Again.... THANK YOU ALL! My wife takes it harder than me - she takes it very personally. It's easier for her to remember that it's really just not his fault...he sees the world through eyes that are (I hate to say it) distorted, and we both feel bad for him. My #1 concern is that he NEEDS to be able to assimilate himself into the world...and when someone slights him, to not impulsively strike back with a fervor beyond what is necessary. For whatever reason...it seems that piece is not functional in his brain.
My wife had a conversation with him tonight at bed time...where he was talking about his "friends" at school...and how he wants to be good. Mind you - these are the same kids he hurt...he really has no idea how to be a friend. He's kinda lost (as are we).
There's a huge part of me that says, "Why me? Why us? We're good people - we don't deserve this." Then, I think, he doesn't deserve this either - and this is not about you. Couples who have kids like this (obviously) find it very stressful and I am the luckiest man alive to have the wife that I have. We've maintained our relationship through all the garbage and crap and the day-to-day stress (which is non-ending). This will, no doubt about it, be the longest-running thread in FOFC history
- as this will be ongoing.
Chubby - yes - he does take an interest in keeping score - in soccer on Saturday his team won, 13-2 (we heard about it all day - ha!). He scored 2 goals and was the proudest little goofball in the world
.
If people take ANYTHING from this thread, it is this: When you see a kid acting up and misbehaving in front of their parents - it MAY NOT be their parenting. We have an absolute DARLING 4 year old girl who is...she heals us each day by being the way she is. If you see a child being an a$$ - don't judge the parents....understand the hell they are going through. All through my life I always thought, when seeing kids act up in the mall, I would say to myself, "I will NEVER EVER let my kid get away with that." Just understand...sometimes...you're dealt the hand you're dealt...the parents can hopefully mold that child - but sometimes the child is what he is.
Next time you see a kid act up in a public place - just say to the parent "it's ok". They'll think it's not...and they'll know it's not - because it isn't. But there's just, sometimes, not a damn thing you can do.
My apologies for the rant...or whatever this is. Life just sucks right now.