What You Don't Want To Hear From Your Mechanic
 

"Something let go in the engine. We can't get to it. It has to be replaced."


SERENITY NOW.

Here Jerry, there's someone here that wants to talk to you.

{vroom vroom}

Maybe I'll replace it myself. How hard can it be.

Just get me some ball bearings, gauze pads and some Quaker State and it's a piece of cake.

Maybe you got a piece of chicken lodged in there somewhere.

It's possible. I was running those little suckers down last night al la Death Race 3000.

I thought you worked on race cars for 18 years? At least ask your metal shop teacher for some help.

I may have overstated that.

At least I know that when you are driving and it sounds like WWII has come to your very street, something may be amiss.

What kind of car is it? It really isn't too difficult to do an engine swap, as long as you have the right tools. Not sure where you are, but if you are close to Austin, I've got the whole setup at home.

The hard stuff comes in actually taking one apart and rebuilding one. But with a shop manual, the proper tools, and a little mechanical know-how, it's an all-day job to swap one out.

Anyway you can fly you and the whole setup out to NH? I'll provide free lunch the day of the procedure.

I think engine hoists are not allowed as carry-ons anymore. Damn Homeland Security.... :) Maybe Senator knows how to get a waiver or something... :D