Question re: Facebook etiquette

[DaddyTorgo]

Okay, let me try to boil this story down to its essentials.

Had a friend ohh...maybe like 7-10 years ago (god is it really that many?). We fell out of touch for a variety of reasons (she pissed me off one time on my birthday when we were falling out of touch, i went back to school, she went to school and then went overseas to school). We've chatted via email within the last year, amicably...friendly even. But she's married now and living in Boston and I'm living out here in the suburbs and busy with work so we've never actually caught up.

I was just on facebook (where we're friends and exchange the odd comment), and noticed that she's attending a reading at a bookstore literally...1000 yards from my office tonight. She knows I live out this way (maybe not that I'm working so close), but hasn't mentioned it to me or anything.

Is it weird if I show up anyways and be like "yeah I was sending a message to someone else on facebook and noticed you were attending the event and that it was basically next door. thought i'd come say hi?"

This isn't anyone I used to date or anything. We were just like...best friends...hung out every night and worked in adjecent stores for like...3 years or so.

Thoughts?

[MikeVic]

I'd send a quick message first, and if no reply... then if you really wanted to catch up, I'd just show up. But I'd feel weird about showing up without any sort of heads-up.

[Lathum]

It is hard to say without knowing her personality. I think some people would be cool with it and some people may think it is stalkerish.

I would send her a message saying something along the lines of " hey, saw you were going to be at this reading by where I live, want to meet up for a coffee or something?"

If she doesn't reply or comes up with an excuse she probably doesn't want to catch up, if she is cool with it she'll be like, yeah, c'mon down.

[Mustang]

Maybe she only had the time tonight to do the book reading and not knowing you were that close to the bookstore, didn't feel there was any time to get together. I might be more likely to send a comment to her book reading note that "hey, you're 1000 yards from where I work tonight. Have fun." Let her make the decision and try to get together later.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Maybe she only had the time tonight to do the book reading and not knowing you were that close to the bookstore, didn't feel there was any time to get together. I might be more likely to send a comment to her book reading note that "hey, you're 1000 yards from where I work tonight. Have fun." Let her make the decision and try to get together later.

This.

Something like "It caught my eye when you mentioned the bookstore....blah blah blah...1000 yards away....blah blah blah"

Then she either 1) doesn't respond at all 2) says "huh...small world" 3) says "really, we should get together!!"

[Ksyrup]

If you choose to try to meet with her without her knowing you are coming, be sure to leave the duct tape and pliers at home. Just so there's no misunderstanding.

[digamma]

It's weird.

[DaddyTorgo]

LOL oh I'm not really worried she'll think I'm stalkerish. Like I said...we were BFF's for a good 3 years or so not that long ago. Girl probably knows me as well as anyone. And I figured I'd at least make the effort, since we've both sort of said we'd like to catch up, but both have been busy and all.

[Rizon]

Is it weird if I show up anyways and be like "yeah I was sending a message to someone else on facebook and noticed you were attending the event and that it was basically next door. thought i'd come say hi?"

Very weird. Don't do it.

[Swaggs]

Weird.

[Ronnie Dobbs2]

Not sure if it's piling on at this point, but don't show up without confirming with her first that its cool.

[DaddyTorgo]

LOL.

Aaah...I'll do what I'll do I'm sure. And I'm not really worried about the weirdness of it - she knows me in that regard, at least as well as anyone.

We'll see. I usually have a post-work tea at the starbucks right next door, so I mentioned that in my email to her. Odds are that she'd stop in there for old time's sake anyways.

[Mustang]

And I figured I'd at least make the effort, since we've both sort of said we'd like to catch up, but both have been busy and all.

Catching up shouldn't interfere with her plans that she already made. If someone I hadn't seen in a long time showed up suddenly before I had plans, I'd feel pretty bad that I was about to blow them off.

[Suburban Rhythm]

Also, without pictures, not sure anyone can truly say whether it is worthwhile.

[DaddyTorgo]

Of course not. If I went to the book reading I'd go to the book reading. LOL. Sounded somewhat interesting anyways.

[DaddyTorgo]

Also, without pictures, not sure anyone can truly say whether it is worthwhile.

She's married. Furthermore we'd long since established I had no shot with her, and that's why we were able to be BFF's.

She used to be a Suicide Girl...so if that type does it for you, you'd probably like.

[Rizon]

Best Answer - Chosen by Voters
Also, without pictures, not sure anyone can truly say whether it is worthwhile.
85% 65 Votes

[Rizon]

She's married. Furthermore we'd long since established I had no shot with her, and that's why we were able to be BFF's.



There's no point in going then. Unless you can get her sister as your date for this ... bookreading.

[DaddyTorgo]

Hah. She gchatted back to me that she can't make it after all cuz she has no car these days but she'd love to catch up when I'm in the city.

Good stuff.

[lordscarlet]

I would just post on the thing where she said she was going and say, "Hey! that's 1000 yards from my office!" and take it from there

[Swaggs]

Also weird: adult men using the term "BFFs." ;)

[DaddyTorgo]

Also weird: adult men using the term "BFFs." ;)

lol

[RainMaker]

Much better off sending a message saying you noticed she'd be in the neighborhood and wondering if she wanted to meet up. I would not pop-in unexpectedly at all.

[Pumpy Tudors]

Since she's not going to the book reading, my thoughts on that are moot. If you want to get this friendship back to where it was, though, make sure to tell her that at least 3 of your Facebook friends have beaten off to her SuicideGirl pics.

[DaddyTorgo]

Since she's not going to the book reading, my thoughts on that are moot. If you want to get this friendship back to where it was, though, make sure to tell her that at least 3 of your Facebook friends have beaten off to her SuicideGirl pics.

LOL - roger that. Hell...I'd point you to them if I could remember what her username or whatever for that used to be.

[spleen1015]

WTF is a Suicide Girl?

[JediKooter]

Whatever you do, I'm sure Pumpy will have the best advice. I'm going to see if he will let me hire him as my consigliere.

[DaddyTorgo]

WTF is a Suicide Girl?

Best I could ever figure it out (and I didn't spend much time trying) it's like...punk-rock softcore porn?

[JediKooter]

WTF is a Suicide Girl?

NWSF, but, when you get home, depending on if you like your women tatted and pierced, you may like them.

[Rizon]

WTF is a Suicide Girl?

hxxp://lmgtfy.com/?q=suicide+girls

[Rizon]

Best I could ever figure it out (and I didn't spend much time trying) it's like...punk-rock non-nude softcore porn?

Very nude, btw. And slutty.

[Mustang]

non-nude softcore porn?

WTF is the point of non-nude softcore porn?

[DaddyTorgo]

Oh okay. Like I said...I only spent a couple minutes on the site to figure out wtf is was way back when. Didn't realize it was nudity.

Edited my post to remove that part.

[JediKooter]

Oh and I think most of them are natural for the most part. Don't remember seeing too many store bought boobs on that site.

[DaddyTorgo]

Aaah. Not really my thing (although this friend was definitely hot in her day).

[Autumn]

Oh okay. Like I said...I only spent a couple minutes on the site to figure out wtf is was way back when. Didn't realize it was nudity.

Edited my post to remove that part.

So you're telling me you had a hot, female friend who modeled for a Web site filled with explicit nudity ... and you never checked out her pictures? Even if you just thought they were hot erotic non nudes? Everybody who would not look at explicit pictures of a hot woman they know, raise your hands!

:confused:

[DaddyTorgo]

So you're telling me you had a hot, female friend who modeled for a Web site filled with explicit nudity ... and you never checked out her pictures? Even if you just thought they were hot erotic non nudes? Everybody who would not look at explicit pictures of a hot woman they know, raise your hands!

:confused:

Nope. Never checked them out. Saw pretty much every inch of her outside of nips & lips in course of hanging out though. But again - it totally wasn't about that. We were too close of friends.

I'll poke around tonight and see if I can figure out a way to find them for you pervs though. I'm sure she hasn't modeled on there for years and years though, so they're probably not up. I'd prolly have to find an archive of them from like 2004 or something.

[spleen1015]

What was her porn name? We can find her.

You are a better man than me, dude. If I had a hot friend who was nekkid online, I would be all over that.

[Ronnie Dobbs2]

So you're telling me you had a hot, female friend who modeled for a Web site filled with explicit nudity ... and you never checked out her pictures? Even if you just thought they were hot erotic non nudes? Everybody who would not look at explicit pictures of a hot woman they know, raise your hands!

:confused:

QFT. Mind blowing.

[DaddyTorgo]

What was her porn name? We can find her.

You are a better man than me, dude. If I had a hot friend who was nekkid online, I would be all over that.

That's the thing - if I remembered her suicide girls name I'd tell you and you could find it. I forget it though...will have to see if I can connect the dots somehow.

Browse through some other Boston-area ones and see if any have her lsited as a friend and her stuff is still up there or whatever.

[DaddyTorgo]

QFT. Mind blowing.

LOL...well what can I say. I'm an odd duck.

[Izulde]

Nope. Never checked them out. Saw pretty much every inch of her outside of nips & lips in course of hanging out though. But again - it totally wasn't about that. We were too close of friends.

I'll poke around tonight and see if I can figure out a way to find them for you pervs though. I'm sure she hasn't modeled on there for years and years though, so they're probably not up. I'd prolly have to find an archive of them from like 2004 or something.

When it comes to hot, naked chicks, there's no such thing as too close of friends.

[Mustang]

Thankfully I'm not that close of a friend to any female where it would prohibit me from searching out naked pictures of them on the internet.

[Ksyrup]

That's the thing - if I remembered her suicide girls name I'd tell you and you could find it. I forget it though...will have to see if I can connect the dots somehow.

Browse through some other Boston-area ones and see if any have her lsited as a friend and her stuff is still up there or whatever.

Send her a FB message telling her you might come over to the book reading to see her and asking if she can tell you her SG screen name because some guys on a computer game message board want to check her out. :D

[DaddyTorgo]

Send her a FB message telling her you might come over to the book reading to see her and asking if she can tell you her SG screen name because some guys on a computer game message board want to check her out. :D

I'll mention that when we do hang out. Of course I'm assuming that now that she's married and has a more "upstanding" job that she's taken them down and all.

She's also no longer all punk rock.

[Rizon]

Everybody who would not look at explicit pictures of a hot woman they know, raise your hands!

:confused:
..

[DaddyTorgo]

I'm so good...found it for you pervs

go there and search for "Kera"


I'm not a member or anything, but there they are.

[sovereignstar v2]

Ooo.. I bet I could find that lezzie set w/o signing up.

[sovereignstar v2]

lol.. took less than a minute.

[DaddyTorgo]

lol.. took less than a minute.

LOL. Aaaah the internet.

[sovereignstar v2]

http://openhippo.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/Recycle_Bin1.png

[Dodgerchick]

If you guys were BFFs for 3 yrs. or so... I'd show up and say, "hah, you can't hide from me!" *evil laugh* But that's just me. It depends on the person though, some ppl don't like that kind of thing.

[Autumn]

Yeah, I'm not sure about this whole thing. If you guys are BFFs it's not really an etiquette question, that's more for lesser acquaintances. And when people were like "Oh no, don't just show up," you were like, "Nah, it'd be no problem, we're good like that." So what was your question?

You should have just led with "I know this chick who was a Suicide Girl. Want to see some pics?"

[DaddyTorgo]

Yeah, I'm not sure about this whole thing. If you guys are BFFs it's not really an etiquette question, that's more for lesser acquaintances. And when people were like "Oh no, don't just show up," you were like, "Nah, it'd be no problem, we're good like that." So what was your question?

You should have just led with "I know this chick who was a Suicide Girl. Want to see some pics?"

I dunno why the question. I guess I just wanted to see what others thought kinda? I dunno. My brain is totally fried these days.

[RainMaker]

If you do show up unannounced, the resulting thread about how to fight a restraining order would be fun.

[stevew]

I think she probably has a different idea of catching up than you do. Sometimes people say "we should catch up" but don't really mean it.

[DaddyTorgo]

who knows *shrugs*

not losing any sleep over it or anything, it'd just be interesting.

[Autumn]

I dunno why the question. I guess I just wanted to see what others thought kinda? I dunno. My brain is totally fried these days.

You need ... more Werewolf!

[NorvTurnerOverdrive]

If you do show up unannounced, the resulting thread about how to fight a restraining order would be fun.
i'm trying to bang this broad hendry!

if you were just 'friends' (which any hetero will say is impossible) you wouldn't be apprehensive.

but hey, go for it. it's your fantasy.

[DaddyTorgo]

i'm trying to bang this broad hendry!

if you were just 'friends' (which any hetero will say is impossible) you wouldn't be apprehensive.

but hey, go for it. it's your fantasy.

LMAO

Absolutely not impossible. A good...66% of my closest friends in the world are women that I have absolutely no desire to have sex with. In fact I'd literally turn it down, without a second's thought.

And I dunno...just wanted to see if folks thought it'd be super-weird. Although I guess since there really aren't that many women on this board I wasn't likely to get an answer that was from a woman's POV.

[DanGarion]

I'm so good...found it for you pervs

go there and search for "Kera"


I'm not a member or anything, but there they are.

I see no Kera, I see a Kyra though. Oh and for the record Suicide Girls rocks.

[DanGarion]

NM found it. Not bad not bad.