non-racially insensitive things you'd love to say over a Wal Mart Intercom

[stevew]

Anyone?

I will start:
"Anyone planning to buy a product made by children in a sweat shop, please leave the store"

[Abe Sargent]

Anyone who actually believes in the materialist crap that Saving Money actually does make your Life Better like Wal-Unethicals says, out of the store.

[sterlingice]

So, wait? Are these supposed to be insensitive things that are non-racial? Or anything that isn't racially insensitive?

(EDIT: I'm mkaing this too complicated, aren't I?)

SI

[stevew]

"Anyone wearing pants with an elastic waistband, please leave the store"

[BYU 14]

"Anyone with more Fingers than teeth, please leave the store."

[Pumpy Tudors]

"Bring your friends"

[EagleFan]

Careful, you'll get arrested. What happens if people that are any of those things get violent because of what you said...

[JPhillips]

Respect Arnold Palmer or leave the store.

[BYU 14]

Respect Arnold Palmer or leave the store.

Happy Gilmore says Arnold Palmer is his Bitch.

[NorvTurnerOverdrive]

da roof,
da roof,
da roof is on fi-yah...

no, seriously. there's a fire on the roof. everyone needs to leave.

[Sun Tzu]

"Sometimes, at night, the Ice Weasels come..."

[SteveMax58]

"Attention Raymond...please come to the men's room, stall #2...and bring the rubber gloves and a hammer. Thank you!"

[Senator]

Now I clown around, when I hang around with the Underground...

[molson]

"All Mexicans, please leave the store".

DAMN IT - I'll try again in a few minutes.

[Julio Riddols]

"Attention Customers : Its the weekly Wal-Mart free for all minute! Any Item that leaves the store within the next minute is free of charge, our way of thanking you for making Wal Mart your choice for your everyday needs!"

And I would try to sound as much like a recording as possible.

[Karlifornia]

"All conservatives...please continue opposing our part-time employees the right to affordable health care"

[Apathetic Lurker]

"Anyone wearing pants with an elastic waistband, please leave the store"

What are you trying to do? Empty the store?

[Apathetic Lurker]

"All conservatives...please continue opposing our part-time employees the right to affordable health care"

" Because what we have kills our corporate profit margins "

[Dutch]

"WAL-MART: The High Cost of Low Price Blu-Ray is 50% off through Labor Day."

[albionmoonlight]

Attention to the owner of a [red/blue/white/any common color] mid-sized car with a [whatever state you are in] license plate. Your car has just been hit in the parking lot. Please report to the manager at the front of the store.

[Marc Vaughan]

Could all mobiliyu scooter riders who aren't disabled please get up and walk for a change.

[Easy Mac]

I would read tiger woods' texts... Or paradise lost

[Warhammer]

"Go to Target"

[digamma]

In Lawrence, KS, "Would Ali Farokhmanesh and Kwadzo Ahelegbe leave the store please? Like yesterday."

[stevew]

Attention scooter riders. How much would you pay for a wookie.

[Greyroofoo]

"Show us your hooters!"

[BYU 14]

"Show us your hooters!"

It's all fun and games until some one does, Strippers do not shop at Wal-Mart my friend.

[Abe Sargent]

It's all fun and games until some one does, Strippers do not shop at Wal-Mart my friend.

That's a completely different store in the Walton franchise.

[ColtCrazy]

If you say the Hooters thing at Wal-Mart, you are sure to see multiple pairs. Usually on the same person.

[sterlingice]

"Attention Customers : Its the weekly Wal-Mart free for all minute! Any Item that leaves the store within the next minute is free of charge, our way of thanking you for making Wal Mart your choice for your everyday needs!"

And I would try to sound as much like a recording as possible.

:D

SI

[Sun Tzu]

I would read tiger woods' texts... Or paradise lost

win

[Bad-example]

Attention Wal-Mart customers, all Canadians must leave the store.

[Flasch186]

"Welcome to Wal Mart"

~Im supposedly self employed right now but I feel unemployed :(

[Solecismic]

"Attention Wal-Mart Shoppers: You can find affordable health care in aisle 7, next to the potato chips and cheese doodles."

[Bea-Arthurs Hip]

All Aspartame products are now 1/2 off. Stock up America , it is good for you and tastes great! And dont forget to feed this to your children! They can wash it down with a nice glass of Flouride thats great for their teeth!

Little long but it works.

[Pumpy Tudors]

All Aspartame products are now 1/2 off. Stock up America , it is good for you and tastes great! And dont forget to feed this to your children! They can wash it down with a nice glass of Flouride thats great for their teeth!

Little long but it works.
Your first post here in 4 months, and you decide to use it in this thread?

[Celeval]

Attention Wal-Mart customers: We have a special guest in the store today with us! Our regional manager is disguised as a regular employee - whoever can guess which one, and bring him or her to the customer service desk first will win a $100 gift certificate! Go!

[EagleFan]

Attention Wal-Mart shoppers! Get the fuck out!!!

or

Attention Wal-Mart shoppers! In honor of the most recent movement of our country towards socialism we would like to introduce our Bread Line Special. The first 100 customers in the store today have the right to stand in line for 3 hours with hopes of getting a loaf of bread. Get used to it bitches!!!