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wow
my son just had a 2-hour meltdown of epic proportions. it would have been bad enough on its own merits. But, coming on the heels of a very difficult and emotional couple of days...it's just like wow. I think I need a drink or something.
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Drink away, dude.
I am not one that can easily handle the temper tantrums, especially those that go on for that period of time. Now I usually just throw the kid in their room, close the door, and put on my headphones and listen to music for ten minutes or so. Not being able to hear them, even for a little bit, really helps. |
How old?
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I thought Graham was a pretty chill kid - what happened? |
It's amazing how kids can pick up when their parents are distressed/stressed and how that can upset them and lead to temper tantrums.
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he's 5, and crapshoot is right, he's normally a pretty easy going guy. every once in a while, though, he'll wind himself up and then a spiral effect will kick in. he'll do something, get scolded or punished, get mad at being scolded or punished making him do something worse...and so on until he has gotten himself good and mad at the world. he is all good now, but man that was a rough two hours. |
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no doubt about that at all. certainly our stressful week came into play tonight in a big way. |
my daughter is the queen of tantrums. the best remedy that we've seen is ignoring her. sorry to hear this, though. I know how it can ruin your day.
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What was it about? (as if they need a reason)
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When Larissa was 5 she'd throw some crazy ass tantrums so Ant mimicked her every scream, jump, and facial expression and she HATED it with mad passion, it seemed to have worked because she stopped doing it.
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Sounds like a few people around here. You should give him a computer and tell him to start posting. |
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wow - he can even parody tantrums? that is a talented man you have there! :D |
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Not really sure how it all started, but we got to a point when he was just screaming and shouting at me and, after many chances, I sent him to bed early while his sister got to stay up to watch one more show. He was crying and screaming so much, he started losing his voice (which, he reasoned, was why I should change my mind and let him stay up). We're pretty sure it's stress related. My wife hurt her back several weeks ago and has had a long, slow recovery. It's caused a lot of stress because she's a nursing student, and there was a real fear of having to drop out due to all the clinicals she's had to miss. Then, on Tuesday, after she was almost fully recovered, she had a setback and was right back to being almost incapacitated again. I had to take off work to care for her (and the kids), we had to reluctantly cancel a long-planned trip to Pennsylvania to see Pumpy...er, for a wedding, and the nursing school thing reared up again. The next day, he had a couple of accidents at school, which I'm pretty sure were stress-related. Thursday he (and my wife) were doing much better, but then he had the blowup last night after my wife went to clinical (she made it through and is walking normally today, a HUGE relief). Last night on the way to bed, I checked on him and he'd had another accident in his sleep. Poor guy. We kept him out of school today and he seems to be doing fine. My wife is doing much, much better, and now the only stress we have is our concern about his stress. |
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wow indeed, sorry to hear about this man. I don't remember having to deal with any tantrum longer than 25-30 mintues with either of my sons, and even then, they were pretty much the most I could take. Can't think about hearing that for a couple hours...
Hopfeully for you, everything will come back down to normal with mommy getting better and kiddo will too... Good luck! FM |
My second is much more mellow than my first. We struggled with the older daughter's tantrums for about 6 years. She has finally calmed down on her way to 7 years old.
But I have a suggestion that may or may not work. It's something that I didn't actually think of trying until my daughter's last big tantrum. It was this spring. She was hysterical and my standard strategy of be calm, be resolute, give her some time by herself to calm down wasn't working. She would leave her room and come scream some more. She was out of control. This used to happen once every 3 months or so. Anyway, I have never hit her in any way, not that I haven't thought about spanking her. But I haven't. So when she was going ballistic it occurred to me to call her over to the sofa the last time she came down the stairs to continue the fight. I grabbed her, hugged her, and asked her to lie down on the sofa with me and we just lied there together. She began to calm down immediately and soon she was calm and falling asleep. Loving touch is a very underutilized aspect of parenting, IMO. Including by me and I'm someone that believes very much in it. She hasn't exploded again, in part I believe because I have employed this strategy when I see her getting extremely upset. It's really not that important that I win the debate in the next two minutes. I'm in charge and I know I will win in the end. So I basically call a timeout in the fight and hold her. Of course I'm screwed in a few more years when she refuses to let me hold her, but I'll deal with that when I get there. :D |
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Great strategy and outlook :) |
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This is what my wife tries to do and it seems to work very well. Me, I always have to be heavy handed. |
Glad to hear Mrs. Double D is doin' better... back pains suck.
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hrm, Mrs. Double D??? :D FM |
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Ok, this thread is now officially FOFC related..... |
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even funnier because it's true. ;) |
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Do I even need to post it? Pix plz, k thx. ;) |
White child? I'll give ya $20,000.
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No wonder she's got back pain... |
My mom had a great solution for my tantrums. In the drawer next to the stove there was an elephant leather belt which had been my grandfather's. To this day if she gets a potholder I flinch.
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Hahaha :D My maternal great-grandma was too old to chase us so she's grab her cane and whoop us when we least expected it. "Eso les pasa por desobedientes!" - "That's what you get for being disobedient!" Of course it sounds worse and spanish. |
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