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I imagine the Big East commissioner is going to say something along the lines of:
"OK, I know and you know we're a basketball-first conference and our football conference is basically a joke. There is no way we're going to be able to hold onto any of our schools that has a strong football program, so before we get robbed blind, I'm here to make a deal. Leave the core Big East schools alone and we'll let you poach anyone else that allows us to maintain our basketball dominance."
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