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Originally Posted by Hell Atlantic
i feel for you. one thing i like about your posts is your ability to be brutally honest about your son. you know there's a problem with him and you don't gloss over his shortcomings. i think that might be what helps you through this - that you in fact acknowledge all isn't right with your boy, that you understand it's out of your hands how he acts and how he acts isn't a result of your parenting, and that for him to succeed he's going to need professional help. it must be hard to admit that he's the way he is, so even though i don't have a word of advice for you i admire you being straight forward and open. best of luck.
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Thanks HA - from reading your posts, I know you are brutally honest
, but you call it as you see it. You're right...I do acknowledge he has problems - we saw them when he was only a month old.
Really, during today's meeting with the guidance counselor, principal, "interventionist"...they said it was painful to watch him in class because you could see he was trying to "be good" and that we need to work together to help him. I hate to be flippant, but I told them "after 6 1/2 years, if you have a suggestion, please tell me" because we have tried everything under the sun. Yes - he has issues and yes, it's truly sad he (for lack of a better phrase) doesn't have a clue. But, it's our job as parents to prepare him to assimilate into society and it's just not happening at this point.
About feeling alone...I know my parents (and her parents) don't get this...but it would be SUCH a help if one of them stepped up and said to my WONDERFUL, GIVING, INTELLIGENT, BEAUTIFUL wife, "you know what? We'll take the kids out today, you deserve a break." ESPECIALLY considering the child we have and the way he is what he is. I know that's not really the way my parents are - we're kind of...you deal with your business kind of people. My wife, however, is just waiting for her Mom or Dad to step up and help out in this way...but they've never volunteered. Part of me says it's not fair to them - they have no clue. But...my wife talks to her parents a lot more than my parents...and she is just waiting....waiting to hear "how can we help?" form her parents and it never happens. I know how it is - you just want to deal with your own garbage (and I wish my parents could see the forest through the trees sometimes) but it would be nice if people understood that you're not a jackass and that you're hurting and that there are easy ways to help.
wow....this went a direction I didn't intend. People are people...if they don't extend themselves to you, it's not their fault - they are what they are.