How do you eat corn on the cob?
 

I grilled some corn on the cob tonight and although we've been married seven years my wife noticed that I eat my corn on the cob by using what I'll call the "turn" method. I take a bite at end of ear, turn, next bite in the same column if you will, turn, next bite. When a column is finished I move the ear over. She eats hers by using what I will call the "typewriter" method. Eats across an entire row and then turns eats across an entire row, etc.

How do you eat yours?

Typewriter every time, not sure why - have always done that .. and passed it onto my kids as well :D

Typewriter. Fewer turns. More efficient.

Turn method. What the hell? I didn't even know there was another way.

Typewriter. What the hell? I didn't know people ate turnstile.

I randomly bite at the places where the most kernels are

As a kid I tried various methods including turn, typewriter, and some different zig-zag styles. In the end I settled on typewriter due to it's practicality and satisfying aesthetics.

I turn. I was watching an Iron Chef recently in which the chairman suggested that you should eat your corn vertically, from the tip down, because it gave you better access to the base of the kernel, which is apparently the sweetest part. It didn't work out for me.

These types of threads are why I keep coming back to FOFC, even if I have barely touched any Solecismic games in the past 5-years or so.

I love that this quote was made by "thesloppy:" :)

I should note that my two front teeth are fake, which may indeed contribute to a sloppy(er) corn eating style. I love the satisfied feeling that comes with eating an ear of corn, and knowing you've got like four dozen kernels stuffed in the spaces between your teeth.

I'm with Karl.

She's doing it right

I used to do the typewriter method, my whole life, but just this past year I've switched to the turn. I like it better, I find it easier to bite well that way, I think because you already have cleared one side of the row you're biting, whereas typewriter you're always making a brand new bite.

I avoid going to my parents house during corn season because it is traumatic. I hate corn on the cob.

BURN HIM!

I'm a turner. My wife is a typewriter.

Only for the first row. Once that row is done you have a clear side on every bite.

Typewriter FTW!

It's the only way that makes sense. It's practical and efficient.

The cut method.

Place the cob perpendicular to the plate. Take the knife and cut from the top down to the bottom. Slightly rotate clockwise and repeat until you have a pile of cobless corn goodness on the plate.

screw effeciency!
To everything Turn! Turn! Turn!
There is a seasonm. Turn! Turn! Turn!

I honestly go back and forth.

Edit: That is, I sometimes go typewriter, sometimes turn.

I can't stand getting the shit between my teeth, so...


Ditto.

I would never marry a woman who used the typewriter method. So ya, good luck with all that.

Definitely the turn method - everyone in my family eats it like that.

+1. I hate getting all that shit in my teeth.

Isn't all the shit in your teeth part of the fun of corn on the cob though?

Makes me really want some now...

Is that some foreign word that means "disaster" but is spelled like the english word "fun?"

I thought it was the sweet, buttery, salty deliciousness.

I do the turn method, my girlfriend takes a knife a slices it off

Typewriter style, left to right. I'm writing a love letter to my stomach.

I haven't had a good corn on the cob all summer. This year seems like a bad year for corn here in Ohio...

Run!!!

This. The worst part of corn on the cob is getting stuff caughty between your teeth. With the turn method, once you get it started you don't have to stop. I can eat an entire ear in one shot. It's less messy, too, since there's no corn above where you just took a bite. I basically plow through each column of corn with my top teeth.

With my hands, not with those damn corn holders.

I have my Korean slave girl hold the corn for me while I eat it. But, since that isn't one of the options, I chose typewriter style.

I bet that's how Steven Seagal eats corn. He's also probably a certified master corn eater.

I put it in a crock pot and leave it while I go to work.

Makes me wonder who would win in a corn eating contest. Seagal or Van Damme?

That's got to be some tender and juicy corn.

I pay somebody to eat the shit for me. I'm ballin'.

:lol:

I pay others to de-cob the kernels & put them in a bag which I then throw in the microwave & allow to "pop."

If that's not an option, I eat in a straight line up & down around the edges so as to create a nice, neat margin, then I go all typewriter on it. Butter, seasoned salt & cracked pepper. Preferably grilled.

Only serial killers remove kernels from the cob with a knife.

For those who cut the corn off of the cob, I have discovered a revolutionary new way for you to eat corn!



Freaks.

Funny, I do the same thing, except you can replace the word "kernels" with the phrase "people who screw with me."

Two typewriters, one scatterbrain in my household.

this.