlfriend. She's some 4'11" asian girl that does this kind of "vlog" where she receives bukkake at different world landmarks. My three favorite episodes are:

-Eiffel Tower Shower
-St. Peter's of Basilicone
-"Lemur!? I just met her": A Madagascar Bukkake Experience

Bukkake...the gift that keeps on giving.

[Galaxy]

Pumpy's better than us. He bagged a doctor.

He's bagged a lot.

[Galaxy]

Online dating isn't much different from regular dating. It is all complete shit.

I just wouldn't know what you say. You meet someone in person, you say hi and just go off the flow of the conversion. What do you say to someone online for the first time, "Hey, wanna poke each other?"

[SportsDino]

Nothing but bad experiences, but its probably close to any other dating scenario (i.e. the hardest part is just saying "hi" for shy folk).

Not as good as meeting in person, but if you are too afraid/unlucky/busy to get into those conversations, and you are on the ugly side (like me!) then I can guarantee you that you can go your whole life without a single opportunity coming around. So if the more remote nature of the internet gets you started it is pretty much a nothing to lose situation (well, ignoring cross dressing 50 year olds pretending to be college coeds for the moment).

My bad experiences probably have as much to do with my general incompetence and the insane weirdo women I met than how they were met (internet may make weirdos appear less often then they really appear, they should have a sticker on the internet for that).

[Groundhog]

I signed up once, like 5 years ago or so, but never really used it. Sent a few e-mails back and forth, but that was it.

A girl I know married a guy she met off an online dating site however, and they seem pretty happy. *shrug*

I think it's a good resource for people who just don't meet a lot of people of the other sex through work or socialising.

[Young Drachma]

I think it depends on your personality, to be honest. If you're not meeting people in other situations, then it probably makes sense. But otherwise?

[Izulde]

For me, it's far easier to meet people online, since I tend to be extremely shy in-person and a bit of a recluse on top of it.

Heh, even though I swore I'd never do an online relationship again, a situation's arisen where I may well be doing it again and it actually seems like it has potential to go somewhere.

In reality, it seems like the success rate/levels of happiness seem to be about the same as that of regular dating methods and I think that's better than the case was even 5-10 years ago as people have gotten more Net-savvy and some of the stigma of online relationships has worn off.

[jeff061]

I did match briefly, me being the epically reclusive introvert I am, just swapped some emails. The majority of the women's profiles read the same to me and nothing really sparked. I am also an alright looking guy(completely undeserving and wasted) and shallow as it may seem most the pics are never enough to get a good read. Good to bad and bad to good.

Guess I just can't get the read online that I can in real life. Which I rely on.

[Qwikshot]

I've never used them. I'm not looking too and it would just feel weird for some reason. However, I've always wanted to know if they are successful? Any experiences you want to share (and no, Ashley Madison doesn't count here).

I guess, and I haven't read any other postings yet, but are you considering online dating? Or are you asking simply out of curiosity?

I have online dated, so has my brother. My experiences varied, but I wasn't really impressed. My brother married a woman from the 'net (match.com) and they're expecting a baby this fall.

You'll find all varieties online from yahoo, to match, to eharmony, even craigslist and myspace have dating portions. So the question is, what are you looking for, something serious, something playful, or just testing the waters.

If you do decide to join one, make the effort to provide a picture, a good one, and don't go crazy on the description but at least make it something memorable.

Lastly, if you do send out notices, expect alot of no responses...and of course, this is also affected by how populated the area is that you live in.

Even after all of that, then you have the phonecalls or emails, then the dates...it's work and you have to stay on top. Plus if it's not working out, then you start from scratch again.

So I think that while there is a lot to look about e-dating, there is a lot of work to it.

[Galaxy]

I think it depends on your personality, to be honest. If you're not meeting people in other situations, then it probably makes sense. But otherwise?

Do you think people who go online are only looking for something more serious (not counting the causal sex sites and that)?

[jeff061]

I think its the same as real life, a mix, depends on the woman. I have a friend who achieved a short term sex frenzy from eHarmony. Not exactly what they are known for.

[Young Drachma]

Do you think people who go online are only looking for something more serious (not counting the causal sex sites and that)?

Depends on the site. But I tend to think so with some exceptions, yeah.

I think, that the real issue is about where you're own head is and what you're looking for. For me, I tend to do a lot better when I meet someone in person and spend lots of time with them, rather than meet them online. I found especially long distance online (or even if it wasn't) you can get into a situation where you're spending a lot of time talking and theorizing about who each other, rather than actually experiencing it. Not that it has to be that way. It was just my situation...among other reasons.

But I think if it's a situation where you just use the internet to widen your base, then it's no different than meeting someone at a bar or at work or whatever, without the awkwardness or whatever.

I think, again, it really depends on your personality and maybe your relationship history, more than anything having to do with the platform itself.

[Galaxy]

I think its the same as real life, a mix, depends on the woman. I have a friend who achieved a short term sex frenzy from eHarmony. Not exactly what they are known for.

I never understood the whole questions/chemistry thing with eHarmony. Seems like a pain in the ass and a rip-off (I rather just read a description of a person, what they like and don't like, and go from that point).

[Galaxy]

Depends on the site. But I tend to think so with some exceptions, yeah.

I think, that the real issue is about where you're own head is and what you're looking for. For me, I tend to do a lot better when I meet someone and spend lots of time with them and online, especially long distance you can get into a situation where you're spending a lot of time talking and theorizing about who each other, rather than actually experiencing it.




So would you ever meet them?

Seems like you could overcome your physical side more than you could in a bar/club (which I don't think are the greatest places to look for serious relationships in the first place).

[jeff061]

I never understood the whole questions/chemistry thing with eHarmony. Seems like a pain in the ass and a rip-off (I rather just read a description of a person, what they like and don't like, and go from that point).

My opinion is it's just all marketing BS. But they do ease you into the communication. If you are just not the type to drop emails cold online or you just want to get your feet wet with online dating, it's good for that.

[SFL Cat]

I've been married since before Algore invented the internet. :)

[Young Drachma]

So would you ever meet them?

Seems like you could overcome your physical side more than you could in a bar/club (which I don't think are the greatest places to look for serious relationships in the first place).

I don't meet people in bars/clubs, because I almost never go to them, so it's not really relevant to me at all.

I was being abstract and reflective to answer your question, not citing my current situation was all.

[Fidatelo]

In college I went on a date with a girl I met on a local Winnipeg IRC channel. It was cool, we had some coffee and then sat outside the place after while she had a smoke in the back lane. Then she said something and I laid out the greatest pick up line of my life: "Huh? Wha?" As I finished the 'wha' she gave me a sweet kiss in that there back lane. That line must have seemed irresistible when mixed in to the lovely back drop of garbage cans and garage doors. Then she went home and we talked on the phone once or twice and I can't recall why it trailed off.

That is my entire online dating experience, and I grade it a solid A.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

One thing I have noticed is expectations seem to be higher on the internet. You get women who are cows expecting nothing less than Adonises and men who are pigs expecting supermodels. In the real world we tend to accept flaws more readily, as in "Well... she's kinda cute, but it would be nice if she didn't have that conjoined twin. Oh, what the hell it's mine for the taking!"

[Galaxy]

One thing I have noticed is expectations seem to be higher on the internet. You get women who are cows expecting nothing less than Adonises and men who are pigs expecting supermodels. In the real world we tend to accept flaws more readily, as in "Well... she's kinda cute, but it would be nice if she didn't have that conjoined twin. Oh, what the hell it's mine for the taking!"

Interesting point. One thing I've noticed dating now is that expectations just seem way too high from women. I have some friends who are at the point where they are tired of dating and sort of "leaving the market".

[klayman]

I once dated a girl I met online. Had to end the relationship though. Every time I turned on the computer she thought I was cheating on her.




/not a true story

[lighthousekeeper]

I once dated a girl I met online at the DMV



/not a true story

[hhiipp]

I once dated a girl.

/not a true story

[terpkristin]

If I'm not mistaken, Schmidty met his wife through match.com or eharmony.com or something some such.

Never done the online thing, though I keep meaning to. Now that I'm out of school and I didn't find "the one" and it seems highly unlikely I'm going to meet him at work, I don't really know where else to turn to. Alas, every time I think of doing it, something else comes up to distract me. That's it, tomorrow I'm doing it.

/tk

[BreizhManu]

why not today ? :D

Did it a few months ago, results were meh, might give it another try.

[Butter]

Tomorrow? It's 8 in the morning, how about today.

I met my wife online as well about 12 years ago, we've been married nearly 11 years.

[nZane]

Met my fiancee on PlentyOfFish and have two friends who both met their significant others online as well. As has been said, meeting people online is just another method to use nowadays. Some people meet at bars, some at school, some at work, and some online.

[DanGarion]

What did she say? I wouldn't know what to say to someone.

She saw a picture of me that I had posted which was of me dressed as a Marine that was shot in the head for Halloween. She actually messaged me on Yahoo Messenger (since you can do that through the personals) and I was in Vegas at the time. I messaged her back that I was in Vegas and I would get back to her once I got back. So when I got home I talked to her online that night and just about every night after that till she asked me if she could call me. She was very forward, which is funny because my wife isn't a forward person. She just was really interested in this guy with the Halloween picture.

[mh2365]

I had more positive than negative experiences with on-line dating ... met my wife through (one of the positives LOL)

[Galaxy]

She saw a picture of me that I had posted which was of me dressed as a Marine that was shot in the head for Halloween. She actually messaged me on Yahoo Messenger (since you can do that through the personals) and I was in Vegas at the time. I messaged her back that I was in Vegas and I would get back to her once I got back. So when I got home I talked to her online that night and just about every night after that till she asked me if she could call me. She was very forward, which is funny because my wife isn't a forward person. She just was really interested in this guy with the Halloween picture.

So do you think the key is just to comment on a picture or a piece of information in their profile? What if you might not their "likes" in terms of physical attributes (I notice girls all want the athletic, 6'2'' guys), but they sound like they are looking for something real?

[sachmo71]

The deeper profile process of Eharmony and Chemistry.com compared to Match is supposed to make your matches more accurate bases on increased factors. This is why those sites pick your matches for you.

The conventional wisdom that I hear from users is that the photo is the most important part. Really it all comes down to honesty, though. If you want to be sure that a girl is compatible with you, then you might scan her profile to find out if you are alike on many issues. but if she is someone you find very attractive from a picture, you might be willing to take a chance if your likes and dislikes are further apart.

[DaddyTorgo]

I signed up once, like 5 years ago or so, but never really used it. Sent a few e-mails back and forth, but that was it.

A girl I know married a guy she met off an online dating site however, and they seem pretty happy. *shrug*

I think it's a good resource for people who just don't meet a lot of people of the other sex through work or socialising.

my oldest friend (to the point i consider her more like a sister than a friend) met her husband on eharmony and they've now been married...2 years?

She keeps suggesting that I try it.

[DaddyTorgo]

i on the other hand had some girl answer an ad i put on yahoo personals years back when i was in college who ended up being the older sister of one of my sister's guy friends. we met for coffee...i found her...not very desireable physically, and also frankly somewhat unintelligent, so it was a no-go.

I did eharmony for a short while. My problem with eharmony was the way it forces you through a very artificial series of steps before you can freely communicate with the person, and the other person can cutoff communication at any point without giving a reason. i'd see someone that looked interesting but just not want to go through the hassle of all those stupid steps that really didn't tell you much.

frankly i think they just had them to keep you signed up for longer and keep you generating revenue for them

[DaddyTorgo]

I found especially long distance online (or even if it wasn't) you can get into a situation where you're spending a lot of time talking and theorizing about who each other, rather than actually experiencing it.



WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER

bitch

[DaddyTorgo]

yeah

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Something that I've come to find in the whole dating thing is that I intensely dislike the process of getting to know someone. I find it to be complete B.S. I have a woman who called me last week that I have yet to call back. Met her at a bar where her drunk friend zeroed in on me, then she came in to rescue her friend from this guy who could have easily taken advantage of her. 1st girl left without saying bye & I somehow got the number of second. Called her once and talked for a few minutes. Before it got to the point where it was awkward she had to go. Now what? I have no clue what to say if I call other than "How's the drunk friend that was grinding into me, kissing my neck & told me she loves to be dominated?"

[chesapeake]

My best friend met his wife through match.com. It'll be 2 years next month. He dated 3 or 4 other women through match before meeting her, but none seemed like the right one to him. They clicked right from the start -- even if it took her the better part of a year to realize it.

[MikeVic]

With eharmony, you can "fast track" communicate... which means messages from the start I think, instead of those steps. I tried them for a couple months but after the initial influx of matches, got a bunch of crap. And whoever said it above regarding the picture being the most important... that's completely true. And I hated that I resorted to that too, since I'd rather just meet a person face-to-face to judge their personality and physical beauty like that. A picture isn't always good, and sometimes it's too good. :p

[Galaxy]

With eharmony, you can "fast track" communicate... which means messages from the start I think, instead of those steps. I tried them for a couple months but after the initial influx of matches, got a bunch of crap. And whoever said it above regarding the picture being the most important... that's completely true. And I hated that I resorted to that too, since I'd rather just meet a person face-to-face to judge their personality and physical beauty like that. A picture isn't always good, and sometimes it's too good. :p

So basically, if your ugly, your screwed even more. :)

[jeff061]

Just shade your photo black and white and look up into the camera. Works everytime.

[RendeR]

So basically, if your ugly, your screwed even more. :)


Isn't that the reality of things anywhere though? HUman beings are amazingly shallow and base far too much on first impressions and physical appearance. I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

[Galaxy]

Isn't that the reality of things anywhere though? HUman beings are amazingly shallow and base far too much on first impressions and physical appearance. I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

Oh I agree with you. Was making a bit of a joke.

[Lathum]

I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

Oh I agree with you. Was making a bit of a joke.

I agree with you also.

[Julio Riddols]

I met 2 ex gfs online, and wouldn't trade the experiences for anything. It was more a matter of being too young and not being ready for long term relationships that stopped marriage from being a part of those. I'd recommend it for someone who is more interested in substance than just a pretty face, but pay sites are pretty hit or miss on this.

Seems easier to browse around myspace or plentyoffish.com for someone if you fall in the general age group that frequents these sites.. Older people will probably have more luck with eHarmony and the like. My experience there was limited to girls from 18-25, so I figure I probably didn't get anything but desperate girls who werent on there for any reason other than resolving their desperation. I figure the older crowd, post college, etc.. Probably has other motives for being on there (lack of time, not into the bar scene) which would probably result in better overall options.

[Telle]

Isn't that the reality of things anywhere though? HUman beings are amazingly shallow and base far too much on first impressions and physical appearance. I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

Oh bull.

[DaddyTorgo]

Oh bull.

bah - i was looking forward to a comedic response from you to his post, not a serious one

[finketr]

does it count if i met my wife of 3 months (holy shit, must pick up something special for her) through friends that got together online?

me -> my friend from volleyball -> his now-wife he met online -> my wife.

[hhiipp]

Oh bull.

You can say this now, but his ugly ass will never believe you.

[DaddyTorgo]

does it count if i met my wife of 3 months (holy shit, must pick up something special for her) through friends that got together online?

me -> my friend from volleyball -> his now-wife he met online -> my wife.

i vote...that counts 50%

[Galaxy]

does it count if i met my wife of 3 months (holy shit, must pick up something special for her) through friends that got together online?

me -> my friend from volleyball -> his now-wife he met online -> my wife.

We need a flere diagram for that.

[Galaxy]

She saw a picture of me that I had posted which was of me dressed as a Marine that was shot in the head for Halloween. She actually messaged me on Yahoo Messenger (since you can do that through the personals) and I was in Vegas at the time. I messaged her back that I was in Vegas and I would get back to her once I got back. So when I got home I talked to her online that night and just about every night after that till she asked me if she could call me. She was very forward, which is funny because my wife isn't a forward person. She just was really interested in this guy with the Halloween picture.

How long did it take for you two to actually to meet?

[DanGarion]

How long did it take for you two to actually to meet?

One again, she was the one persistent on that as well. If I remember correctly she messaged me online on like the 7th, we first talked on like the 10th or 11th and then met at Deidrich's Coffee on like the 20th I remember that because it's one week between each of our birthdays.

[Galaxy]

Isn't that the reality of things anywhere though? HUman beings are amazingly shallow and base far too much on first impressions and physical appearance. I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

Here you go......I won't be making the cut. :)

Dating site for beautiful people rejects 1.8mil applicants (http://thestar.com.my/news/story.asp?file=/2009/11/10/nation/20091110122144&sec=nation)

[SportsDino]

Haha, the world is certainly that shallow. My experience though is that 'beautiful' people can often turn out to be the ugliest you will ever meet.

In my recent experience (since I'm trying online since I've met all of two girls in reality, had them approach me, and that off pure luck that I was in a hilarious moment, and its been a desert since):

As for online dating, it seems the girls always write 'tall dark and handsome' in their profile, despite themselves being short, fat, and ugly... :)

As in I had a 5 foot girl tell me her height range starts at 5'10" and she prefers 6 foot or higher. I still did my polite gentlemen routine (actually thats all I got, other than raging idealist!) but she was so shallow I couldn't stand to talk with her after a while. I throw out the pictures, since I figured it would get it over with right away (since I climbed the ugly tree as a child too often), hers were not all that great, and all of the sudden she is trying hard and I'm still trying to retreat.

So I guess, take the profiles with a grain of salt, girls always write one thing and do another. For instance, all the nonsense about wanting a serious guy, you can throw that out the window, at first all they want to do is play around and that 'serious stuff' is just fluff because they are still upset about their last boyfriend being an ass.

But ya, I put up an ad, out of the 20 some responses (I took it down quick), about 15 were spam/scammers, of the other 5 I got:
- girl who seemed nice but can never get ahold of (probably done)
- shallow girl described above (certainly done)
- one who seemed like a real person but never responded back (saywha?)
- a chat buddy (PhD student not looking for love, I did put in my ad just looking for new friends because I'm tired of hanging with male computer nerds and brokers entirely)... who nonetheless keeps asking relationship themed questions amongst rants on social
- a girl I get along with and find cute and can't stop talking with.

So I'd say online is worth a shot, but its like low percentage. A LOT of work with maybe 5% or less being worth more than a couple days of interest. If you actually look hot your results may be better.

I'm half tempted to make this into a dynasty... my love life does tend to be hilariously awful.

[Izulde]

Do make a dynasty of this! The last one at least seems promising. :D

[Galaxy]

Do make a dynasty of this! The last one at least seems promising. :D

+1
What he said......

[Dr. Sak]

So I guess, take the profiles with a grain of salt, girls always write one thing and do another. For instance, all the nonsense about wanting a serious guy, you can throw that out the window, at first all they want to do is play around and that 'serious stuff' is just fluff because they are still upset about their last boyfriend being an ass.

But ya, I put up an ad, out of the 20 some responses (I took it down quick), about 15 were spam/scammers, of the other 5 I got:
- girl who seemed nice but can never get ahold of (probably done)
- shallow girl described above (certainly done)
- one who seemed like a real person but never responded back (saywha?)
- a chat buddy (PhD student not looking for love, I did put in my ad just looking for new friends because I'm tired of hanging with male computer nerds and brokers entirely)... who nonetheless keeps asking relationship themed questions amongst rants on social
- a girl I get along with and find cute and can't stop talking with.

So I'd say online is worth a shot, but its like low percentage. A LOT of work with maybe 5% or less being worth more than a couple days of interest. If you actually look hot your results may be better.

I'm half tempted to make this into a dynasty... my love life does tend to be hilariously awful.

I've had similar experiences to you with online dating. I tried it for 3 months and ended up meeting 2 girls. The one was really nice, a single mom. But our schedules never worked out. The other was just batshit insane.

Your dynasty idea is quite intriguing since I've thought about doing the same, but i figure most of you don't need to read about how boring and pathetic my love life is and the fact that I am extremely picky!

[Galaxy]

What site did you use Dino?

[Lathum]

The whole process seems horrific and alien to me.

[Swaggs]

I've had similar experiences to you with online dating. I tried it for 3 months and ended up meeting 2 girls. The one was really nice, a single mom. But our schedules never worked out. The other was just batshit insane.

Your dynasty idea is quite intriguing since I've thought about doing the same, but i figure most of you don't need to read about how boring and pathetic my love life is and the fact that I am extremely picky!

I don't think you understand what the word picky means.

[Kodos]

The whole process seems horrific and alien to me.

And what is wrong with alien?!:mad:

[Rizon]

Met my ex-wife online and some other crazy ass GFs online. I would only recommend online dating to an enemy.

I tried it again after my divorce, out of masochism I suppose, and it was like fucking my own ass with my feet.

I met my current girlfriend (an actual human encouter) a couple weeks after canceling all my subscription to online dating sites.

[TCY Junkie]

So I guess, take the profiles with a grain of salt, girls always write one thing and do another. For instance, all the nonsense about wanting a serious guy, you can throw that out the window, at first all they want to do is play around and that 'serious stuff' is just fluff because they are still upset about their last boyfriend being an ass.



This one girl didn't really dwell on it but said she always goes out with the biggest players. It shouldn't be surprising since her favorite player is TO. After finding that out I told her I could only be friends. Girls seem to have a mind of their own and now she's more entertaining in her emails and we're go bowling. Hopefully she knows I'm serious about hating TO and we can only be friends.

[SportsDino]

I started a dynasty in the dynasty forums, i actually think my life is beyond boring, but it may be theraputic, either to me to get it all out, or to you to read about an EVEN BIGGER LOSER THAN YOU COULD POSSIBLY BE!!!

I'm not particularly sold on online dating based on historical results, but its a way to get your foot in the door. If you work in computers, honestly, how often do you come into contact with available women? I can go days without seeing a member of the fairer sex, and those I do are all married! The bar scene I can't even fathom (maybe if I actually had some looks), and to be honest I'm not the type that just walks up to people anyway. I give people their space by habit.

I actually posted on craigslist, in the past I used a college forum personals system. Craiglist had a very high scam ratio, if it were not for two girls I would never give it a try ever again and leave it just for furniture.

I'd basically avoid any response that is too 'sexual' in nature, unless you are somehow posting naughty to begin with. Heck, even had a webcam girl pretend to be a real one which threw me for a loop.

I haven't tried eHarmony or Match.com, but I'd be willing to give it a try after too many more flameouts. I'm giving a fair shot to the current person I met online (met her face to face for about 40 minutes, so she is not a 50 year old man or 12 year old boy or cop at least). I might try the whole 'go someplace I usually don't hang out and smile a lot' routine again, although my smile tends to scare women and small children (and well shoot, I probably terrify the shit out of most men smaller than a football player if I got my serious face on).

Dating is rough if you are not handsome and too courteous, you sorta need to interject yourself into a girl's life for them to notice you. You can go the rest of your life without EVER being flirted with or hit on by ANY girl, yet alone a nice or good looking one. They only reserve that action for guys they think need chasing...

[lynchjm24]

If having sex with fat girls is up your alley you will really enjoy match.com.

[Young Drachma]

OKCupid is free and I know a few females who seem to think it's great if nothing else for just a diversion.

[Galaxy]

Met my ex-wife online and some other crazy ass GFs online. I would only recommend online dating to an enemy.

I tried it again after my divorce, out of masochism I suppose, and it was like fucking my own ass with my feet.

I met my current girlfriend (an actual human encouter) a couple weeks after canceling all my subscription to online dating sites.

Crazy ass girls exist offline as well. :(

[Galaxy]

If having sex with fat girls is up your alley you will really enjoy match.com.

I've check out match.com. I find it funny how women describe themselves in terms of how old they are or what their body type is.

[Lathum]

I'm not particularly sold on online dating based on historical results, but its a way to get your foot in the door. If you work in computers, honestly, how often do you come into contact with available women? I can go days without seeing a member of the fairer sex, and those I do are all married! The bar scene I can't even fathom (maybe if I actually had some looks), and to be honest I'm not the type that just walks up to people anyway. I give people their space by habit.



It sounds to me like you need more confidence then anything else, you would be surprised how many women are more impressed with a guy who is confident in himself as opposed to how he looks. There are other ways to meet women. Church, join a co-ed sports league, take a class of some sort, etc...

[Kodos]

Have you tried stalking yet?

[Karlifornia]

LOL....my roommate is on the bigger side..and I open up her laptop to get on here..and guess what her number one viewed site is? Match.com, baby!

I've never tried the online dating, and I hope I never feel lonely and desperate enough to. For me, it's like religion. If helps you live a happy life, then great. It just ain't for me, though.

[cuervo72]

I'm not particularly sold on online dating based on historical results, but its a way to get your foot in the door. If you work in computers, honestly, how often do you come into contact with available women? I can go days without seeing a member of the fairer sex, and those I do are all married! The bar scene I can't even fathom (maybe if I actually had some looks), and to be honest I'm not the type that just walks up to people anyway. I give people their space by habit.

[snip]

Dating is rough if you are not handsome and too courteous, you sorta need to interject yourself into a girl's life for them to notice you. You can go the rest of your life without EVER being flirted with or hit on by ANY girl, yet alone a nice or good looking one. They only reserve that action for guys they think need chasing...

Pretty much, yep. I too work with computers, am courteous, not very handsome, and don't typically approach people; were I single rather than married, I'd probably have a pretty hard time meeting someone too.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

I think dating online is great, so long as you never, ever, ever meet the psycho in person.

[SportsDino]

Haha, the psychos scare away people from meeting with anyone. I think they actually go around and power-date using these sites, so the likelyhood of encountering a psycho is so high because they are the most active people in the population, but of course the observed effect is that the entire population is psycho!

I tend to extensively talk to someone before meeting them (and I've met maybe 10 in my whole life, only 7 as potential dates at all, and got gf 1 and gf 2 that way). I'm a lot more careful in my questioning, I've found there are a few questions to filter out the personality type (in general) of who you are talking to, I'll have to make a section in my dynasty for it!

-----

I rarely meet someone completely new in person, it very rarely happens to be a woman though for one. I got one date through soccer, which had the unfortunate side effect of making me appear more athletic than I am. Yay coed, my only female contact for months on end, lol, usually trampling me, but I'll take it. Girl was roughing me up the entire game, which encouraged me to get into funny (and cocky perhaps???) mode, which got a few laughs and a number without me really trying.

So confidence is a tricky thing, I have never, ever, walked up to a person and said 'hey baby lets date' (or anything far smoother than that). i just sometimes get a moment where I'm clever and feeling good and 'bam' if a girl is in the vincinity I have a small probability of landing a shot! Same with my last girlfriend, doing stuff, feeling confident, smiling for no reason in particular, and manage to say a few smart things when someone says hi and I'm in like sin.

But how the hell do you bring that up on call? Heck, in every case I've had a girlfriend that was not online, I never made the first move, I'm just a luckball (or bad luck considering every girl who went after me dropped me later! :lol: )

Online dating, I already got a hook in the girl because she has read so many of my stupid thoughts that she is curious. If you are bad at physical moments you might as well play to whatever strength you do have to have half a shot.

I'd have to agree most of online dating world seems to be more desparate on the spectrum, but really what do you expect? Everyone knows 'beautiful' people get hit on regularly by the opposite sex... don't need to advertise in alternative ways when you got a big beautiful billboard around you everyday! Just need to walk outside and you attract customers.

[lynchjm24]

I did this whole thing for fun for about 2 months. I cast a wide net because I'd rather just go meet someone for a few drinks then spend a month sending boring emails back and forth to each other trying to make yourself look cool.

So I probably met 15 women in that time. I have some funny stories and while I didn't end up with any of them for any kind of long term, some of them weren't bad to hang out with.

The thing I hated most was that I live in such a small area that I'd go to work and people would tell me I had gone out with someone that their friend. I didn't like the work and personal life colliding. To me that was the downside. Going out on a few dates with some psycho isn't all the big of a deal and can actually leave you with a lot of good stories for happy hour.

The ease of sex is no joke. If you have a sudden desire to sleep with a lot of women who are moderately attractive there is no faster way then online dating, targeting girls in their late 20's and early 30's. I probably slept with 40% on the first date and probably 2/3rds by date 3.

[SportsDino]

I think sex is pretty easy to get to if that is what you are looking for.

I think my stats are:
2/7 = eventually sex after becoming a girlfriend
3/7 = implied that sex was highly possible
1/7 = we got drunk and made out, but I'm too tame
1/7 = she was only looking for sex and I backed away (I posted on this in my dynasty)

That counts only girls I physically met, obviously you need to meet before you can simulate procreation, and after that last seventh which was early on, I actually was putting out signals to avoid getting it on until after getting to know them. I think getting to sex is pretty easy if you have at least moderate charm (and match up in the looks range reasonably well).

[Galaxy]

I did this whole thing for fun for about 2 months. I cast a wide net because I'd rather just go meet someone for a few drinks then spend a month sending boring emails back and forth to each other trying to make yourself look cool.

So I probably met 15 women in that time. I have some funny stories and while I didn't end up with any of them for any kind of long term, some of them weren't bad to hang out with.

The thing I hated most was that I live in such a small area that I'd go to work and people would tell me I had gone out with someone that their friend. I didn't like the work and personal life colliding. To me that was the downside. Going out on a few dates with some psycho isn't all the big of a deal and can actually leave you with a lot of good stories for happy hour.

The ease of sex is no joke. If you have a sudden desire to sleep with a lot of women who are moderately attractive there is no faster way then online dating, targeting girls in their late 20's and early 30's. I probably slept with 40% on the first date and probably 2/3rds by date 3.

Not bad for an old white man.

[lighthousekeeper]

I think sex is pretty easy to get to if that is what you are looking for.

I think my stats are:
2/7 = eventually sex after becoming a girlfriend
3/7 = implied that sex was highly possible
1/7 = we got drunk and made out, but I'm too tame
1/7 = she was only looking for sex and I backed away (I posted on this in my dynasty)

That counts only girls I physically met, obviously you need to meet before you can simulate procreation, and after that last seventh which was early on, I actually was putting out signals to avoid getting it on until after getting to know them. I think getting to sex is pretty easy if you have at least moderate charm (and match up in the looks range reasonably well).

HEY! Are you trying to build a best-of-breed space sim or get laid? You can't have both, dude.

[SackAttack]

Isn't that the reality of things anywhere though? HUman beings are amazingly shallow and base far too much on first impressions and physical appearance. I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

Oh bull.

Okay, I'm confused here.

RendeR's comment, if I'm interpreting it right, is basically saying that he and Telle would still be together. Or else he's using a really lousy double negative.

Either way, might want to get that one sorted out, because that was either one hell of a diss by Telle, or she's responding to what she thinks he meant, and there might be a miscommunication involved. :D

[Young Drachma]

He was saying if she'd seen what he looked like before they'd connected emotionally, she wouldn't have been interested. She said that's bull, presumably that she wouldn't have been deterred.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

I think sex is pretty easy to get to if that is what you are looking for.

I think my stats are:
2/7 = eventually sex after becoming a girlfriend
3/7 = implied that sex was highly possible
1/7 = we got drunk and made out, but I'm too tame
1/7 = she was only looking for sex and I backed away (I posted on this in my dynasty)

That counts only girls I physically met, obviously you need to meet before you can simulate procreation, and after that last seventh which was early on, I actually was putting out signals to avoid getting it on until after getting to know them. I think getting to sex is pretty easy if you have at least moderate charm (and match up in the looks range reasonably well).

How old are you? Just wondering, since the numbers tend to mystify me. If you've made it to your 20's with these stats, then I salute you.

--

Getting laid is fairly easy. Having standards tends to mess the whole getting laid thing up. I tended to have better luck when my standards fell, but that led to moments where I couldn't remember a woman's name, or if I had slept with her or not. (It's not a good feeling when "not" is the option you hope for.)

[SackAttack]

He was saying if she'd seen what he looked like before they'd connected emotionally, she wouldn't have been interested. She said that's bull, presumably that she wouldn't have been deterred.

Oh, I suspect that's what he meant, but that isn't what he said.

[RendeR]

Oh, I suspect that's what he meant, but that isn't what he said.



Actually thats exactly what I said?

[Danny]

Online dating is difficult, some pages or articles will have posted dates on them, but for the most part it's pretty difficult to know exactly when a web page was created.

[DanGarion]

Actually thats exactly what I said?

No you said you doubt you wouldn't be together. Which is the opposite of doubting you would be together.

[DanGarion]

Online dating is difficult, some pages or articles will have posted dates on them, but for the most part it's pretty difficult to know exactly when a web page was created.

*rimshot*

[sabotai]

Actually thats exactly what I said?

Rearrange the sentence.

You said "I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together."

Move the last part and it becomes: "I highly doubt that we wouldn't still be together if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me."

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Rearrange the sentence.

You said "I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together."

Move the last part and it becomes: "I highly doubt that we wouldn't still be together if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me."

We're playing word jumble now? Cool... my turn!

"Telle wouldn't be if I had cared that she actually really felt me about. Still doubt me? Before she highly "seen" we together."

[Galaxy]

We're playing word jumble now? Cool... my turn!

"Telle wouldn't be if I had cared that she actually really felt me about. Still doubt me? Before she highly "seen" we together."

If online dating is this confusing, no wonder people get pissed. :)

[SportsDino]

Haha, considering in the last two weeks I've had a lot of chatting, only one remaining candidate, and only 40 minutes of in person face time... I've had a lot of time to work on my political space station sim engine. But I do proceed at a glaciar pace, and I suddenly got lonely recently (probably the little sister having yet ANOTHER DAMN BABY therefore doubling my jealousy).

-----

I am 27, and have only been in the game for five years (starting right after a birthday, so its easy to time). My stats are depressingly low probably compared to almost everyone, and I don't target very high on the range (never even kissed above a 5 probably, if you guys would be that generous, lol).

However I know my military strategy and tend to pick battles I know I can win, and am pretty good at bringing overwhelming force to the point of attack, so among those that make it past the minefield of 'you said what? no way it happenin!' and the fact that as lynchjim says most girls seem to want to get laid.... the stats of reaching a sexual encounter are pretty high.

Unfortunately, I have met one non-batshit crazy woman, and she dumped me for probably the stupidest reason I've encountered yet. So I hardly have things figured out, I think anyone willing to play the nice/mysterious act could probably easily outscore me!

[M GO BLUE!!!]

CONFESSION TIME

Yes, I have been drinking and it's near 4am. I realized that it's been almost 10 years since I got a date in the real world. Everything has been online. The only current profile I have on an online dating site says the following:

I am much too bitter to deal with the whole dating thing. If you see me on here it's because I'm bored and looking to assure myself that there is nothing out there. So far, you ladies have been doing splendidly! Now go pat yourself on the back and ignore me (you're darn good at it!)

It's self explanatory. Women is a spectator sport. I played the game, and much like football I realize that my time on the field has passed. Fuck it.

[RendeR]

Isn't that the reality of things anywhere though? HUman beings are amazingly shallow and base far too much on first impressions and physical appearance. I highly doubt that if Telle had actually "seen" me before she felt she really cared about me we wouldn't still be together.

No you said you doubt you wouldn't be together. Which is the opposite of doubting you would be together.

Nevermind, I get the grammar pedantics now.

[RendeR]

Haha, considering in the last two weeks I've had a lot of chatting, only one remaining candidate, and only 40 minutes of in person face time... I've had a lot of time to work on my political space station sim engine. But I do proceed at a glaciar pace, and I suddenly got lonely recently (probably the little sister having yet ANOTHER DAMN BABY therefore doubling my jealousy).

-----

I am 27, and have only been in the game for five years (starting right after a birthday, so its easy to time). My stats are depressingly low probably compared to almost everyone, and I don't target very high on the range (never even kissed above a 5 probably, if you guys would be that generous, lol).

However I know my military strategy and tend to pick battles I know I can win, and am pretty good at bringing overwhelming force to the point of attack, so among those that make it past the minefield of 'you said what? no way it happenin!' and the fact that as lynchjim says most girls seem to want to get laid.... the stats of reaching a sexual encounter are pretty high.

Unfortunately, I have met one non-batshit crazy woman, and she dumped me for probably the stupidest reason I've encountered yet. So I hardly have things figured out, I think anyone willing to play the nice/mysterious act could probably easily outscore me!


I'm sure you know this by now but...


YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG!!!!!!!!!!!!:D

[SportsDino]

Ya I think around 30 I'll have realized I've turned down more sex than I will ever possibly be able to obtain from that point on... then bashing head against a wall will commence.

Hell at 27 I've realized that college would have been the easiest time to land in the 6-8 range, I'd be lucky to get a 5 now, of course what time did I pick to be a reclusive super genius?! Frick!

I'm pretty sure I'll be in the M GO BLUE boat soon enough at the present rate, although I guess if I was willing to drop all of my silly rules I could make a go at it. At 30 I think I'll just give it up and see how many times I can score before I get too old.

[Izulde]

Hell I'm 30 and the last time I had a real life date was when I was 18. And, due to betting with other guys in the class I was in with the girl in question, I actually made money.

I sometimes wonder how my life would've turned out if I'd hadn't let the depression take over me and destroy that year. She was -very- interested in continuing it and I liked her, too.

[lynchjm24]

Haha, considering in the last two weeks I've had a lot of chatting, only one remaining candidate, and only 40 minutes of in person face time... I've had a lot of time to work on my political space station sim engine. But I do proceed at a glaciar pace, and I suddenly got lonely recently (probably the little sister having yet ANOTHER DAMN BABY therefore doubling my jealousy).

-----

I am 27, and have only been in the game for five years (starting right after a birthday, so its easy to time). My stats are depressingly low probably compared to almost everyone, and I don't target very high on the range (never even kissed above a 5 probably, if you guys would be that generous, lol).

However I know my military strategy and tend to pick battles I know I can win, and am pretty good at bringing overwhelming force to the point of attack, so among those that make it past the minefield of 'you said what? no way it happenin!' and the fact that as lynchjim says most girls seem to want to get laid.... the stats of reaching a sexual encounter are pretty high.

Unfortunately, I have met one non-batshit crazy woman, and she dumped me for probably the stupidest reason I've encountered yet. So I hardly have things figured out, I think anyone willing to play the nice/mysterious act could probably easily outscore me!

My first job out of college was a horrible sales job. Dating is a lot like that shitty job. It's a numbers game and every no brings you that much closer to a yes.

My dating strategy was simple. Cast a wide net, give girls a chance and have a good time. I wasn't really all that concerned about finding the 'one' for falling in love, so maybe that makes it much easier then someone who is looking for true love or some sort of meaningful relationship. I figured if that happened, it happened but I really didn't give a shit either way.

And if it's sex you are after that's easy, the key is copious amounts of booze.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Hell I'm 30 and the last time I had a real life date was when I was 18. And, due to betting with other guys in the class I was in with the girl in question, I actually made money.

I sometimes wonder how my life would've turned out if I'd hadn't let the depression take over me and destroy that year. She was -very- interested in continuing it and I liked her, too.

Here is a possible outcome: http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/22/magazine/22Paternity-t.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&ref=magazine

[Izulde]

Here is a possible outcome: How DNA Testing Is Changing Fatherhood - NYTimes.com (http://www.nytimes.com/2009/11/22/magazine/22Paternity-t.html?pagewanted=1&_r=1&ref=magazine)

Fascinating article. Thanks for the link.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Fascinating article. Thanks for the link.

I know... it probably deserves its own thread, to avoid a possible threadjack.

[Poli]

It's self explanatory. Women is a spectator sport. I played the game, and much like football I realize that my time on the field has passed. Fuck it.
QF...well shoot, I don't know. Just quoted for the wow.

[SportsDino]

Women IS a spectator sport!

So says 90% of the internet, and the song 'The Internet is for Porn"

[Galaxy]

Wanted to bump this...

[DanGarion]

Wanted to bump this...

Why is that?

[Galaxy]

Any interesting stories recently?

Has anyone ever contacted someone who is long-distance?

[TroyF]

Any interesting stories recently?

Has anyone ever contacted someone who is long-distance?

My wife and I celebrated our third anniversary last night. We met online.

[DaddyTorgo]

I've been messing with match.com for a while now, just signed up and made a profile for free and all, and keep looking at my 5 daily matches. Figure at some point I'll sign up if one of those like...absolutely blows me away, or at some point when I just like...get uber-lonely, and by then I'll have a nice stable of folks who look interesting to start with.

I guess I don't really get lonely anymore though, having been alone for my whole life (in that sense), so I dunno if that will really ever happen.

[Tigercat]

Here is my problem(s) lately with online dating. I am horrible at first romantic impressions. Now on early encounters, I am not a blathering nervous idiot or too forward or anything, I just apparently suck at doing the things it takes to help start that spark. (I'm not above average in the looks department, so being able to leave a real romantic impression through interaction is important!)

I find though, that even if you meet a good match online that you had a few good conversations with beforehand, that it doesn't really help a guy like me. If you've gotten to know someone a bit before the quasi-blind date, and they don't feel the spark up front in person, now you don't even have as much of a mystery angle to keep them interested long enough for the spark to be noticeable in future encounters.

In other words, for those that are lacking in the suave category, I find online dating to be an expressway to the friend zone.

[DaddyTorgo]

Here is my problem(s) lately with online dating. I am horrible at first romantic impressions. Now on early encounters, I am not a blathering nervous idiot or too forward or anything, I just apparently suck at doing the things it takes to help start that spark. (I'm not above average in the looks department, so being able to leave a real romantic impression through interaction is important!)

I find though, that even if you meet a good match online that you had a few good conversations with beforehand, that it doesn't really help a guy like me. If you've gotten to know someone a bit before the quasi-blind date, and they don't feel the spark up front in person, now you don't even have as much of a mystery angle to keep them interested long enough for the spark to be noticeable in future encounters.

In other words, for those that are lacking in the suave category, I find online dating to be an expressway to the friend zone.

Yikes - this would certainly be my problem. I have zero game - having zero experience.

[Lathum]

Here is my problem(s) lately with online dating. I am horrible at first romantic impressions. Now on early encounters, I am not a blathering nervous idiot or too forward or anything, I just apparently suck at doing the things it takes to help start that spark. (I'm not above average in the looks department, so being able to leave a real romantic impression through interaction is important!)

I find though, that even if you meet a good match online that you had a few good conversations with beforehand, that it doesn't really help a guy like me. If you've gotten to know someone a bit before the quasi-blind date, and they don't feel the spark up front in person, now you don't even have as much of a mystery angle to keep them interested long enough for the spark to be noticeable in future encounters.

In other words, for those that are lacking in the suave category, I find online dating to be an expressway to the friend zone.

Sounds like you are overthinking it.

Try getting a really good buzz on before a date, that will loosen things up. If that doesn't work try doing something that may spur on conversation. Go to a bar that has a trivia night, go to the track or casino, maybe a murder mystery. Something that will help fill the conversation gaps and give you stuff to talk about besides yourselves.

[EagleFan]

Here is my problem(s) lately with online dating. I am horrible at first romantic impressions. Now on early encounters, I am not a blathering nervous idiot or too forward or anything, I just apparently suck at doing the things it takes to help start that spark. (I'm not above average in the looks department, so being able to leave a real romantic impression through interaction is important!)

I find though, that even if you meet a good match online that you had a few good conversations with beforehand, that it doesn't really help a guy like me. If you've gotten to know someone a bit before the quasi-blind date, and they don't feel the spark up front in person, now you don't even have as much of a mystery angle to keep them interested long enough for the spark to be noticeable in future encounters.

In other words, for those that are lacking in the suave category, I find online dating to be an expressway to the friend zone.

You've got baby batter on the brain... ;)

Seriously though, what Lathum was saying. This described me quite well. Never had any luck and when I finally started dating my wife I had already given into the fact that I was going to be single forever. It seemed like there wasn't as much pressure that I was putting on myself at that point and things went well. This year will be our 18th anniverary.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Sounds like you are overthinking it.

+1

Just consider this: If I can end up married (and staying married) for close to 20 years and still counting, then ANYBODY can find somebody.

I'll also echo EF, marriage (nor anything like a long relationship) was remotely on my mind when I found mine. Last thing on Earth I'd suggest anybody be thinking about is pretty much anything beyond just letting stuff happen as it will.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Wanted to bump this...
Why is that?

Because he hasn't "bumped" anything else lately! :lol:

[sovereignstar v2]

What a fucking weirdo.

[Suicane75]

I met a hottie right here on FOFC. We spent a week together but didn't get physical. Played some Madden, smoked some weed and shared a Digornios.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Since moving back home, then getting my own place I have been on two dates & one "meeting."

1. Nice. Made out with her a bit. Never saw her again, as her schedule & mine didn't match up well & when she would say she had time she would seem to vanish. Oh well, the pic I really liked of her wasn't the best representation.

2. I was and am really impressed with her. She seems to like me. I didn't get that spark though. Again, the pics that made me say "WOOOOO HOOOO!" were of her, yet I could have walked by her while looking for the woman pictured.

3. The meeting. The pic was so far off... She looked like an ex girl of mine in the pic. In reality, not at all. Plus it's hard to see how she actually hid the rest of her. It's never a good sign when you are about to meet a woman and this song coincidentally comes up on your iPod in shuffle mode:

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/kX8rAEYmUWE" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

I'm taking a break. Really, with my income I don't need to be doing anything other than paying bills & looking for a real job.

[Galaxy]

What a fucking weirdo.

You're jealous.

[Grover]

3. The meeting. The pic was so far off... She looked like an ex girl of mine in the pic. In reality, not at all. Plus it's hard to see how she actually hid the rest of her.

I'm taking a break. Really, with my income I don't need to be doing anything other than paying bills & looking for a real job.

The larger girls always tend to take pictures from the shoulders up, or in a flattering fashion of cleavage up from an overhead shot. That's how they hide it all.

As far as women, I'm in the same department as you. My girlfriend left me in September, went back to her ex. I'm done with dating until I find a full time job and get some debt paid off. Especially since I had to move back home after losing my job. But, I find that when not looking for it, that's when it seems to come along most often.

[Izulde]

FWIW, the whole finding someone when not looking is true for quite a few people, but to paraphrase a short story in Sherwood Anderson's Winesburg, Ohio some people are meant to live and die alone.

I accepted a couple years ago that I'm one of those people.

[RedKingGold]

I met a hottie right here on FOFC. We spent a week together but didn't get physical. Played some Madden, smoked some weed and shared a Digornios.

I always wondered how you and sov became butt buddies.

[Suicane75]

You're jealous.

[SportsDino]

I am about to marry the girl I found through online dating system. Introduction that NEVER would have happened without it.

[Rizon]

Sugar Daddy Online Dating (http://sugardaddie.com/)

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Probably the best three dates I ever had were from women met online too (throw those in with the few dozen horror stories)

1. When all was said & done I went home singing. Couldn't wipe the grin off my face. Nothing overboard, just a nice evening filled with drinks, staring at boobies & then making out for probably a half hour. Relationship lasted a year & a half. We ended up becoming friends after a while apart & chat nearly every day.

2. Probably the best first kiss ever. When setting up a second date she said she couldn't get together the next week because she would be laying on a beach in DR. I looked deep into her eyes & said "I really, truly hate you" Then we kissed right on the street in NYC in front of the Museum of Natural History. Relationship only lasted a few months because she knew I wanted to move back home to Detroit. Still, a damn good woman. Miss her...

3. Met to go to dinner. The place we were going to go was closing. There was no other place we could think of close by other than a Chinese take-out. I lived close by, so offered to head to my place to eat. Once there we talked, watched a movie & I put my moves on her. Got nowhere. Seemed like there was a wall up. When I finally got frustrated to the point I was thinking about how to get rid of her I excused myself to use the bathroom. Two minutes later she's not in my living room. "Hey..." "I'm in here" Great... what's she snooping around in my bedroom for? Oh my... she's taking off her panties. Damn those boobies are NICE!!!

Believe it or not, she was a bit crazy... Three weeks is all I could stand.

[jeff061]

I have found I personally reject woman based on their profiles online that I wouldn't in real life. I actually read an article on the phenomenon. I think the specific nature of online profiles tends to have you over prioritize the negatives and under prioritize the positives. In real life its the opposite, which I think is better. You can't define chemistry on paper.

[JediKooter]

I've been 'seeing' someone for a few months now. She contacted me on Plenty of Fish. She's not quite what I'm looking for, but, oh man, can she give an awesome BJ.

I think the women here in the bay area, though a lot are very attractive, are such nut cases, it's next to impossible for me to actually get along with most of them.

[Rizon]

I've been 'seeing' someone for a few months now. She contacted me on Plenty of Fish. She's not quite what I'm looking for, but, oh man, can she give an awesome BJ.

I think the women here in the bay area, though a lot are very attractive, are such nut cases, it's next to impossible for me to actually get along with most of them.

Hmmm ...

[Chief Rum]

I struggle with generating that spark on the date, too, although I am learning to get better at it.

But, then, it may not matter much anymore, because my GF and I are doing really well right now. But I am still working on it, even with her, just to make things more enjoyable for her.

My understanding (and this is hard for me to do, because I am at heart "a nice guy" and I don't step on toes easily) is that you want to be aggressive, be the man. Smallest opportunity for a kiss? Go for it. Take her hand when you're walking around as soon as you can. Surprise her--don't wait for the end of the date to be forward about things. Women like sex, too (I know, amazing huh?)--if she's out on a date with you, she's interested in sex. So just by being on the date, you have a decent chance to generate that spark, and see if there's something there.

You should still watch for the opening, though--if it's not there, it's just not there. My GF encourages an open relationship with me, and so I went out with this very beautiful woman I met at a bar a couple weekends ago. She was a sweetheart and a great conversationalist, and we actually had a great time talking over dinner, laughing, enjoying each other's company. But the whole time I didn't get even the hint that she wanted anything more than a dinner companion, not a single come hither glance, nothing, and the date ended with a hug. So even though I had a really good time, I have not called her, and I don't plan to.

[JediKooter]

Hmmm ...

At least it wasn't Norv.

[DaddyTorgo]

My GF encourages an open relationship with me...

You realize this means she's doing the same right?

[RedKingGold]

You're jealous.

:(

[Chief Rum]

You realize this means she's doing the same right?

Yes, but it's more complicated than that. Not something I'll get into here. Let's just say that her end of the open relationship is only in particular circumstances, and eventually mine will be that way, too, and we're both fine with it.

She has only been with nine men her whole life, and they were all "relationships". So it's not quite what you think.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

She has only been with nine men her whole life, and they were all "relationships". So it's not quite what you think.

Sorry, but I had to...

<iframe width="420" height="315" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/HkfI5gYCoD8" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

[Chief Rum]

Lol... M go blue...

Naw, I'm no babe in the woods. I know what I'm getting into with her. :P

[DaddyTorgo]

Yes, but it's more complicated than that. Not something I'll get into here. Let's just say that her end of the open relationship is only in particular circumstances, and eventually mine will be that way, too, and we're both fine with it.

She has only been with nine men her whole life, and they were all "relationships". So it's not quite what you think.

Interesting.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Gotta know this Rummy...

Is her "open" end for chicks also?

[Rizon]

Gotta know this Rummy...

Is her "open" end for chicks also?

Only if his open end is for guys.

[Chief Rum]

Gotta know this Rummy...

Is her "open" end for chicks also?

You're no babe in the woods, either, are you?

[Chief Rum]

Only if his open end is for guys.

That end is most definitely NOT open. :eek:

[JonInMiddleGA]

That end is most definitely NOT open. :eek:

http://www.safetysign.com/images/catlog/product/large/F7880-stop-wrong-way.pnghttp://www.thomaslockehobbs.com/2004/04-01-17-09.jpg

edit: The second sign is for those who are tempted to ignore the first one

[M GO BLUE!!!]

You're no babe in the woods, either, are you?

That answer was neither a confirmation, nor a denial. :D

Here's a little story about a friend of mine...

His second wife comes home one day and tells him that she has tried to be good, but can't repress her bisexuality any longer. She needed a woman. Would it be ok if she went to the bar, picked up a woman, brought her home and they shared her? His answer was what many men's would have been. And he enjoyed a couple years of his wife bringing home women.

Then, she tells him that she is jealous of him being with these women. She wants them to herself. Oh, and she's really not feeling men anymore either. Next thing, there is a steady woman. She moves in with her, leaving him with three kids in the house (two were hers from a previous relationship.) She comes back a while later, then misses her girlfriend & throws him out the house so the girlfriend can move in. Another fight with the girlfriend & his brother moves in. (He no longer talks with his brother.)

They finally got divorced & he's on marriage #3.

(Just a little story to beware that something that seems phenomenally lucky can really be something completely fucked up on the horizon.)

[Chief Rum]

How old was this woman when it happened?

My GF is very settled in who she is and she has a LOT of experience to back herself up on this. She enjoys her bisexuality, but she came to terms a long time ago that when it comes to the long haul, she's into men, and there's no replacing that. If my GF was 20-something and had little experience I would be worried, but she turns 39 in a week and is about as confident in her sexuality as anyone I have ever met. Frankly, she's more likely going to need to worry more about me with other women than I will with her and other "anyone". Although I don't intend to have that be an issue either.

[StLee]

I struggle with generating that spark on the date, too, although I am learning to get better at it.

But, then, it may not matter much anymore, because my GF and I are doing really well right now. But I am still working on it, even with her, just to make things more enjoyable for her.

My understanding (and this is hard for me to do, because I am at heart "a nice guy" and I don't step on toes easily) is that you want to be aggressive, be the man. Smallest opportunity for a kiss? Go for it. Take her hand when you're walking around as soon as you can. Surprise her--don't wait for the end of the date to be forward about things. Women like sex, too (I know, amazing huh?)--if she's out on a date with you, she's interested in sex. So just by being on the date, you have a decent chance to generate that spark, and see if there's something there.



This is sound advice for those struggling with the dating scene. Being relaxed and confident are two things women are drawn to.

I would add another secret to drawing a woman towards you is complicated but simple: listen. Ask a few leading questions. When she starts talking about a subject she's interested in, ask a few more questions. If you're knowledgeable about the subject, keep quiet and let her talk about it, but use that knowledge to lead her deeper into the subject. As an anecdote that works constantly for me, I talk maybe about 20% of the time but always get told I'm a great conversationalist (married now, and my wife has been saying it since Day 1 of our dating--perfect for me because I don't want to talk 50% or more of the time). It's psychological, but people love being listened to.

On that same note, there's a huge difference between being a good listener and being a creepy listener. Think Howard from The Big Bang Theory. Don't lean in too close. Don't give too many "Really?" or "I didn't know that" statements. But do make LOTS of eye contact.

I'm guessing you guys aren't oblivious when it comes to dating so just take my extra advice as you feel you need it. I've been in that same boat as some of you. In my 20s, I was frustrated at how hard it was to find a decent date, much less how to be "good" at dating. Later, I took a f*** it approach and just started approaching dating in a selfish way. My selfishness led to me being direct about what I wanted, which strangely enough led to women finding me more alpha than omega in their attraction level.

[Chief Rum]

This is sound advice for those struggling with the dating scene. Being relaxed and confident are two things women are drawn to.

I would add another secret to drawing a woman towards you is complicated but simple: listen. Ask a few leading questions. When she starts talking about a subject she's interested in, ask a few more questions. If you're knowledgeable about the subject, keep quiet and let her talk about it, but use that knowledge to lead her deeper into the subject. As an anecdote that works constantly for me, I talk maybe about 20% of the time but always get told I'm a great conversationalist (married now, and my wife has been saying it since Day 1 of our dating--perfect for me because I don't want to talk 50% or more of the time). It's psychological, but people love being listened to.

On that same note, there's a huge difference between being a good listener and being a creepy listener. Think Howard from The Big Bang Theory. Don't lean in too close. Don't give too many "Really?" or "I didn't know that" statements. But do make LOTS of eye contact.

I'm guessing you guys aren't oblivious when it comes to dating so just take my extra advice as you feel you need it. I've been in that same boat as some of you. In my 20s, I was frustrated at how hard it was to find a decent date, much less how to be "good" at dating. Later, I took a f*** it approach and just started approaching dating in a selfish way. My selfishness led to me being direct about what I wanted, which strangely enough led to women finding me more alpha than omega in their attraction level.

This (and not just because he starts by agreeing with me). I am very good at "conversing" and making eye contact. Like StLee said, I often don't end up speaking more than 20% of the time. I just listen. And I really listen. Pay attention to what she's saying. Try and remember it, too--she WILL reference it later, guaranteed (either later in the date or on future dates). And the eye contact is critical. Do not look at your plate. Do not stare around the room. Look right at her, especially when she's talking. Meet eyes as often as possible.

But keep in mind, this is brief. Do not hold the gaze. If she looks away, don't still be holding the gaze when she looks back. If she doesn't look away, casually look away yourself. Holding that contact for too long is too much for people, and gets uber creepy. But if you don't do it all, she'll assume you're not interested at all. Somewhere in between not interested and uber creepy is a level of eye contact that she will find to be a complete turn-on.

Little touches help, too. A hand to her lower back (not butt!) or briefly to just above her waist (one hand, not both) while you guys are walking, helping guide her, is okay, or a brief touch to her shoulder. If she starts to reach across the table toward you, don't be afraid to take her hand. And put your hand out there, too. Do it while you're engaged, speaking with one another. Bare skin touch better than clothes (but only appropriately bare areas).

Be decisive. This one is very hard for me. I bend over backwards to show a girl a good time, and part of that often ends up me asking her what she wants to do. If you can pull it off, don't ask. Just take her somewhere. Phrase things this way, "I know this great Italian place I want to show you", instead of "do you feel like having Italian?" If she has a problem with what you're doing, she'll say something. Then you just adjust.

Not all the women are the same, and this won't work the same way with all of them, but it works with most.

[Galaxy]

This is sound advice for those struggling with the dating scene. Being relaxed and confident are two things women are drawn to.

I would add another secret to drawing a woman towards you is complicated but simple: listen. Ask a few leading questions. When she starts talking about a subject she's interested in, ask a few more questions. If you're knowledgeable about the subject, keep quiet and let her talk about it, but use that knowledge to lead her deeper into the subject. As an anecdote that works constantly for me, I talk maybe about 20% of the time but always get told I'm a great conversationalist (married now, and my wife has been saying it since Day 1 of our dating--perfect for me because I don't want to talk 50% or more of the time). It's psychological, but people love being listened to.

On that same note, there's a huge difference between being a good listener and being a creepy listener. Think Howard from The Big Bang Theory. Don't lean in too close. Don't give too many "Really?" or "I didn't know that" statements. But do make LOTS of eye contact.

I'm guessing you guys aren't oblivious when it comes to dating so just take my extra advice as you feel you need it. I've been in that same boat as some of you. In my 20s, I was frustrated at how hard it was to find a decent date, much less how to be "good" at dating. Later, I took a f*** it approach and just started approaching dating in a selfish way. My selfishness led to me being direct about what I wanted, which strangely enough led to women finding me more alpha than omega in their attraction level.

I'm guessing it varies depending on the level of intelligent (and their backgrounds in terms of occupation, interests, and education--a high school grad will be different than dating someone with a Master's or PhD degree)

How do you open your first messages via online dating?

[sabotai]

This might sound really.....really lame, but if you are worried about how to go about talking to dates, or even people in general, it's not a bad idea to buy a few books on the topic. (And no, I don't mean those "How to bang the chick on the first date" type books)

I'm not afraid to admit that I've hit the books a bit for ideas for how to actually talk to people. One of the books I've read is "How To Talk To Anyone" by Leil Lowndes. It didn't exactly change my life or anything, but it does gives a lot of tips for various situations. A lot seem like common sense....after you hear about it (some do sound pretty silly though). One of the things CR just said about eye contact is something she talked about, as well as how to make eye contact with someone in a group situation when she's not the one talking ("Watch the speaker but let your glance bounce to your target each time the speaker finishes a point.")

It's not like I follow every tip in the book (many just really go against my character too much for me to really consider) and I know it feels a bit embarrassing to buy books like these (thanks Kindle!), but they've helped me stop being a 100%, totally unintentionally creepy guy. Not that I've had any dates, but they have helped me interact with new people in general.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

How old was this woman when it happened?

My GF is very settled in who she is and she has a LOT of experience to back herself up on this. She enjoys her bisexuality, but she came to terms a long time ago that when it comes to the long haul, she's into men, and there's no replacing that. If my GF was 20-something and had little experience I would be worried, but she turns 39 in a week and is about as confident in her sexuality as anyone I have ever met. Frankly, she's more likely going to need to worry more about me with other women than I will with her and other "anyone". Although I don't intend to have that be an issue either.

She was probably in her early 30's. I never asked (and didn't care!)

Happy 39 to your woman! 39 has been an interesting year for me so far...

[Izulde]

The creepy factor is one I've had problems with (big surprise, right?), but a large part of that comes from my hating social situations. A good 75-80% of the time I can't hear what's going on in your average bar situation, and if it's crowded and/or noisy, make that 95%.

So part of that necessity of eye contact is that I won't hear what the girl is saying otherwise and it turns into the How I Met Your Mother club episode, only she can hear me.

Then there's the fact that when I don't look at people directly, I tend to stare vacantly at objects or words, either rearranging letters into other words or pondering whatever subjects the objects bring to mind as a form of escapism while I wish I was anywhere else but that situation. If I can, I get up and leave. If I'm ride dependent, I stay silent and just stare at things around the room, occasionally glancing at people's facial expressions, inserting a smile or laugh where it seems appropriate and... yeah. Most of the time I just tune out completely.

[Izulde]

Holy shit. I just found one of my roommates on match.com. I am so going to bust her chops about it hahahahahahahaha.

Put it this way, the type of dude she's looking for, there is no way in hell she's going to find him online dating.

Setting her straight on this is going to be good fun.

[Galaxy]

Holy shit. I just found one of my roommates on match.com. I am so going to bust her chops about it hahahahahahahaha.

Put it this way, the type of dude she's looking for, there is no way in hell she's going to find him online dating.

Setting her straight on this is going to be good fun.

Oh...This will be good. I love it when you come across people you knew (but maybe weren't friends with) in high school and such.

What is she looking for?

[Izulde]

A 6'-6'7" athletic, toned guy who is genuine, intelligent, Christian and normal because she hasn't had any luck finding that in this city outside our little group (which in and of itself has had some amusing relationship dynamics).

Yeah. I don't see her finding that on match.com. Maybe 2 out of the assortment, 3 tops. But all of them? Doubt it.

[Galaxy]

A 6'-6'7" athletic, toned guy who is genuine, intelligent, Christian and normal because she hasn't had any luck finding that in this city outside our little group (which in and of itself has had some amusing relationship dynamics).

Yeah. I don't see her finding that on match.com. Maybe 2 out of the assortment, 3 tops. But all of them? Doubt it.

She better be one hell of a catch, because the demand-and-supply ratio won't be in her favor.

[SackAttack]

So part of that necessity of eye contact is that I won't hear what the girl is saying otherwise

Yep. Hearing impairment is a fun thing to deal with when you're attempting to...well, do much of anything on the dating scene.

[RedKingGold]

Holy shit. I just found one of my roommates on match.com. I am so going to bust her chops about it hahahahahahahaha.

Put it this way, the type of dude she's looking for, there is no way in hell she's going to find him online dating.

Setting her straight on this is going to be good fun.

This is probably why you haven't had a date in ten years.

Just sayin'

[M GO BLUE!!!]

She better be one hell of a catch, because the demand-and-supply ratio won't be in her favor.

I love it when you see a woman that looks like Mrs. Haney (Green Acres) who is very specific about what she wants, and there is no way in hell she'll get him without a shotgun, date-rape drug and a prayer..

[mauchow]

Holy shit. I just found one of my roommates on match.com. I am so going to bust her chops about it hahahahahahahaha.

Put it this way, the type of dude she's looking for, there is no way in hell she's going to find him online dating.

Setting her straight on this is going to be good fun.

I'm Pretty sure this movie ends with you ddating her. I had to have seen this chick flick already.

[Ksyrup]

It's times like this I wish a certain Longhorns fan was still a member here...

[JonInMiddleGA]

A hand to her lower back (not butt!) or briefly to just above her waist (one hand, not both) while you guys are walking, helping guide her, is okay,

I've always felt like I owed a debt to the first somewhat older woman I ever dated for teaching me that particular trick.

[JonInMiddleGA]

Most of the time I just tune out completely.

Chicks hate that shit, you can't really do that until after you're married (or at least engaged with a date)

;)

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Be caught a couple times checking out her rack. Try to play it off, but her noticing you noticing goes a long way. If you don't, you're not interested. If you overdo it you're a perv. She probable spent time looking at them in the mirror to put on her best "face," so you better notice.

[Galaxy]

I love it when you see a woman that looks like Mrs. Haney (Green Acres) who is very specific about what she wants, and there is no way in hell she'll get him without a shotgun, date-rape drug and a prayer..

Don't settle, right?

[Buccaneer]

Yep. Hearing impairment is a fun thing to deal with when you're attempting to...well, do much of anything on the dating scene.

Or much of anything dealing with social interactions. :(

[Galaxy]

Or much of anything dealing with social interactions. :(

+1

[Izulde]

+1

+2.

[Izulde]

She better be one hell of a catch, because the demand-and-supply ratio won't be in her favor.

She's mildly cute right now, I would say, but the jury's out on whether she'll age well. And to her defense, she's both intelligent and athletic (earned a sports scholarship to her undergrad school, I believe).

However, I think her expectations have perhaps been inflated by the fact that she's considered the most attractive single female in the program, so many of the single guys have fallen and fallen hard for her.

I'd probably put her somewhere in the 7s in terms of total package (looks, smarts, personality, etc), which, while better than the standard online dating female, probably isn't enough to get her that sort of rare bird she's going for.

[Izulde]

I'm Pretty sure this movie ends with you ddating her. I had to have seen this chick flick already.

Nah. 1) She's a roommate, 2) There's already been some hilarious inter-group drama/dating with two other guys. I want to be able to keep laughing at the absurdity, not become a part of it, and 3) It's quite clear she's not in to me at all and even if she were, I'm not normal, Christian, 6' (5'10), or athletic/toned. Shit I haven't done anything participating athletically since two weeks of fencing at Wyoming back in 2005. Did try out for the club soccer team at UW-La Crosse back in '07 or '08, but didn't make it.

[SackAttack]

Or much of anything dealing with social interactions. :(

This is why I play video games on Friday and Saturday nights instead of going out and getting shitfaced. :D

[PilotMan]

That answer was neither a confirmation, nor a denial. :D

Here's a little story about a friend of mine...

His second wife comes home one day and tells him that she has tried to be good, but can't repress her bisexuality any longer. She needed a woman. Would it be ok if she went to the bar, picked up a woman, brought her home and they shared her? His answer was what many men's would have been. And he enjoyed a couple years of his wife bringing home women.

Then, she tells him that she is jealous of him being with these women. She wants them to herself. Oh, and she's really not feeling men anymore either. Next thing, there is a steady woman. She moves in with her, leaving him with three kids in the house (two were hers from a previous relationship.) She comes back a while later, then misses her girlfriend & throws him out the house so the girlfriend can move in. Another fight with the girlfriend & his brother moves in. (He no longer talks with his brother.)

They finally got divorced & he's on marriage #3.

(Just a little story to beware that something that seems phenomenally lucky can really be something completely fucked up on the horizon.)

How old was this woman when it happened?

My GF is very settled in who she is and she has a LOT of experience to back herself up on this. She enjoys her bisexuality, but she came to terms a long time ago that when it comes to the long haul, she's into men, and there's no replacing that. If my GF was 20-something and had little experience I would be worried, but she turns 39 in a week and is about as confident in her sexuality as anyone I have ever met. Frankly, she's more likely going to need to worry more about me with other women than I will with her and other "anyone". Although I don't intend to have that be an issue either.

My wife is very comfortable with her's as well. The last two times we have gone to the comedy club my wife has been hit on in the bathroom. Both times the women were quite attractive, and even though my wife didn't pursue it, it certainly brought a different dynamic to the bedroom.

[Passacaglia]

What?

[M GO BLUE!!!]

She was the man that night.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Who Wants To Be My Forever Daddy (http://detroit.craigslist.org/mcb/w4m/2895554155.html)

[Grover]

Who Wants To Be My Forever Daddy (http://detroit.craigslist.org/mcb/w4m/2895554155.html)

I believe that Simba forgot to include that Mommy is insane.

[Passacaglia]

So are replies supposed to be addressed to the cat?

[Galaxy]

Who Wants To Be My Forever Daddy (http://detroit.craigslist.org/mcb/w4m/2895554155.html)

Wow...That perfect driving record is sexy.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

So are replies supposed to be addressed to the cat?

You got me laughing hard with this. :lol:

[Galaxy]

She's mildly cute right now, I would say, but the jury's out on whether she'll age well. And to her defense, she's both intelligent and athletic (earned a sports scholarship to her undergrad school, I believe).

However, I think her expectations have perhaps been inflated by the fact that she's considered the most attractive single female in the program, so many of the single guys have fallen and fallen hard for her.

I'd probably put her somewhere in the 7s in terms of total package (looks, smarts, personality, etc), which, while better than the standard online dating female, probably isn't enough to get her that sort of rare bird she's going for.

The question is, how long will she be in her prime to be able to think that way?

[M GO BLUE!!!]

You know what is a huge turnoff to me? When in a profile women get basics wrong. You should be looking for "a good man" not "a good men" (the "I am a good women" is there too")

I just read a woman who wrote she likes to "live life to the fullness"

Does that mean she suffers from chronic "itis?"

[Chief Rum]

You know what is a huge turnoff to me? When in a profile women get basics wrong. You should be looking for "a good man" not "a good men" (the "I am a good women" is there too")

I just read a woman who wrote she likes to "live life to the fullness"

Does that mean she suffers from chronic "itis?"

Keep in mind, a high percentage of those profiles are written by foreign women (or sometimes, not even women) who are part of scams to try to get you hooked into them, so you'll spend money on them. So English is not their first language.

I have learned to read profiles carefully to look for "foreign" indicators before I try to contact them.

[Galaxy]

Keep in mind, a high percentage of those profiles are written by foreign women (or sometimes, not even women) who are part of scams to try to get you hooked into them, so you'll spend money on them. So English is not their first language.

I have learned to read profiles carefully to look for "foreign" indicators before I try to contact them.

What sites are you using?

[Galaxy]

You know what is a huge turnoff to me? When in a profile women get basics wrong. You should be looking for "a good man" not "a good men" (the "I am a good women" is there too")

I just read a woman who wrote she likes to "live life to the fullness"

Does that mean she suffers from chronic "itis?"

I love profiles when they're generic, and after you read them, you still know next-to-nothing about them; but they sure know what they're asking for.

[JediKooter]

I saw this problem A LOT on match.com. It got to the point where I could see the cut and pasting going on. Then there's the profiles that use pictures of porn actresses. Pffffft, like I haven't seen my fair share of porn actresses and I'd highly highly doubt one of them would be on a online dating site.

[Chief Rum]

What sites are you using?

match.com, zoosk, cupid.com. I probably have a profile on a couple others that I set up and forgot about.

[Tigercat]

okcupid is an interesting option if y'all haven't tried it before. More of a quirky population there (good and bad) and it's free.

[Izulde]

OkCupid and PoF both annoy the shit out of me. The free sites also have the lowest rates of response. Which makes sense. There's no monetary investment there. Still aggravating, though.

[sabotai]

I signed up for okcupid awhile ago to check out what my options were. I was less than impressed.

[DaddyTorgo]

I signed up for okcupid awhile ago to check out what my options were. I was less than impressed.

+1

[Rizon]

I tried OKcupid about 4 years ago. I'd say around 100% of the accounts that contacted me were fake. Might have changed since then.

[DaddyTorgo]

I tried OKcupid about 4 years ago. I'd say around 100% of the accounts that contacted me were fake. Might have changed since then.

Everyone that contacted me was just...not attractive to me at all.

[JediKooter]

PoF = Plenty of big girls. Not that there's anything wrong with big girls. Just not my type.

OkCupid = Is pretty much full of kinky overweight women or narcissistic women who don't understand why they're still single.

[DaddyTorgo]

PoF = Plenty of big girls. Not that there's anything wrong with big girls. Just not my type.

OkCupid = Is pretty much full of kinky overweight women or narcissistic women who don't understand why they're still single.

I've found pretty much the same out here to be honest. PoF is slightly better than OkCupid.

One of these days when I get serious about things I'll have to sign up for Match.com I guess. Seems that that's the only place where the "less than big girls" go.

On a related note...wtf is up with everyone having babies? :( I want babies. My sister has 3 kids. My oldest friend (from kindergarden) just had her first...wtf!?!?! :( I need to meet the right someone and get married and get a family going :cry: .

[JediKooter]

I've found pretty much the same out here to be honest. PoF is slightly better than OkCupid.

One of these days when I get serious about things I'll have to sign up for Match.com I guess. Seems that that's the only place where the "less than big girls" go.

On a related note...wtf is up with everyone having babies? :( I want babies. My sister has 3 kids. My oldest friend (from kindergarden) just had her first...wtf!?!?! :( I need to meet the right someone and get married and get a family going :cry: .

I wasn't impressed with match.com either. My opinion was: If I'm going to have to pay a monthly fee to see the same chicks that I see on okcupid or plenty of fish...I'm not paying for match.com. Plus, the only site where I've received any kind of scam/phishing from, was from match. YMMV though.

I have no idea what's with people having kids. If it makes you feel any better, I don't have any of my own. :) But, I hear you. I want my own family too. Sometimes it just doesn't happen right when you want it to.

[DaddyTorgo]

I wasn't impressed with match.com either. My opinion was: If I'm going to have to pay a monthly fee to see the same chicks that I see on okcupid or plenty of fish...I'm not paying for match.com. Plus, the only site where I've received any kind of scam/phishing from, was from match. YMMV though.

I have no idea what's with people having kids. If it makes you feel any better, I don't have any of my own. :) But, I hear you. I want my own family too. Sometimes it just doesn't happen right when you want it to.

Really? I've seen a lot more "hey she looks attractive to me" women on match just browsing my "Daily 5" then I have on the other two. Now given, some large % of those wouldn't find me attractive, and some % of them are likely fakers...even factoring that in I think match.com is a much better fishing ground at least locally.

Just feel like I'm getting older...the window is getting smaller. I'm not a model, nor am I a millionaire...so my odds of landing a significantly younger woman as I get older are slim (plus honestly I don't think those types of relationships tend to age well). So I'm starting to get to the point where I feel like the biological clock of girls within like...my "dateable zone" is ticking faster.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

Okstupid: Met an outstanding woman in New York (and a couple nutjobs.) There is currently one woman on there that makes my jaw drop. Didn't reply to me. Cest la Vie.

PoF... It does stand for "Plenty of Fatties." They compress photos so that the preview pic looks inviting, but when you see the actual photo she is twice as wide. As a Jedi once said, big girls are fine... just not for me. (There is a difference between a woman who is "thick" and a woman who doesn't seem to give a damn about how big she is.) Sadly, I have seen women on these sites who list themselves as "thin" or "average" who are well into the Jabba the Hut category.

[MacroGuru]

I met my current GF on PoF and we have been together for over a year...

[DaddyTorgo]

I met my current GF on PoF and we have been together for over a year...

Is she a Hut?

[MacroGuru]

Is she a Hut?

A hut?

[DaddyTorgo]

A hut?

Like Jabba.

[JediKooter]

It's HutT. Two ts... ;)

[MacroGuru]

I don't think so....

[DaddyTorgo]

Apologies...I can't type.

That's cool Macro...I was just messin with ya.

[JediKooter]

Really? I've seen a lot more "hey she looks attractive to me" women on match just browsing my "Daily 5" then I have on the other two. Now given, some large % of those wouldn't find me attractive, and some % of them are likely fakers...even factoring that in I think match.com is a much better fishing ground at least locally.

Just feel like I'm getting older...the window is getting smaller. I'm not a model, nor am I a millionaire...so my odds of landing a significantly younger woman as I get older are slim (plus honestly I don't think those types of relationships tend to age well). So I'm starting to get to the point where I feel like the biological clock of girls within like...my "dateable zone" is ticking faster.

Yes, there were definitely more attractive women on match.com, but, after weeding out the fakes and scammers, the ratio (to me at least in this area) is about the same as okcupid. And it could just be this part of California I'm in too. It's hard to put my finger on it, but, there's definitely something 'wrong' with the women here. It's partially piss poor attitudes and the lack of having their feet firmly planted on the ground of reality, is what I think it is. I do not see this problem with women in Southern California though.

Oh I hear you on that. I think about that too. My personal goal was to be a dad, no later than 35. I'm now 40. I don't want to be like Tony Randall and have a kid when I'm 79. I want to be able to throw a baseball or football or teach the kid how to ride a bike, while I don't have a walker or a hoverround to keep me from falling over and breaking my hip. I want the spawn of Jedikooter to know his or her grandparents before they die. I'm 14, 18 & 21 years older than my sisters and at the rate I'm going, their kids (and they don't have any yet), will have kids before me. So yes, I do hear the tick of that clock as well.

[DaddyTorgo]

At least I have nieces. I just spoil the crap out of them. Too bad they live all the way cross-country now.

[JediKooter]

I'm spoiling myself. :)

[Rizon]

I'm spoiling myself. :)

What a difference a 'p' makes.

[JediKooter]

What a difference a 'p' makes.

The even funnier part was, I made sure I put the 'p' in there as that thought definitely crossed my mind.

[Matthean]

http://images.onlineuniversity.net.s3.amazonaws.com/gamers-get-girls.gif

[Izulde]

This used to be true of IRC roleplaying channels too.

[Matthean]

http://www.mbaprograms.org/imagesvr_ce/765/does%20online%20dating%20work.jpg

[Galaxy]

I saw this problem A LOT on match.com. It got to the point where I could see the cut and pasting going on. Then there's the profiles that use pictures of porn actresses. Pffffft, like I haven't seen my fair share of porn actresses and I'd highly highly doubt one of them would be on a online dating site.

The only thing you got to go on are pictures (if I'm still looking); if I see the "hand-on-hip" or "bathroom reflection" poses, I'll pass. I think I need to hang out with JimmyWint.

[Galaxy]

I've found pretty much the same out here to be honest. PoF is slightly better than OkCupid.

One of these days when I get serious about things I'll have to sign up for Match.com I guess. Seems that that's the only place where the "less than big girls" go.

On a related note...wtf is up with everyone having babies? :( I want babies. My sister has 3 kids. My oldest friend (from kindergarden) just had her first...wtf!?!?! :( I need to meet the right someone and get married and get a family going :cry: .

Boston seems like it can be a trickier place due to demographics and dynamics of the area.

[JediKooter]

The only thing you got to go on are pictures (if I'm still looking); if I see the "hand-on-hip" or "bathroom reflection" poses, I'll pass. I think I need to hang out with JimmyWint.

Ah yes. Makes you wonder what ol JimmyWint is up to these days.

I will also pass on the ones that have more pictures of their dog/s or they only have group pictures with other chicks and they don't say which one they are.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

My fav pics are still the "I am holding up this wall" photos.

[JediKooter]

I'm not quite sure what those are. Are they leaning up against a wall?

[Izulde]

they only have group pictures with other chicks and they don't say which one they are.


In this situation, I assume one or possibly both of the following is true:

1. She's the ugliest girl in the picture.
2. She's the fattest girl in the picture.

[JediKooter]

In this situation, I assume one or possibly both of the following is true:

1. She's the ugliest girl in the picture.
2. She's the fattest girl in the picture.

Ahhhh. Got it.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

I'm not quite sure what those are. Are they leaning up against a wall?

It's where she has her hands on a wall, but is turned to the camera. It's supposed to be to show off her posterior. A nice, natural pose... since that's what people do in real life.

[MacroGuru]

It's where she has her hands on a wall, but is turned to the camera. It's supposed to be to show off her posterior. A nice, natural pose... since that's what people do in real life.

These are my stretchy pants

http://www.spiritualityandpractice.com/films/images/photos/nacholibrelrg3.jpg

[Galaxy]

It's where she has her hands on a wall, but is turned to the camera. It's supposed to be to show off her posterior. A nice, natural pose... since that's what people do in real life.

I guess I need to pay closer to attention to these photos.

[JediKooter]

It's where she has her hands on a wall, but is turned to the camera. It's supposed to be to show off her posterior. A nice, natural pose... since that's what people do in real life.

I can't recall seeing too many of those, but, I'm trying to look at their butt anyway, so it may all just blend in.

[Galaxy]

Ah yes. Makes you wonder what ol JimmyWint is up to these days.

I will also pass on the ones that have more pictures of their dog/s or they only have group pictures with other chicks and they don't say which one they are.

Ask them if they're into kinky stuff?

[JediKooter]

Ask them if they're into kinky stuff?

That's the kind of kinky I stay away from.

[Poli]

Met my wife via eharmony nearly two years ago.

Married in May.

Expecting the baby in July.

It's working for us...much more so than the woman I married after meeting in church and dating for two years. It's quite nearly night and day. Chalk some of it up to maturity or whathaveyou, but I'd likely still be single today without eharmony...and without my first born on the way.


I had a few creepy people along the way.

One girl I dated told me last week she loved me when we were dating...but was afraid of getting 'hurt' by me. She went on to tell me she's jealous of my wife.

It was a few years ago...I'd suggest you get over it.

[JediKooter]

Poli...slaying women's hearts, one eharmony profile at a time. :D

[Pumpy Tudors]

Poli is a mofukin boss!

[Ksyrup]

Is there an AFL dating site? Pumpy could have his own serfdom.

[M GO BLUE!!!]

The worst part about lowering your standards is when the women you don't really want anyway think you are not good enough for them.

[Chief Rum]

The worst part about lowering your standards is when the women you don't really want anyway think you are not good enough for them.

I couldn't handle that, so I just date 10s. Which means I don't have many dates. But, hey, when I do... :D

[sabotai]

I couldn't handle that, so I just date 10s. Which means I don't have many dates. But, hey, when I do... :D

Hey, me too! Except for me, "don't have many dates" = 0.

[Poli]

I needed the HIMYM hot/crazy chart for that one. She was hot hot hot, but had a felony and obviously, a bit crazy.

It is nice to be loved, though.