[revrew]

Draft Day: Dragons GM Jack Ledger holds first ever press conference

The Des Moines Dragons were already the talk of the draft, but their reclusive general manager dropped a complete bombshell of a news story on draft day by announcing a press conference. Dragon GM Jack Ledger had never previously held a press conference, in fact, had rarely been seen by the press since taking over the Dragons four years ago.

Every reporter in the room and every sports pundit watching on a monitor had theories about what the Dragons would do about the Bears holding the No. 1 overall draft pick and thus, the expected rights to Iowa superstar quarterback Grayson Shello. Some predicted Ledger would stick with the incredibly popular QB Dakota Corriveau, who had just led the Dragons to the NFC championship. Others were certain Ledger would pull off the trade of the century to jump up and grab Shello.

When Ledger stepped to the microphone with Head Coach Kevin O'Dea behind him, the collective power of flashbulbs popping nearly gave the pale Ledger an instant sun burn.

LEDGER: Ladies and gentlemen of the press, thank you for attending. I know you've been – ah, buzzing – like bees, like busy, busy bees, about the future of the quarterback position in Des Moines.

I appreciate all the free publicity. (Laughter from the press)

But today, I'm going to make myself very, very clear. We have done our due diligence. We have reviewed Corriveau's performance. We have studied Grayson Shello. We have looked at what it would take to extend Corriveau's contract and how that compares to what it would take to trade for Shello.

So, yes, to confirm the rumors, we have contacted the Chicago Bears about making a deal. (Stirring from the press).

That's not because we lack confidence in Corriveau. He's a hero in Des Moines. But before we made a decision, we needed to know what it would cost, you see, what it would cost to keep him, and what it would cost to trade for a successor.

And in the end, the answer was remarkably easy. When we asked the Bears what it would take to pry Shello from their clutches, their response was basic-ally, "Over my dead body."

And since we don't plan to start an actual war with Chicago … (nervous laughter from the press)

It's simple. The cost compared to the benefit was just too high.

We believe Dakota Corriveau can and will lead us to a Super Bowl victory, and we're not willing to actually murder someone in Chicago for the chance that Shello can do it better.

So we will, as they say, "dance with the one who brung ya." I look forward to negotiating a contract extension with Corriveau's agent, and, since we can't actually murder Chicago, we look forward to simply beating them as often and as brutally as possible.

Thank you.

And with that, the Clown Prince of Social Media stepped away from the podium, off the dais, and allowed his head coach to answer any remaining questions.