The Jerry Lewis Telethon: terrifying and ridiculous
 

Seriously. What in THEE hell is going on with this shit? The telethon was certainly never "must see" in my eyes, but now that Jerry's like 8,000 years old, flubbing every third line, and every single act and celebrity has been scraped from the sludgy bottom of Branson, Missouri's cast offs, throw in the weird, near-exploitation production values, and it's quality television.

Indulge me: Turn the telethon on for 10 minutes at some point during the night, and just write down whatever crap is going on.

I just saw Charro shake her 90 year old boobs in Jerry's face, causing him to flub a joke about erections, while sitting next to three older ladies in wheelchairs, which then led into a man and woman doing a scat version of "feelin' groovy'.

I am amazed this thing is still on.

"Jerry, get the kid a table dance at least!"

Yeah, but hasn't it been moved from network TV to some out of the way Cable channel?

Yet it still raises how many millions of dollars a year? I think it was 65 million last year and how many other telethons were done modeling this format? Katrina's certainly and I'm sure there are many others.

Lewis has definitely lost it and it would be nice if they got someone else...the stars don't come on at all like they used to but the goodness in this thing can't be understated.

Yesterday I saw the Commodores singing "Brick House" to a ventriliquist's puppet. The ventriliquist was toe tapping and grooving while the singers danced around the puppet. It was a train wreck...

LOL I MUST SEE THIS

This used to be the BIG thing to watch when I was a kid. people would literally try to watch the entire telethon start to finish.

So, I'm casually browsing the onion's AV club, as I often do, and come across the headline:

Charo Does Everything In Her Power To Stop The New Golden Age Of Television

Uhhhhh.. break me off a piece of that!

Fancy Feast!