Share Your Crazy-Ass Dreams
 

Here's mine from last night, I remember it vividly.

My family and I were in some kind of casting call for a movie. Tom Hanks was in a room interviewing us with a whole group of casting staff. We didn't really know what it was about. I thought I was doing good, me and Tom were hitting it off great, but then he said he couldn't make any decisions about who to cast because that would taint the process. And then he left.

So then we're all herded outside and there's hundreds of other candidates for these roles. We're all given a big card with a letter on it, A, B, C, or D, maybe some others. We had to go to a specific place in a big outdoor set that matched the letter. Then on the card, it told us how we were supposed to act in some kind of riot. Like it'd say, "politely protest" or "break all the shit we can", or "do violence". And there were all these props around, like burned out cars, weapons, etc. Then it started and we all had to riot or protest consistent with the instructions on our card.

I got card A, which meant I mostly stood around and watched other groups raising hell.

I woke up before I found out if I got the part.

To feel financially secure enough that my kids will not have to fight tooth and nail to remain in the middle class.



Oh

My bad


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I dreamt last night I had sex with an alarm clock. One of those old school ones.

So I think dreaming about alarm clocks means that you have somethin in your life you need to address. Dreaming about fucking that alarm clock - I'll leave that to the experts.

Without further intensive psychoanalysis, my interpretation of alarm clock sex is that his timing is off. He missed his opportunity to pull the trigger with someone, or perhaps the trigger was..um..pulled too soon?

I just think it clearly means he has mechanophillia. Don't leave Lathum alone with your toaster.

I think it means I hate the alarm to the point I want to hate fuck it

You need to take a break from both Fallout AND Tom Hanks.

Also...I have audition and performance dreams ALL THE FUCKING TIME

Hawt!

So hawt

Here’s a bad dream I haven’t had before. I just dreamt I was crapping out hornet eggs.

You aliens do some weird things.

I didn't feel like relaying my dreams, but I have crazy long dreams and it fucking sucks. Every night my dreams feel like they last forever. My wife is like, that must be great

It's not. It's not restorative. It's like living a whole other day after youre already exhausted from the real one. It feels like your mind doesn't shut off and you don't actually get to rest.

Add in that I wake up a few times each night, so I'm having multiple long, day-length dreams every night and I feel like I've barely slept in months. now most nights I dread falling asleep.

I remember my dreams best when I wake up at 6, fall back asleep, and wake up for good at 7. Here's this morning's:

I'm working as an intern for some kind of entertainment company in New York City (which I did in real life). But instead of working for one TV show or whatever, we are dispatched to different entities that need us that day. We are sitting around and me and a guy I knew from high school are sent to a Broadway musical. And our task is escorting two kangaroos that we have in our building, to the musical. The kangaroos were in the musical in some capacity. My high school friend doesn't want to go, so I say, "you're going to leave me alone to take two kangaroos across the city on foot?" Another guy volunteers instead and we go downstairs to get the kangaroos. We open the big garage doors to the street, and the kangaroos immediately bolt - we run after them. We call the Broadway musical and they say they're going to get a helicopter to try to track the kangaroos down, and we just have to try to stay close enough to them to see where they go. I am thinking - this is not my fault, they gave us no leashes, no harness, no instruction, nothing. We follow the kangaroos for a while until we lose sight of them. Nobody on the street is acknowledging the kangaroos at all, they're just going about their day. I think that's weird, but wonder if they're used to seeing the kangaroos, and maybe the kangaroos know their way to the theater. Then I wake up, the kangaroo crisis still not resolved.

Edit: I don't know what that was all about, but I did have to do weird errands for the Sally Jesse Raphael Show back in the day, including pick up a giraffe costume at a warehouse in Brooklyn for an "animal episode", and there were live animals on the set and I was worried about them escaping. I remember riding by myself in the back of a limo through NYC with the costume thinking I was the shit