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View Full Version : Things that sound dirty ... but aren't !

DougW
08-04-2012, 08:37 PM
Stumbling around some jokes on the net, and ran into this category. Was thinking some of the clever minds around here may have more :).

Examples (a few that made me laugh) :

(work) : Just stick it in my box.
(work) : I want it on my desk, NOW !!
(golf) : You really whacked the hell out of that sucker.
(golf) : Keep your head down and spread your legs a bit more
(golf) : Hold up... I need to wash my balls first.
(lawyer) : For $200 an hour, she better be good !
(to lawyer) : Think you can get me off?
Nugget699
08-04-2012, 08:43 PM
Bollard.
Lathum
08-04-2012, 09:01 PM
anytime in basketball a player gets a short rest and they say he is "getting a blow"
rowech
08-04-2012, 09:15 PM
anytime in basketball a player gets a short rest and they say he is "getting a blow"

The very first one I thought of. Followed by, "he gave him the high, hard one."
Critch
08-04-2012, 09:30 PM
In the UK the word "fanny" means "ladies front bottom parts". So when I arrived in the US the first time a lady mentioned getting her "fanny pack", I giggled like a schoolboy for about 25 minutes.
JonInMiddleGA
08-04-2012, 10:58 PM
Chinese Olympic Trampoline star Dong Dong.
Radii
08-04-2012, 11:09 PM
In the UK the word "fanny" means "ladies front bottom parts". So when I arrived in the US the first time a lady mentioned getting her "fanny pack", I giggled like a schoolboy for about 25 minutes.

I keep staring at this trying to figure out why you decided to type "ladies front bottom parts". :D
fantom1979
08-05-2012, 12:34 AM
When I worked at home depot:

What is the best way to screw this stud?
Critch
08-05-2012, 04:33 AM
I keep staring at this trying to figure out why you decided to type "ladies front bottom parts". :D

You're right, it should be "lady's front bottom parts".
QuikSand
08-05-2012, 07:22 AM
asphalt
sterlingice
08-05-2012, 08:51 AM
Chinese Olympic Trampoline star Dong Dong.

Headline this morning: "China's Dong flips and twists to trampoline gold"

That sounds painful

SI
Autumn
08-05-2012, 08:58 AM
Ordering coffee:

"I'll have a tall, dark Italian."
molson
08-05-2012, 10:20 AM
Caulk
Suicane75
08-05-2012, 02:15 PM
Sheep Control, for starters.

Edit: It might be dirty for all I know, I'm not about to find out.
Noop
08-05-2012, 02:20 PM
Food - Can I get extra meat?
JPhillips
08-05-2012, 07:39 PM
From the beach:

The turtle's in the hole
terpkristin
08-05-2012, 09:44 PM
Titillating

/tk
GrantDawg
08-06-2012, 06:10 AM
Wankel Rotary Engine
Groundhog
08-06-2012, 06:38 AM
Another from basketball "He's going backdoor"
terpkristin
08-06-2012, 01:11 PM
"I've spent a lot of time in my career burning nuts." -Chef Anne Burrell talking about roasting almonds

/tk
BlackJack
08-06-2012, 03:37 PM
cumquat.
molson
08-06-2012, 03:45 PM
Pumpy Tudors
PilotMan
08-19-2012, 05:19 PM
From MMA

Rear Naked Choke
Autumn
08-19-2012, 08:47 PM
From MMA

Rear Naked Choke

Yeah, nothing dirty about the homoerotic names those sweaty half naked guys choose for the ways in which they grab each other's bodies in front of a crowd.
Pumpy Tudors
08-19-2012, 08:48 PM
Pumpy Tudors
sterlingice
08-19-2012, 08:51 PM
Pumpy Tudors

You already had your turn

SI
Pumpy Tudors
08-19-2012, 09:16 PM
Pumpy Tooters
sachmo71
08-20-2012, 12:29 PM
All-Beef Patty
ntndeacon
08-20-2012, 12:41 PM
tittle
ColtCrazy
08-20-2012, 04:48 PM
We had a quote wall on the board during my summer job in England. One girl was talking about being head chaperone to another person when we wrote down this.


"You've never done head before? It's so easy!"

Needless to say she never came into the faculty room without being teased about that.
JediKooter
08-20-2012, 05:29 PM
Masticating Pumpy