Im in the camp, of poor judgement...should have known his audience better.
But not sexual harassment.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Lathum
yeah.
I don't want to get too deep in to this, but the thing people don't get about sexually harassment is it doesn't matter how you, the harasser, feel about it. The issue is how it makes others feel. Hopefully he can learn a lesson from this.
Another example of how different women will react differently.
Friend of ours, early 40s woman, attractive, is on a plane this morning. She is in the aisle seat with no one else in the row. Just as doors close guy gets on the plane and has the window seat. Friend says to the guy "ah man, you screwed up my plans to lay down." Guy then says " you can just put your head on my lap"
At best highly inappropriate, and at worst, blatant sexual harassment. Friend was creeped out by this, and now has to sit my this guy on a cross country flight. My wife was on the opposite end that it was a poor joke, but not harassment.
You just never know how your actions will project on someone, and how their life experiences shape how they perceive those actions.
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This one....to me is even worse.
I mean I didnt hear the exchange, maybe he said it lewdly and suggestively...or maybe he was just being polite. Would it have been as bad if he'd said, you can put your feet in my lap?
To your point about the receiver's feelings being the ones that matter. Did she stop to consider that maybe she made this guy uncomfortable by saying he had ruined her plans. I mean maybe he would have seriously had a complex all day that he started his day off by ruining someone else's plans.
Now I am very careful about what I say at all times to all but my closest of friends. To the point of usually not even offering an opinion on debatable topics. Small town and a successful business makes me hyper-aware there are always folks who would love to see me screw up and try to find a payday.
But at my core, how I feel and not how I act, Im of the opinion that saying you are offended by anything another person says is basically admitting you're incapable of controlling and managing your emotions so it is everyone else's responsibility to do it for you. And to that I say put on your thick skin and grow up.