Reason #1349832 why life is not fair
 

Is that Edward Scissorhands?

It won't work out. Soon he'll dump her, and your fantasy will take wing again. Perhaps you can change it up a bit, where this time he sees you in the audience at a show, and then invites you backstage. The rest is up to you, but he will be yours. Oh yes, he will.

That's ridiculous. That's a well known crooner named st.cronin. It looks like he shaved off his red beard and let his hair go wild.

st.cronin is one lucky bastard.

She ain't all that great. I watched the movie she was in last night, Employee of the Month and man, she looks okay at times but her lips are just WRONG. They're thin and can get into a weird form at times. Eww. The rest is pretty nice though.

I'd hit it.

Would he let you hit it?

Is it just me, or is his head like 14x bigger than hers?

I bet she doesn't give head because she thinks it's gross.

I'd like to motorboat her...[makes sputtering motorboat noise]

wht else would nick dump her? also i heard shes a slob

Well, let's be honest, it is pretty gross.

She's nothing special.

speaking from experience?

Err,...

Who is this.

I take it, the chick is Jessica Simpson, who is the guy?
Last I heard she was dating Tony Romo.

Is that kid who played Cher's son in The Mask?

John Mayer

Believe it or not, but that was Eric Stoltz.

They never actually dated. He did nail Carrie Underwood, though...

Nah, I think that's the dude that played Elliott in E.T..

Reason# 1349833

Crap! That dude with Jessica looks like Eric Stoltz with the makeup still on. This dude must have a huge pillow.

Oral is a two way street, if I go down on the wife, she's pulling the same duty.

What if you go anal on her?

No desire for anal.

What if she offered you two chicks?

Edit--Would you get two chicks for her?

you make it sound like a chore for you :p

Keep trying, you can learn to enjoy it

!

No, not at all, but you gotta keep things even, otherwise one person is the receiver all the time and never gives.