Yup, somewhere in heaven your 5th grade teacher is nodding knowingly.

I hope when all this is done people will appreciate their teachers more.. but I'm guessing if that happens at all, it'll be like 5 weeks before they start acting like assholes to them again.

There will be tons of appreciation for the teachers. There will be praise for the special skill set that they have Now as far as an increase in pay and providing them with the quality resources needed to do their jobs goes... okay I will save that for another thread.

I am interested in what the takeaways are from this time for both parents and for educators. I hope both groups are learning valuable lessons. To be fair on parents, teaching is a full time job that most of us have no training or the experience to do the job well. I don't think it is a slight on any parent to say so. That being said, I hope some parents are seeing that sometimes their perfect little angels are not so perfect in the classroom and that there are days when the kids just decided it is not a good day to do any learning.

As far as educators go, I hope they are understanding the difficult circumstances some of their students are trying to learn in. I listened on a one of my son's zoom session that included his whole class. I have no idea how one of the girls in the class gets anything accomplished based on the noises I heard of her home environment Some teachers are noticing some students actually understanding their work more now that when they were in the classroom due to the difference in teaching online. Add to that the number of smart devices that were issued by the state, how many students still struggled to get consistent internet service throughout the year and how many students showed up to get lunch every day, this has exposed a number of gaps that won't be solved by just getting the kids back into the classroom.

Believe me, teachers know this. The educational administration on the other hand...

I have always had appreciation for my kids teachers and never taken them for granted. Never once have we argued that they need to be challenged, or it must be the other kids, etc...When my son was diagnosed with ADHD we listened to everything the teacher told us and worked with her. It was an amazing experience.

That being said I realize we are likely the minority.

And almost on cue I get an email from my sons teacher that says

"I just wanted to send you a quick note to let you know that I'm really proud of Colin! He stands out to me as an active participant during our live lessons! He's always raising his hand and offering his ideas. He has also been doing a wonderful job with all of his assignments. I love that Colin is choosing to make the best of this situation and continuing to learn and grow as much as possible! I also know this is a crazy time, so I really appreciate all of your support.

Have a great day!"

Really proud of my boy.

I always wonder about those parents who challenge the teachers when they say their kids aren't doing well or are acting up in class. Like, what do they hope to accomplish? Don't they realize that kids are (generally) manipulative bastards that will lie to get their way (every kid that I've seen will try to play off mom vs. dad to get candy at least) ;).

Let's just go ahead and stipulate that the veracity of the poll can be questioned due to the results matching the desired outcome of the group that paid for it ... but there it is regardless.

My own suspicion is that the results aren't so much due to the experiences with learning from home as much as they are a reflection of the attitude of parents toward the lockdown itself, an increased mistrust of anything related to government.

Right now, we're on the side of caution and have asked what our options are w.r.t. school in the fall. All of the new info coming out about the odd diseases potentially related to COVID-19 in kids is concerning. That's not the way we want to go, but feel it's something we can do to help keep them safe. As we get closer to schools opening, we'll reevaluate that position.

And I agree, homeschooling is for the birds. Our kids are pretty good with doing their work, but there's still a lot of interaction from us that needs to be done to get the work completed.

Also, we're also following the vaccine trials closely. I can't see getting it early to be a guinea pig. Too many cases of rushed medications having unforeseen long-term consequences.

Went to the mall to get my haircut. It wasn't busy at all but the parking at the front entrance was half-full. Saw most people coming out wearing masks.

The hair salon was not busy at all. They marked off every other chair. There was another customer and everyone was wearing masks and kept them on. Today was the first day and she told me they had a day of training. I could see someone wiping down the register and credit card machine.

Glad to get my haircut !!

Homeschooling is haphazard at best. I must commend the teachers though for trying to have zoom gatherings for the kids to interact.

My son's teacher actually spent about 40 minutes one on one on face-time because he's been emotional lately.

It's all about routine though...the more you keep a routine the better off you are, there's nowhere to go so it's vital to keep the kids moving into activities.

Of course, it's raining this weekend, so they'll be cooped up.

I didn't watch it (not a golf fan) but appreciate the first steps to normalcy for sports. Tennis should work well also.

Don't know what will happen to Football, Basketball, Baseball, Soccer but I'm guessing that Baseball & Soccer can be played with some modified rules and stringent testing.

https://www.cnn.com/2020/05/26/sport...ntl/index.html

FWIW, I'm planning a 6+ day solo backpacking trip in the Appalachian mountains. Sometime in late July and it depends on work and the pandemic. Need to get out into nature and figure by late July things will be much better. If not I'll postpone.

There'll be people on the trail but most times there's social distancing by default. I plan to tent vs use the shelter and don't plan to go into any town.

I did a 6 day backpacking trip around the presidential range when I was an older teenager (with a group obviously). Good times.

I've always wanted to go back and I need to before my body gets too old on me.

I missed this one before. I feel for you dude, at that age it is SO hard to keep them even mildly disciplined and focused. Stay strong!

I find we are branching out a bit more. Doing play dates at the pool and letting the kids go over to a friends across the street to play outside. Driveway happy hours while kids bike in the street (we live on a cul de sac). Adults still somewhat social distancing. No hugs, handshakes, etc...but loosening up for sure. I just don't think we can keep the kids cooped up and not seeing friends. I realize it is somewhat of a risk but I thin at this point it is an acceptable one.

When you say pool is that a friend's pool or community pool? We've been discussing if we want to risk going our community pool even if they restrict capacity and what is a our point of view on masks.

Sorry. Our pool in my backyard. I wouldn't be comfortable using a community pool. We are still limiting interaction to our core group of friends/ kids friends. I still have no interest to go anywhere there would be a crowd. Keep in mind I am also in NJ.

Honestly, I feel more locked down then at any point. Mostly because the first signs of life around me, but I'm locked down more than ever (RI is #1 in % of current population infected with COVID-19)

With my upcoming disability hearing as well, it's just, all stress all the time (and the temperature being so weird doesn't help, we had snow a couple days ago and it's close to 90 today!)

We had our house cleaner come today for the first time in 3 months. We kept up OK with the bathrooms and such, but man, it is so nice to have a super clean house. Also nice to know she is back to work and making some money. Felt like seeing an old friend.

After a week of pure exhaustion from dealing with ... ya know, I finally got back into the kitchen today. I don’t know what it means but I feel so much better mentally after cooking meals for the family today.

I never stopped mine from cleaning my house. Her husband used to work for me on the farm and after I shut down he went to work in a factory and got furloughed during this. I still feel some moral obligation to help out if I can with old employees. I probably would have paid her anyway if she didn’t want to clean but she insisted and I got a clean house out of it. Definitely love the feeling coming home to a spotless house.

The company dropped the 2nd displacement bid on us today. The last one affected close to 5000 guys, and handed me a future 35k pay cut. This one downgrades another 1500+ captains and wide body FO's (the union stated that they convinced the company to basically half this bid in the last few hours, so it could've been much bigger), either as a pay cut to a smaller plane, or a cut to the right seat from the left. That will, in turn, push the people, already at the bottom of now fattened categories, even further down, and set up a 3rd round of bidding at the end of the month.

That 3rd round will ultimately decide the fates of a 2-3k pilots, who will hit the streets, for estimates of 12-24 months.

I've been in a better place, as it looked like things might be favorable for me making it, but the fact that I'm still in the thick of this, that nobody below a certain seniority (above me) has been trained as a result of the last bid, and that they simply aren't being very transparent with us on what the plan is for us. I think that part of it is that we're in contract negotiations, and they would love for us to take a concessionary contract, when just a few months ago, everyone had been working toward a longer term deal. I just don't see how the union is going to willingly give away anything when it takes about 10 years to get any of it back.

As Petty said, "the waiting is the hardest part." Trying to enjoy my time as we count down to the middle on heading off to college, and along with his life, and the breakdown of our amazing 5-member family that I hold near and dear to my heart. I realized it a couple days ago. It's over. For years, I've said, "slow down" and "don't grow up so fast" and "don't take them away from me so soon" and "eat up every moment" and "don't blink". Well, now...it's past us. We won't ever get those times back, and all we have is the path in front where we watch them navigate adulthood, and we hope they get to come home to visit and have dinner, and sit and talk with us. Gone are the days of every day, where we talked and strategized and played games together. It's like that for one this year, and this time next year it'll be like that again, and my heart will have been ripped from my chest. Where now as I reflect on all that, tears fill my eyes, and I can't hope but to yearn for those younger innocent days where all I did was live in fear of the reality that I now find myself in.

Tough times. We’re a few years away with our oldest. Want it to come as slowly as possible. Sorry you’re going through strife with your livelihood too. Hang in there.

So thanks to, umm, that other thread I posted in earlier, my mental health cycling in the past few weeks probably makes a little more sense :)

But today DID have something that was definitely good for my state of mind: first time to walk in and have lunch at a former go-to spot in about 23 years give or take.

Just a local dive that was down the block from our old office many years ago. About all that's changed was the permanent smoke cloud that hovered over the bar, and some additional interior lighting, and the switch from booths to tables. Otherwise though, it was still a damned good burger and still some of the best fried mozz sticks I've had anywhere.

And a great discussion with Will about how what his life -- in Athens as well as his years in Oxford -- lacked was enough places like this one "where normal people go do normal things ... 'cause neither town has much in the way of normal people".

That eventually translated into how both of "his" towns had really lacked any sort of serious "neighborhood vibe" kinda joints, that neither town was the sort of place where there was a lot of "Hey Norm" going to take place.

Good food, laid back meal, it was just ... mentally healthy.

FWIW, hang in there. I know I can't really appreciate what you guys are going through but do wish you & yours the best. Hope your son is doing good also.

Not really mental health but somewhat related to BLM so thought I would post here anyway and see if you guys have any suggestions.

Have some drama going on right now with a daughter's school friend. Friend is 18 and has graduated from HS, works part-time at local grocery store, planning to go to community college. Wife and I have met friend several times, no problem.

Last night daughter asked if we can put up friend in our house.

Apparently friend and father-stepmom-grandmom had tense exchanges (household has siblings and step-siblings also). Friend is a girl but is transgender and for the past 2 years at least, has been dressing/acting/asked to be referred to as a boy. Wife and I have heard enough to know the family situation isn't all that great. It's not like physical abuse, from what I know dad is a hard working guy with many mouths to feed, I picture him as the typical white, GA conservative type guy. I met the guy once when I (with daughter) picked up friend. I've also texted him to let him know I was picking up friend etc. So he knows of me but we are barely acquaintances.

There's been other incidents resulting in the friend living with grandmom for a short period of time. There has been tension because dad is struggling with friend's gender-identity situation. From what we know, last night came to a head because of something friend said about BLM-cops etc. Apparently an uncle is a cop and dad-stepmom-grandmom didn't appreciate friend's view of uncle & cops.

This situation seems to be a significant escalation because grandmom is pissed off at friend too (whereas previously friend would stay with grandmom). Don't know all the details but you get the idea.

Wife and I told daughter that yes friend can stay with us. We have a finished basement with room and bath but (1) it's going to be a limited time of 7 days (2) after that, if it doesn't get better we'll help friend find an apt, go to Texas where there's another relative, or any other option but we don't really know right now (3) we tell dad we are taking friend in, give contact info, be transparent about this (4) friend has to abide by the typical rules of no smoking, drinking, drugs etc.

Daughter said okay and let friend know. We were thinking we would have to pick friend up last night but daughter told us last night that friend will stay at house for now but things may change tomorrow (e.g. today).

Taking care of friend, giving safe place to stay, helping friend go to Texas isn't the worry. My concern I guess is how to deal with dad.

I could see him taking this wrong re: butting into his business, enabling his kid to do things he disagrees with etc. Or he could see it as someone trying to help, give time for people to calm down etc.

If we go pick up friend today, we plan on taking 2 cars where wife-daughter-friend will leave and if needed, I will stay to talk to dad and let him vent etc.

Any thoughts on how you would approach dad?

To add to the fun, taking my daughter to a permitted, peaceful BLM protest today in my suburbia town. We've tried to go before twice but those were cancelled.

Apparently there was one yesterday and saw some news clips. Not a lot of protesters, saw cops on the road, saw cops on roof of building, my guess is 20-30 protesters with signs. They were behind barricades waving signs.

He's an adult at 18. You don't owe his dad anything. I wouldn't even address it. What I would do is sit with the friend and talk about everything. If you're willing to bring him into the home then you have to set the boundaries and expectations up front, as an adult. That's where I would leave it too. You seem to have the rest thought out to your standards, but his family doesn't come into play here at all. You don't owe them anything.

TBH I have a concern that if I don't try to have the discussion with dad at friends house, dad may show up at my house and things escalate from there. Obviously better to head that off.

I don't really know how real that concern is but I could see that happening if he thinks I'm butting into his business.

1) How his Dad responds should have nothing to do with you. He has no legal recourse, one way or the other. He should be able to handle his own shit. Fuck him if he's got his own set of issues.

2) Adult decisions have adult consequences. Kids who turn 18 aren't kids anymore in the eyes of the world. They are adults. Parents don't have the same luxury to know those things about their kids, especially if they aren't dealing with them as adults.

3) Are you butting into his business though? You were asked if you can house an adult friend. You handled that. You don't need to know, or understand anything beyond that to be in your situation. Your house, your expectations.

Went to the protest at the courthouse. I was surprised at the number, my swag is 100+. Barricades separating road from sidewalk, fair number of cops. I saw a couple cops on rooftops. Good diverse crowd and many with small children, a couple with strollers. Everyone had mask but admittedly 6ft social distancing rule was broken.

Lots of cars driving by. The anti-protesters gave thumbs down, middle finger, honking etc.

All in all a good experience, definitely peaceful with shouting and signs, no signs of police aggressiveness. Daughter got sunburned some so need to do SPF 50 next time. In the car she said there were rumors the KKK may hold a counter protest and I was thinking she should have told me about that earlier.

Man,what a year. First covid, then the race issues, and now Iowa football.

Im at my limit. I cannot take another kick to the balls. Can we just fast forward to 2021?

FWIW, quick update on what I posted above. A little more drama past several days but friend is staying with parents for now with the goal of getting out of dodge soon. Friend is planning more.

Honestly it doesn't really seem that the parents are unreasonable here. Just keep your thoughts to yourself especially if you know you are going to piss off people with your talk about BLM and cops especially when your uncle is a cop ... and you are not independent. Don't go out of your way to offend the family who is still taking care of you.

Last day of school for my kids. I am obviously relieved but all I can think about as I drink my coffee is how incredibly proud I am of them to have handled this all so well. Way better than I would have as a kid.

Goodness gracious, I think most everyone here has been out for about a month now (some even more).

This is actually closer to the schedule I had back in olden tymes but it seems almost strange now having gotten accustomed to the modern schedule of getting out somewhere in May.

*I prefer Labor Day start, early June finish but that's rare around here anymore

We are actually finishing 3 days early, they gave us unused snow days

Easily a throwback to my childhood. We would out around this time and then comeback the Wednesday before Labor Day. Absolutely hated that shit.

School here finished May 11th and online learning was as absolutely useless as you probably think it would be. We have used NTI days to make up for some snow days so as not to push school into June, but those are few and far between. Using the same process for everyday school is a waste.

It's funny - on the college level, my other daughter also finished school off campus and you can tell how worthless it was because nearly every college sports team is posting about record-breaking team GPAs.

My wife finally finished last Thursday. People weren’t doing their shit remotely so she had to keep reporting. Situation is so stupid. There wasn’t a single thing she did In the physical building that she couldn’t do online.

At our PS, the guidance was a student could not get lower than what he/she had before going on remote learning. The student can only improve his/her grade.

My daughter already had all A's so she was cruising through her final senior semester.

Picked up a 10 piece bucket at Popeye's. As I waited at the drive thru, I saw 3 workers. There was one at the cash register and she had her blue mask on.

There was the guy at the window who had his mask hanging off one ear. There was a woman filling orders & putting them in the boxes. Her mask was "on" but it was pulled below her lips. I could see her putting pieces of chicken in the boxes and just imagining all the nice covid aerosol floating down into the chicken.

There was a "let us know how we are doing" website by the window. I'm tempted to report this.

BTW - my 10 piece bucket did not come from her but considering how lax things were I don't think I'll be going back anytime soon.

Shifted this post out of the Fuck Cancer thread into this one, cause it just seems to fit better here.

I'm (obviously) not the important factor in the current equation here with my wife & all but I gotta tell ya, I'm steadily not doing great with this as tomorrow approaches. My nerves are shot to the point of being downright queasy. The list of minutiae that I'm stressing over borders on the absurd (and maybe on the wrong side of that border). Easier than stressing over THE big shit I imagine.

But fuck me, I'm accustomed to a certain level of personal dysfunction. This is waaaaaay past that level. I ain't as young as I was in her first battle with it I guess, and I'm coping (a term I use loosely) with it very differently. I think that time I was so openly terrified about it all that it was less internalized to some extent. This time, I'm probably more outwardly calm but more fucked up inside.

I feel like a longtailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs.

FWIW, This sounds like a pretty normal reaction to me. The feeling of being the person who is "supposed" to hold things together can be daunting. I suspect that it is even more difficult when we are not in a very normal period of time and the silly things that could be distracting i.e. sports, games etc are not available or are not working. Hang in there.

Starting to get pissed at my parents, Mom in particular.

they decided to host their annual July 4th BBQ. They usually invitr 100 people, gets crowded. Talked to her today and only 30 confirmed so far, so thats good I suppose. They have a big yard and will be easy to distance. I am not sure we are going and I told her that today. I just don't get the point in having it though. My dad is almost 90. Seems unnecessary. Then to top it all off, she tells me my Aunt and her husband are flying in from Minnesota for it, and staying with them for a week.

WTF.

In good news, I think I finally won a years long battle with a clogged floor drain. I probably should have called someone 14 bottles of drain-o ago. The other night I was elbow deep trying to figure out why it wasn’t going down. I ended up pulling out 2 fist sized chunks of white death that looked like blue cheese. And it still was barely draining. And of course nothing being open 24/7 meant that I couldn’t even go and get a snake or a new plunger til the morning. Like Wal Mart has to go back to 24 hour service. They’ve killed every other business in the world. 8:30pm ain’t cutting it. Anyways the next day I grabbed some CO2 powered death machine plunger thing and some drain clearing granules and I’m thinking merry Christmas the war is over.

I had a long term fight with the 3rd bathroom down in our basement. it hasn't drained properly in 15 years.

Finally I got the room completely cleaned out, opened the floor drain, removed the toilet and sink completely and filled the drains with hydraulic cement (with something blocking the exits so it wouldn't just flop down the pipe)

since then, no water, no muck from our main floor disposal backing up, just nice dry basement.

As for mental health...I have 2 nights left before my first vacation of the new fiscal year. I'm taking 12 day break from this shit. I need it. I'm seriously brain fried.

I did the same Thursday/Friday, Monday/Tuesday. I don’t think I took long enough off :(