I don't understand why people get paid to make movies like this?

Armless (2010) - IMDb

Seriously? A comedy about a guy who wants to cut off his arms? Oh, and if you want you can watch it instantly on Netflix.

My glasses broke Saturday. I'm not blind without them, but pretty close.

I was already getting an eye exam + new glasses tomorrow...but today, I am wearing taped up glasses straight out of Revenge of the Nerds

Those guys got plenty of action, you'll be all right.

Wormser is a master of aerodynamics and designed a jevelin to go along with Lamar's limp-wristed throwing style.

One blonde conquered. Ms. Project Lead and I are tight now. gg tudors

So Friday night the wife and I went XMas shopping. I ended up in line at TrU with a set of Lego's, a nerf football, and a Star Wars lightsaber... all for my 7 year old daughter.

You're pretty cool, but your daughter has officially become cooler than you are.

Football has become her favorite sport. Poor kid - she's only about 50 pounds and would end up broken in 165 pieces if she actually tried playing. I got her the nerf so we can play outside. We play football in the house with those soft/squeezable footballs all the time. I justify the ball-throwing in the house to my wife by explaining that it's doing wonders for her eye-hand coordination in softball and basketball.

The sword fighting? I don't have an easy explanation for.

I think Ksyrup and his daughter are cool because of the Star Wars purchase. :)

Yeah, I wasn't going to buy that simply because I don't feel like having my knuckles smacked repeatedly over the next few months, but...

You must unlearn what you have learned...

2 full hours and no one has taken this horribly out of context yet?

If you ever want to get the credit card fraud department shutting down your card, a really good way to do it is to go abroad, spend a good bit of money, then try to make a large purchase on the day you return.

*facepalm*

All sorted out, but I should've thought about it before I went to the store..

/tk

Butter knives can cut you. Found that out last night with my thumb.

These are all things I would want for Christmas.

So can plastic knives. I found that out a few months ago while trying to cut a bagel with a plastic knife. Never thought I'd make such a mess with a plastic knife. Never done that with a real knife.

/tk

Damn. Didn't know you could do that with a plastic knife. This stuff is getting more dangerous the older I get.

Sometimes fantasy football rips your heart out.

Last 10 Songs Added to My IPOD
 

Down Boy - Yeah Yeah Yeahs
It's My Own Cheating Heart That Makes Me Cry - Glasvegas
The World Come On - Dandy Warhols
Silent Guns - New Cassettes
You're the Kind of Girl - Lee Fields
Any Way You Want It - Journey (now you KNOW I'm not kidding!)
Fauxhemia - Dead Milkmen
Prisoner (Light Asylum remix) - Binary
Beam Me Up (Jacques Renault remix) - Midnight Magic
Hot Mess (Duck Sauce remix) - Chromeo

Random songs for a random thread.

A little less than 4 and a half hours and I can finally start my vacation.

The Wallflowers have an impressive array of righteous songs for such a small catalog.

Venting time. I'm on the verge of ending a professional relationship, but, don't want it to affect the friendship that is involved. Even though it was a professional relationship to begin with that evolved into that person becoming a friend, I am at my wits end with him and this project of his that I'm working on with him.

While I understand that this project is his 'baby', he keeps blaming the technology for his woes. No matter how many times I try to tell him or get him to understand that when you are dealing with software, it is never going to work 100% they way you THINK it should work. He also paints himself into a corner and commits to submission deadlines before having any of the issues resolved or at the very least, a solution worked out. He's also switched software apps in the middle of the project 2 times. Not because they don't work, but, because they don't work the way he thinks they should work. Which is what I don't get. He's not stupid and he reads up on the software and manuals and reaches out for help when he runs into an issue.

Anyway, it's gotten to the point where he is just too 'bi-polar' (I don't know how else to describe it) and I just don't want to work with him anymore, not only on this project, but, any future projects. However, I feel obligated to see this project to the end.

Anyway, just ranting/venting. Just tired of being stressed out over something that shouldn't be this stressful in my opinion.

Crappy-ass Wendy's baby
 

That Wendy's baby freaks me out. My animosity towards Wendy's is really starting to grow. Where will it all end???

is his name George?

Apparently Stevie Wonder isnt blind. He had an operation 15 years ago that cured him, but he's keeping it quiet for the sake of his "blind gimmick".

Or so some nut I know told me today anyway.

If they also told you the government did it to help with spying...then I would say you were speaking to my ex-wife.

I would just like to make a general announcement. I am in fact ready for the holidays. You can stop asking me about it now.

How about that Tebow kid?!

I believe that would be more accurate in my case.

We had chili the other night. As we were finishing, I grabbed the shredded cheese bag to close it up. Unbeknownst to me, it had laid up against the chili and there was some on the back side of the bag. So when I went to close it, I got chili all over my white t-shirt.

So quickly, I grabbed my napkin, dipped it in my water, and started wiping the chili away. That's when I realized that the blue and green patterns on the napkin were bleeding through onto my shirt. Now I've got a big fucking mess, right?

So I did what any desperate person would do - I improvised. I saw the sour cream, figured it would work well as white-out, and put some on my shirt.

My kids thought it was hilarious. My wife was not quite as enthusiastic about it. I thought it was pretty damn ingenious, if I do say so myself.

For some reason, that reminds me of the Simpsons where they got lizards to eat the birds, then monkeys to eat lizards.

All I know is, my shirt was white when I left the table.

Last day of work until the new year! Now all I have to do is survive a 6 hour red eye flight tonight with a 20 month old and I'll be all set!

This just in...I hate our software used for Design and Quoting..

Skinner: Well, I was wrong. The lizards are a godsend.
Lisa: But isn't that a bit short-sighted? What happens when we're overrun by lizards?
Skinner: No problem. We simply release wave after wave of Chinese needle snakes. They'll wipe out the lizards.
Lisa: But aren't the snakes even worse?
Skinner: Yes, but we're prepared for that. We've lined up a fabulous type of gorilla that thrives on snake meat.
Lisa: But then we're stuck with gorillas!
Skinner: No, that's the beautiful part. When wintertime rolls around, the gorillas simply freeze to death.

Classic scene :)

SI

Sour cream > Gorillas

Have you ever tried sour cream on gorilla meat?

SI

No, I can't say I have. Cottage cheese, sure, but not sour cream. That sounds gross.

If they'd rather die than they better do it, and decrease the surplus population!

PING Pumpy:

Will Smith 'Fresh Prince' reunion photo on Facebook | PopWatch | EW.com

This photo started some buzz of there being some kind of official Fresh Prince reunion in the works, but it appears no, they just actually all hang out on their own time. Except Aunt Vivs I and II.

Went to the grocery store last night and noticed they had whole pork loin on sale for something crazy cheap, like 1.29/lb. Not a professional butcher, but I know what cuts of meat look like. Managed to cut 2 really nice sized roasts, a rack of baby back ribs, some rib chops and some crazy thick porterhouse chops. So, unless someone converts to judiasm in the next week or so, we will have some yummy pork based meals.

I got married about three weeks ago in a very private ceremony - just me, my wife, the minister and two witnesses. The witnesses were a couple that the minister married about 8 years ago and were still very much in love. They were really nice people and said that participating in our ceremony felt like a renewal of their vows.

Fast forward to yesterday. We got a call that the husband collapsed at work and died before he reached the hospital. The doctors aren't sure of the cause but it was most likely a massive heart attack. When his wife got to the hospital the news was so traumatic that she passed out and kept passing out everytime she came to. The shock to her system was so bad that she herself had a heart attack and ended up in the ICU. She is in stable condition now but came very close to death.

This entire ordeal is so incredibly sad and tragic. I am not sure how someone recovers from this type of loss. If you can just keep both of these souls in your thought and prayers it would be appreciated.

Words cannot express how much I hate my sister-in-law. She's a controlling bitch who's has threatened to hit my brother repeatedly in front of us. She's a terrible parent. And frankly I wish she would just go away.

Unfortunately I can't post this anywhere but here, since I'm "friends" with the psycho on FB so that I can see pictures of my nephew.

I don't think there's anyone I've disliked/hated more than her.

/tk

Maybe someone could strap her to a rocket or something?

Also, the kid is 4 and has a cold. So they're giving him a lot of juice which seems reasonable. But they're also giving him multiple packets at a time of adult Emergen-C. I'm no doctor but I'm pretty sure that once you've hit the max Vitamin C per day, your body will just start excreting it. Given that the Juicy Juice box of apple juice they gave him has 100% RDA of Vitamin C, I can't imagine that they're doing him any good with the "extra" vitamin C, I also wonder if there is any danger of giving him multiple "100% RDA" doses of adult vitamins.

Cripes I hate her.

/tk

I bet that kid has neon urine

I'm not a doctor nor a parent, but I was under the impression that giving a child anything labeled for adults, especially medication, vitamins, etc., is a big no-no.

Is there a TV buying thread here somewhere?

This is the most recent one I can find
Can somebody point me to the TV buying discussion thread? - Front Office Football Central

Thanks