Offer of Employment

[Poli]

I'm getting one tomorrow from a smaller company in the same field as I'm currently in (HVAC controls). I'm assuming they will offer at least a 10% pay increase.

Any suggestions on what else I could/should ask for? Serious and comical suggestions welcome.

[Apathetic Lurker]

Midget strippers with flat heads

[CrimsonFox]

Congrats, dude! That's awesome!

Can't hurt to ask for more than you made last time as long as you don't go overboard. Then again depends on how deep their pockets are.

[Sun Tzu]

You could go the Chief Wiggum route and ask for a free pig every month.

Personally, I wouldn't settle for anything less than a shmoke and a pancake.

[Lathum]

I would inquire about better benefits.

[Surtt]

I always wanted a pony.

[Suicane75]

A leotard, a stick of butter and a poster of Randy Spears are a must at any job I'm applying for.

[Karlifornia]

Ask them if they'll take off their band-aids because you don't believe in touchdowns. If they say no, tell them you're quite a quiet domino, bury me now."

If they say "I don't know what you;re talking about," lop their heads off with a machete.

[Suicane75]

Just sit there slowly repeating the phrase Yankee Hotel Foxtrot for minutes on end. Then squeal.

[Cap Ologist]

Ask them if you can set up a series of agility drills for your fellow employees so you can decide which ones you want to work with. Also, ask them if you have to deal with parents.

[Honolulu Blue]

Get everything in writing.

[Sun Tzu]

Tell them your solecismic score is off the charts, and your AI prefers front-loaded contracts over back-loaded.

[BYU 14]

Ask them if you can set up a series of agility drills for your fellow employees so you can decide which ones you want to work with. Also, ask them if you have to deal with parents.

Add a new monogrammed stopwatch to this request!

[claphamsa]

im not sure about your industry... but if they will let you work flex time, something like that could be very valuable.

[Poli]

I accepted the job. It's just over a 15% increase in pay. Given the irregular hours I had last year, it's virtually more than a 40% increase.

[Pumpy Tudors]

but did they offer you booty
if no, bad deal
sorry bro

[MizzouRah]

Congratulations!!!

[Sun Tzu]

I want chicken I want liver meow mix meow mix please deliver.

[molson]

but did they offer you booty
if no, bad deal
sorry bro

You're not going to get booty for an HVAC controls gig until you're about 10 years in.

[Marc Vaughan]

Congrats on the offer - if you're so inclined and its not 'unusual' within your industry I'd recommend trying to ensure a decent notice period from the company ..... personal masseuse and a private office might be nice also :D

[Warhammer]

Out of curiosity, where is the job? You doing balancing controls, ATCs, or what?

[tarcone]

Congrats. Still traveling through my town?

[sterlingice]

Congrats. I know you had mentioned issues with the old job but I thought those were smoothed out.

SI

[JediKooter]

Congrats Poli!!

[Poli]

Out of curiosity, where is the job? You doing balancing controls, ATCs, or what?

St. Louis area still. Temperature controls mostly. I'm not sure what else I will be dabbling in, but it appears to be the same line of work I have been performing.

Tarc, still a possibilty for me to go down that way. I'll have to see what we service that way and let you know.

[EagleFan]

Grats!

[Warhammer]

St. Louis area still. Temperature controls mostly. I'm not sure what else I will be dabbling in, but it appears to be the same line of work I have been performing.

Tarc, still a possibilty for me to go down that way. I'll have to see what we service that way and let you know.


Cool! I sell balancing equipment so CBVs and the like fall into my purview.

[Passacaglia]

I also offered Poli some employment....in Football Manager! I signed a 35 year old fullback named Poli to play for my Worcester squad in the Blue Square Premier. Despite his age, he's played in all 8 games so far, 4 wins and 4 draws, good enough to put us in 2nd place!