R.I.P. Andy Rooney we hardly... actually we knew you pretty well
 

Andy Rooney Passes

This is why you shouldn't retire.

Isn't that weird how right after someone retires, he just seems to die right away? It's sort of like having one of those little balls of rubber bands that you keep for years and years. [pulls rubber band ball from desk drawer] You wrap them on there and it's like fertilizer... it grows and it thrives. But then you find there's something you like better than rubber bands. Maybe it's one of these colored paper clips. Why do we even need color on paper clips? I don't see anything wrong with these paper clips. [graphic] Or these. [graphic] My brothers and sisters all used regular paper clips, and we turned out fine. [family photo]

It's like that ball of rubber bands is one of your siblings. You need to treat it with the right attention, or it just loses itself. And then you lose interest in it. And then you have rubber bands here. [pic of desk drawer] And here. [pic of kitchen cabinet] That's no way to live. I think we all know that much.

But how big is your rubber band ball supposed to get? Here's mine. [close up] I started it over in 1996, after watching P.J. O'Rourke talking about public buses made me so mad I ate my old one whole.

You ever see how a boa constrictor eats something whole like that, and then has a big lump in his stomach? I did. I wonder why that doesn't happen to us. I think walking around with a rubber band ball in our bellies would make us better people. Just like in the 1940s, when we had to use coupons to get butter from the store. Nobody has to do that any more, either.

Might be a case of the one thing that keeps you around, but you figure out it's time to let go and death soon follows.

He lived a very good life. Would have been 44 when JFK was shot.

Wasnt afraid to speak his mind.

:golfclap:

You got it backwards - people are getting ready to die, so they retire.

This is one of the few of these "celeb deaths" that get posted here that I care about. We used to always watch him when I was younger and I would be miffed if he wasn't on that night for some reason. I think he reminded me of my grandfather, who was similarly curmudgeonly.

Loved Rooney, didn't always agree with him but he had some of the biggest balls in the news media.

RIP oh salty one.

Is he the last of the big name WW2 reporters to pass? I can't think of anyone else.

btw- Kudos to QS.

I didn't know he was 92! I would of guessed 70 at most.
I wonder what 60 minutes will do now?

He had already retired so they will do what they have been doing as of late.

Oh that's right. So are they just expanding their interviews or having something that replaces Rooney's bit?
As you can tell I rarely watch 60 minutes. :)

Bravo! This is easily one of the best posts I've read in a while.

Just have to ask: how spontaneous was this? Did you have this one plotted out the moment you heard he retired like the media has their retrospective stories written in advance or did you let the spirit of Rooney take hold after his passing? :D

Great stuff.

My opinion of Rooney is that he was an old, racist bigot. Adapt or die, he figured out which way to go.

I don't think he was racist. He was arrested in the 40's I believe because he insisted on sitting on the back of a bus with the black soldiers he served with.

He also won an emmy for his writing of "Black History: Lost, Stolen, or Strayed."

Jeez, looks like he's still our angry little kid...

Indeed. Beautifully done, QS.

Don't read the post the wrong way... never thought of him as much of entertainment (might be the generational gap), but everything I've read about him gives me enough of an opinion

I think it's a lot more complicated than that. He was a microcosm of 20th century American society. He certainly had his racist and homophobic moments, but he learned from them and acknowledged he was wrong. By the end of his life he was very tolerant and open-minded.

This. RIP, old man.