I find myself in an unusual place with my running right now. I'm currently in "maintenance" mode. I achieved my short term goals from my spring training:
- Get below 200 pounds in weight
- Run a 10k race
- Run a 10k in under 1 hour
- Run a 5k in under 27:30
I am constantly proud of the progress that I have made. I recently saw a friend at a softball game that I had not seen in about a year. The first thing that people comment on that have not seen me for a while is how much weight I have lost. It makes me proud, I enjoy talking about what a big accomplishment it felt like to me.
In a way, that is what running is for me as well, a way to constantly better myself, to see improvement each step of the way. I can work on this for the next 10 years and continue to improve. Running (and other forms of exercise) is an iceberg to move. It goes slow, but hard work eventually is noticed after considerable time. With that hard work comes a far greater sense of accomplishment. This isn't being proud that I got a high score in a video game, or that I figured out how to put together that toy for the kids on Christmas morning. Only I know how much effort and sweat went into reaching these goals, and perhaps only I can truly appreciate how much it means to me.
So back to where I am this month.. Practically the entire month of June I'm pretty much in maintenance mode. I have new goals for the Fall lined up. I want to get below 190 pounds before the end of the year. I want to run a half marathon and speed related, I would like to get to a 25 minute 5k time. None of these things will happen tomorrow, or next week or even next month. Just like every other one of my goals, these will take time for me to accomplish.
Maintenance mode for my weight loss means that I am not actively dieting super heavy these days. I am very careful to try to not run at too much of a calorie deficit with all of my exercise I am doing. To train properly, my body needs the energy or I'll not meet exercise related goals. I don't see the weeks any more where I lose 10 pounds in a week that I once did. Now a gradual 1/2 pound a week is pretty good progress. As long as it continues to go down slowly but surely I know that i will at some point reach my goal..
Maintenance mode for my running has me in between training plans. I start my half-marathon training next Monday. The last few weeks has been pretty much looking to keep a base level of fitness. Trying to keep my fitness level up without greatly increasing my fatigue. I have used this month to try to have some fun with things, to have a little chance to see how my running fitness has improved. So far this month, I ran a 10k race, a 5k race, a 10k challenge and this upcoming weekend Doing a half-marathon relay with my wife. We don't expect to win, or come close to winning.. in fact we may even be the last place relay team.. but we're going to have fun doing it. We have a baby sitter (my mom), we have a hotel and a get away destination.. and are just going to enjoy the day and the race and have fun doing it. Not everything to do with my running or my exercise/fitness is about setting new personal records... I need to remind myself that one of my biggest goals was to get my health under control so I could be a more active part of my family and do things with the kids that I struggled with previously due to my weight.
I have an issue with Anxiety.. I let everything stress me out.. and constantly live on edge. I have been working on better handling my stress and anxiety perhaps just as hard as my running or my weight loss for the past 9 months. Absolutely everything stressed me out.. work stressed me out.. taking the kids somewhere stressed me.. dealing with money at home stressed me.. even going over to a party at a friend's house caused me anxiety... I feel like earlier this week I didn't necessarily hit a break through, but I realized how far I had come in dealing with my anxiety....
I recently taught my youngest daughter how to ride without training wheels on her bike. She did a good job, only took us 3 afternoons (about 45 minutes each time) before she got it. Now she rides entirely on her own. Sometimes she is a little shaky, but she's getting the hang of balance now. I decided on Monday that it was time to go out to a nearby bike trail with her, and actually ride my bike with her. In the past, trips like this with my oldest daughter, I stressed out the entire time. Was worried she would fall, would get hurt, would accidentally crash into someone else on the trail.. or numerous other reasons.. I spent the entire time waiting for the inevitable to happen.. and it caused me to not enjoy it.. to almost feel like it was a chore.. This time, I just relaxed and basically went along for the ride. She would go too fast on the downhill because it was fun.. and I just let her. She didn't crash (even though once or twice came darn close). When she wanted to stop for a water break we stopped.. After 3 miles we were done, and I realized... I actually had alot of fun.
So I guess during this month of just maintaining.. of not pushing super hard on weight loss or exercise, I've been able to spend a little time as well realizing that there are other parts of my life or my relationship with my family that have been improving as well. I need to remember that sometimes when I go out for a run it isn't to improve my fitness.. but instead it can be just to enjoy going for a run.